Chapter 1-

"What happened to living with Eren and everyone?" I asked my brother, hands on my hips. He didn't meet my eyes. His black hair had grown so it hung in his face, partially hiding his expression.

"Well? I told you to stay with them and stay safe while I started training. Doesn't seem like you listened to me- but then what's new?" a smile twitched his lips.

"Listen, Nova, you don't need to baby me anymore. I am surviving just fine on my own." My hand automatically reached out and cracked across his arm, leaving a red mark just under where his sleeve cut off. He didn't flinch though, which is good at least. He didn't rub the spot that must have been stinging like hell, so his carefully built up composure still holds. Good. I looked around. The place was really small- a hut really. There was next to no light as the sun had already fallen below the horizon- or below the wall at least. Yet even in what little light there was, I could make out a makeshift bed and a sink containing a few dirty dishes next to the stove. A pile of dirty laundry dominated the floor and the smell wasn't pleasant.

"Yeah, I can see that." The sneer was automatic too. His eyes narrowed.

"Why did you come here if you're just going to be all bitchy and judgemental? I'm alive aren't I?" Good point…. With a sigh my shoulders stiffened.

"Well, sorry... I know you only have a few more months and you'll be joining me at the cadet camp but thinking about you alone pisses me off. I didn't protect you for this long just so you could throw it all away." He sprawled back on his bed, chewing on what looked like bread. He didn't answer for a while, so I sat next to him. I had never been the kind of sister that said sweet words and was all comforting and emotional. Especially after what happened in Shiganshina. But this was important, so I swallowed the bile at the back of my throat and managed to stutter out

"I-I'm just worried about you is all – I- I love you Caden, Please tell me you- You're not always alone." That earned me a punch, but I didn't flinch either.

"Ugh I thought cadet training was supposed to toughen you up not make you all soppy. No I'm not always alone- jeez. But seriously sis- I think you've been off the streets too long." I smirked at him. This was the Caden I knew. This was the Caden I had raised.

"Oh yeah? Well, seeing as its Christmas and all, I thought we could go out for a bit and see everyone. I haven't seen them in ages. But before that, I'll make food while you tidy up. And try to put something nice smelling in the- actually everywhere. It stinks in here." That earned me another shove but he got up and did as I told him, starting with lighting a scented candle then setting to work on the laundry.

"Where did you get the scented candle? Even our commander doesn't have one of those…" I asked, my eyes narrowed. Caden smile and gave me an innocent expression back.

"You stole it didn't you…" he shrugged. Meh… as long as he didn't get caught. You gotta do what you gotta do when you're living under the poverty line. I cleaned his pitifully few dishes then got my Christmas present for him out of my bag and got cooking. Mum actually taught me quite a lot in the way of cleaning and housekeeping- in an effort to girly me up I think. So I know how to cook pretty well and I know how to keep things clean- I was just so used to rebelling against her that I have a habit of just not doing it any more, and after- since it was just me and Cay in shiganshina it didn't really matter anymore. I waited until my brother was done clearing up then I turned around, a plate in each hand.

"Where the hell did you get that!?" his mouth already watering at the sight of the plateful of fresh meat and salad sandwiches. I know it's not exactly cooking but I didn't exactly have much to work with…

"I bought it. It's good quality too- wasn't cheap. Had to save up pretty much all of my cadet allowance pretty much since I started. Happy Christmas Cay." His mouth was slack and he reached for the plate, biting into the food. The look on his face was pure bliss and was enough to make me laugh. We sat for a while in silence, enjoying the savoury juiciness of the meat and listening to the noises outside while the candles flickered. I couldn't get over how good that food was either, so even when we finished we just sat there for a bit- relishing the taste and not even wanting to drink anything or the flavour would disappear. A knock on the door disturbed our peace. Caden looked like he was hiding a smile, but didn't move, so I rolled my eyes and got up.

"Whatever you want- it can wait… I'm having a- Armin!" the blond grinned at me.

"Long time no see, Nova. How's training?" I couldn't help smiling back- I hate smiling but Armin's are infectious.

"Good! Good... I can't wait for you guys to join me. It will be much more interesting with you lot to keep me out of trouble." A dry voice said

"We have Eren to worry about. It's hard enough keeping him out of trouble, I'm sure your new friends will take responsibility for you." My eyes lolled to the black haired girl the comment belonged to.

"Thanks Mikasa, I'm really feeling the love." Her eyes slightly narrowed at the evident sarcasm in my voice. But I'm used to that- I mean the girl is nice and all, and a really good fighter but she is way too protective. I mean, I get it. It was kinda Carla's dying wish for her to stay with him but there is such thing as smothering.

"Who says you'll need to worry about me, I'm not your responsibility any more than Armin is." He said. I met his eyes and swallowed my blush.

"Hey, Eren. How have you been?" he grinned back and shoved past the others, wrapping his arms around me. I stiffened and after a second, he did too, drawing back and saying:

"Sorry- I- ugh. Forget it. You guys coming out or what? Caden get your stuff."

