This is the first story I've ever decided to post on Fanfiction, but I do read many stories here and I thought I might as well try. I hope that you guys like it! When I finished the books, I was both happy and sad at the same time, ("I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.") and even though I am completely in love and satisfied with the way Allegiant ended, I could not help but let my mind wander. So here are the results of my post-divergent crisis.
Enjoy!
"He had seen her body, cold and motionless. It was impossible for her to be alive after so many years. Her words were foreign and her eyes distant. She was another person. Yet, when he reached for her, she felt the same."
He chooses her.
After countless of days became nights, green leaves turned brown, bodies started to wither. Everything was the way it supposed to be: right. And he was aware that he had more than enough to feel that way. But he did not have her. His own body had started to show the effects of the passing time. He had lost every trait that could have resembled a boy. He had changed, inside and out, and the world changed along with him. But she never did. After all, she was a part of him. She had said that she did not want to leave him, and she never completely did. Her image remained intact in the back of his head, emerging occasionally when he needed her the most.
He remembered her saying, "Are you afraid of me, too, Tobias?" He always was. Afraid of how such an overwhelming feeling could inhabit within him. It warmed him up inside in ways no other being possibly could. It endlessly startled him, every time his heart would rapidly beat by the mere thought of her. He could still see her. The way her hair, almost reaching her shoulders, turned gold against the sunrays. How every time she jumped off that train, it moved gracefully behind her. Her big blue eyes were full with excitement; it was almost palpable how Dauntless she was. He remembered perfectly how strong her body was when pressed against his and the taste of her lips whenever they kissed. He could precisely describe a thousand details on her body, because she was his. When he first saw her, he thought that there was just something about her. It intrigued him but he could not pinpoint it. Later on, he found that it was not just something. It was everything about her.
During his childhood, he found the concept of love absolutely ridiculous. This idea was only reaffirmed as he joined Dauntless. Love seemed to be some pathetic idea Amity used to keep peace. He learned, however, that he was far from right. Love set him on fire; her touch made him feel free. He would give his life for her, yet he was never more alive. Jumping off trains and buildings, shooting guns and protecting others, could be easily categorized as Dauntless. But he knew, he was at his bravest when he was next to her. Being in love with her made him more Dauntless than any training ever did. For that, he was thankful.
The first year after the incident, while the city was adjusting to the new changes, he tried desperately everyday to adjust as well. Not only to the way society was changing, but to the emptiness that haunted him. He had to adjust, but he failed. It was killing him inside to know that he had lost her forever. He wanted to be furious, to yell at her for doing something so incredibly stupid. It was impossible to get rid of that feeling. She did not want to leave him and he understood why she did. She was just selfless like that. But the fact that he understood, did not mean it took any of his pain away. He spent most of his days releasing his frustrations against punching bags and most of his nights in his fear landscape. Because it was the only way to see her. He crossed the limit of obsessiveness and it was tearing him apart. After ending up crying every single time, and with knuckles colored with a mixed of purple and red, he decided it was enough.
He went on with his life and avoided thinking of her longer than necessary. And he noticed that it eventually stopped hurting as much. But she was there, deep inside. And he was certain that no matter how many years passed, she would never leave.
Today they gathered to keep each other company, just like every year. It was her birthday. It was not supposed to be a celebration or a memorial, since they would both require the people to show some kind of emotion, and this had none. It was more of an acknowledgement among the group; a silent 'I understand'. Even though they had recovered from their loss as much as possible, each had a piece of them taken away by war. Pieces, which could not be replaced; the names of those who were absent were rarely mentioned. They preferred to mourn together, but as the years passes, the mourning turned into longing and eventually to happiness. To an observer, they would seem just like friends hanging out.
"...It was completely useless!" said Christina as she passed the bottle to the person on her right. That was what they always did: they picked a day, they drank, they told stories to help distract themselves from the memories that this day brought. Christina moved her hands in exasperation as she continued to tell her story.
Shauna who seemed to be rolling his eyes at each of her sentences, raised her hand like a children in class would, and intervened "As much as I would like to continue hearing your interesting shopping adventures... You know what? I don't," Christina scoffed at her comment and the rest of the group shared a laugh.
The door to Christina's apartment opened all of sudden, showing Zeke running through it. His tone was not his usual teasing, but a serious one. He furrowed his eyebrows as he spoke, "There is something going on. Something bad." He placed his hands on his thighs while he recovered his breath.
Meanwhile, all eyes turned to Tobias searching for some kind of affirmation "Nothing has been reported", he promised. He would have known if anything had happened inside the city. He worked in the government, after all. But he could not help still feel a bit of panic building inside of him. The city had been at peace for too long, but if history had taught him something is that when you least expect it, that peace crumbles down. The group relaxed a bit at his words, but they were still alerted by Zeke's concerned face.
