Law and Order Criminal Intent is not mine, never was, never will be.
It's how big?...
Bobby was just minding his own business, and went into the interrogation observation room to retrieve a file he left there. He entered the door, eyed the folder and picked it up. He was about to walk back out when he heard faint mumbling from the speaker. He turned to look through the one-way mirror and saw Alex, Meghan Wheeler and Alicia Pearson talking. They were talking low and looked like they were conspiring about something.
He couldn't help it. He turned the volume up.
"...C'mon. You mean to tell me you think his is the biggest in the squad?" Pearson asked smirking
"I do. I fully believe that. I mean..have you seen him? Have you seen the way he talks to people? Especially women?" Wheeler asked. She shook her hands back and forth. "No, No...my friends. Logan's is the biggest."
By now Goren was astonished. He was riveted. It was at that moment that the Captain walked in. "..Goren..?" He looked between Goren and the window. "What the hell are you doing..." Goren was speechless and started to open his mouth when Ross saw his female detectives huddled around the table with coffee, looking like the cats who at the canary.
"I'll let you in on a secret." Alex whispered
Now the Captain couldn't help himself. He even turned the volume up.
"Gorens is the biggest." She crossed her arms in front of her.
Bobby's mouth dropped open. He flushed with embarrassment...but also a little bit of pride. (He even puffed his chest out a little.) He snuck a look at the Captain who looked as though he was caught naked in front of his squad.
"Goren...How THE HELL would Eames know how big your..."
"OK, Ok. How do you know?" Wheeler asked Eames
"C'mon. You guys. He's always bragging. Saying things like..'cmon Eames..you know I'm the best. Or..we're so good together because of me." She snorted. "Yeah. Like he could do it by himself".
Goren was more than a little perturbed now. First of all, he couldn't believe the words coming out of his partners mouth. Second of all...
"Well. OK. Who's do you think is bigger? Goren's or the Captains?" Pearson asked
The Captain was stunned. He looked at Goren uncomfortably.
They both shifted on their feet.
Now Goren didn't know what to do. Should he make a run for it? Or should he wait to hear what they said. Boy the Captain will be mad when he finds out...
"The Captains. By far". Eames said.
Goren looked wounded. The Captain looked elated.
"I mean, before he got here I heard it was so big he might have trouble fitting through the door." Eames said.
Goren and Ross simultaneously covered their mouths with their hands.
The women laughed and finally Pearson stood to leave. Eames threw her hands up in the air and said "Alright, alright. Let's just leave here and at least agree on one thing. All the MALE detectives in this squad have big egos." They all laughed and walked out.
Ross and Goren turned to look at each other. Goren turned towards the door and mumbled
"I've got to go get this..."
""Yeah. I've got a meeting with the chief. Uh..."
"Right. OK." and Goren held the door open for the Captain.
Goren was relieved in a way. How would he explain to the Captain that Eames knew how big his...
- end-