I Would Never Cause You Pain
"…he's not going to be there." Amanda was finishing as her and Lee entered the Q bureau.
"Amanda why wouldn't he be there?" Lee asked clearly annoyed.
"If I were him I wouldn't be there." She stated calmly.
Lee had to smile at that, "Amanda if you were a national terrorist--"
"Stetson that's not what I meant and you know it. Just listen. IF I was trying to keep a low profile because the best agents in America were looking for me I would not hide out in a warehouse. It's too cliché."
"The best agents?" Lee questioned grinning.
"I was talking about me and Francine." she replied with a sparkle in her eyes.
"Oh really." He stared blankly at her and with a one swift motion Lee had Amanda pinned against the wall kissing her passionately. Her eyes were wide with shock, and when Lee broke off breathless he met her gaze. He was about to triumphantly declare he was the better agent when he saw the panic in her eyes. He cursed himself. She had recovered from her ordeal with Birol so quickly Lee had almost forgotten she still had flashbacks. Apparently his stunt caused another scene to her recall. "Amanda, I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?" He asked quietly.
She was shaking a bit and closed her eyes to compose herself. "I'm okay. It just… I just… need a minute," she answered after finding her voice.
"Come here," He hugged her gently. She was stiff but after a few minutes relaxed.
Francine walked through the door and surveyed the scene. She was catching those two more and more. When would they learn that they weren't fooling anyone? She was about to comment when she saw the tears running down Amanda's face. She and Amanda weren't the closest friends but they were friends. The truth was that she was jealous at first because Amanda was better at their job then she was. That was solitified by the case with Birol. She never put herself first to escape and she never showed weakness… in public put occasionally Francine would catch her locked in a memory staring at nothing. Obviously something had happened to cause her to be this upset. "Lee, Amanda," she started quietly. Lee looked at the blonde. The pain in his eyes clearly showed. "Billy wants us in his office. He thinks he has a lead on Armon."
"We'll be there in a minute." Lee began to answer.
"Lee go ahead, I'll meet you down there." Amanda whispered.
He started to protest but knew she needed to compose herself before she met with their section chief. "Okay." He replied and whispered in her ear, "I would never cause you pain. I'm sorry."
Puzzled at first Amanda realized Lee was blaming himself for her reaction.
He had caught her off guard. Normally she would have enjoyed such a passionate kiss; however she was reminded of Addi Birol pinning her in a corner and kissing her roughly. He pressed her so hard she wanted to cry. At the time she tried to pretend it was Lee, anything to get through it but it hadn't worked. Her fear choked her as Birol began groping her. Amanda cast the thought away with a shiver and looked at Lee. She knew he needed some confirmation that she was okay and wasn't angry with him. "It's not your fault, it was Addi… I know you would never hurt me." She squeezed his hand in reassurance. "I will be right there."
Lee didn't want to leave her but he didn't want to argue with her either. He silently walked out the door with Francine but his mind stayed in the office.
**********************************************
"…Pike's warehouse. I want you and Amanda to lead the strike." Billy was finishing as Amanda walked into her superior's office. "Good morning Amanda how are you?" Melrose asked.
"Fine, sir."
"I was filling Lee and Francine in a lead on Armon's location."
"At a warehouse?" She questioned with a smirk. Lee was relieved to see she had composed herself but he still worried. She was meeting with Dr Pfaff but he felt she was doing so well he only wanted her to check in every week. Lee knew his Amanda. She had buried the fear while Birol had her and had not let it all out. She was dealing with it now but she would never truly move on until she confronted her memories. He shot her a look in reply to her warehouse comment, "yes, at a warehouse." He smiled.
Billy knew something had passed between his two best agents and it pleased him. Lee had been a good agent before Amanda but now he was the best. He needed her to complete him. Billy watched over the past three years as Lee leaned on Amanda, but now it was Amanda's turn to lean on Lee. He was concerned that she had returned to work too soon. Her debriefing was difficult. Billy had sat through thousands of debriefings but with Amanda it was different. She always saw the good in people and she never carried a gun. Billy doubted she would kill someone even to save her life or someone else's. That's what made her such a good agent. She found alternatives. Where a seasoned agent would shoot she would talk. Amanda referred to it once as 'confusing them into surrender'. "I want you three to work on organizing a strike team and I want it rolling in one hour." He ordered.
Amanda and Lee headed purposefully to the task room. "Amanda are you sure you should go?" Lee asked.
"Lee I'm fine. Besides he won't be there anyway remember." She answered trying to lighten the mood and change the subject.
Lee caught on that now was not the time to push the issue with Birol and he took her queue of humor. "You're so sure he's not there aren't you?"
"Positive." She answered quickly.
"How do you know? I bet you he's there as we speak." Lee returned.
"A bet huh?"
She caught him off guard, "Uh yeah." He stumbled. He hadn't thought she would take his comment serious.
"Winner chooses the stakes?" She questioned.
Lee's eyes lit up, he liked where this was going. They had been dating for a few months and he proposed while Birol had them but they hadn't had a lot of time alone. He was seeing an opportunity for just that. "I'm game. The winner gets their deepest desire fulfilled."
Her eyes widened pleased. Either way she had a feeling she would win this bet. "Okay, but we write our 'deepest desire' down now and reveal them to each other after I win." She teased.
"Deal, only after we arrest Armon at that warehouse." She laughed an 'you're funny but I will win' laugh and they searched for some paper and a pen.
