TITLE: Not Enough
AUTHOR: JackValentine
BETA: residentreject619
PAIRING: Mike "The Miz" Mizanin/Kevin "Alex Riley" Kiley
RATING: R
GENRE: Songfic, angst, romance
SIZE: Mini
WARNINGS: None
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Three Days Grace – Time of Dying. I think it's a perfect song for this pairing!
DISCLAIMER: Do not own the guys (I wish I did ^^)
Alex winced as he felt the steel stairs against his back. Actually it wasn't as painful as it looked and as it could be, because Mike was very gentle. But the touches of Miz's hands on Riley's face and on the back of his head hurt him the worst. Mizanin was way too careful, those touches reminded Alex of the times, when they touched not only in the ring. Despite that Mike tried to make their contact as formal and cold as possible, A-Ry's skin was nonetheless burning under his fingers, his body aching, begging for more, and denying the fact that it was impossible. Alex was torn apart by each and every second of this show, of this fake, of this dirty action, but it was still better than seeing Mike avoiding him and acting like a total stranger.
The storylines changed and made their life change as well.
Mike said it will get too complicated. Mike said he didn't want this relationship to continue. Mike said he didn't love Alex anymore. He lied.
On the ground I lay
Motionless in pain
I can see my life flashing before my eyes
Did I fall asleep?
Is this all a dream?
Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare
I will not die
I will survive
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
I feel alive when you're beside me
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
In my time of dying
Alex was lying on the creased bed and naked Elise was sleeping next to him. Never before has she abhorred Riley so much. A-Ry knew that it was not her fault that his attempts to prove himself that he can live, sleep and fuck without Mike failed. But Alex couldn't fight his growing disgust. Riley knew, that the closer he gets to Elise, the more estranged he becomes to Mike.
He was finally home. But it didn't feel like home, it felt like a useless empty place. Alex overturned on his back, not finding a comfortable position in the bed. And in his life neither.
Riley gets up abruptly, packs his clothes and leaves, not hearing Elise shouting: "Kevin, where the fuck are you going?"
Mike said they got way too close to each other. Mike said it was too much.
He was right. It was too much. But still not enough.
On this bed I lay
Losing everything
I can see my life passing me by
Was it all too much?
Or just not enough?
Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare
I will not die
I will survive
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
I feel alive when you're beside me
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
In my time of dying
Alex rang the doorbell of the suite and heard the quick steps.
- Alex?
Mike seemed quite surprised, but he did good job of not losing control.
All the planned speech faded from Riley's mind. They used to be in love, they used to be inseparable, they used to be one and now Mizanin calls him by his ring name. Alex felt a prick in his heart. He went in and closed the door, making the brunette step back.
- I'm not Alex. At least not for you.
Miz kept stepping back as A-Ry was approaching him, until he stumbled on the wall with his back. Mike's heart was beating that hard and fast, that Alex could hear it. It served as a signal for him, showing that Mizanin wasn't indifferent, that he cared. The blonde took one more step. Now they were face to face. Suddenly, Mike, slowly and uncertainly, wrapped his arms around Riley's neck and then, finding out that the blonde leaned in to the touch, snuggled to him and buried his face in the bigger man's shoulder.
- Kevin. For me you will always be Kevin.
Kevin stepped back and kissed Mike's lips softly, deepening the kiss as he felt Mike opening his mouth slightly and unzipping the bigger man's hoodie. Miz's hands slid under Kiley's t-shirt and he let out a short quiet moan. He missed touching Kevin so much. Despite that they touched each other almost every week, touching like lovers differed a lot from touching like co-workers. Mike's palms moved up Kiley's torso. Mizanin felt goose bumps appearing on Kevin's smooth skin while he was re-exploring every inch. Mike bit his lower lip, catching himself thinking that he missed this feeling too much to linger further, but in the same time he wanted this moment to never end. The blonde moved back a little and took Miz's t-shirt off. Mike shuddered feeling Kevin's hot palms brushing against the sides of his body. Meanwhile Kiley took his own t-shirt off too and embraced Mike, pressing their naked torsos together, elastic muscles rubbing, driving both men insane. Miz nuzzled Kiley's hair, inhaling his aroma. He felt the unbearable, aching tenderness overtaking him, mixing with the mind-blowing lust. Not moving back, his chin still on Kevin's shoulder, Mike started unbuttoning his lover's jeans.
A couple of minutes later they were both completely naked, if not to count Kiley's socks. They didn't have time or will to pay attention to such little things. Kevin was lying on his back on the wide hotel bed and Mike was sitting between his thighs, fingering him slowly and stroking his leg with the free hand. Both men's eyes were closed. Miz scissored his fingers carefully and entered his lover, trying hard not to hurt him, but Kevin still couldn't hold back a short yell. He obviously got tighter. Kiley arched his back as he felt a wave of pain down his spine awakening him, bringing him back to life. Mike bit his lower lip and let out a muffled sound, which was more of a growl than a moan, and started moving his hips slowly, stroking his lover's trembling body, as if he wanted to remember each and every little detail for the rest of his life.
(...)
Mike was dressing up and packing his clothes. Today the WWE superstars were travelling to the next state and Miz was almost ready to leave. He approached the bed, slowly and quietly. Kevin was sleeping on the left side of it; his mouth opened slightly, his eyelashes shivering. Mizanin couldn't resist, but stroked his lover's exposed shoulder with his fingertips and then pulled the blanket higher above. Suddenly, he found himself thinking: "Maybe I should wake him up?.. But he's so beautiful when he sleeps… Damn, I want to kiss him so badly… Maybe I should?.. Because… Because I want to". For Mike it was easier to think that he does everything because "he wants to", but he still couldn't accept, that he had some feelings to Kevin. "Feelings"… Miz grinned sadly and walked the door.
(...)
- But Mike…
Kevin obviously ran out of arguments.
- Kevin, we just can't.
Now Kiley remained silent, but his grip on Mike's forearm was still tight.
- Let me go! What if somebody sees us?
- Mike…
Kevin had no words left; he was just dully repeating the other man's name, not really hoping it would help. Mike took a deep breath and stepped closer to Kiley.
- Kev… I don't love you. I never did. – Miz said with a sigh, avoiding the bigger man's sight.
- You're lying – Kevin whispered trying not to lose his cool, but nonetheless he faltered in the middle of the phrase.
- Just let me go… Please… Please?.. – He touched A-Ry's tensed palm with the fingertips of his free hand, making him weaken the grip slowly.
As Kevin finally lost his grip, Mike seemed to keep his hand on Kiley's a little longer than he could've, but then he turned around quickly and hurried to the lobby.
- I will always be waiting for you… - Kevin hissed quietly.
Mike didn't seem to hear.
Kevin thought he could get Mike back. Kevin thought they could be the same.
He was mistaken. But he will be always waiting.
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
I feel alive when you're beside me
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
In my time of dying.