Tittle : Can You Hear Me Baby?
Pairing : Changminxfem!Junsu (˘▽˘sʃƪ
Author : ~shining_minsu
Foreword : 'Is it fun to listening music Min? I want to watch you in your final show.'
A/N : please enjoy it. No reread and no betaed ;A; i just finished my unfinished oneshoot fic before continue my chaptered fic. I also can't online because of my limited internet connection /.\ i cant post comment on fics in this MinSu section for next some months due to my money and my internet connection/.\ my parents give me no money when its holiday and it means no internet ;AAA; *kill maself*
But i really suggest you to check out every MinSu fic made by sanprista, chilispicy, hikaru_delsogno. I love all of them but poor me i cant read all of them now Щ(ºДºщ)
Now Playing :
#TVXQ! How Can I
#TVXQ!Changmin – A Person Like Tears
( ◦˘ з˘(◦'ﮞˉ◦)
oOo
Changmin drank his mineral water in the corner of practice room. He was having break after 2 hours do dance pratice with other trainees of TVXQ entertainment. Among other trainees, Changmin is just an ok trainee. He is ok in dancing and ok in singing. His ability is just his range of voice. He can reach more than 4 octave which he don't know exactly how many octave he can sing. And his face itself is a way common with other trainees.
Changmin take glances to the other trainees. There is Jaejoong who sit next to Yunho. Changmin chuckles. Well, their affair is somewhat of eyecatching. Jaejoong is an amazing singer with his rainbow like angel voice. He has a gorgeous face which Changmin sure that he'll be the 'face' of any group TVXQ ent will make in future. And sometimes, Changmin can said that jaejoong is really an angel among all trainees. He can cook the best meals which can be eat for human! For God's sake! In the next second, Changmin sighed.
After that, Changmin looked at Yunho who still sat next to jaejoong and whispered at the smaller sometimes. Yunho is the best rapper and dancer Changmin have ever seen. He always makes his fans (fans, yeah.. he already has fans though he was still trainee) screams like hell everytime his body move with or without music. His leadership is also the best among all. Changmin admit it. Though Yunho is not the oldest among all, he is the only who can make them one for instant. He has somewhat of natural leader aura. Everyone like Yunho will be needed the most from each groups. Again, Changmin let out a small sighs.
The tall switched his glance to Yoochun, the crybaby from trainees of TVXQ entertainment. He has a good ability for dancing, singing, composing song and even writing lyrics. He has dozens of songs which made by his self. That cassanova person is a great and yet sensitive moodmaker. In simple way, Changmin should tell if every group should have Yunho like person as a leader, they also need Yoochun like person as the right hand of Yunho like person. They are the best in leading, caring and unite every inch of the group's members.
Again and again. Changmin sighed in defeat. He really had no natural talent unlike the 4 extraordinary men in same entertainment. Other trainees can do everything he can do, but not vice versa. Changmin had to do his best to survive here with many killer instructor. And his hard work is quite good so far. The Trainee's Final Musical Show to show their grew up talent was about 2 week and he already got his instructors' recommendation before perform.
"Hey!", Changmin nearly choked when someone patted his shoulder as he drank his water.
"What the fu-huh? Jaejoong hyung? What's your problem huh? Wanna kill me?", asked Changmin sarcastically while Jaejoong just giggled at him.
"I saw you sighed many times today. Want to share it with me?".
Changmin sighed again. "Its just a sigh hyung. It's not a big de-".
"Everytime you let out a sigh, your happiness will be decreased one by one", said Jaejoong with his loving smile.
Changmin growled. Had he said that that jaejoong is a mother like person in a way?
oOo
Changmin stare at his fiancee who was reading his musical score in her wheel chair with a heavy heart. His heart pang a bit as his eyes met his fiancee's pale face. He was aware of his fiancee's face that become paler from time to time. Changmin sighed and went straight to his fiancee.
He run toward his lover. Didn't afraid to get caught by his fiancee as if she heard his foot steps. Because his lover could never hear him. His lover couldn't hear anything. His fiancee was a deaf mute with chronic heart disease. And its also which made her stay in the wheel chair all day. She is supposed to having bedrest until doctor allow her to do daily activities normally.
"Ouch!", Changmin pouted as his hands which he used to close his fiancee's eyes was striked lightly.
His fiancee turn back in her seat and look happily at him. She doesn't say anything but smile lovingly at her lover. Soon after that, she made some gesticulation. 'Mischievous Lord Voldemin!'
Changmin smiled back and replied with sign language just like what his fiancee did before. 'Sorry love.'
