A/N: I apologize for any and all american expressions that might appear in the text. I tried.
Levi Ackerman sat in front of the fireplace in the Gryffindor common room, curled up into his boyfriend Eren Jaeger's side, angrily complaining about the predicament he got himself into. "...and so the shithead told me he would tell the bloody house head where exactly I've been sneaking off to unless I agreed to play in the next game. I fucking hate Quidditch. I'd send him to go eat shit, maybe even hex him for even suggesting that, but hell, he was serious about being a bloody snitch and I really don't feel like detention every night until the end of the fucking year."
Eren was struggling not to laugh at the passionate rant and the faces his sister, Mikasa, was making over it. "But, Levi, you're so good, I can totally see why the team is so desperate to get you play at least one game," he reasoned, squeezing his deceivingly small, strong boyfriend tighter.
"Wrong, Eren, wrong," the other scowled. "I'm a genius at it. Doesn't change the fact I fucking hate it."
"Right. Sorry."
Levi was about to scold him for laughing at him but was interrupted by the portrait swinging open, letting inside a trio of first years. The forth years wouldn't even notice if it weren't for the fact it was The Trio, or Harry Potter and his two sidekicks. The kid was famous and new and so the school still wasn't used to seeing him, especially when he appeared out of nowhere like this, which meant every head turned to look where ever he went and that was distracting. Levi rolled his eyes when he saw what the commotion was about. Honestly, he didn't give a darn about the kid. He understood he was a big deal and all that but Levi being muggle-born, he just didn't feel the hype.
His ears perked up when the three got closer to their cosy-slash-angry snuggle fest. They were talking loudly, not exactly using their inside voices and Levi was about to snap at them to be quieter, when he registered what they were talking about.
"Seriously, I swear Snape hates me," complained Potter in a butthurt tone.
"Oh, Harry, I don't think so," scoffed the overly righteous irritant of a girl. Levi wanted to smack her every time he saw her acting like she knew better then everyone, even than the older, much older students. "He's that way to everyone but the Slytherins."
"You gotta admit he's worse towards, Harry, though," said the third nameless and faceless one. Levi liked this one best.
"Well, yes, but I don't think he hates him." Levi rolled his eyes. Of course he did hate him. Snape hated everyone. That was just general knowledge.
"I don't know what his problem is," Potter whined again. "All of Slytherin, too. I don't know; the whole house seems to hate me for some reason." Well, that was bullshit. Levi knew there were as many fans of the brat in Slytherin as in the other houses.
These three seemed so biased.
"Don't worry about those snakes, Harry. They are all just evil, cunning, untrustworthy idiots who can't see beyond their own ego."
"Yeah, Harry, they're just a bunch of slimy bastards. They're not worth you even looking at them."
Levi, Eren, Mikasa and even Armin, who was until then completely engrossed in his book and didn't seem to notice anything around him, exchanged glances.
They were silent for a while before they burst out laughing.
Mikasa then said with a smirk, "Well, they weren't wrong."
Levi gave her a look.
Levi was sitting in the library slaving over a charms essay, when he heard The Banshee Screech. "Leeeeeviiiiiiii~ Are you there?" He could hear her even from the hallway.
His head dropped to bang against the table and he groaned just as the door burst open and the stern voice of Madam Pince carried over to him, her annoyance with the girl obvious only from the volume of her voice, not to mention her tone. "How many times do I have to tell you to be quiet in the library, Miss Zoe? I swear I'm going to ban you from here if you do not stop making racket here!"
"Sorry, sorry, Ma'am; I'll be quick," he heard the Ravenclaw sing. Levi thought to himself that all three of them had to know the threat was unlikely to work for longer than five minutes.
Levi still hadn't raised his head, trying to find the energy he needed to deal with the Banshee, as listened to her coming closer and closer, asking students whether they saw him.
"Hay, young Lady, haven't you seen Levi? Short, angry, mean, says 'shit' every ten seconds?" Levi scowled internally. He didn't swear that much. Did he?
"Oh, umm, I think I saw him back in the charms section?" came a vaguely familiar, mildly scared female voice; he didn't blame the girl for being scared as Hanji could be... a shock at first. After a second, Levi identified the voice as Potter's annoying girl-side-kick.
"Great, thanks!" Hanji said happily before pausing. "That's a curious combination of books, by the way. What are you studying for?"
"Well, I'm just looking for something. Nicolas Flamel, I can't remember who he is?" she sounded hopeful, maybe thinking Hanji would be able to help her.
"Sorry, don't know him. Good luck looking, though! And thanks again!"
Levi wondered who that could be for Hanji not to know. Probably no researcher of any kind as Hanji seemed to know about every single research ever done on anything.
He sighed when he heard her skipping around the corner, finally sitting up and pulling out his wand to magically bookmark his page. And was he glad he did so. Hanji jumped up to sit on his table, throwing half the things on the floor, because she just couldn't sit in a chair like a normal person. Levi gave her his best scowl as he waved his wand, muttering a simple charm, to return everything on the table in a neat pile.
However, his scowl was met only with her pony tail. Hanji wasn't looking at him, instead staring back the way she came, holding her chin thoughtfully. "I wonder why that girl is searching for philosopher's stone," she muttered under her breath and if she wasn't sitting right above Levi, he wouldn't have heard her.
"Are you telling me," Levi said sharply, bringing her attention to himself, "you knew who the guy was but didn't tell her? Sound's kind of Slytherin if you ask me," he sneered.
Hanji grinned broadly. "Nope, it's a Ravenclaw thing. She can learn a lot by looking herself!" she announced cheerily and Levi rolled his eyes. Still sounded Slytherin to him.