"There some kind of mess in the headquarters," Zeke continued to explain his discovery, "Today, I overheard a conversation between Amar and another official about some kind of group making their way into the city." Caleb, Christina, Cara and Shauna were still curious about the story, as they could not understand why such an event would be anything out of the ordinary. They motioned with their hands for him to keep going, "Apparently they walked right through the fence, fully armed and they were never even detected. They requested a meeting with Johanna."
"How is that possible?" Shauna and Christina agreed.
The group was quiet for a while, considering the options. It was not really impossible, just extremely hard. Yes, everyone was welcomed in the city. But at the moment of arrival, they were inspected. They knew every single person who entered or left the place. Security measures in case someone was trying to disturb the peace. Sounded like some kind of Amity speech. Figures. Cara, who seemed to be analyzing every possibility about this new event, wondered out loud, "Who could possibly know the city well enough to walk past our security system completely unnoticed?". Suddenly the realization hit him and Tobias felt his anger run through his veins. He knew who they were, or at least he had an idea, but he could not bring himself to say it. As he looked around, he noticed that the others had guessed as well.
"Yes, Four," Zeke was the first to break the silence, "They are from the Bureau."
Tobias ran through the sea of people gathering along the hallway and towards the room, with his friends following behind. He felt his whole body tense as he remembered being interrogated in front of a crowd in the former Candor Headquarters. He could feel the weight of the truth in his throat, just like that day. It's all in your head, he reminded himself. As he reached the front, he could see about seven people in the middle. The spectators kept their distance from the unknown group and Johanna stood in the front. Apart from the government officials, the room was full with armed men, pointing their guns at the group in the middle, waiting for Johanna to give an order.
The people in the middle were dressed in black clothing from head to toe, with masks to match, which covered every characteristic of their face. Only their eyes were visible. They had guns as well, but they were not holding them. In fact, their guns hung lazily to their sides. They must have been very sure of themselves. There was just someone in the front dressed normally. Since he could only see their backs, he moved towards Johanna. And he could finally recognize her. His curiosity transformed into blinding rage. He felt his feet drag him towards the female figure. He was going to kill her. He wanted to.
"Four!" he heard someone call. Christina and Zeke held him back, while he struggled to release himself. He felt desperate to get his hands around her neck.
The people in the room noticed the small scene he had caused. The dark haired woman also turned, "Ah, Tobias Eaton," Zoe acknowledged him with a nod. The former member of The Bureau was there, someone who had seemed so innocent back then. But now, all he could of was that she was also guilty for her death. "I was certain you would make quite an entrance," she smiled. But her smile, which reminded him of the Erudites, did not reach her eyes. "You did not disappoint," she added.
Tobias collected himself and tried to articulate despite his confusion and anger, "You were supposed to be―"
"Your girlfriend's plan was very effective, yes. Impressively astute, even." Zoe inhaled deeply as if trying to contain more words. She seemed angry for a moment, if someone this robotic could have feelings. But then she stared into the space, "And the procedure, absolutely astonishing." She was lost in her thoughts for a second, exploring the events that had happened years ago. This was the kind of curiosity that could be found in Jeanine's eyes, and it sent a shudder down his spine. "A complex organization such as The Bureau of Genetic Welfare, would take its precautions. Don't you agree? Years of research could never vanish, because they will remain here." She pressed the tip of index finger against her temple. She continued, "Nevertheless, we gave our lives for this work. Now, it is time to take it ba―"
"I am afraid that you are in no position to demand anything", Johanna interrupted with her head held high, and her scarred face completely unrelenting. A proud trait, that years ago, would have not belonged to an Amity. But times have changed. Johanna continued, "And we do negotiate with people such as yourself."
"Ah," Zoe laughed lightly, "Quite the opposite." Zoe started to pace around her black-dressed companions, with her hands behind her back. She looked at Johanna straight in the eye, "You are not foolish enough to believe I would pay a visit to people who want my head, without some kind of insurance. You do not strike me as fool."
"There is nothing you could possibly offer me, I am sure." Johanna countered sternly. And with a swift move of her hand, dozens of armed men pointed their guns at the intruders. Zoe seemed to be unaffected by the threat, and copied Johanna's hand movement. Subsequently, five of her followers raised their guns and aimed, but strangely, at one of their own. Five guns were aimed towards a body in the middle. This person remained still.
"But there is something I can offer him," She gestured towards Tobias and grinned. She moved towards the body in the middle, which was fairly smaller than the rest. It was a woman, he could tell. As Zoe stood in front of it, the woman raised her gun as well. He expected her to aim it at Zoe, or at Johanna. Anyone, actually. But she followed her companions actions and pointed it towards herself. She placed the gun under her chin. The crowd was confused and no one dared to move. It seemed like the whole room held their breath, not knowing what to expect. Tobias did not understand what was happening, yet he could feel his heart banging loudly against his chest. Zoe reached for the woman's mask, and threw it on the floor. Blond curtains followed immediately after, as Zoe encouraged, "Do not be shy, Tris," and blue eyes met.