Title song by Old Dominion
No Such Thing As A Broken Heart
Hizashi's skin was still crawling in the most unpleasant way as his mind conjured the feeling of thousands of tiny legs and slimy bodies covering and irreversibly violating him. He wanted nothing more than to burn his clothes in a giant pyre and then take the longest, hottest shower that he could manage to try and banish the memory of that afternoon. Sadly, his desires would have to wait as duty continued to call and his feet carried him back to the teachers' office while his skin trembled and his muscles shuddered.
Pushing open the door with a heavy, bone weary sigh, Hizashi was both relieved and suddenly furious that the room was only occupied by one other person. Leaning carelessly back in his office chair right next to Hizashi's, the man known to the public as Eraserhead had his head tilted back as he administered a couple of medicated eyedrops to each of his red-rimmed eyes.
"I hear you were bested by a bunch of bugs. I'm sure that was a graceful sight to behold and I'm sorry I missed it." Shouta's voice was its usual disinterested monotone as he leisurely recapped his eyedrop bottle, seemingly unconcerned that Hizashi was standing stock still in the doorway glaring daggers at him through the orange tint of his glasses.
Marching over to the dark haired man, intentionally making his footsteps stomp louder than usual, Hizashi was moderately pleased to see those tired eyes finally turn his way before flashing with a moment of uncertain alarm as Hizashi grabbed Shouta by the scarf and yanked him forward. The kiss was all harsh, punishing teeth fueled by a desperate fear as Hizashi braced one knee on Shouta's chair to gain leverage for the moment. Warm, callused hands reached up to cover Hizashi's still gripping that signature scarf and gently coax them into relaxing their hold.
"Hey," Shouta's voice, tinged with a hint of hoarseness, was like a cool balm to Hizashi's fervor and suddenly all of the fight left his body as he released Shouta's lips. The blond leaned their foreheads together, his eyes refusing to open against the pain still flooding his chest from seeing Shouta sitting there taking care of his damaged eyes. "What's wrong?"
Letting out a large breath that he'd been unconsciously holding, Hizashi reached up to remove his headphones, glasses, and amplifier to set them on Shouta's desk before fully straddling his boyfriend's lap and folding him into a tight hug. They sat like that for several minutes, Shouta patiently holding onto his crazy blond as Hizashi focused on breathing in the comfortably familiar scent of the man in his arms.
"I was always afraid for you every time you went out, even before…" Hizashi trailed off as he raised his head from Shouta's shoulder, his eyes wandering over to the scar under Shouta's right eye as his thumb brushed lightly over the slightly raised skin.
"Before I got the shit beat out of me?" Shouta helpfully supplemented, quirking the corner of his lips in cheeky humor.
The annoyed flick to his forehead was well deserved, especially considering Hizashi hadn't left his bedside after that incident until he'd stumbled out of it to make it to class on time. Astonished disbelief had followed, partly because Hizashi's lazy sleeping bag slug was bandaged more than a mummy and still dragging himself to school but mostly because Hizashi was trying to figure out how Shouta could see where he was going.
"Yes, thank you for bringing that up." Hizashi glared before shaking his head. "I always worried about you, but now that your eyes are worse there's just that many more opportunities for a villain to get a jump on you because you have to blink more often and every time you use your quirk it's doing more damage to your eyes and what if someday you go blind and have to get one of those stick thingies or a seeing eye dog or-" A soft whooshing sound preluded Shouta's scarf coming to life and wrapping itself several times around Hizashi's head to cover his mouth.
Amusement lit up Shouta's eyes and all traces of it left Hizashi's as they stared at each other. It was a familiar position that they were in, although they usually had much less clothing on, and Hizashi had to grudgingly concede that it was probably a good thing that he was shut up before he rambled on for forever.
"Now that I can get a word in edgewise." Hizashi would have nipped that smug smirk right off of Shouta's face if he could. "For as much as you worry about my eyes, Present Mic, how do you think I feel about the fact that all anyone has to do to you is this and you're powerless?" Shouta tugged on the scarf to emphasize his point.
Dark brown eyes were the most serious that Hizashi had ever seen them as they stared unflinchingly into emerald green that were beginning to tear up. As a feather light kiss was placed on his neck right over his vocal chords, Hizashi felt his eyes close in defeat as he remembered that it wasn't just Shouta who ran towards danger rather than away. Reaching up to run his fingers through midnight black tresses, Hizashi used his other hand to pull down the scarf around his mouth with no resistance as Shouta released whatever hold he had over it.
"I am more than just my quirk, you know." Hizashi pointed out quietly as the scarf fell around his shoulders.
"As am I." Shouta countered, batting at his own scarf in mild irritation as it fell in his face before readjusting it around Hizashi's neck to act as a pillow for his head as he snuggled back down.
"I'm still going to worry about you." It had to be said, even if Shouta already seemed too comfortable to comprehend any words. Despite the awkward position that allowed one office chair to accommodate two grown men, Shouta seemed far too content for Hizashi's soft heart to disturb. With a put upon huff and a pet to the head nuzzled into his neck, Hizashi decided to put up with it for a while longer.
"I know." Shouta mumbled from somewhere under Hizashi's chin. "We're both going to keep worrying and we both know that there's always the chance that one of us won't come back someday. That's just the life that we chose to live." A tear ran unbidden down Hizashi's cheek as he bowed his head over Shouta's, the truth in those words was always present in the back of his mind but kept at bay as much as he could manage.
He knew, deep down in the dark recesses of his heart, that the chances of what they had shattering in an instant was high considering the line of work that they were in. He was always busy when Shouta was out on a mission, doing anything and everything to keep his mind occupied and not staring at his phone waiting for the call that would break his heart. The thought that the same fear plagued his love's mind whenever he himself was away made Hizashi want to break down into tears.
It wasn't fair that their relationship had that darkness looming over it for as long as they remained heroes, but it was also an undeniable unspoken truth that neither of them could be anything else. It made them who they were, it made them the person that the other had first fallen in love with, and that made it all the more precious. Maybe they would make it together to the end and see their memories fade, their hair grow light, and their hands that would still hold onto each other gain a few more wrinkles. There was always that hope that Hizashi had to cling onto, the hope that he'd be allowed to grow old with the man that he'd been so desperately in love with ever since he was fifteen.
"I would die for you, you know, but you're also the one person that I would fight tooth and nail to live for." Shouta's voice was barely audible, making Hizashi wonder if he was even awake anymore as he felt his heart painfully seize for an instant before melting into a gooey blob that stuck to the insides of his ribcage.
The gentle snoring coupled with the steady rise and fall of Shouta's back told Hizashi that his boyfriend had indeed left the world of consciousness. Hugging the love of his crazy, insane life close, Hizashi couldn't help the tiny laugh of disbelief. Here he'd been thinking that there was no way that he could possibly fall any further in love than he already was, but Shouta seemed to have proven him wrong.