~O~

"Where are we even going?" I asked, clutching a crumpled up t-shirt.

"Surely you haven't forgotten the tradition?" Eren asked, his green eyes glinting in the moonlight and his teeth flashed in another smile. My skin stretched as my lips pulled into a smirk.

"Of course not."

The streets were dark, mostly everyone in this part of Trost was asleep by now. We should probably be asleep too- only we weren't. We were running past houses and up small hills. I pushed ahead of them, the cadet training had made me faster and stronger than the four of them, but it didn't matter. I knew the place they were aiming for. The highest point of the city. My legs were only just starting to ache as I neared the place. The one roof in Trost that towered above the others. Tucking the t-shirt into the waistband of my trousers, I started to climb. The stones dug into my fingers and there were some spots that left me stranded for a few seconds but I managed to get up to the tiles quickly. This would have been so much easier if I had been allowed to take the ODM gear away from camp- but no- the bastards wouldn't let us. My heart was beating and I sat on the tiles, waiting for it to slow and for the others to catch up. Mikasa was the first to join me, pulling herself unto the roof with ease. Eren followed, we both grabbed an arm and hurled him very un-graciously onto the roof beside us. I peered over the edge to see how Armin was doing and he wasn't even half way up. He was hugging the wall and shaking.

"Come on Armin! Get your ass up here! If you can't handle this- there's no point in joining the cadets- you may as well go to the fields." His gaze snapped up on me and for an instant I thought it hadn't worked- but then something like a fire lit in his eyes as they scanned for the most logical way to where we were. He began shimmying up and soon enough, he was laying by our feet, panting and damp with sweat.

"Good job, Armin. You made it." Eren patted his shoulder and pulled him away from the edge a bit more in case he ended up falling off. Pulling the shirt out of my waistband, I scrunched it up and lay my head on it, staring up at the stars. It took me a few seconds to realise Caden wasn't with us.

"Oh for fuck sake, where's Cay?" Mikasa scanned around, after a few seconds pointing to a figure running up the street towards us. A minute or two later, my brother crouched beside us, grinning and panting, holding something inside his jacket.

"Can't have a view like this without food." He stated simply, then handed a strip of dried meat to each of us. My grin was wry and I shook my head but accepted it all the same. Then the five of us were lying there, on the highest rooftop in Trost where no light could reach save that of the moon and the stars.

"Wow." We all breathed in unison, staring at the twinkling lights in the sky. I wonder what this view would be like beyond the wall. With earth at my back and miles away from where any light would reach anyway. All I know is, I'm gonna find out. I'm not gonna stay locked up here forever because at the moment this is as free as I can feel. trapped inside a cage yet out of reach of the titans- I'm not sure which one I would rather brave. For now though, this is perfect.

~O~

We had been staring at the stars for half an hour, not saying a thing, when a warm hand grasped mine. I looked over to find Eren, head straight and staring at the sky, but his hand squeezed mine just a little. I felt a little tickle in my stomach as I squeezed back. We stayed like that for a long time- still no one said anything. Then I heard the snores. Propping myself on my elbows, I looked to my left where the other three were all asleep. I glanced down at Eren, whose hand had moved with mine so he didn't have to let go. I nearly jumped, because he wasn't looking at the stars any more. He was looking at me, a small smile playing with his lips.

"Hey." He whispered.

"Hey." I whispered back.

"Come here." He let go of my hand and spread his arm behind me. My expression must have been cautious… or dubious because he added

"They're asleep. Come on I don't know when I'm going to see you again. A hug won't kill you, you know." Rolling my eyes and sighing, I curled myself against him and let him wrap his arm around me. My cheeks felt warm but I ignored them and listened to the sound of his heartbeat. He was only a couple months or so younger than me and he is the only person that has ever been able to coax physical contact -that wasn't a fight- out of me. I missed it. We lay there for a little while longer and when my eyes started to droop, he whispered

"Happy Christmas, Nono." I smiled and yawned.

"Happy Christmas- though I don't think it's technically Christmas any more. Plus, it's getting late. We should wake everyone up and get outta here before we get caught."

"We're awake." I shot away from Eren's side, bolted upright and shrieked

"How long have you been awake? Were you guys even asleep?" they all smiled and shook their heads.

"But now we know that you have gone soft on us and that you two actually do like each other." I growled, looking at Eren who looked just as embarrassed as I felt.

"Guys! That was so not cool." Sulking, I snapped

"We need to go." Caden smirked

"Yeah we heard you the first time." Ugh. Just as I was about to swing myself over the side and start climbing down, a window was flung open a deep voice rumbled

"Who the hell is on my roof? Get off now or I'll make you get off." Eyes wide, I glanced at the panic on the others' faces.

"Shit!" I mouthed. I waited in silence for the window to close then did exactly as I was told, listening to the muffled giggles of the other and thinking I really should get some sleep in before I have to start heading back to camp tomorrow.