'I'm curious how will this scores sounds alike. Is it fun to listening music Min?', said his fiancee in sign language.
Changmin let out a small chuckles and continue, 'Kinda. But sometimes you'll find it better to locked your ears out Su. Its not like everything we heard will make us happy Su.'
Kim Junsu, that's Changmin's lover name. A beautiful, cute and shining figure even with her condition now. His Junsu always shining like nothing else.
Junsu made more gesticulation, 'I want to watch you in your final show.'
Changmin quirked an eyebrow. 'But I want to know how well you dance and sing. Are you better than Max from Tohoshinki or not', Junsu giggled.
Changmin groaned in silent. 'Aish. Whatever you said Shim Junsu, like you ever know him in person.', Changmin replied.
Junsu sticked out his tongue. 'No, but I like him. He's such a gorgeous man ever.', said Junsu again.
Changmin tsk-ed and stay silent. Junsu pouted. But Changmin didn't give any attention but nonchalantly said, 'Stupid duckbutt'.
Junsu knew that Changmin was jealous over that Max person so she thought harder to take mind off Changmin. After some thoughts, Junsu kissed his fiance on his lips then made more gesticulation. Changmin looked at them carefully by the corner of his eyes to catch what his lover said. 'Lunch?'
Changmin laughed for a second and said, 'Sure. Let me bring you there'.
Changmin smiled slightly. His lover really know how to manage his jealousy.
oOo
Bogoshipda nae sarang nae nunmul gateun saram
I miss you my love, a person like my tears
Haneobsi heullyeodo niga dasi bogosipda
Though it flows endlessly, I still miss you like crazy
oOo
it was a day before the show. Changmin tried hard to move his body as the music playing. His hands were numb and he felt like going to faint soon. It already a week since Junsu have been hospitalized and he got so tired. But not long after the music started to play, the instructor suddenly turn off the music.
"What the hell are you doing with that legs huh?! Shim Changmin! Get of!", instructor Lee shout at Changmin. Everyone gasped when heard it while Changmin was taken aback. It's the first time instructor Lee ever shouted at any trainees here. But somehow, Changmin's exhaustion suddenly gone after that.
Changmin stood still. He had no idea about what he had to do right now.
"What are you doing? Get off now Changmin. I don't need any trainee who can't even focus on what they doing.", instructor Lee snorted.
Changmin looked at instructor Lee with plea but his istructor seems too mad to even hear what Changmin said while go out from the hall. "Instructor Lee, I.. I just-".
Everyone stared at the tall guy quizzically. Well, It's the first time a hard working changmin got warning from any instructor.
'Is it fun to listening music Min?'
'I want to watch you in your final show.'
Suddenly, Junsu's words popped out in his mind and he felt his heart skipped a beat and his body turned numb again.
"Baby.."
oOo
Instructor Lee folded his arms and stared at Changmin gloweringly while the tall man still bow down on his back, apologizing.
"What is it now?" asked instructor Lee monotonously.
"Please.. Instructor Lee.. please.. give me one more chance and i won't make you disappointed anymore. But please, give me a chance to take part for final show sir. Please. I beg you sir.", implored Changmin.
Instructor Lee exhaled then finally said, "Well then. I'll give you another chance to take part in final show tomorrow. But you won't take part in dance. One more, you'll only sing in the show with no dance, no matter what.".
Changmin taken aback and rounded his eyes in disbelief. He stared his instructor with pleading eyes. But that was final and Changmin can do nothing except accept it half-heartedly.
"Now get your ass out of here and prepre yourself for sing at the last rehearsal.", said Instructor Lee
oOo
"Yunnie, do you know where is Changmin? I've been looking for him but can't find him", asked Jaejoong to Yunho.
Yunho bent his eyebrows. "Changmin just going out a minute ago Joongie. He was kinda in rush", said Yunho.
Jaejoong tsk-ed then replied, "Aish! That brat really.."
"What happened?", asked Yunho curious.
"That Changmin left before I can talk to him. Tomorrow is our final show but that brat just disappear right after the last rehearsal whereas I still need to talked to him about his costume's size. And the most important thing is about instructor Lee", jaejoong huffed then pouted his cherry lips.
"What is it?", replied Yunho curiously.
Jaejoong let out a heavy sigh before replied, "Instructor Lee want him to perform nothing tomorrow."