"Whatever. What do you want?" he bit out, maybe a bit too snappy. What could he say; he already spent too much time on this stupid essay.
Hanji didn't seem affected, however. "Oh, yeah. I little birdie told me someone was going to play in the next game?" her eyes were dancing with mirth and Levi felt the urge to gouge her eyes out with his stupid quill. Seriously, it was the twentieth century. Why the hell did they have to write with quills? Has this school never heard about a ballpoint pen?
He reminded himself he would have to re-write the whole thing if he got blood on the parchment and took a deep breath to calm down. Then he growled back at her, "I had no choice. I don't fancy detentions."
"Because then you'd spend less time with Eren?" she cackled and Levi started weighing pros and cons of submitting a blood stained essay. "Anyway, I was by the lake talking with Moby-Dick," Levi didn't even want to know how she 'talked' with the Giant bloody Squid, "and saw your Quidditch team going to the pitch for a practice."
He raised an eyebrow at her. "Your point?"
"My point? My point is, what are you doing in the library, Levi Ackerman? You should be on the pitch!"
Levi raised his other eyebrow as well. "Why is that," he deadpanned.
"Because," she huffed in response, "you agreed to play."
"Yes. Play in one game. There wasn't a single word about any practice in the deal. What is it to you anyway; you should be against our team."
"I have good money running on your contribution-"
"Proud Ravenclaw, indeed," the raven haired boy snorted to himself.
"-and if I lose it because you were too proud to go to a single practice..." she let her sentence fade out.
Now he just felt offended and his eyes narrowed. "Are you doubting me, you bloody banshee?"
"Of course not. But you haven't played since second year."
"I don't fucking need it," he positively snarled at her, sparks flying out from the tip of his wand and Hanji admitted defeat, leaving Levi alone to finish his essay.
The further behind she was leaving the library, the wider her grin was becoming.
Around the corner she ran into Eren. The Gryffindor was leaning against the wall, obviously waiting for her. "How did it go?"
Hanji gave him a thumbs-up and Eren grinned. Levi was fired up now, sworn to prove he didn't need training and so would be taking the game seriously, not dicking around and avoiding the action. Hanji and Eren could relax now. They wouldn't be losing their money anytime soon.
Hanji Zoe spent her Halloween night bemoaning the fact she didn't manage to get away from the prefects to go looking for a troll that somehow or other managed to get into the castle.
The day of the fateful Gryffindor versus Slytherin game arrived with a grumpy, unwilling Levi, who was dragged by his boyfriend towards the pitch by the hand.
"I still don't understand why you don't like the game," Eren wondered, glancing over his shoulder, where Levi was a step behind him. "You love flying."
Levi shrugged. "Flying is free. I don't have to go back and forth chasing a stupid ball with a bunch of idiots," he growled, expressing his distaste. "And if you hadn't noticed I'm not exactly a team player."
Eren laughed because five minutes in Levi's presence was enough to realize that fact. "Well, it's just one game. Try your best out there just this once, okay? For me?" he added sweetly, batting his eyelashes.
Levi stared at him for a few moments, before narrowing his eyes. "You fucking bet on me, too, didn't you."
Eren's cute facade fell as he grinned cheekily. "What can I say, there was a good rate going for you; I can earn a lot of money if you beat Mikasa in points scored. So be good and don't disappoint me, love. Or I'll demand a refund from you." He winked and Levi scowled harder.
"Tell Armin I demand at least 30% of his earnings."
Eren laughed hard, stopping to give Levi a small, fond kiss. "I'll tell him, but you will have to do the negotiations yourselves. He's my very cute best friend and I don't want to be on the receiving end of his evil and destroy my image of him."
"Coward," Levi said, giving a kiss of his own. "And here I was led to believe Gryffindors were brave."
"I'm dating you; I think that's brave enough, wouldn't you agree?" Eren muttered quietly, stepping closer to his small boyfriend, grabbing his other hand as well, pulling gently.
Suddenly, Eren felt sharp pain. "Ow," he exclaimed, jumping away from Levi to clutch at his head.
Levi looked behind him to be faced with Mikasa, scowling and holding her broom like a sword. "Stop flirting and get going. You're blocking the entrance."
Only when she said it did Levi realize they indeed stopped just in front of the entrance to the pitch and there was a small crowd of people waiting to get in, all of them blushing and looking anywhere but them.
Levi gave them all an impassive, unreadable look and watched them all get redder, only Mikasa rolling her eyes, stepping forward and grabbing her brother's collar to drag him inside so he stopped blocking her way. Before she disappeared towards the changing rooms, she shot Levi a cold look. "I won't let you win."
Levi snorted. "You wish!" he called after her, smirking when her only response was a middle finger.
It took Eren and Levi ten more minutes to separate, Levi heading to the changing room and Eren to the stands with a grin.
He found his overly big group of friends, sitting in his saved set beside Armin, who was sitting strategically by the stairs so people could easily make last minute bets, his enchanted little piggy bank floating in front of him, his bookmaker's book on his lap. He was smiling in satisfaction, shooting Eren a sly glance. "Levi should play more often; he's making me good money."
Eren grinned back. "I hope he's making good money for me, too," he paused to stretch before continuing. "By the way, he wants thirty per cent."
Armin's grin disappeared immediately, replaced by a calculating look. "Fifteen."
Eren scowled right back. "I refuse to do this with you, talk with him yourself."
