Disclaimer: Ok, first things first: This was not written by me. I simply took it from a page and tweaked it a bit. All due creidit goes to Bob Yewchuk , ok? Oh, and...::yawn::...Paramount owns...::drool::...Voyager...and...a-and...::head smacks keyboard; jerks awake::...all characters herein...::collapses::
Rated: PG, I guess.
Summary:::whispers:: Just read it, fer God's sakes!
Teeheehee, if you really want to feed me, email it to me at: wubbut2000@hotmail.com I'll be SURE to email the feedback to Mr. Yewchuk once I get his address.
Flames are gleefully fed to my dog, Toby. TOBY FOR PRES.!
ON WITH THA FIC!-~Alyn
Your Captian Might Be A Redneck If...
Your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
She paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
You have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
She refers to Klingons as "Critters"
She refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
She has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum foil
There's a stuffed possum in the Ready Room
She installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the deflector sheild
She says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing frequencies"
She hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
She rewires her Comm Badge onto her belt buckle
She replicates items from the Graceland gift shop
The primary colour of the ship is "bondo"
She keeps a six-pack under her command chair and a gun rack above it
She says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
She can't wait to go off-duty so she can wear her favorite baseball cap
She has a hand-tooled holster for her phaser
She has ever been too drunk to use the Transporter
Her uniform has a slogan on it.
She sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
Visiting dignitaries have heard about her giant beer can collection
She programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
She calls her First-Officer "Buddy" instead of "Chakotay"
She watches professional wrestling on the main viewscreen
Her orders to set coordinates include the phrase "Over yonder"
She paints the starship John Deere green
She refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
There's a spit cup attached to her command chair
Her moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
She grabs an Ensign and says "Lookit this before I flush it!"
Her idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
She wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
Her idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of beans & weenies
Rated: PG, I guess.
Summary:::whispers:: Just read it, fer God's sakes!
Teeheehee, if you really want to feed me, email it to me at: wubbut2000@hotmail.com I'll be SURE to email the feedback to Mr. Yewchuk once I get his address.
Flames are gleefully fed to my dog, Toby. TOBY FOR PRES.!
ON WITH THA FIC!-~Alyn
Your Captian Might Be A Redneck If...
Your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
She paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
You have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
She refers to Klingons as "Critters"
She refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
She has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum foil
There's a stuffed possum in the Ready Room
She installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the deflector sheild
She says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing frequencies"
She hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
She rewires her Comm Badge onto her belt buckle
She replicates items from the Graceland gift shop
The primary colour of the ship is "bondo"
She keeps a six-pack under her command chair and a gun rack above it
She says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
She can't wait to go off-duty so she can wear her favorite baseball cap
She has a hand-tooled holster for her phaser
She has ever been too drunk to use the Transporter
Her uniform has a slogan on it.
She sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
Visiting dignitaries have heard about her giant beer can collection
She programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
She calls her First-Officer "Buddy" instead of "Chakotay"
She watches professional wrestling on the main viewscreen
Her orders to set coordinates include the phrase "Over yonder"
She paints the starship John Deere green
She refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
There's a spit cup attached to her command chair
Her moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
She grabs an Ensign and says "Lookit this before I flush it!"
Her idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
She wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
Her idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of beans & weenies