And Yunho widened his eyes with that statement.
oOo
Changmin stood still in front of emergency room. Junsu's father already told him to sit down for a while but the tall man just refused it politely. Some moments later, nurse came out and looked for Junsu's family. Changmin immediately rushed to the nurse before Junsu's parents. "I'm his Fiancee.", said him half-loudly. And in the next second, Junsu's parents came.
"We're Junsu's parents.", said Mr Kim while holding his wife who still crying and sobbing hard.
The nurse smiled at the three and look at to Junsu's parents. "This way please. The doctor need to talk to both of you before we can do anything needed.". said the nurse then let both of Junsu's parents get in the room.
"Dad..", Changmin called his soon-to-be-father-in-law. Mr Kim smiled at Changmin then patted Changmin's shoulder, said that everything will be alright then get into emergency room with his wife.
Changmin managed to sit down when the nurse closed the door. He inhaled deeply to calmed down himself. In his head, he cursed himself to be this careless for Junsu. If he didn't come to rehearsal for final show tomorrow, his fiancee state won't turn this bad. If he was able to make instructor Lee give him permit to skip rehearsal. If he didn't make any fault before so instructor Lee will give him permission easily. If... If..
Multiple random things filled Changmin's head as guilty keep stab his chest just like a sharp knife and made him can't breath properly. He murmured thousand wish for his beloved fiancee, his half and his mate to be saved. 'God please save him. Please save my other half.'.
oOo
Naui nun sogae gaseumae sala issneun neo
You live in my eyes and always stay inside my heart
Dasi neol an-eul su issdamyeon
I wish I could hold you once again
oOo
Junsu opened her eyes slowly and narrowed her eyes as she rocognise a white room and the familiar scent of the hospital. "Min..", Junsu called Changmin with his hoarse voice. Changmin immediately came to his lover next to her bed when she hear her voice. His Junsu just wake up!
"Yah yah! Don't even try to move your fucking pinky okay? You just awake baby for God's sake. I was run like a fucking crazy dog as your maid said that you was here. And believe me, Junho will be here in some hours.". Junsu had to supress his chuckles when she hear all of Changmin's word in a second. Changmin never talk that much but in every matter which include Junsu. Junsu felt loved so much. And absolutely she is the luckiest girl ever to have Changmin, Junsu thought and yet couldn't help but smiled widely. None of them spoke but the air between them is somehow show how much the two loved each other and nothing needed to be said.
Changmin smiled in relieve and held back his sob when he saw the smile on his lover. This is enough. To see Junsu is alive and smile to him is more than enough to live his life. Because Junsu is his world.
oOo
It was 3 hours before the show and Changmin still didn't appear yet. Instructor Lee let out a sigh and chuckles while saw every trainee was busy preparing themselves for the show. But the little smile vanished from his face in a second when he saw Changmin run for his life toward him.
"What are you doing Shim Changmin?", asked instructor Lee. Well, hadn't Changmin know that he can't join in the show? Instructor lee raised an eyebrow.
Changmin tried to say something while managed to breath. Suddenly he kneelt down in front of his instructor. "Mr Lee. Please. This is my last wish. I beg you. Please let me join the final show i beg you.", said Changmin as he look at his instructor with pleading eyes. He really need to perform today. He will pay that at any price as long as he can perform and show that to his Junsu.
Mr. Lee raise an eyebrow before finally he shook his head and inhaled a deep breath. "You were my favorite trainee Changmin ah. Your singing is really no joke. But recently you didn't give any fuck about our final show. Are you look down at it or else? I just don't need trainees who take lightly everything i said to them"
"Mr Lee i beg you. Please let me join in", Changmin beg more and more to his instructor.
Mr Lee let out a heavy breath and groan in frustation. "Okay! you can join in. Hurry up and meet Jaejoong then prepare yourself. Its my fucking last trust which i give you", said him and leave Changmin who smiled brightly after heard his decision.
"Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much Mr Lee. Thanks alot!" Changmin bows deeply to his instructor before run towards Jaejoong who stand not far behind him and mouthed him, 'hurry up'.
Jaejoong playfully hit Changmin's shoulder and congratulate him.
"You are such a lucky jerk"
oOo
Changmin smiles genuinely when his gaze meet his parents' who cheered at him happily. And there also Junho, Junsu's brother who sit right beside his father and hold a camera to record his performance. They waves and yell out Changmin's name. Changmin chuckled.
He closed his eyes and started to sing as the musical continue.
Geuriun saranga nae saranga nal dorabol suneun eomni
I miss you my love, my love, can't you turn around and look at me?
