Summary: Very few people knew of Elsa's lonely childhood in the thirteen years she was kept isolated. Her one confidant was a knitted penguin with one button for an eye she named Sir Jorgenbjorgen. If Sir Jorgenbjorgen could talk, this would be his tale.
The Silent Listener
"He was always a good listener." – Elsa on Sir Jorgenbjorgen
Chapter One: Sister Magic
The earliest moment I knew began with the feeling of smooth fingers that rubbed at my cheek before they moved up to caress the three tiny hairs that stood on my head. She (a term I first learned to use for this being that held me when I was not even aware of the concept of names) was a gentle creature, I decided. She would be a good sort to be with and she made me feel secure and comfortable with her simple affectionate gesture. Her touch was icy cold but that never really bothered me. I understood soon enough we had that in common.
One of the first things I noticed about her appearance were her eyes. They were little blue orbs that held me with such delighted wonder. She had so much hair, so white and lengthy unlike mine that stood perpetually up in their shocking orange color. However, it was her voice that truly captivated me and held my full attention. When she spoke, her voice had a rhythmic tone, rising and falling evenly with her occasional sighs. I've come to know those sighs more as time passed for she let them out quite often as she stared at her windowpane for hours while looking out into the world outside which she never explored. However, the first moment of our meeting her sighs were of joy. I was to be her new companion, she said, because she had to give up her own doll to her little sister.
"I can get you another doll," another voice in the room called out and I realized this world had more than one occupant. The new voice was also gentle but her next words gave me cause for alarm. "I can send for a fine one from the toymaker in the village or even a better one from Paris. They have one of those lovely ones that look exactly like a little girl with real hair you can comb. You can just throw that away. It looks odd. I just made it for my practice anyway. It doesn't even have proper eyes."
I can only look up at the creature that held me with my single eye, as a paralyzing feeling came over me. However, she looked back at me so tenderly I was immediately relieved.
"Oh no Mama, please if you are to send for a new doll, I want Anna to have it. This one's fine for me," she said.
There was a pause and I felt the other creature's presence approach until I saw It clearly. It was taller, with dark hair and dark eyes but Its voice also had a soft tone that was soothing even to me.
"Elsa, you don't have to give up everything to Anna you know. You may not be able to see her or go outside, but your Papa and I can provide for anything you want."
She stared down at me and I caught a change in her expression which I understood to mean she felt something unpleasant. Her fingers stroked my hair once more.
"I don't need dolls Mama," she said evenly. "I'm almost nine now. I should be focusing on my studies. Books would be preferable if you will bring me something new. But I like to keep this little thing. It's cute in its own way."
The bigger being called "Mama" let out her own sigh. "If that's what you want dear. I'll let your father know. He'll join you tonight at dinner and you can tell him which new books you want."
She nodded and we both watched as Mama disappeared from view. Once alone, she turned back to me.
"I didn't want to tell her," she said. "I wanted you because Anna helped Mama make you. When Mama was learning to knit, you were one of her first creations. Anna was just so young then and was in her earlier destructive phase." She paused to let out a giggle. "Mama said she needed stuffing for a practice doll she was making so Anna darling that she is decided she could help by ripping open Papa's favorite cotton pillow with her teeth. There was so much cotton in the drawing room that day and Anna stood in the middle of it holding out fistfuls of cotton. The servants were horrified and tried to salvage much of it but Anna wouldn't let them repair anything until Mama used some to stuff you. She even used the bit of thread Anna refused to give up from the broken tassel of the pillow. Those threads became your hair."
She affectionately smoothed my hair again but her face wore the same sad expression while she heaved another cold breath.
"I've given all my dolls to Anna so she can have a part of me. You're a part of Anna... the only one I'll have of her now."
Something fell from her eyes and pierced my chest. It went through my knitted skin and entered my cotton stuffing. Everywhere it touched me it left an odd sensation that made me feel heavy.
I learned days later they were called tears. She showered me with them quite often for several years.
Her name is Elsa. She's a young princess cursed with an unusual power to create ice that she cannot control. And that makes her very frightened of everything and everyone around her.