Armin huffed just as the commentary started. "Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the long awaited Gryffindor versus Slytherin match! And is this a special one! The first match of the famous Harry Potter as the Gryffindor Seeker! The first first year in over a hundred years to become a part of one of the Quidditch teams! Moreover, today is also the great comeback of the genius Chaser, Levi Ackerman! It's going to be a big event today! A famous premiere! A direct showdown between Ackerman and Mikasa Jaeger! By the way, if you haven't bet on the result yet, you can still do so; Armin informed me he's accepting customers up until the official start of the match, so hurry on up."
At this announcement, several people got up and made a mad dash towards Armin's make-shift booth. McGonagall's lips tightened into a thin line but she couldn't really do anything as Dumbledore was actually participating in this ridiculousness and forbade her from interfering with Mr Arlert's 'business' two years ago. She bitterly wondered how much money he was getting from the boy.
"And now... let's welcome the teams!"
A round of deafening cheers erupted around the pitch as the Gryffindor and Slytherin teams exited their respective changing rooms. Eren chuckled when he noticed Levi was still disgruntledly fastening his uniform. He felt a nudge from Reiner who sat beside him on the other side than Armin. "How late did you make him?"
Eren had the decency to blush. "It wasn't my fault; he was too cute, complaining how much he didn't want to do this!"
"Wait, Ackerman's a bloody Slytherin?!" came a shocked cry from behind. Eren turned around curiously to see a group of highly shocked Gryffindor first years holding a 'Potter for President' banner. Had to be Harry Potter's friends.
Eren identified the speaker as the youngest Weasley sibling, affirming him that indeed, those were Harry Potter's friends. He was gaping, his face turning a slightly unhealthy red. Eren heard Reiner laugh and Armin chuckle and from the corner of his eye he thought he saw even Ymir smirk.
He himself only raised an eyebrow at the kids, asking loudly, challengingly, "Yes, he is a Slytherin. Is that a problem?"
Several eyes turned to look at him, shock and betrayal still prominent in them. "But-but... He practically lives in our common room!" came a protesting shout from one of the girls.
"And? So he thinks ours is more cosy, so what?"
"But he's not a Gryffindor!"
"I practically live there and I'm not a Gryffindor either," Armin noted cheerfully, flashing his scarf in the colours of the Ravenclaw house after closing one of the last minute transactions, not looking up from taking a note of it in his book. He earned more of the loud protests.
Reiner laughed harder.
"Get out of the Gryffindor stands if you are from a different house!" came a desperate cry from one of the misguided first years.
Eren's group of friends exchanged glances, shrugging. The mature voice of Erwin Smith announced, "We don't want to fight; come on, kids, we're leaving."
Ymir sneered. "No way, the Slytherin section is on the opposite side; no way can I be bothered to move there. And you aren't going anywhere either, my dear sweet Krista," she added, grabbing her girlfriend's arm before she could get up.
Krista scowled at her. "But Erwin's right, we shouldn't cause problems."
"They are the ones causing problems. We are just here to be close to our winnings once Mikasa kicks Levi's arse."
"Not happening!" sang Hanji, already halfway down the aisle.
The girls ignored her. "But we are the Slytherins, Ymir. We would get the blame and you know that."
Eren shook his head. He would never understand how sweet, sweet, kind, and understanding Krista ended up in Slytherin of all houses. Though her smile did seem a bit too overdone and fake sometimes, and she was dating Ymir, so he supposed there had to be a good reason.
Eren glanced up at the first years, who were gaping again. "Just how many of you are actually Gryffindors?!" someone squeaked.
Hanji did a quick headcount. "Three Gryffindors," she pointed at Eren, Reiner and Jean, "three Ravenclaws," herself, Moblit and Armin, "four Hufflepuffs," Marco, Bertholt, Sasha and Connie, "and four Slytherins," she finished in satisfaction, gesturing at Erwin, Ymir, Krista and Annie. "There are four more Gryffindors and two Ravenclaws, but Petra and the rest are in the Slytherin section fangirling over Levi, and Mike and Nanaba are on a date in the castle somewhere." She grinned broadly, proud of her diverse group of friends.
"You forgot Farlan and Izzy making out down there," Eren pointed towards the bottommost row of seats where the two were all over each other with everyone steering far away from them.
"Darn," Hanji said, snapping her fingers. "That's one more Gryffindor and one more Slytherin. There's just too many of us when we join up," she sighed before flashing a bright smile up at the eleven, twelve years olds. "You just need to grow up, kids," she said with finality, flopping back down on her seat as the match started, unwilling to miss a second of her cute Levi playing unhappily again.
Ron Weasley exchanged a look with his classmates, muttering to each other how weird these people were. They would keep away from them from now on.
As the match went on, they had no more conflicts with the narrow-minded children and so they could get deeper and deeper into the happenings on the pitch. Eren had to laugh at how both Levi and Mikasa ended up pretty much ignoring the rests of their teams, turning the game into this weird one on one with extras sometimes blocking their way. They were taking this too seriously, Eren thought, although they were both very proud people and there was pride on the line.
Next to him, Armin was dutifully taking notes on who scored the first goal, who was the first one to be hit by a Bludger and so on, so he would be able to distribute people's winnings correctly. Of course, he was also keeping score on the Ackerman versus Jaeger mini-match. Eren peaked over his shoulder to see Levi was currently three goals in the lead.
He was cheering as Mikasa scored a goal – he bet on Levi but Mikasa was still his beloved sister and he did kind of wish for her to win – when a mumble from Hagrid reached his ears, "Dunno what Harry thinks he's doing. If I didn' know better, I'd say he'd lost control of his broom ... but he can't have ..."
