Scene opens on a boardroom. Sitting at it are many members, one of whom is Sir Integra, as well as the Queen at the head. One of the middle managers are finishing up a presentation.

"And in conclusion, the fiscal year ending in June does not allow us to upgrade much of our equipment, which, in my opinion, leaves us with our trousers downs and open for attack."

"Sir Integra, what are your thoughts?"

"Well, in all honesty," Integra says, "I haven't been listening to a word you've been saying for about half and hour now."

"Oh..."

"Furthermore, I've always thought you were incompetent, unintelligent and in general unfit to be a leader within this organization."

"But, but, but..."

"And you all should be ashamed to have such a loud and proud demeanor in front of your Queen Mother." A silence falls on the boardroom. "On that note, anything to add, Your Majesty?"

The whole boardroom turns and looks at the queen.

"... you're a pretty pent up bitch, aren't you?"

Integra blushes.

"Well, since you brought it up, yes, it has been a while since I have had intercourse. But I fail to see how that is supposed to affect my job performance."

"Maybe if you and Alucard had a night of passion together, you'd be the perfect leader."

"Uh...thank you for the suggestion, Your Majesty."

Suddenly, the door opens and Alucard steps in.

"Everyone clear the room! It's an emergency!"

"Emergency?" one of the members asks. "What kind?"

"So the Nazis may have kind of blown up Buckingham Palace..."

"Oh no! What's left?"

"A giant fire ring in the shape of a penis."

"Oh..."

"Yeah, I know...pretty hilarious...anyway, this would be a good time to start your evacuation plan."

"We have one of those?"

"Yep!" Alucard smiles, throwing a piece of paper on the table. As the corners settle, the word 'RUN' in large red letters is written across it.

"Run?"

"Not clear enough?"

"No, no, that's pretty clear."

"Good, good. Now everyone get out!" People begin to scramble out of the room. "Except you, Integra."

"What? Why?"

"You and I are gonna make violent, animalistic love on the boardroom table."

"Must we do this now?"

"Yes, now! The world is end and this may be my last chance at having offspring!" Integra gives Alucard an annoyed look. "...ok, so maybe I just ran out of condoms, but I'm still horny and the world still on its period. You want a hard dicking or not?"

"Ugh, fine!" Integra sighs. "But I want to be on top."

"Yes, ma'am!" he excitedly responds, quickly removing his cloak, vest, tie and shirt. As he tosses them to the side, he attempts to look at Integra doing the same out of the corner of his eyes. She removes her clothing, revealing her white bra and silk thongs. Alucard pauses for a moment, drinking in her beautiful body.

"What?" Integra annoyedly asks, noticing Alucard beginning to stare.

"You know, I may be almost 600 years old, but you always manage to get my motor running."

Integra blushes and looks away.

"...you're just saying that."

"Au contraire, my sweet," Alucard continues, walking towards her. "You are a perfect specimen. Your long thin torso is the pinnacle of perfection. Your legs are like the limbs of the oldest tree. Your breasts are like the ripest island fruit. Your womanhood-" Before Alucard can finish his description, Integra grabs hold of his trousers and rips them off his legs at the seams, throwing them on the other side of the room. "...ok, not gonna lie, that was pretty hot."

"Are you gonna give me a good dicking or I am just gonna watch you stroke my ego all night?" Integra asks as she fondles his soft manhood.

"I'm in!"

"Then shut up and get on the table," she commands, unhooking her bra by shifting her shoulders.

"Goddamn woman, you are quite the vixen, you know that?"

"Can't hear you over the sound of my wet pussy!" Integra sings, ripping her thong in half and tossing it aside.

"Oh fuck yeah!" Alucard exclaims, jumping on the boardroom table and laying on his back.

"Hmm...seems you aren't fully ready yet," Integra comments, flicking his still half-erect penis to the side.

"Hey! Be careful with that! I may be old, but it's still my sensitive area!"

"I'll keep that in mind," she responds, licking the soft ballsack.