Everything except for me. Nothing she can make from her hands can hurt me. If she accidentally froze me, she can just give me a little shake and the ice crystals would just fall off. So she kept me by her side and she would talk to me for hours.
She told me the entire story: how she almost killed her sister while they were playing in her snow and how her parents decided that until she can control her powers she needed to be isolated. She found me among her sewing items while she was packing away her things from the room she shared with her sister to move into a bedchamber of her own.
It's been several days now since we've settled into our room. I've taken to calling it "our room" for Elsa always made me feel like I belonged. She always talks to me whenever she's not reading her endless supply of books. Even when she's reading she kept me close by and would occasionally run her fingers through my hair.
Earlier this evening her Papa came with a gift: a pair of gloves that Elsa can wear to help her control her powers. He also taught her a new saying: "Conceal it, don't feel it. Don't let it show." It seems to help her calm herself for she kept repeating them several hours after her Papa left. She only stopped when she picked up a book to read in bed. She had a habit of reading aloud one story each night before sleeping as she said she always did for Anna when they were still sharing a room. She kept the habit and read to me instead. So each night, I enjoyed a new story on the Adventures of Flynnigan Rider, a swashbuckling wealthy rogue who travelled to many faraway lands, encountered so many new people and always seem to make the ladies he met swoon. Elsa said he was Anna's favorite hero and always insisted on hearing more.
Tonight however, Elsa had chosen a new book to read: "The Life and Works of Sir Johann Kristian Jorgenbjorgen, Admiral and Statesman." It didn't sound as exciting as her usual adventure story but as Elsa turned the pages and began reading in her dulcet tones, her eyes sparkled with fascination. Slowly, the image of a young brilliant man who rose from obscurity to prominence came alive in my mind.
He wasn't anything like Flynnigan Rider, who was born as a nobleman with natural charms and physical strength and skills. Jorgenbjorgen was born youngest from a large family and had little wealth of his own. He was socially awkward, a bit shy and had few friends or opportunities in life. However, he worked hard to develop both his mind and body, while creating his own opportunities for advancement. He entered the navy at age eleven, became a Captain by his twenty-first year and rose to become an admiral at twenty-nine. In between, he studied law, participated in four victorious naval battles, wrote several political treatises and gained the favor of the nobles in his kingdom that by age thirty he was already an adviser to the king of the Southern Isles.
I could see Elsa admired this man for she stayed up so late reading about him she finished a quarter of the book until past midnight. She let out a yawn and noticed the time.
"As much as I want to go on, I have lessons tomorrow," she said as she marked the page with a piece of ribbon and closed it carefully. "Sir Jorgenbjorgen," she sighed as she stared up at the image of the redheaded man on the front cover. "Such a funny name but I'd love to have a friend like him."
She glanced back at me and ran her thumb at my cheek tentatively before her eyes lit up. "Hmmm... maybe I can. That's what I'll call you! Sir Jorgenbjorgen. It has a nice ring to it, don't you think?"
I thought so too. I felt a sense of euphoria in having a name. And I couldn't feel more honored that Elsa chose to name me after a person she esteemed.
She moved my head playfully up and down in an imitation of nodding.
"I'm glad you like it. Well goodnight Sir Jorgenbjorgen. I'm happy to have you as my friend."
"Goodnight Elsa. I'm happy to be your friend too," I wanted to reply but I had no way to do so for my knitted beak didn't seem to work the same way as her mouth that can make sounds. Fortunately, Elsa seemed to have understood. She kissed my head and laid me on the pillow next to her. Her even breathing told me minutes later that she was asleep.
I watched her the whole night and I noticed a smile on her face. I like to think that I helped put it there.
Weeks turned to months and the leaves from the trees that we used to watch from the glass pane of our room grew brown and fell to the ground. I felt a chill in the air that came from outside instead of from Elsa whenever she opened a window. I've learned so much being with Elsa for she was a voracious reader and always enjoyed talking. Oh she can talk for hours while she studied her lessons. She conversed with me while practicing her Latin conjugations, repeated to me ideas on Philosophy and the Sciences to help her understand difficult concepts and even sought my opinion when she was doing her watercolor paintings of real life stills. I can never reply of course but Elsa pretended I could and spoke for me whenever she wanted a reply. Often, her make-believe replies for me were spot-on with my own opinions that I've come to believe we've grown so close she can either read my mind or I was channeling my thoughts to hers.
