Hogwarts Gets Horny

By Hoppe, Alyssa, and Michelle

Okay, so it's the 6th year at Hogwarts. Fucker. And it's the Welcoming Feast. Bitch. Which MEANS- Everyone is horny as fuck and the halls are littered with sperm and vaginal discharge. Those who have their periods are totally missing out and jumping from the top tower in a suicide attempt. This includes Ginny. Yeah fuck you bitch. No one liked you anyway. Fucking prude-ass redhead.

Anyway, back on subject. No one knows WHY everyone gets so God damn horny the first day back, but they do. The house-elfs put Horny Humpingjuice in all the treacle. Because it's fucking mating season and their semen and shit always ends up in the food. ANYWAY. Wow this story is too damn hot.

Fuck this writing proper.

Harry- "Ron...your erection is rather large."

Ron- "Oh-it is? I'm sorry, Snape walked by, I couldn't help it. I'll just turn away now."

Harry stroked Ron's...

arm.

You sick ass perv. What the fuck did you think I was gunna say?

Harry -"No baby, it's okay. I like it that way. I want you inside my ass. Because I have no vaginal hole. Sadly. Let's anal, bitch."

Harry and Ron begin to take their pants off. Harry pulls Ron's knickers down and gasps. Red, curly pubic hairs were sprouting from his pale ballsacks.

Harry- "Oh Ron, tis very fucking beautiful. Did you know your pubes are the same color as your eyebrows?"

Ron- "Why yes, Harry. That's always the rule."

Harry inserted his penis into Ron's pale, pimply ass. Ron moaned out with desire.

Ron- "OH HARRY! FUCK YOU'RE SO GOOD. OH FUCKING YEAH!"

Suddenly, the door swung open. Hermione looked very shocked at first. Then she smiled.

Hermione- "Can I join?"

Harry and Ron- "FUCK YES."

So they had a mighty fine threesome, full of moans and orgasms and shit like that. If you've had sex before, you know what it's like. If you haven't, get out there you fucking pussy. Why the hell are you reading this? You wanna know what its like? (P.S. I am STILL a virgin. Psh like that'll last.)

BABOOM! Draco Malfoy walked in, looking unusually hot. His blonde hair was extremely messy, and for some odd reason, he was soaking wet, his shirt off revealing his 6-pack. Why he was wet? No one knows.

Draco- "Did you know- if you stick your wand up your ass and do'Crucio' it's the best orgasm ever!"

Harry, Ron and Hermione all looked at eachother mid-sex. Harry and Ron both had their penis' jammed in Hermione, their ballsacks rubbing against eachother's sexifully. (wtf? I have no idea.)

Harry- "Wanna join, bitch?"

Draco- "Fuck yes. Let's bang."

So they did.

FUCK THIS. DOWN TO HAGRID'S HUT.

There were two robes on the floor of Hagrid's hut. One pair was dark blueish purple. Lying near them was a pair of half-moon spectacles. A few feet away lay an overly large robe. It looked as though it belonged to a mother fucking giant. Well it didn't. He's a fucking half-giant, you fucking shit.

Albus Dumbledore lay on top of Hagrid, pating. His white beard was dripping with sweat, his old face screwed up in concentration.

DMB (Dumbledore, because that name's too fucking long) – "HAGIRDDDDDDD! YOUR PENIS IS SO FUCKING LARGE! IT WONT FIT INTO MY ASS. HOLY FUCK!"

I have no idea where this is going.

Fuck that.

One month later.

Every fucking woman in Hogwarts is pregnant (except the menstrual girls who didn't succeed in suicide.)

So every fucking man in Hogwarts shoots them. With a gun. Yeah. Don't question me. If I want guns in Hogwarts, then theres gun in Hogwarts. Get the fuck over it, wimp.

And there's my fucking story. All about fucking. FUCK.