Ipsuri dartorok neol bulleo bwado daheul su eomnabwa
I call out to you till my lips are chapped but it doesn't reach you
Sesang eoneu gose isseodo nan neoreul chajagalge
Wherever you are, I will go search for you
Sumi meotneun geu nari wado nan neoreul gidaryeo
Even when the day I stop breathing comes, I will wait for you
Dasi saranghago sipeo michidorok geuriun saranga
I want to love you again, my love, whom I miss crazily
Nae saranga~
My love~
Everyone there couldn't hide their amazement when Changmin finished his singing, most of them even gave standing applause for the man. But Changmin didn't pay attention at them as he get to the back stage and look to the empty seat next to his father and his mother who start to cry hard after talking to someone God knows using her handphone while his father hugged his wife tightly to calmed down his wife.
He didn't know what happened but suddenly he heard a stunning yet soft murmuring voice echoed in his head but soon lost like a wind. 'Mischievous Lord Voldemin, i love you.'
And that time he really could feel his body turn numb and his heart sting while he can't even breath because of the pain. He wish to die instead to know such pain in his life. He never wish to know it and never ever want.
oOo
Changmin held Junsu's soft yet cold hand and squeeze it a bit. It used to be warm everytime Junsu touched him and cupped his face or everytime their hands entwined. He kissed Junsu's cold yet pale lips which used to be juicy and has cherry like colour which made him want to kiss it all the time. He rubbed Junsu's cheeks which used to be warm and get reddish everytime he kissed it lovingly.
Changmin took a deep breath and forced a smile as he look at his Junsu. He chuckled and covers his mouth from escaping sob then kissed Junsu's closed eyes full-heartedly. His chest felt heavy and hurt at the same time. It was like his every heart beat turned into hurtful stabs on his chest. His throat felt sore and mute but he forced to whisper something in Junsu's ear with croaked voice.
"You don't watch my performance yet. Guess what Su, i got standing applause for my performance. But Junho didn't record my performance until the end cause he ran here for you.", a tears flowing on his cheeks and a sob escape from his mouth as Changmin finished his sentences. Changmin inhaled deeply and held back his tears before turn on the camera and playing the video of his performance which Junho took before.
Bara bonda nae sarang manjil suga eobseodo
I look at you, my love, though I can't touch you
Geu eolgul geu nunbit apeudorok bara bonda
I painfully look at that face, at those eyes
Naui nunmuldo sangcheodo anajun saram
The only person who embraced my tears and my scars
Sesange neo hanayeotjanha
In this world, it's you alone
Geuriun saranga nae saranga nal dorabol suneun eomni
I miss you my love, my love, can't you turn around and look at me?
Ipsuri dartorok neol bulleo bwado daheul su eomnabwa
I call out to you till my lips are chapped but it doesn't reach you
Sesang eoneu gose isseodo nan neoreul chajagalge
Wherever you are, I will go search for you
Sumi meotneun geu nari wado nan neoreul gidaryeo
Even when the day I stop breathing comes, I will wait for you
Dasi saranghago sipeo michidorok geuriwo
I want to love you again, I miss you crazily
Baramcheoreom neoui gyeote isseulge boiji anhado
Like the wind, I will be by your side
Yeongwonhi neoreul jikyeojulge
Though you can't see me, I will protect you forever
Changmin keep caressing Junsu's smooth hair and watched her closed eyes which would never open and shine again before he heard the video stops. His endless tears keep flowing on his cheeks but he didn't care. He never want to care everything again but his Junsu.
Changmin smiled bitterly and hold his sob as as he can and ignore the pain which like stabbing his chest and hurt him as hell, "baby.. you didn't watch it until the end, right? I will sing it to you instead. Is it okay? Now you can hear me right, Su?". Changmin held back his sob and tears then began to sing in very low tone with his croaked voice next to his Junsu's ear while continue to caress her straight hair. Hopefully junsu can hear him by now. Hopefully too he could locked his ears out and ignore the world around him who already asked him to stop hugging his lover even after she passed away 3 days ago which Changmin preferred to call as a 'long sleep' instead.
Saranghae saranghae gaseumi teojige bulleodo neon deutji motani
I love you, I love you – I call out to you till my heart bursts, can't you hear me?
Sesang eoneu gose isseodo nan neoreul chajagalge
Wherever you are, I will go search for you
Sumi meotneun geu nari wado nan neoreul gidaryeo
Even when the day I stop breathing comes, I will wait for you
Dasi saranghago sipeo michidorok geuriun saranga
I want to love you again, my love, whom I miss crazily
(˘▽˘sʃƪ
-FIN-