Her interactions with her sister however, remained painful for her. Almost everyday Anna would come knocking at the door, asking her to go out and play. Elsa at first tried to be patient, inventing excuses that she was busy with studies to leave her room. But Anna appeared to be quite perceptive and stubborn that lately she no longer bought the excuses. Today, I witnessed snow falling from the sky outside instead of from Elsa's hands. Elsa said it was now officially the start of winter, her favorite season of the year for obvious reasons. However, she had no cause to celebrate this year, for the first snowfall brought Anna knocking again as usual. This time, she had a new enticing line to offer:
"Do you wanna build a snowman?"
The words seemed to startle Elsa and I understood why. She said the best times she shared with Anna were the ones when they spent playing in her snow and building things. I could see from her face her longing to experience that again. She rushed to the door but stopped a foot away from it.
"Maybe just this once Jorgenbjorgen," she whispered to me. "I don't have to touch her. I could keep my distance and we could go outside. If my powers let out she won't notice it apart from the natural falling snow."
Her hand reached out for the handle but even before her skin came in contact with the metal, a burst of frost covered it almost immediately. She gasped as she hurriedly stepped back, her body trembling with horror. I knew her first thought was for Anna. Was her frost strong enough that it could have penetrated the wood and hit her sister on the other side?
"No... no... not again..." she whispered as she wrapped her arms against herself in an effort to keep her powers in. It didn't work for frost started appearing below her feet and snowflakes began swirling just below the ceiling.
"I never see you anymore. Come out the door. It's like you've gone away." Anna's muffled singsong came from the crack under the door and Elsa and I knew immediately she was unhurt. However, the frost was still growing under Elsa's shoes, sealing the floor with a layer of ice and she feared it would reach Anna soon.
"She can't be here," Elsa sobbed silently." "I'll hurt her."
"Do you wanna build a snowman? It doesn't have to be a snowman," came the childish voice through the keyhole.
Elsa stared frantically at the spreading ice that was just mere inches from the door.
"Go away Anna!" Elsa cried out before she covered her mouth to hide the sob that followed. I knew it hurt her to say something so cruel to her sister but there was simply no other way to get to Anna to leave before the danger of her ice got to her.
There was a moment of silence then a sad: "Okay, bye," was heard behind the door followed by footsteps drawing away.
Elsa sank to the floor, clutched me to her chest and openly sobbed.
She cried for a week after that for Anna didn't knock again.
It's been a week since the sad incident with Anna and today, Elsa told me, was the start of the December holidays in Arendelle. This was the day her family rang the Yule bell at noon to celebrate the season. But Papa had told Elsa last night she and Anna would not be participating this year. It would be the first time Elsa would not be ringing the bell with her family.
Elsa listlessly sat by the window, her one hand clutching my body while her other stroked at my hair. She had been like this since breakfast. She made an effort to read at some point but she quit after an hour for she seemed fixated between watching her clock that ticked away the minutes to noon and the view of the window that revealed a world of white everywhere.
The clock suddenly chimed but its noise was immediately drowned out by a louder metallic clang coming from outside. Elsa stood up at attention as if she was preparing to meet her tutor for her daily studies, but then she seemed to remember she was alone and slowly eased her posture.
"The bell," she whispered. We listened to the sounds for several minutes. Elsa shut her eyes, her expression full of longing like she was drinking in every sound. She only reopened her eyes when the clanging ceased completely.
"It sounds so different when we were out there pulling at the rope. I remember the first time I did it. Papa carried me in his arms and he placed the rope in my hands. 'Hold tight Elsa,' he said. 'It's important for a future Queen to grasp it tightly and yank it as hard as she could so the bell will ring loud and clear all over Arendelle. People will then know what a strong monarch they have and that she is wishing them all well this season and assuring them all will be good.' And I took that to heart Jorgenbjorgen, I really did. I held it so tight even if the rope was coarse on my little hands. I pulled at it with all my might but Papa and Mama did most of it because I wasn't strong enough."