Eren looked up and saw that their miracle seeker was really barely hanging onto his broom as it jerked around like it was trying to throw him off. Eren frowned in confusion. Brooms didn't do stuff like that by themselves. Especially not brand new, expensive ones as was obviously the one Potter was riding.
Then a gasp. "I knew it. Snape – look." A pause. "He's doing something – jinxing the broom." Eren's frown deepened. He really doubted if Snape wanted to kill someone, he'd be so stupid as to do so in front of pretty much the whole school. He was more the type to slip them a slow killing poison or something. Not... cursing a broom.
There was some mumbling behind him and he watched the girl from Potter's trio running off somewhere. He exchanged a look with Armin who only shrugged before turning his attention back to the drama above the pitch, biting his lip nervously.
They watched in horror for a few more minutes, praying the Boy-who-lived wouldn't die in a stupid way like falling off a broom. But then suddenly a flash looking suspiciously like fire caught their eyes and the jerking of Potter's broom stopped. Then, for some reason, he was speeding toward ground quickly, coughing up the Snitch as soon as he hit the ground. Everyone blinked a few times in shock, Eren and Armin glancing towards where the flash came from earlier. They could barely make out Quirrell picking himself up heavily and Snape looking around in poker-faced confusion. They exchanged glances again, staring at each other in silence before Armin opened his mouth, "I didn't have any bets running for that."
Eren snorted at his best friend. "A crazy broom, Snape mysteriously catching on fire or Potter swallowing the Snitch?" he asked in amusement.
Armin grinned, shaking his head. "Neither." He glanced down where Potter was now celebrated by his team, safe for Mikasa who was still sending death glares Levi's way. Levi was halfway across the pitch already, uninterested and ready to be gone and away from this cursed game, however, not paying Mikasa any more attention. "Glad he's okay," Armin added kindly.
Eren nodded before crowding Armin, eager to find out whether he'd be getting a bunch of money or favours from Levi. Honestly, it was win-win for him. "Anyway, who won?"
Armin blinked, confused for a few seconds, before letting out an 'oh' and glancing down at his notes. "Levi, by one goal. Wow, that was close," he muttered to himself, impressed. Honestly, he thought whoever won, it would be by more than one stupid throw. Who knows who'd win if it weren't for the dramatic distraction.
That evening Armin stayed in his own house and Eren and Levi took refuge in the Slytherin common room since the celebrations of Quidditch success tended to get annoying within the Gryffindor house and Eren really wasn't in the mood for that, not to mention Levi.
Eren had to once again admit he fully understood why Levi learned to move to the Gryffindor common room. Slytherin, being in the dungeons, was dark and cold with an eerie, greenish glow, the only view being that of the deep waters of the lake. It was depressing. But they had the most comfortable chairs from all the houses. Probably to compensate them for the gloom.
They do the only sensible thing they can think of and as soon as Ymir sits down next to them and starts teasing to add to the dark atmosphere of the place, they move to Levi's bedroom. Eren doesn't return to his house that evening. Farlan spends breakfast next morning complaining about giggling love sick idiots who wouldn't let him sleep.
Moblit Berner had to forcefully drag Hanji Zoe away from the locked door in the right-hand third floor corridor at the last minute several times throughout the year – he'd rather have a sulking Hanji than a dead Hanji, thank you very much.
The rest of the year passed in blissful calm, just like any other school year. Levi continued spending time in the Gryffindor common room with Eren, since he worked for it with that one match, and Hanji kept skipping common rooms like she belonged to them all.
Armin welcomed the last day of school with distributing winnings from bets on the house cup. To no one's surprise Slytherin won again. And then the end-of-the-year feast came.
To say Armin was pissed at Dumbledore's low, dirty, blatantly favouritising, last-minute move would be an understatement. As he collected all the money back, recalculated and redistributed winnings again frantically, he internally cursed Dumbledore and swore to lace his two-per cent-share-worth-of muggle sweets with a laxative charm.
As celebrations at the Gryffindor table got more and more out of hand, Eren and Mikasa looked at each other, silently agreeing that this was bullshit. Sure, it was their house and everything but this move Dumbledore pulled was just not fair. They didn't know what exactly happened but they have noticed (or more like heard) that Potter was in the infirmary unconscious for three days straight and Professor Quirrell disappeared. It was obvious something happened but honestly, even if Potter defeated You-know-who all over again, he should have gotten an award or something not house points. Moreover, house points that were blatantly calculated in a way that Gryffindor narrowly won the House Cup. Seriously, fifty points for chess? Fifty points for thinking? Sixty points for courage, a basic characteristic for a Gryffindor? And the winner; ten points for standing up to your friends? Like all of them didn't stand up to Hanji on a daily basis... Sure, they failed most of the time but still...
Not to mention Armin looked partially like he was about to burst to tears and partially like he was out for blood. Without saying a word, the siblings got up simultaneously, leaving the celebration behind them. Mikasa headed towards the Ravenclaw table to help her blond best friend, if only by emitting her calm aura. Eren, on the other hand, strutted towards the Slytherins.
He walked to Levi, hugging his small form from behind and leaning over to kiss him hello upside-down. When he straightened up again, he asked softly, "Move over?"
Levi raised an eyebrow at him, pointedly looking around him as there were people sitting on both sides of him. "Where," he stated, not even bothering to make it a question.
Eren grinned in response and Levi was already narrowing his eyes suspiciously. "You could always just get up and sit on my la-" Eren was forced to stop before he finished by the force of the glare Levi was giving him, letting him know exactly what he thought about such a suggestion. "Or not?" he finished lamely, a faint blush appearing on his cheeks.
Quickly, Eren looked around and noticed the kid next to Levi was taking up way more space that he needed, being such a squirt. "Hey, could you move a bit so I can sit down?"
