Oswald stared at himself in the mirror. He was finding his suits running tighter than usual. He ran his hand over his stomach. He had gained weight, even he could see that.
He sighed and ran a hand across his eyes. He frowned at the image he saw in the mirror. How could you love someone like him? Not only was he short, he looked like a bird, his hair was always plastered to his head , and his nose was too long and too hooked. Now the weight gain… he had let himself go. There was only so much one could hide with fine clothes.
His thoughts were reinforced when he found you sitting at the bar, surrounded by three tall handsome men. You were laughing, and Oswald felt a pang in his heart. He didn't deserve you. You were the only goodness left in Gotham and he would corrupt you if you stayed. He wasn't sure if he was selfless enough to let you go.
Oswald gave you a half hearted smile when you raised your hand in greeting, he turned away and headed to a private room in the back to conduct some business.
x.x
It was later in the night when Oswald returned to your side. You had no lack in company though while you waited for him. Men seemed to be attracted to a confidant woman. Though you were sure that in their eyes confident meant a deep blue dress tailored to your curves and a glass of whiskey in your hand. All the men to lavish attention on you, and you could care less. Their attempts were in vain. After all, your heart had been captured by a certain Oswald Cobblepot.
"Ready to go home darling?" You slipped your arm into his, and he smiled at you. Something was off though. Usually he looked at you like you were the moon and stars, and today there was an odd tinge of sadness to it.
"Of course." He raised your hand to his lips and ghosted a kiss over it. Oswald snapped his fingers and an attendant brought your coats.
x.x
You sat at your vanity mirror, carefully taking off the beautiful diamond earrings that Oswald had gifted to you so long ago. "Oswald? Could you get the zipper?" You lifted your hair out of the way and he dutifully unzipped your dress, before carefully turning away to collect his pajamas to change. This meant that he was going to change in the privacy of the bathroom.
A frown crossed your face. Another night of him changing in the bathroom. Oswald never changed in the bathroom. Not even when he was injured and brushed off your fussing. He had been acting odd for the past two weeks. You presumed it was something to do with the business, but now you weren't so sure. You traded your cocktail dress in favour of a floor length nightgown. It was one of Oswald's favourite pieces. All black lace and royal purple fabric. It had been a gift from him, and you knew how much he loved seeing you in it. "His queen" he called you.
You came up behind him to wrap your arms around his waist and kissed his shoulder. Oswald stiffened. "Please don't touch me."
Stunned you loosened your arms from him and stepped back, your feelings hurt. "Is it another woman?" You whispered, hugging your arms around yourself. He spun around to stare at you, shock evident in his crystal blue eyes.
"Why would you say that?"
"Because you have been acting odd for weeks. You avoid being intimate with me. You change in the bathroom and you turn off the lights when we do make love… I don't know if it's because you're hiding marks from her or what!" You half shouted the words at him, wanting to hurt him like he'd hurt you. "And now you won't even let me touch you."
Oswald shook his head and reached out for you, ignoring the flinch of your skin when he rested his hands against your arms. "Please my dove, it's not another woman. It's…" He couldn't say couldn't say he was pushing you away before you could leave on your own. Better to hurt yourself then to allow someone else to break you.
"Oswald. Talk to me. Please. We could always talk." You pleaded with him. You had been together so long and while communication hadn't always been easy between the two of you, it had certainly improved once he told you of his plans to be King of Gotham. Now he was the King, and everything felt like it was falling apart.
"I… I'm not good for you." He finally admitted.
You stared at him in shock. "Oswald, I think we've long since passed this conversation. I knew what I was getting into when I started dating you. I don't care. I can make my own choices, and I have always chosen you."
"You deserve so much better than me. You could have a honest life.A handsome man. A family." He couldn't look at you, and he let go of you.
"I don't care. I have what I want. You are my handsome man and you are my family." You were getting frustrated with him. He was being pigheaded as usual. "Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot. You are mine and I am yours."
"But I'm not handsome. I'm short. I've got this bum leg. My complexion leaves much to be desired. THEY CALL ME THE PENGUIN… that should say enough." He angrily shouted at you, "If we ever married, I couldn't even carry you into our house. and… I've gotten fat." His hand slammed against the door of the closet.
You stared at him. He was pushing you away because he thought he wasn't deserving of you? That you wouldn't love him because he'd gained some weight?
"You're blind then. I don't see any of that." You whispered, "I want to show you what I see when I look at you." You turned him towards the full length mirror.
Oswald's face flushed in shame. "I don't want to do this." He snapped.
"Hush. I am trying to show you something. Look at yourself." You commanded, standing behind him.
You smoothed your hands over his jacket, reaching around to slip your hands under the lapels to slide it off his shoulders. "I see a man who stands tall despite his sufferings."
The waist coat was next, your fingers nimbly moved down the buttons. "I see a man who lives life passionately."
The cufflinks were next. You lifted each of his hands and kissed the inside of his wrists as you undid the links. "I see a man who can wield the power of Gotham with just these hands. I see hands that bring love or bring death."
A shudder went through Oswald's body. His jaw had tightened and his eyes were beginning to shine.
"I see a man who is intelligent." You kissed his forehead. He closed his eyes, slight tears at the corners. "I see a man who loves vicariously." You unbuttoned the shirt and let it slide off his shoulders, leaving him in a white undershirt. You kissed each shoulder, and felt Oswald take quick sudden breaths.
You kneeled before him and took off his shoes and socks, "I see a man who defies the world despite his injuries."
Unfastening his pants, you slipped them away. "This is proof that not only did you survive Fish's anger, you prevailed and went far higher than she ever would." You kissed his twisted knee.
Oswald was crying silently now. His hands in fists at his sides. Worried you rose from your knees and wiped away the tears. "My love,these lips may speak harsh words at times, but they are my favourite. You spread the sweetest of kisses." You kissed him softly. "I love your freckles," You smiled and traced a finger across his nose, sweeping along his cheek. "Sometimes I count them like stars. Did you know you have 78 of them?" He shook his head.
"Oswald, I love you no matter what. I see you as you are. A intelligent, handsome and caring man." He broke down and hugged you close to him.
"I love your hair, how it sticks up in the mornings when you hold me close. I love your eyes. They're so clear and blue and they shine when you smile. I love your smile. When you smile at me, my world seems a brighter place." You continued to whisper everything you loved about him. "I love your shoulders, you always shiver when I run my hands over them so gently. I love your arms, they always hold me close when we fall asleep. I feel safe in them. Your hands make me feel all sorts of and naughty." Your hands smoothed across his arms and down his hands, before you separated yourselves enough to let them rest against his hips.
"I love that you adore and enjoy my cooking. It doesn't matter to me how slim or fit you are, as long as you're with me and you're happy. All I want is for you to be happy." You pleaded with him.
Oswald swallowed. He didn't know what he had done to deserve someone like you. He sniffled and rubbed at his face where there were still tears escaping from his eyes.
"I love you Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot. Please let me love you."
He couldn't resist the pleading in your voice. He broke down again. "I love you to my darling. I just… I don't know how you see all these wonderful things you speak of about me."
"Believe them. I never lie to you." There was honesty in your eyes and safety in your arms. You lead him to bed and he curled up against you. Your arms nestled around him, stroking along his back and arms, while he laid his head to rest against your bosom. He calmed himself by listening to the beat of your heart and the sigh of your breath against the top of his head.
The pair of you fell asleep this way, wrapped around each other in a loving embrace.