"Ohhh yes..." Alucard groans as his cock thickens up. "...that's the way daddy likes it..." Integra works her way up his shaft to the dark red head. She blows on the tip, inciting goosebumps from Alucard. She then deep-throats his whole length, letting her upper lip collide with his pubic bone. "Jesus Fucking Christ!" Alucard exclaims, feeling his member's tender flesh rub against her warm, pulsing esophagus. "That's the way you do it! Play your guitar on the MTV!"

Integra holds her face against him, breathing through her nose and seeping saliva onto her partner's throbbing cock. After a couple of minutes, Integra pulls her face away, gasping for air and leaving behind a fully erect cock and countless streams of warm spit.

"Now you're ready," Integra coos, climbing on top of Alucard.

"I assume you are as well?" Alucard asks, resting his hands on Integra's thighs.

"I suppose so," she responds, rolling her hips on top of his cock.

"Well, should I expect some real action here soon or just foreplay for twenty minutes?" Integra quickly slides Alucard's cock inside her. "Holy fuck!"

"Real enough yet?"

"Ooh, gonna play dirty, are we?"

"Don't tempt me with a good time, Alucard," she answers, rolling her hips back and forth.

"Mmm, where do you get your biting wit and keen sense of timing?" Alucard asks, massaging Integra's thighs.

"You have to-UNGH-know these things-OH-when you're a woman-NGH!" Integra moans.

"Well, then color me impressed!"

As Integra continues her hip action, the door slams open, revealing Seras standing in the doorway.

"Oh, uh, hello Sir Integra. Alucard."

"What do you want?" Integra angrily asks, still rolling her hips.

"Uhm..."

"This is no time for 'uhm.'"

"So we may have a situation."

"I know. Can't you see my current lack of interest?"

"I...I do see that, Sir."

"Then why did you feel the need to drag your imbecilic ass into this boardroom and fill me in on it?"

"I, uh, well, you see, um, the thing is-"

"Listen here, police girl," Alucard interrupts, "everything is on fire, the population number is dropping every second, and war is the black. Whether you like it or not, the world is coming to an end. The only question left to answer is as follows: you want in on a threesome or not?"

Seras gives them a blank stare from her glazed-over eyes, processing Alucard's request and formulating her answer.

"...o-okay..."

Integra turns her body completely around while still being penetrated, inciting a loud grunt from Alucard.

"Ugh! Warn me before you do that!" he exclaims.

Integra grabs hold of Seras' collar.

"I love surprises," Integra responds, immediately kissing Seras, who is initially surprised by the supple lips, but succumbs to them, adding tongue. After a minute, they part to catch their breath.

"Oh, Sir Integra..." Seras sighs.

"Shut up and strip," Integra sternly commands. Gleefully, Seras removes her uniform, exposing her floppy breasts and shimmering, wet pussy lips. "Looks like she's ready, Alucard."

"About damn time!" Alucard yells, shifting his legs and pushing Integra off his hips. "I've waited so long for this. Get those sexy tits over here so I can love on them!"

"Aww! That so sweet!" Seras coos.

"He means with his penis," Integra pipes up, wiping up the liquid dripping from her pussy.

"Oh," Seras sighs.

"Aww, you sound disappointed," Alucard says as he stands up, letting his semi-flaccid cock bounce up and down. "Come on, give daddy some hugs."

Alucard walks towards Seras and she watches as his meaty cock sways from left to right.

"Al-Alucard...I...I didn't know you were so..."

"Handsome? Devilish? In tune with my feminine side?"

"...endowed..."

"Ahh, yes. Oddly enough, not my best quality. Most people would say that's my brimming personality." Seras ignores Alucard's comments, falling to her knees and grabbing hold of the thick cock. She looks it over with impassioned eyes, putting it in her mouth and giving it small strokes. "Wow, you waste, like, zero time, police girl! I like that about you! Always straight to the point! Or in this case, straight to the dick."

"I did the same when I first saw you," Integra adds, stepping behind Alucard to massage his ass and watch Seras over his shoulder.

"Mmm, I can't think of a better way to spend an afternoon then with my two favorite girls," Alucard happily sighs.

"And if police girl didn't have a mouthful of your cock, I'm sure she'd say the same," Integra adds.

"Seriously, where do you girls learn talent like this? Is there some school you all go to? Does it come with just having boobs?" Integra slides her finger into Alucard's asshole. "Hngh!" he flinches. "I told you to warn me before you do that!"