The kid with slicked back platinum hair, which looked pretty stupid if you asked Eren, looked up lazily before sneering, "Why should I? You're a bloody Gryffindor, there's no space for you here."
Eren's eyebrows shot up but before he could say anything, Levi spoke up easily in a light, entirely too light tone and a shiver ran up Eren's spine, "Oh, really?"
Eren was honestly too scared to look at his boyfriend so he didn't know what expression he was making exactly, but judging by the look on Erwin's face and by the speed with which the kid scrambled away, it was a good thing he didn't. Like this he only smiled brightly at the now terrified kid, thanking him in a fake sincere voice and sat down in the freed up space, giving Levi a proper kiss.
"Big bro's so cool," came a loud whisper from the other side of Levi and Eren leaned forward to give Isabel a look.
"I was wondering where you were. What are you doing here, Izzy; McGonagall said we have to sit at our own tables today."
"What are you doing here?" she shot back, a grin plastered on her face.
"Fair point," Eren sighed, straightening up and resting his chin in his hand. He glanced to his right where the kid was now trembling slightly and sitting as far away from them as he could get away with without looking like he was cowering. "What's up with the first years this year anyway? First our kids, now this? Do they think it's a crime to be friends with people from other houses?"
Levi shrugged, putting food on his plate as Isabel laughed, saying to ignore them.
Erwin, though, looked thoughtful. "Well, as far as this kid goes, it's just that he's somehow come to the conclusion he's some elite just because he's a Malfoy or whatever. Honestly, pretty much everyone from the higher years can't stand him."
"So he's an annoying, spoilt, rich brat and he's not worth worrying your pretty little head about," summed up Levi matter-of-factly.
Erwin ignored him and continued. "But I have no idea about the rest. Maybe I could do a study about it. Might have an interesting sociological result that could be useful later."
He got several weird looks form his friends, even some from others who only happened to overhear.
Levi was the first to look away, being by far most used to the stuff that sometimes came out of Erwin's mouth, but before he returned to his food, he muttered, "You sound like Hanji."
Everyone burst out laughing at the over-the-top disgust Levi expressed. They all knew he loved Hanji dearly, even though he'd rather touch Snape's hair with his bare hand and without any protective spells than admit to it.
Krista Lenz spent half the train ride back to London consoling a heartbroken Hanji Zoe after she found out there was a three-headed dog behind the locked door – and a troll.
Before going their separate ways on the King's Cross station, Eren and Levi made plans for a date next week. They found out early on they were actually both from London and meeting up was easy for them as opposed to some other couples. They shot a sad look towards where Connie was assuring Sasha he wouldn't cheat on her and that they would survive two months without each other, and Krista and Ymir were silently conspiring about how to meet up, since the two lived not physically that far away, really, but Krista was from some big, dark, shadow family (they didn't know any details as Krista hated talking about it) and Ymir wasn't exactly welcome there.
Hanji tried to make sure that the group could meet up at least for their shopping for next year supplies but soon it became obvious that plan would fall through. There were just too many of them and each of them had family trips that fell on different dates. There was no way they could all meet up.
In the end, they managed to only make one bigger group trip.
Levi was half-listening to Isabel chattering away while he glared for the hundredth time across the underground train at the two middle-aged people who just couldn't let him go shopping alone. He just couldn't understand why his mother and uncle insisted on coming with him every year. They were muggles, it was not like they understood what they were looking at most of the time, and they there wasn't anything they would want to buy anyway – or at least there shouldn't be.
He was pretty sure his mother came only to have an excuse for a coffee date with Eren's mother as the two immediately became best friends upon meeting for the first time but as for his uncle, well... He suspected his insistence had something to do with the first time Levi went to the Diagon Alley before his first year at Hogwarts began. Of course, it was his first time so his family went with him.
They somehow ended up in the Knockturn Alley and stumbled into this dark magic shop. Levi was unimpressed as it looked like no one cleaned inside the shop for decades, but his mother and uncle showed an undeniable amount of interest. His mother looked satisfied just looking around once and never coming back but uncle Kenny kept asking questions about the display items and ended up having a heated discussion with the shop-keeper about the most efficient ways of torturing people and the differences between muggle and wizarding approaches to the matter.
The left only when his mother became bored and dragged her brother out by the ear. They returned to the Diagon Alley and went on about with their shopping, but soon they realized Kenny disappeared. He only turned up half an hour later with a suspicious grin on his face, hiding something in his pocket. Levi didn't want to know.
A week later, however, he overheard some of his uncle's goons asking Kenny how he found out "the new kid was an enemy gang spy" and praising him for "getting him to talk so easily". Kenny answered with a mysterious, smug "Magic," and Levi could only roll his eyes and pretend he didn't hear anything as the impressed, admiring "ooohs" echoed throughout their house.
Levi shook his head at the memory as they arrived at their stop. The five of them met up with the Jaegers, Armin, Hanji, Jean, Marco and Erd in front of the Leaky Cauldron. They were the last to arrive, courtesy of Isabel and her inability to choose a dress on the first or fifth time, and so they went inside immediately after their greetings.
To all the kid's relief, the adults left them alone as soon as they climbed through the opening in the wall, Kenny waving at them, saying to meet him at the bar when their done, stalking away without explanation. Carla and Kuchel headed towards Fortescue's chatting happily and Grisha excused himself, saying he needs to visit the pharmacy as he is almost out of supplies.