*************************************************
An hour later Lee and Amanda pulled up to the warehouse in his corvette and a van behind them containing the other agents. "Amanda why don't you wait in the van?" He asked.
Just as he said it he saw the fear rise up in her eyes again. "Lee… I can't. Last time I waited in the van…" She trailed off and instantly he was sorry. He was sorry for opening his mouth and he was sorry for ordering her to wait in the van that day. It never occurred to him that his order was the reason Birol got her. Once again he had hurt her with out knowing it.
"Amanda, I had no idea, it never dawned on me. The whole thing. It was my fault." He answered
"No. No Lee it wasn't your fault you shouldn't think that. I didn't mean to make you feel guilty, I just need to be by your side now."
"Always," he answered. They got out of the van and met the rest of their team. Everyone was checking their guns and there was anticipation in the air.
Francine walked over to Amanda and pulled her aside. She placed a gun in her friend's hands. Amanda felt the weight and coldness in her hands and looked up at Francine questioningly. "Please Amanda take this with you. Even if you don't use it. The bad guys aren't afraid of a purse even if you yell freeze." Francine joked reminding Amanda of the first case she was recruited on. The only way to save Lee was to pretend she had a gun and distract the man long enough for Lee to take him out. Francine had never let Amanda live it down.
Amanda smiled and appreciated the gesture. "Thank you Francine. I know people have been sort of walking on eggshells since I came back. I'm okay really though. I have flashbacks but Dr Pfaff said to expect those."
"It's just that this case is a little too close to home you know?" Francine answered nervously.
"I know Francine, believe me I know. I keep reminding myself that Birol is behind bars. But he's no different than any other terrorist we face."
"No he's not. All terrorist manipulate you mind with fear. Addi used physical threats and pain but Armon uses drugs. Armon won't hesitate to turn friends against each other either." Francine had hit a nerve. Amanda heard about a Russian agent killing his partner because Armon drugged him. Addi had used Lee to get to her but Armon would use Lee to hurt her. She shuttered and squeezed her friend's hand.
"Alright let's roll." Lee announced. He leaned over and whispered to Amanda, "I've got a bet to win." She slapped him with her left hand and that's when he noticed the gun. He knew she scored high on her target practice, higher than Francine but Amanda wouldn't let him rub it in her face, but when it came to shooting people, even pictures of people she hesitated.
She noticed his gaze on her revolver. "Francine thought it would be more threatening than my hand." She smiled sticking her thumb up and index finger out. Lee nodded his approval and they converged on the vacant looking warehouse. Entering through the back Lee was taken by surprise as he was knocked aside and Amanda was grabbed. The man held a knife to her throat drawing blood as he pressed it against her skin.
"Back up Scarecrow or the woman dies." He ordered. Lee recognized him as Armon's brother Raul. Amanda was frozen. She felt the cold steel digging into her throat. Lee begged her with his eyes to use the gun she still clutched in her right hand. Raul hadn't seen the weapon and seemed over confident, but if Amanda didn't use it she was dead. Lee watched as Raul started to push harder on the knife. Amanda moaned as blood flowed. She shut her eyes and thought of her boys. She couldn't die and leave them alone. If she could see her captor position she knew she could just wound him, but she was blinded by darkness and pain. She also knew she had one chance and she couldn't blow it. Amanda inhale and brought the gun up behind her back and fire one shot. She fell to the ground as the man slumped over onto her. Her knees were weak already and the added weight caused her to go down like a sack of bricks.
"Amanda!" Lee cried and rolled Raul off her. She was cover with his blood as well as her own and she was in shock. Lee placed pressure on her neck and ordered Francine to call for an ambulance as she rounded the corner having heard the shot. All she had seen was a lot of blood and Amanda on the ground. This was enough to cause her to sprint to the van.
"Did I ki—Is he dead?" She questioned.
"I think so Amanda he gave you no choice. He was about to kill you."
She only nodded her agreement and hugged him tightly. He heard the sirens coming closer. Francine ran up with the paramedics behind her. They were directed to Amanda but she protested. "No, look at him first. See if you can save him."
"Amanda--"
"Lee I shot him."
"And he tried to slice your neck open." He fought back still placing pressure on her wound. It didn't seem serious but Lee wasn't taking any chances.
"I have to know, I don't want to live knowing I hadn't tried everything possible." She answered back.
The paramedics turned their attention back to Amanda realizing the effort was hopeless. The bullet had penetrated his heart. "He's gone. Died instantly." They informed her as they started tending to her. Lee backed away just enough to let them work but he clutched her hand. The knife had gone deep but blood wasn't spurting. "He missed the artery, barely though." The paramedic replied. "Is any thing else hurt?"
Amanda thought for an instant and noticed a dull pain in her side. Rubbing the sore area the man took a look. There was a faint hand shaped bruise starting where Raul was restraining her and several other black and blue marks surrounding it. "This one's fresh but these others, when did you get them?" Amanda was questioned groaning as hands poked around the wounded area.
Amanda glanced at Lee. He had pain etched all over his face. "Those are from two weeks ago. Apparently I'm a magnet to terrorists." She replied trying to lighten the mood. She squeezed Lee's hand, "I'm okay. It doesn't hurt."
"This one will. He may have cracked a rib." Amanda was informed groaning as he pushed on her rib.
"Amanda…" Lee began.
"I didn't notice. I was preoccupied with a knife." She answered.
"Can you walk Mrs. King?"
"I think so." Amanda began to stand and staggered a little. It was more than resolve that kept her on her feet. Lee had a tight grip on her are to steady her. "Can't breath…"
To be continued…