Fifty Shades of Black

by siriusblackisgod

The Black family heir finally decided he had enough of living the Toujours Pur way. Now Sirius just needs to make it through his sixth year, though it's hard for a boy who likes to pretend nothing bothers him when everything is currently bothering him. Will he manage to make it through the year without killing a Slytherin? Only Merlin himself knows. Perhaps a distraction will help.

If there was one thing Sirius Black didn't like it was his family. Bloody hell he hated them, especially his mum. Walburga Black wouldn't understand nice unless it bit her on the arse and then proceeded to slap her the face to let her know puppies everywhere have nightmares about her. She'd more than likely smile and still not be satisfied because every man, woman, child, and animal wasn't scared of her yet. Sirius himself wasn't scared of her-or at least he wasn't anymore. She was his boggart during his third year which was probably the most embarrassing thing he ever witnessed in his entire life, especially when the other pureblood kids laughed at him. Haha, Sirius Orion Black the third was scared of his own bloody mum. How pathetic, right? Wrong.

The woman is a bloody menace. She put stories of Lord Voldemort himself to shame. While Sirius wasn't quite sure she actually ever killed anyone he was quite familiar with the back of her hand and her razor sharp tongue. Young Sirius thought it was normal when he was younger, but now at the end of his summer right before his sixth year he was well acquainted with Mrs. Potter and learned not every woman over the age of thirty was a raging bitch. It was eye opening. Practically a bloody fairy tale when Mrs. Potter wanted to hug him before he went on the train before his fourth year. Hug him. Actually affection from another human being. To this day it still made Sirius' skin crawl-though it wasn't because the thought of it repulsed him. Sirius just more times than not wasn't sure how to respond to physical affection. Toujours Pur should have come with subtext saying:

"If someone in this family is to touch you it probably means they have every intention of hurting you. Run now and try to remember what you did wrong later. If you stick around long enough to find out you're dead already. Rest in peace."

Sadly enough Sirius didn't learn about this until his later year-well, he didn't really notice it was an unbinding contract that wasn't even bothered to be put on a piece of parchment. He really noticed all of the faults and bad parts of his family when he was sorted into Gryffindor. He didn't understand because red and gold was his color. Green wouldn't really match his complexion all that well and he was taught to look his best. You'd think his parents would have been proud of him, but sadly enough Walburga and Orion Black had never been proud of their son for a moment in their life. Too bad it wasn't as easy as just switching the heirs of the family otherwise that more than likely would have happened years ago. Maybe even a birth. They probably were able to tell something was off about Sirius when he was born. Well, something wasn't really off because he wasn't considered different until he was put through the hell that is his family; but off by the standards of his family. Fucked up standards if you were to ask him. Though, not many people listened.

Sirius himself didn't listen for a good length of time. Even after he realized just how far deep his family had their own heads up their arse he stuck around, just for his younger brother Regulus. When they were young they were close, but once they both went to school and made friends with different crowds they drifted apart and barely even spoke unless it was to argue. His entire family was crumbling around him and Sirius didn't want to be there when it all turned to shit and fell apart entirely because it more than likely was going to fall right on top of him. He was the center of the destruction of it all. With his leather jacket, posters of naked girls, motorbike he didn't even know how to ride, and really loud music he was practically an outcast already. If he didn't have the abnormally good looks and personality of a Black he tried so desperately to hide at times you wouldn't even know he belonged to the House of Black. Well, he also spoke fluent French from spending one too many summers at his grandparents' manor on the coast. They were a bit more strict than his parents but at least they were quite so loud or abusive. Them? Sirius could put up with. His parents? Not quite so much.

It was only a matter of time before something happened. Something that would tip things over the end entirely. The Marauders- James Potter, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew, were already making bets as to which parent was going to piss Sirius off to the point of murder. He hadn't even graduated and only had to see them during the summer. He tried not to show things got to him as much as they did, but he wasn't good at it. Sirius was the type of person who wore his heart on his sleeve. While he didn't talk about his feelings all that much because he was used to keeping them bottled up he showed them other ways. Normally if he was really angry he'd turn his music up and find a bottle of firewhiskey to help him forget about his troubles. Other times he'd find a girl so he could get lost in a warm body for a few hours. It was so much better than talking about things that upset Sirius because he wasn't sure how to. It was practically a foreign thought to him and even the few times he tried he could never really articulate his thoughts so in the end he just got irritated with himself and proceeded to handle things his own way.

On a rainy night towards the end of the summer was the night Sirius decided to do exactly that-handle things his own way. It also was the night decided to say "fuck you" to his family. It was the night he ran away and had no fucking idea where to go.