"And I told you I like surprises," Integra slyly responds, sliding the finger in and out of his tight hole.

"Ngh, I'm tired of all this foreplay!" Alucard yells. "Time for me to shine!"

Alucard pushes Seras off his cock and onto the floor.

"Aww, I was really enjoying that!" she yelps.

"I'm sure Alucard's got something else you'll enjoy," Integra says, leading Alucard back on the boardroom table.

"Oh? What's that?"

"Sit on my face and find out," Alucard answers, guiding Integra back onto his cock.

"Okay!" Seras says, walking on her knees over to Alucard's head. "Can I give you a kiss?"

"Please, police girl," Alucard whines, "call me 'daddy'."

"Uh, okay...can I have a kiss, uh, dad?"

"Ugh, just sit on my face," Alucard sighs.

"Okay!"

Seras mounts herself on top of Alucard's head, placing her moist pussy on top of his mouth.

"Now," Integra begins, pounding hard on Alucard with her hips, "I want you to focus on Alucard, but concentrate on me."

"Okay, uhm, how exactly do I do tha-OHMYGOD!" Seris screams as Alucard runs his tongue up and down her warm folds.

"FOCUS!" Integra commands. "CONCENTRATE!"

"I-oh-I don't know-oh-what to concentrate on!" Seras cries.

"Oh, for Christ's sake!" Integra yells, rolling her eyes and grabbing Seras' tits.

"Sir Integra!"

"Oh, shut up and fondle me!" Integra commands.

Seras ignores the command and instead grabs holds of Integra's neck, bringing her in for a kiss. Integra, getting caught up in the passion, wraps her arms around Seras.

"Oh, Integra! I think I'm getting close!" Seras pants.

"Don't you dare cum before me, police girl!" Integra heavily breathes.

"But...but...it's feel so...good!"

"Don't you dare!"

"It's...it's..."

"ARGH! ALUCARD! NOW!"

Alucard thrusts his hips high in the air, penetrating Integra deeper than ever before. She instantly cums, causing her to fall face-first into Seras' breasts, roughly fondling them in the process. This puts Seras over the edge, making her cum and squirt onto Alucard's face. Alucard thrusts faster and harder in an attempt to cum himself. Just as his body is about to give out, he loudly groansm clenches his teeth and squirts his load into Integra. Once he finishes, they all collapse into a pile, attempting to catch their breath.

"Oh...oh my..." Seras gasps. "That was...wow..."

"I agree...Alucard never fails in the sex department," Integra adds.

"Oh, really, it was nothing," Alucard sighs. "I will say this, though. Her Majesty really knows how to plan out a perfect evening for me."

Integra looks at Alucard.

"...what did you say?"

"The Queen Mother planned this whole evening out. The kinky dialogue, the rough sex, the delightful afterglow...all Mum's idea."

Integra eyes widen, completely stunned.

"I...I...uh..."

"And might I say you are well deserving of it," he says, kissing her on the cheek. "Call me sometime. I always enjoy seeing my future wife."

Alucard stands up, closes his cloak and walks towards the door.

"You...you mean..."

"Yep! The world isn't actually ending. Just Germany having an out of control boner for world domination again. Took care of it before I got here."

"What about police girl?!"

"Her? Oh she was in on the whole thing. Something about seeing you naked really makes her horny."

"Are you serious?!" Integra screams.

"Damn right, I'm serious!"

"And now you're just gonna leave!"

"This ain't no Shangri-La, toots! Later!"

Alucard leaves the room, while Integra, still stunned, turns and looks and Seras.

"...do I really turn you on?"

"Absolutely, Sir..." Integra thinks to herself for a moment, then grabs hold of Seras' legs, hoisting them up as she puts her face toward the soaked flesh. "What? Again, Sir? Aren't you still tired?"

Integra smiles.

"...this ain't no Shangri-La, police girl," she responds, lunging toward Seras, looking her straight in the eyes. "And this time...you'll have to focus AND concentrate on me..."

"...oh crud..." Seras gulps, knowing full well her evening was far from over.

-THE END-