Letting Go
by Criminally Charmed
I absolutely, positively, do not own the Thunderbirds. Nor do I own the Song "Letting Go" by Suzy Boggus. I am guilty of changing a few words of the song (changing gender mainly). And I apologize in advance if I make anyone cry. I may not write death fics but I am guilty of writing tear jerkers combined with laughter - kinda like life itself.
Alan Tracy and his wife, Tin-Tin were going over their possessions one more time. After they returned from their honeymoon, the couple had gone with their parents to Boston to set everything up at the condo they were borrowing from his sister-in-law, Sarah. They now only had to bring a bag apiece with them. Tin-Tin smiled up at her husband. "Everything you'll need either packed or already in Boston?"
Looking around, he nodded. "Let's see, my car – finally running – is in the garage under the condo; most clothing, especially, winter clothing is already in the closets of the condo; my laptop is right there and we can't get our books until we go there tomorrow. Oh, and I have a beautiful, sexy, wonderful girl in mind to live with me." Tin-Tin reached up and went to kiss Alan when he said, "Think I should give her a call?" Tin-Tin smacked her husband's arm and he pulled her into an embrace, laughing as he kissed her. "How soon did your mother say dinner would be ready?"
Grinning at her husband, Tin-Tin leaned in closer to him, running her hands over her husband's form. "Oh, not for at least thirty minutes; do you have any ideas how you would like to spend the time before the family dinner your father has called?"
Alan kissed his wife. "Our families can have the rest of the evening and we have to leave early tomorrow morning. As I have heard John phrase it to Em: Wanna take a "nap"?"
Returning her kiss, Tin-Tin smiled. "I thought you'd never ask." As she deepened her embrace, the young bride hoped she was succeeding in distracting Alan from his fears. He really was scared about being on his own. Even with them living in the same place, this would be so different from when he would be sent off to boarding school. This was leaving childhood behind, once and for all.
TBTBTBTBTBTBTBTBTB
Jeff Tracy sat at the desk in his office on Tracy Island. He wanted to have his evening free to spend with his family. He could stay up later to do the reports – he didn't seem to be getting much done now anyways. The family had furbished one of the smaller jets so that Alan could fly it to Boston without family picking him up and dropping him off. Of course Tin-Tin would fly back and forth with him, but on certain school breaks he would be picking up Fermat in California as well. Summer and Christmas breaks would pretty much match up for the three schools, but Fermat's Spring Break from Cal-Sci was off from when Alan's from Harvard or Tin-Tin's from MIT was. The kids would miss that.
Just then, a soft beeping noise announced an incoming message from Thunderbird Five. Turning on the device, he saw the smiling face of his other blond son. "Hey, Dad, calling in to tell you everything looks good up here. You guys should be able to enjoy a quiet family dinner with no interruptions."
Jeff laughed. "When did the Tracys ever have a quiet family dinner?"
John watched his father with concern. "So are you ready to let go?"
Tilting his head at his second son, Jeff replied. "John, Alan has graduated from high school and is married now. What makes you think I haven't already let go?" As John simple continued to watch him, the blue eyes so like his baby brother's, so like their late mother's gaze, Jeff sighed. "You would think that the fact that I have had eighteen years to get ready for this day would make it easier. I should be past it, but I'm not. He's my baby and I really do have to let go now don't I?"
"Well Dad," John mused, "think how lucky you are. We got Alan interested in writing and he has a good future in that as well as working for either family business – his interest in engineering assures that. Do you know what Alan had always wanted to do before that?" Jeff shook his head, unsure if he wanted to know that answer. "Race car driving. Scott and I have both taken him to test tracks, and I am sure he has gotten to a few more on his owns. You should see the kid, Dad. He's a natural – smooth touch and great instincts. But with his writing, college and marriage, he feels he won't have time to pursue the racing interest."
Jeff sighed, leaning his head back as relief washed over him. Now he was relieved he had agreed to Alan's marriage to Tin-Tin as he suspected that was the biggest reason Alan turned his back on race car driving. Smiling at John, he could understand Alan's love for Thunderbird Three and his fascination with One – the boy had a need for speed. But with Tin-Tin watching over her husband, Jeff felt safer about letting the boy out on his own. Yet it wasn't easy to let go.