She put me down by the window and rested her elbows by the sill before she went on. "Every year I promised myself I would get better, stronger at pulling the bell. Papa said one day I will have to do it without him and Mama so I need to learn. When Anna came along Mama said she is to help me rule in the future so she needs to learn to pull the bell too. The first time Anna joined us in ringing in the bell, I repeated to her what Papa told me. She was so excited that she squirmed out of Papa's arms even before noon struck and climbed the rope itself. Even with her entire body pulling on the weight she couldn't make the rope move down an inch and people started laughing at her. Even Papa and Mama laughed too so Anna started crying which made people laugh even more."
A sad smile lit Elsa's face and she scratched my head affectionately. "Poor Anna. Nobody understood her distress. She wasn't crying because she was embarrassed, I'm sure she didn't understand what being embarrassed means yet. But I knew she cried because she was disappointed. She was frustrated that she couldn't be a good princess by pulling down the rope. I know, because I felt the same way when I was her age. So you know what I did to calm her down?"
Yes please Elsa, tell me, I wanted to shout out if I could.
"I told Anna we could be good princesses only if we work together. I told her it was our special sister magic that can make the bell ring. Anna stopped crying and she reached out for the end of the rope and offered it to me and that's when I knew I was right about what she felt. Her smile was so big when she heard the bell ring when we grasped it together with Papa and Mama. It's been like that for the last three years…"
Except for this year, I could have finished for her when her voice broke over.
"I wish they just let Anna ring the bell with them," Elsa said continued. "I know Papa said they're not taking Anna along so it wouldn't look suspicious that I'm being left out, but Anna deserves at least to celebrate the holidays with the people outside if she can't be with me."
I quietly agreed with her. I didn't understand why her Papa and Mama insisted on keeping Anna indoors as well. They said it was to keep appearances to the people in the kingdom that everything was normal with the family. I've listened to a lot of stories that Elsa read about how other children lived and in none of those stories was there anything that mentioned having children being kept indoors and out of sight from people at all times. I've come to the conclusion that Elsa's and Anna's predicament was not normal at all. I can understand the reasons for keeping Elsa and in, but Anna as far as I knew had none of those deficiencies that made Elsa dangerous. It hardly made things look more normal to have two children out of sight rather than just one. Keeping Anna locked inside the castle seemed rather pointless and even cruel.
"I hope they would just let Anna go out and play with other children. Or maybe they can invite children in to play with her. She shouldn't feel so lonely now she no longer has me."
I could hear the sadness in her voice when she said it and her next words were even more heartbreaking to hear. "If she met other children, maybe she'll forget how rude I was to her these past months. She clutched at my little body as if she was trying to wring out some kind of pain coursing through her fingers. "She'll have friends and maybe one day she'll learn to forget me. I can't bear that Jorgenbjorgen but I'd rather she forget me than put her in danger or hurt her again if I have to turn her away."
I felt a familiar tear drop on my cheek and I knew Elsa would be crying again for hours. She startled however, when a knock was heard on the door and a familiar voice called out.
"Elsa? I know maybe you're still mad at me so I stayed away, but I just want to give you a gift.
Something was slid under the door. It was a piece of paper with some kind of grotesque drawing but it immediately made Elsa smile.
"Olaf!" she gasped. "Our snowman," she explained.
"It's our old friend, Olaf," Anna said from behind the door for apparently she had not heard Elsa at all. "It's not as good as the real one we made with snow but since you can't come out and build it with me, I'm sending you a picture of him. I made it myself."
Elsa, I could see, couldn't speak with the tears choking her throat.
"Anyway, I know you're busy so I'm gonna go soon Elsa," Anna went on. "But I just want to say, I think the sister magic is still working, even if we're not there to ring the bell because… well the bell rang even if it's just Papa and Mama who did it. So I'll go now Elsa. Bye."
There were footsteps skipping down the corridor and then there was silence. Elsa picked up the drawing and stared at it for a long time.
"I believe in it too Anna. The sister magic is still working."