Levi briefly wondered how the man kept managing to avoid the ministry magic use surveillance. He was a trained Healer, but he worked as England's best physical therapist and homeopath. ("He's able to heal even diseases and aches all the best doctors in the country couldn't make better! He's like a magician!" 'Yeah, he's a magician alright,' Levi mumbled to himself when he heard some women talking in the waiting room of Grisha Jaeger's home office when he went to visit Eren once.)
Left to their own devices, the group of teenagers started their journey around the Diagon Alley, starting with the mundane shopping and keeping Hanji out of trouble and Eren and Jean as far away from each other as possible. Despite the popular opinion, they learned from their mistakes. The incident from their third year's Hogsmead trip that ended with Jean sporting the Hog's head's sign in place of his own head and Eren locked inside the Shrieking Shack was still fresh in their minds. (Some of them laughed way too hard as they watched Mikasa rescue a terrified Eren and Armin try to transfigure a fuming Jean back to ever forget.)
They left the book shopping for last as no one could be bothered to carry the weight around but as they neared the bookshop, they almost turned right back around. For some reason, there was an insanely long line of blushing witches. Eren had to drag Levi inside forcibly, steering him carefully through the crowds as they looked for their books. When they saw the commotion was about the autograph session of one Gilderoy Lockhart, the author of most of their required books, they curiously went to look at the guy, picking up a book along the way. Mikasa turned a few pages of the book, Break with a Banshee, and shut it resolutely. "I'm not buying this crap. I vote we buy one set and share it between the all of us. Though I doubt any of us will actually need it."
Armin looked through the book curiously, then towards the beginning of the line where a sparkly, pretty boy was sitting surrounded by his own photographs, flashing unnaturally white smiles. "Well, who wants to bet this guy's gonna be our new DADA teacher?"
Levi scoffed. "The guy looks like he wouldn't be able to deal with Hanji, much less an actual Banshee."
"Hey!" Hanji protested. She was generally ignored as everyone nodded in agreement.
"Well," started explaining Armin, "these are obviously adventure novels. Who in their right mind would make these into textbooks? It's gotta be either one of his fangirls, or him."
"I still can't believe Armin was right," Eren said in amazement as the fifth year Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs headed for their first Defence against the Dark Arts class of the year.
"I just hope the classes won't be as useless as they seem they will be," grumbled Jean in response. "We do have OWLs this year."
"At least he seems stupid enough to not notice me eating," laughed Sasha hugging a bag of food to her chest.
"And me sleeping," added Connie, high-fiving his girlfriend.
Isabel joined the optimistic approach, "And he's nice to look at, you can't deny that."
The only one who seemed to agree was Petra, who sighed dreamily. The others gave her a disgusted look. "Are you serious?" Mikasa asked, horrified.
Eren shook his head, saying gravely, "I feel sorry for Farlan."
"Oh come on, he's so pretty!" Petra whined and Auruo looked like he highly regretted his hopeless crush.
"I will never understand women and their standards," muttered Gunther, Erd nodding along.
Petra and Isabel didn't speak to any of them for the rest of the day, even after witnessing what a turn-off Lockhart's narcissism was. Admitting to your mistakes was hard.
Then Halloween came and with it, confusion and worry. It was not like anyone would miss Mrs Norris but seriously, if a cat could be petrified, humans could, too. And what was that about the Chamber of Secrets and Heir?
It seemed really suspicious and dangerous, at least to some. The Gryffindors seemed pretty much unaffected, apparently thinking their courage would save them from obvious dark magic and the Ravenclaws seemed more intrigued than anything. The Hufflepuffs were worried but Sasha and Connie were doing their best to be as goofy as always, dispersing any tension spreading across the group.
Ironically, it was the Slytherins who seemed the most affected by the incident, even though they didn't let it show. The instinct telling them when something was better left alone, better avoided at all costs that was ingrained in most Slytherins was screaming at them, telling them to lay low and hope the storm will pass.
The six of them started keeping closer eye on their friends, Farlan going as far as not letting Isabel go anywhere by herself. Levi trusted Eren to take care of himself and was further soothed by the knowledge that Mikasa wouldn't let anything happen to her brother any less than him, so he didn't feel the need to secretly follow his boyfriend from class to class. Honestly, he was more worried about Hanji as she seemed one minute of boredom away from going on a Chamber of Secrets hunt.
That didn't mean he didn't worry about Eren, of course. And him trying to hide it also didn't mean he succeeded. The two were sitting by the lake one afternoon when Eren brought it up.
"Why are you so worried?" he asked softly, watching Hanji try to communicate with Moby-Dick on the other side. (The whole group stopped questioning the fact Moby-Dick was a whale while the Squid was, well, a squid, a long time ago. They just made peace with the fact that Hanji is Hanji.)
"I'm not," Levi said stubbornly, throwing a little stone into the water.
Eren sighed, looking over at his boyfriend and taking his hand. "Levi. You are worried."
There was silence for a long while, Eren waiting patiently as Levi played with his fingers absently. Then, finally, "Someone died the last time the Chamber was supposedly open."
Eren caught Levi's fingers and squeezed tightly. "That doesn't mean someone will die this time."
"I know. But... no one knows what happened. What caused the petrification. Not even Dumbledore. How do you defend against it? If some lunatic suddenly runs at you from around the corner, firing some unknown, old, dark curse, what are you supposed to do?"
"You're thinking too hard about it." Eren smiled reassuringly but Levi only scowled at him in return.
"No, you're just taking it too lightly. If Uncle Kenny taught me something, it's fighting with a knife and knowing when to run. I should be running right now."
"But you aren't," Eren pointed out cheekily.
Levi rolled his eyes before leaning over and kissing Eren softly. "Just don't let anything happen to you."