He'll take the painting in the hallway, He's had 18 years to get ready for this day
The one he did in junior high
And that old lamp up in the attic,
He'll need some light to study by.
He should be past the tears, he cries some anyway
Brains watched as Fermat finished up with his latest experiment. Tomorrow, Fermat would get on board a small plane and Alan would take the only Hackenbacker child to Cal-Sci College in LA County. He knew it was for the best. Fermat was smart enough to be accepted at any college in the world. But thanks to the encouragement of the oldest Tracy daughter-in-law, Katherine Eppes Tracy, his son had applied and been accepted for the accelerated program at the high tech college that her uncle, aunt and cousin were all professors at. In fact, at Charlie Eppes encouragement, Fermat would be living in the late Grandpa Eppes' in-law apartment. Brains was relieved at that turn of events. His son may have been brilliant, but he was still only sixteen. The Eppes were delighted to help, saying "anything for family." When the Hackenbackers tried to protest, saying they were not kin to the Eppes, Charlie simply smiled. "Katie is our family and you are part of hers. So, you are family."
Fermat looked over at his father. "D-Dad?" When he was sure he had his father's attention, he said, "I am gl-glad we t-took all th-those v-vacations up on Five. We c-can st-still do th-that sometimes, right? J-just you and me t-time?" Brains nodded, a lump in his throat. "Dad? Are you s-sure I am ready to do this?"
Brains smiled at his only child and pulled his son in for a fierce hug. "Y-yes, F-Fermat, you are ready. The q-q-q-question is, am I?"
Oh letting go
There's nothing in the way now,
Oh letting go, there's room enough to fly
And even though, he's spent his whole life waiting,
It's never easy letting go.
Onaha watched over the family gathered at the table. When John was up on Thunderbird Five, it was not uncommon for his wife, Emily and their daughter Elizabeth to join the table at the main house or even to share meals with the other married Tracy sons' households. But for now, every resident of Tracy Island except John, currently on the space station, was gathered for dinner. It was a special night. Tomorrow morning, as the sun rose over the tropical paradise, her daughter, her baby, her only child Tin-Tin was going away to college. To make matters worse, the other two children that Onaha had mothered for the last eight years, Alan and Fermat, were leaving as well. It had always been hard to send the two boys away to school, but at least she had always had the comfort of her beautiful daughter. Even when Tin-Tin had married back in June, her child had only moved to the main villa. Every meal, Tin-Tin was still there, helping her mother as she always had. But now, now it would all change.
Emily watched indulgently as her daughter was passed around the table. Alan finally secured his niece in his lap, and between bites of his own meal, gently fed the first girl born into the Tracy Family in two centuries. Quietly, the young doctor rose from the table and approached Onaha. "Onaha, are you coming to eat now?"
Smiling at the other woman, Onaha sighed deeply. "You would think I would be ready, there are so many things I would like the chance to do. Kyrano and I would like to remodel our daughter's old room, make a small study. I have so many projects I never found the time for. Kyrano has books he has kept setting aside for when he has time. We have always said we need more time as a couple. Now the time we always managed to earmark for Tin-Tin has been freed up. I should be looking at this as an opportunity, I should be ready for this and yet…"
Placing a comforting arm around the older woman's shoulder, Emily gently said, "I am glad you will miss your baby so much." At Onaha's puzzled look, she continued. "It means you love her and that she is important to you. Not all kids get that." Turning from the pity she saw in the housekeepers eyes, Emily motioned to all three of the college bound youths. "They are blessed. Because someone will miss them when they are gone, some one will be happy when they come back. And because you love them enough to let them go, they will come back."
Onaha nodded and began to ready the apple pie she had made for dessert. She knew she was still needed here and that her child would someday return to Tracy Island for good. But it would never be the same. And it wasn't easy to let go.
Mother sits down at the table
So many things she'd like to do
Spend more time out in the garden
Now she can get those books read too.
She's had 18 years to get ready for this day
She should be past the tears, she cries some anyway.
