I was rewatching the episode from season one where they torture the Grounder and I just really love the way Bellamy squeezes Clarke's shoulder when she's trying to get the grounder to tell her the poison antidote so this is a brain child from that. I don't own the 100 or anything affiliated. Enjoy! :)
Her mind was going ten thousand miles a minute, her body disconnected as she fumbled for the small vials that suddenly seemed forty times smaller than they really were. She could hear her ragged breathing and the blood roaring through her ears over the frantic knocking of her heart against her rib cage. Everything was going wrong. Finn was supposed to be okay and they weren't supposed to be torturing people. Since when had they turned into sadists and animals? Since when was torturing someone an accepted method of acquiring knowledge?
There was suddenly a warm hand on her shoulder, right where her neck and shoulder connected. A squeeze, and suddenly Clarke could breathe again. Her hands were trembling as she held the small pallet of vials and she looked up. Bellamy's brown eyes stared back at her, just as pained as hers, and she wondered if he was squeezing her shoulder to support her or if he was doing it to support himself. There was a mutual understanding. Neither of them wanted to be doing this, but they weren't alone.
It turned out that the torturing was unnecessary, and Octavia would probably never forgive her brother or Clarke for the way they'd treated her precious grounder, but Clarke just didn't have the energy to care. She sat inside the drop ship, on the second level with the hatch closed so that nobody would disturb her, and tried to cry. No tears came. She felt no remorse. She was numb. The thought made her mind ache and she curled into a tighter ball, fingers digging into her legs. At least she could feel physical pain.
It was Bellamy who found her on the drop ship, and it was Bellamy who sat next to her, hands resting loosely on the cold metal floor. Clarke didn't look up as he spoke.
"We did what we had to do." He reminded her softly. "Even if it meant hurting that man." The sentence made her flinch.
"That man." She repeated, barely a trembling whisper. "We tortured a man today, Bellamy. A human being." Bellamy had known that was what was bothering Clarke. Her moral compass was going haywire, fighting for control with the more animalistic survival side. It wasn't a pleasant battle and Bellamy was glad he didn't have to fight it. He was a monster anyway.
The tears came after that, one right after another until a river was coursing down her cheeks and she somehow ended up in Bellamy's arms. He rocked them back and forth and let her cry and didn't try to tell her it was okay, because if he was being honest with himself and her, nothing was okay. Nothing was going to be okay for a very long time. But at least they weren't alone.