Nanaba was once again left questioning Hanji Zoe's sanity as the later started running around their bedroom in panic, screaming about how Leggy and Bitey, the spiders living in the corner by her bed, had disappeared and she had to go find them before something happened to them. (Nanaba didn't dare tell her roommate she... disposed of them after she found them crawling towards her bed that was under the window. With her wand. From across the room. And no, she wasn't afraid of spiders.)
The second attack happened, this time petrifying a student. To say everyone was starting to feel uneasy would be an understatement. However, upon finding the notice about a Duelling Club, Levi had to scoff. Needless to say, he didn't share the entire student body's relief and excitement and it seemed like Farlan and Isabel were the only two people understanding his sentiment. Probably because they understood all too well where it was coming from, growing up the same way Levi did.
"This is complete bullshit; how do these people think it's going to help," Levi muttered in amazement as he watched the students reacting with unveiled joy.
"I know right?" snickered Isabel, leaning over Farlan. "It's not like when someone is going to jump you, they are going to ask nicely if it's okay with you."
Farlan laughed loudly at the mental image of Kenny or some of the scarier gang members going to attack someone and asking them to "take out your gun and take up position for a duel, please and thank you." It was beyond ridiculous.
"Don't you think it might prepare us at least a little?" Erwin asked seriously.
The three of them looked at each other before simultaneously replying, "Not a chance."
In the end no one managed to talk either of them into coming to the Duelling Club meeting but everyone else in their group went. And they had to admit it was useless, mostly because the teacher was Lockhart, Snape being there obviously just to have an excuse to humiliate the other teacher and not giving a darn about the club otherwise. But there was one thing that made them not regret coming.
As they were told to pair up, they somehow ended up in a way that had Mikasa with Annie. Needless to say, none of the others even started their mock-duels, instead watching carefully how the two would go at it. And it was... intense. The two girls had distinctly different fighting styles but no one could tell which one had the advantage. Spells were flying at rapid speed from both of them and then everywhere around them as they kept reflecting them. Their audience, that grew steadily until half the hall was watching the duel, was forced to move further away as no one was exactly eager to end up getting hit with any stray spells.
Armin just started accepting bets when they were interrupted by a loud shout of "Finite Incantatem!"
Everyone around was angry at Snape for stopping the fierce fight and not letting them witness it to the end. However, no one dared to protest.
At least they got to find out there was a Parselmouth in this day and age first hand. Moreover, Harry Potter was one. Intriguing to say the least.
Still doesn't beat watching the two best witches currently residing at Hogwarts finally face off, though.
Erwin Smith spent his last Saturday before Christmas chasing Hanji Zoe around the Forbidden Forrest because, "I might finally find the Acromantula nest that the centaurs told me about! These cute little spiders will lead my way!"
Levi was beyond horrified when he came up for breakfast on February 14th. The decorations were disgusting and it only got worse when Lockhart introduced his army of "cupids". The raven haired Slytherin started feeling sick when he realized there was someone more than likely to use those poor dwarfs. He shot a warning look towards the Gryffindor table but Eren met his eyes straight on, grinning innocently.
Levi wondered if there was something like a wizardring PETA and how fast they could act if he contacted them right now about the blatant abuse these dwarfs were forced to endure.
Levi's anxiety only grew throughout the day as still no cupids were coming and he only kept witnessing other people suffering of their evil ways. During one break he was walking down the hallway, overhearing something about fresh pickled frogs and blackboards. He shuddered when he realized that Eren would come up with something like this, maybe something even worse.
It wasn't until his last class, Potions with Gryffindors, when the fateful moment came. Snape was just explaining the properties of the potion they were about to attempt to make, when the door flew open and there stood a particularly sour-looking dwarf before it purposefully strutted over to stop at Levi feet. From the corner of his eyes he could see Eren beaming proudly.
Levi set it on fire before it could say a word.
This action earned him fifty points from Snape, a detention from Lockhart after he started investigating why exactly was one of his precious cupids slightly charred, and a sulking Eren.
(He didn't turn up for his detention. Lockhart didn't even notice – or maybe he was too put off by Levi's glare to say anything.)
Levi had to admit a week without kisses was way worth saving him the embarrassment.
It was a week before OWLs when Eren stumbled into the Gryffindor common room with Armin in tow, both carrying a mountain of books. The two boys headed towards the corner table where they left their things prior leaving to the library, only to stop short upon realizing someone was sitting there.
They took two more steps, Eren fully intending to scream at the intruder for kidnapping their table. He was about to start shouting when he realized it was his boyfriend with his head buried in a book on animal transfiguration. "Levi? What are you doing here? Didn't you say we'd only distract you and you'd stay in the dungeons?" he asked instead, confused.
Levi looked up, the dark circles under his eyes only more prominent than normally. "Yeah, well, Farlan said Hanji was running around the castle looking for me to scream at me about something. Figured she'd be more distracting than you."
Armin frowned, depositing his stack of books on the table. "Why are you here though? You could have gone anywhere else?"
"She was here already. Won't look here again for a while."
"Oh," Armin nodded in understanding, sitting down opposite the Slytherin.
The three of them proceeded to each do their own thing for a while, Eren's and Levi's legs tangled together under the table and Armin doing his best to ignore that fact. It was an hour later when they got interrupted by Marco coming up to them, looking for Jean. By this time they were getting some weird looks from the younger students.
"Last time I saw him, he was hiding in his bed," Eren mumbled absently, turning a page and scribbling something into his notebook. (Because fuck parchment and quills.)
Marco thanked him, muttering about irresponsible boyfriends running away from their studies. Three minutes Marco was back with a reluctant Jean in tow. The two joined them in their studying session, Marco nudging Jean once in a while to make him focus.
