A/N: I haven't watched all the episodes of NCIS; I don't have time. But I started reading some AU fanfics and I thought I knew enough about the characters to write my own. This story takes place after Chip frames Tony and after Gibbs' "Margarita Safari". But it ignores the events of Judgment Day or Angel of Death; so Jen is alive and Tony got out of his undercover op in one piece. As always feel free to review.

A Marine's Return

He stormed past Cynthia and into her office; a cup of coffee in his hand. She didn't look up at the sound of her office door banging open; she was used to it by now. She spoke while reading the file in her hands, it was Monday and she was reading the weekend reports. "Yes Special Agent Gibbs?" He didn't answer simply put the coffee on her desk as well as a folder. Without saying a single word or giving a grunt he turned and left the office slamming the door behind them.

She picked up the cup of coffee and took a sip; enjoying the taste. He always gets the good stuff she thought. She set the cup down and picked up the folder; she was assuming that this was the report for the case his team had just closed and moved to put it on the pile on the corner of the desk when she noticed the words Important: Read and reply ASAP. She picked the folder back up and opened it.

The first page was a set of orders from the Marine Corps requesting the service of one Gunnery Sergeant Leroy Jethro Gibbs in Iraq. She laughed; he wouldn't go back, he enjoyed NCIS too much and he didn't support the invasion of Iraq. The second page surprised her it was Jethro's reply: He accepted, he was going to Iraq. The third page was his letter of resignation from NCIS effective at the end of the week and the fourth page was a hand written letter addressed to Jenny and not Director Shepard. It was personal. She picked it up in shaking hands and started to read:

Dear Jenny.

They want me to go back; they said that they needed more sniper and marksman in Iraq. I've decided to accept. I leave for Iraq at the end of the month. I want to tell the team on Friday; my last day.

I need to do this. After I got the letter my first instinct was to respectfully decline; claiming I was needed more at NCIS then in Iraq. But then I started thinking: I have no one to come home to, no one to stay safe for. And more than anything I wanted to go back there, if not back in time. The years I spent as an active Marine were the best in my life, I want that feeling back and this seemed to be the only way to get them back without drowning in memories.

However; I do know that there is a really big chance that I will not come back; and I am fine with that, because like I said I have no one here. My family is gone. If I should die over there I want you to know that I am fine with it, but I do not want to leave without saying a few things:

Tell Abby to breathe; Tony to knock it off; McGee to relax; Ziva to get used to our idioms and Ducky to take care.

I want to die if it is my time, I want to be with my family.

Feel free to write me I will send you a message with where you can send the letters to; feel free to give it to the team as well.

You have my power of Attorney should I be unable to decide upon a treatment for any injury.

You are listed as my next of kin.

I really did love you; still do

You shattered my heart when you left; not that you left but how you left. No words only a letter and crushed flowers.

Consider this my revenge and the only way I will ever be able to figure it out. But I still love you.

I understand that you were also heartbroken but I need you to feel my side of this as I needed to feel your side.

Could you bring Abby some Café-Pow! Sometimes for me?

Love is a hard thing to control, if I get back and if we still love each other: let's give us a try.

Jethro.

She started crying because this letter more than anything told her how much she had hurt him. It also told her that she still loved him. And if he needed to do this; then she would let him. But she wanted to clear the air on some of his assumptions about family. She looked at the clock 1800 hours; everybody should be home by now. She packed up her stuff grabbing a few files and left via the back stairs. Once at home she fell into bed and went to sleep; her sleep plagued by nightmares.

She woke up the next morning and got ready for work in a daze her mind on how to best approach Jethro. She let her detail drive her to work without comment and moved into her office promptly a 0700 hours. She semi-concentrated on paperwork until 0900 hours. She left her office walking to the catwalk and observing Gibbs' team. McGee was working on his computer, Ziva was on the phone and Tony was trying to avoid the massive amount of paperwork he had to do and Gibbs was silently packing his lower desk drawers. Now or never Jen. She told herself. Taking a deep breathe she spoke in a voice loud enough to be heard on the floor below. "Special Agent Gibbs! My office Now!" She turned without looking at reactions from the floor below. She had just barely sat herself back behind her desk when he stormed into her office.

"Yes director?"

"As your boss I am approving your leave of absence to serve your country abroad and you may file for reinstatement upon your return: you're too good of an agent to let go. However: As your friend I want to ask you some questions if I may?" He nodded that she could so she started. "Question 1: did you mean what you wrote?"

"Every word, director."

"Okay. Do you want to come back?"

"Home or NCIS?"

"Either"

"I have no home and I don't think I can work at NCIS any longer; so no."

"Do you want to die?"

"There is no easy answer to that question."

"Just tell me Gibbs."

"Some days, yes and others no. Some days I want to live to catch more bastards and other days the past bites me in the ass so hard that I feel death would be a relief.

"Okay. Do you really think that you have no family?"

He thought for a moment before answering. "I have no spouse or significant other. My only child has predeceased me. So no I do not have a family."

"Okay Jethro that is bull and you know it. Your team plus Abby and Ducky are your family; sure they're not biologically related to you but that hardly matters. They all think of you as family and on some level so do you otherwise number 1 in your letter would be different. Final question Jethro: Do you really love me?"

"I never really thought that my team could be family I guess. And yes I do still love you. You may have broken my heart but I want to forgive you because I need you. But I also need to do this."

"Okay Jethro I hereby approve of your leave of absence and will help you tell the team in three days' time. Until then make sure all paperwork is completed and on my desk before you leave. To help you achieve this no cases will be assigned to your team until after you leave. Dissmissed."

He left without another word. The next three days were going to be the longest in almost seven or eight years. She went back to her paperwork.