The sun had just begun to rise as Jeff made his way to the hanger. Alan had a radio playing as he checked everything was on board. Listening to comments on up and coming athletes, he asked his wife, "Tin, have you seen that new swimmer who just qualified for the women's team?"
"Alan Shepard Tracy, married six weeks and you are checking out other women?"
Blushing, Alan could hear Fermat snort with laughter as he came into the hanger, his father helping him with his bag. Ignoring his friend for the moment, Alan continued with his train of thought. "No, I noticed her eyes. They seem familiar, but I can't place them. Oh, well, it will come to me eventually." Turning to Fermat, he asked, "That everything?" At his friend's nod, he turned away as father and son hugged once more. As Fermat climbed into the small plane, Alan said softly, "The Eppes will look out for him, it will be OK; they consider the Tracys an extension of their family and you two are family to us." Brains nodded tightly before hugging Alan as well. Touching one side of the blonde's face gently, Brains whispered, "I c-couldn't h-have loved you m-more if you were my own ch-child, you know. Th-thank you for all you have d-done and been for F-Fermat."
Alan nodded. "And take care of my dad for me, hey Brains? I mean, I know this is hard for him, just don't let him push himself too hard. And don't keep yourself locked up in the lab all the time. I guess I just…" Alan's train of thought wandered off as he saw his father watching him. Brains nodded and moved to help Tin-Tin check on the luggage. Alan swallowed hard as his father came to stand in front of him.
"I'll make you proud, Dad."
"You already do."
"I'll miss you, all of you."
"And we'll miss you. Take care of yourself. No more fires, viral infections or the like. We need you back, no matter how much we have to share you."
Smiling at his father's words, Alan nodded. He tried to say something more but the lump in his throat made it impossible. Instead, he prayed silently as he hugged his father close. "Take care of them, Mom. Keep a watch over them."
Hugging his baby boy close to his heart, Jeff knew he would have to break the connection for Alan's flight plan to remain on time. But it was so hard. "Oh, Lucy, what would you be doing at this moment?"
"Same as you, Rocket Man; only you would be the tough guy and would be pulling me away from our baby. He has his wings; it is time for us to let him soar."
Stepping back from his son, Jeff walked out of the hanger as Alan climbed into the small plane and began his take-off. It was time for the youngest Thunderbirds to leave the nest.
Oh oh letting go
There's nothing in the way now,
Oh letting go, there's room enough to fly
And even though, she's spent her whole life waiting,
It's never easy letting go.
Scott Tracy was never big on sleep. So it did not surprise his wife Kate to wake up in the early morning hours to find herself alone in bed. What did surprise her was that her son Jason was not in his nursery. Heading out to the shared patio area that made up the three older Tracy brothers front yard, she found her missing men.
"See that plane, Jas? Your Uncle Allie is on that plane. He is going away but he'll come back." Kate was about to approach her husband when she saw the tears trailing down his face. The field commander of the Thunderbirds buried his face in his toddler's tiny form. "He'll come back. My little boy promised he'll come back." Holding out his son, he smiled through his tears. "Hopefully, this will be easier for me when it is time for you to go." As the fifteen-month-old patted his father's cheeks, wiping at his tears, the oldest Tracy son hugged his child closer.
"But I doubt it."
Oh oh letting go
There's nothing in the way now,
Oh letting go, there's room enough to fly
And even though, she's spent her whole life waiting,
It's never easy letting go
a/n - Growing up and letting go are never easy, but I hope the Tracys have done it well. I am going to be working on giving the Hackenbackers a short story. This may be a bit hard, so don't expect it for about a week. Once that plot bunny is stuffed and roasted, I can work on Gordy's story. The next time we meet, eith the hackenbackers, it will be about two years into the future. Fermat will still be at Cal-Sci, Tin-Tin at MIT and Alan will be alive and well at Harvard. Yes, blondie will have enjoyed two years of accident free good health. And since he is not featured in the next story, you know he is OK then as well. However, he will be featured in Gordy's story. I think three or four years is long enough to keep him safe, don't you? I am NOT EVIL - stop saying that!!!