They continued this way in peace for thirty more minutes until a frustrated Annie came up to them. "Thank fuck. I need this book; I thought I was going to blow the library up when Pince told me it was all borrowed out. Give it back in two hours."
"Hey, I need that thing!" Jean screamed desperately as the blond snatched it up from his hands.
Annie only gave him a cold look, raising an eyebrow. "So?"
"Annie, just sit down with us, okay?" Armin tried to save the situation before blood was spilled. They were all stressed, after all.
Annie slowly looked at him, than pointedly around the full table. "And where am I supposed to sit?"
"Just pull up a chair or something; we can squeeze in here," Eren muttered, his patience running low at all these interruptions. It amazed him how Levi didn't even notice.
Annie shrugged, taking a chair from a nearby table without asking and flopped down in between Armin and Marco. Armin leaned over, giving her a kiss on the cheek. He smiled fondly at the slight blush that appeared on her face. Everyone but Levi, who was fully focused on his book and completely oblivious to his surroundings, gaped in shock.
"When did this happen?" Eren squeaked, pointing an accusing finger at his best friend.
Annie rolled her eyes turning her attention to the stolen book, while Armin raised an eyebrow, answering calmly, "Almost half a year ago. You genuinely didn't notice?"
The three boys were speechless.
The portrait hole burst open in that moment. "Armin! Heeeeeeeelp us, pleeeaaase!" came two cries immediately after as Sasha and Connie fell through, tears in their eyes.
The six of them stared at the two Hufflepuffs squirming on the floor; even Levi looked up, blinking a few times in confusion.
"That does it!" came a shout from a certain sixth year red-headed prefect. "What do you think is the point of separate houses and having passwords!"
Levi looked at the fuming prefect blankly. "To be fair, anyone with half a brain can get inside the Ravenclaw house. But anyway, you tell me. I've been asking about this exact thing since first year and I have yet to get a single coherent answer. Maybe you'd like to enlighten me, oh great mister prefect?"
Percy Weasley started turning red as Eren snickered next to Levi. "OUT!"
"I know the password; I have a full right to be here. Try throwing me out, shitty red-head," Levi said challengingly.
"This is why you aren't a prefect," muttered Armin across the table, looking up from Sasha and Connie who were now, to Annie's immeasurable amusement, grovelling at his feet, begging for tutoring.
"Not like I wanted the shitty badge anyway. Now stop distracting me, brats."
There was a slight smile on Levi's lips as he returned to his notes. Percy fumbling for something to say was a satisfying background noise for his studying.
"Twenty points from each of your houses!" came a shout five minutes later.
Annie snorted as Armin replied absently, "You can't take point from other prefects."
"WHAT?!"
The blond looked up, giving Percy an unimpressed stare. "There are three prefects here," he stated, pointing to his chest. Marco waved with an embarrassed grin and Annie raised a challenging eyebrow as her only acknowledgement.
"Weasley, calm down," came Mikasa's voice from behind. When she arrived, no one knew, but she was still in her Quidditch gear. She strode over to their table, dropping an armful of small bags in top of all their books. "Snacks," she explained, cocking her head. "Though I thought I was getting those just for the three of us. Whatever, I'm not going back to the kitchen."
"Students can't go into the kitchens! Thirty points from Gryffindor!"
Mikasa stared at him impassively. "I'm a prefect, too. Seriously, Weasley, you should stop ogling Clearwater during the meetings and start paying attention to your surroundings a little." She paused, looking at her friends critically, than at Percy and back at her friends. "In fact, I think giving twenty points to each of you is in order. Splendid promotion of interhouse unity." Her voice was completely flat but Eren heard the sarcasm and amusement in his sister's announcement.
The year older boy gaped, opening and closing his mouth again in search of something to say. All of them started laughing.
"That's not what she said when she caught us snogging yesterday," Levi muttered quietly so only Eren could hear. The Gryffindor laughed harder.
The entirety of the fifth and seventh years was fuming when a week after their OWLs and NEWTs Harry Potter apparently single handedly killed a basilisk and saved the school, ensuring that all the other students would be excused from taking exams.
Life was so unfair.
Don't get them wrong, they were happy the danger was averted and no one suffered any lasting damage, but that didn't mean they couldn't be bitter over the fact he just couldn't go be a hero a week earlier.
Well, at least the party was worth it. For once the professors acted like they didn't see the fire whiskey going around (although they did intervene when one stray bottle somehow found its way from the seventh years to a group of third years) and some couples even found new appreciation for 3 AM make-outs.
At one point Armin personally went to thank Harry Potter for his heroism. Eren had a feeling the boy misinterpreted the older Ravenclaw's sentiment though. Who could blame him. There was no way he could know Armin had been taking bets on who would find the Chamber since it opened and Potter just made him huge profit since most people went the safe way and bet on Dumbledore, or the naive, fangirl way, betting on Lockhart. Who would have thought a second year would manage to do something generations failed at.
Apparently, Erwin Smith did, but that was beside the point.
And so, the next summer holidays began, leaving most of the group to communicate though muggle post and owls.
"PS: Hanji Zoe, is that a freaking HARPY that delivered your letter?! Put it back where you found it, it's goddarn CRITICALLY ENDANGERED not to mention DEADLY!"
A/N: So these are the first two years! Yay!
I wanted to wait until it was finished to post it, but that will still be a while and I am currently suffering from self-doubt and wanted to hear what people thought... Judge me. (That said, I have no idea when the second half will be done.)
Anyway, hope it's not too terrible...