If you haven't read the spoilers for I Kissed a Girl or don't wanna know any spoilers, I strongly suggest you DON'T read this. I don't own Glee. Thanks to ImaginetheWorldWicked (MEH not ALJ) for beta-ing this.
****************************Quinn's house at night**************************
Puck POV
"Let's do it." Quinn led me to her room and pushed me onto her bed. I pushed her away.
"No!"
"Why not? All of sophomore year you wanted me."
"Why do you wanna do it now?" She sighed.
"I want another baby." She pushed me back onto the bed.
"I can't."
"Two seconds, seriously. We can do it with our clothes on." She took off her underwear and reached for my zipper. "Unzip!" She commanded.
"I can't. I had that surgery dudes get so they can't have kids. I also can't do that to my boy." And I'm in love with Shelby, I mentally added.
"You mean a vasectomy."
"Yeah, that's what it's called."
"Your boy?"
"Sam. You put out for me, you put out for Finn, but never for Sam. Why?"
"You know why for you, Finn I wanted to be prom queen and the only way to get him to run is to do it with him."
"You never answered my question."
"I was scared that I would be terrible." She covered her face, clearly embarrassed.
"Really? That's BS. I don't believe you."
"I'm serious. I love him and I didn't want him to stop liking me because I'm bad."
"Did you just say you love him?"
"I said loved." She said really fast.
"Why so fast to deny it?"
"Because it's not true."
"Yes it is."
"Is not!"
"Is too!" We argued like six year olds.
"Is not!"
"Just admit it. I won't tell him. I won't tell anybody."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
"Fine. I love him."
"I knew it!"
"Stop smiling like that, it's creepy."
"I'm just happy I'm right for once. I have to go I'm exhausted."
"Stay here."
"Excuse me? You said you were in love with Sam."
"Not like that. You look exhausted. Stay."
"Fine. But you better not try anything."
*********************************Morning********************************
(still Puck POV)
My phone vibrated on the table.
From: Sam
my dad got his old job back. im coming back 2 lima. plz dont tell any1
To: Sam
i wont
Except for Quinn. She started to wake up.
"I can't go to sleep next to you anymore." I said.
"Why not?"
"You moan in your sleep... really loudly."
"What do I say?"
"Sam, faster, harder, sexy, don't stop. Stuff like that."
"That is really embarrassing."
"It's worse to listen to. I was awake ALL NIGHT!"
"I'm sorry."
"I have to tell you something, but you have to promise to keep it a secret."
"What?"
"Sam's coming back."
"And why shouldn't I tell anyone?"
"Because I'll tell the whole school you moan in your sleep."
"You better not."
"Don't think I won't."
"Fine, I won't tell... on one condition."
"What?"
"Make sure he walks into the choir room shirtless." She smiled like she was thinking dirty thoughts.
"In your PG-13 dreams."
"In my PG dreams. You don't wanna know what happens in my PG-13 dreams."
"You are a pervert, a closet pervert."
"I'm in love. You have to admit he's sexy."
"I'm a straight guy."
"So?"
"I don't think of guys that way and he's my best friend."
"Again, so?"
"It's creepy. You're creepy."
"Even though I won't tell anyone, why can't I?"
"He told me not to tell."
"Then why did you tell me?"
"So you can get him back."
"What about Mercedes?"
"She really likes Shane. I don't want her to break up with him so she won't hurt Sam's feelings." She hugged me. "What was that for?"
"For being a good friend. Since you're a good friend to me, I'm gonna be a good friend to you. Change your hair back to how to how it was last year."
********************************December*******************************
Puck POV
"I'm back as promised." Sam said to me. I started the plan.
"You see that girl over there?" I pointed to Quinn "You should go for her."
"You mean Quinn? I wanna be with Mercedes."
"She has a boyfriend and called you 'so last June'."
"I don't believe you. Mercedes really liked me when we were dating."
"She might have really liked you but she really really likes Shane. I still think you should go for Quinn. I slept with her one night and she said some pretty weird things in her sleep."
"Excuse me?"
"I worded that wrong. I mean I slept over... I mean we were in bed together... I mean we slept next to each other... I mean we actually went to sleep next to each other."
"Oh. So what did she say?"
"Ask her yourself." She started approaching us like planned.
"Hey, you're back." She said.
"Yeah. So what do you say in your sleep?"
"You told him?" She asked me. "I. Hate. You." She said like planned.
"What do you say?" Sam asked.
"I'll tell you if you kiss me." He grabbed her face and kissed her.
"What do you say?" He whispered to her.
"You'll find out tonight." She said and walked away.
"What?" He was confused.
"Poor, confused little virgin." I said. His eyes widened. He jumped up in the air.
"YES!"
The end!