Chapter one: the meeting
Safari smiled to herself as she read the letter again, Dear Safari, We request your presence as soon as possible at Hogwarts school of witch craft and wizardry as your excellent reputation as both teacher and defence against the dark arts professor proceeds you, you have been recommended for the defence against dark arts position here by one of my most reliable friends in your field, Remus Lupin, we eagerly await your reply, Albus Dumbledore Safari had replied almost the same day it had come, she couldn't believe she had got the job! She was only 19 and hadn't even attend Hogwarts she'd been home schooled she couldn't believe her luck at being asked to teach at the best school (in her opinion) in the world. She fiddled nervously with her dark auburn hair as the carriage she was in swayed along towards Hogwarts her hair fell in her face again and she wondered why she kept it so long she sighed and looked out the window again and caught sight of the castle and gasped 'wow!' she thought 'it's, well, wow' she thought again as the carriage got closer the castle almost seemed to loom up from the ground stretching to meet the sky 'great I'm going to get lost or fired for sure' looking over the huge castle she could only imagine the amount of rooms and stairs and well whatever else you found in huge, imposing castles to get lost in. The carriage stopped and she clambered out her jeans snagging on the step of the carriage "oh, bugger!" She swore reaching down to un-in tangle herself "oh, hello there" a kind voice reached her ears "I can only assume your Miss Hawthorn, I mean" the voice continued "how many Australian accented red heads do you see in one day?" Safari looked up there was a kind looking long white bearded man standing on the front steps of the castle smiling down at her, he was the kind of person you just wanted to trust right away so, automatically Safari became suspicious of him "g'day you must be headmaster Dumbledore" as she addressed him her gaze found his eyes and her suspicions went right out the window along with her voice, 'what amazing eyes' she didn't know how long they both looked at one and other but finally he seemed satisfied with what he saw "quite correct my dear" he said in that wonderful voice "would you care to meet the rest of the staff?" She smiled at him smoothing her white polo neck down and checking her loose fitting dark blue jeans "sure I'd love to but what about my...." As she turned to view her luggage it was gone "err never mind hey?" She smiled at him again and he returned it full force "now my dear follow me, I'll give you a run down as we walk" she followed his long strides effortlessly 'ah the pleasures of being 5'8' and he began talking again "now you'll get along well with every one I trust but I'm warning you now Severus Snape, the potions teacher and master doesn't like or get along with anyone so your foolish to try and make 'friends' with him, unless of course your up to a challenge or incredibly stupid" She pulled a small face "surely he can't be that bad?" Dumbledore looked at her again "oh he is. But maybe you'll try a bit harder then usual to get to know him?" She considered this a second "well I always have been one for complex people, I'm often told I'm complicated so we might just get along" his lips twitched "who am I to say?" she got the distinct impression he knew some thing she didn't. The door of the staff room swung open before Safari and she stepped in and reviewed the faces before her, she could tell Severus wasn't among them, after all her cousin had given her a detailed description of him, one was a tall severe looking women who immediately smiled ruining her severe face and looking more like a mother than anything else "hello there child it's a pleasure to meet you" said the women "likewise." The rest of the staff smiled introduced themselves and laughed at her jokes and began discussing the missing potions master "where could he be?" The tiny professor Flickwit queried Minerva replied "no doubt he's sulking about something" Dumbledore looked amused "I can quite assure you that he is neither sulking or avoiding Miss Hawthorn he's just being insufferable as always" no one looked more happy at this revolution by the headmaster so Safari decided to do her usual meet and greet quiz witch consisted of a list of questions that they could answer randomly or pass she explained this quietly before starting "does anyone here have a pet?" A few professors waved their hands and she continued "has anyone here ever been arrested?" No one put his or her hand in the air "no? Okay then has anyone here got a tattoo?" Again no one waved their hand she continued for a while before becoming bored after asking for the way to her rooms she suggested they retire "professor Dumbledore may I have the instructions on how to get to Snape's quarters?" It seemed the whole room paused and stilled waiting for the answer "of course" Dumbledore started scratching down some directions on some paper "may I be so bold as to ask why?" Safari wouldn't let them know but it stung just a bit that he hadn't turned up to meet her "well he can try to avoid me but I will purposely seek him out the more he does so. So I'm going to pay him a 'hi it's nice to meet you too' visit" everyone seemed to smile at this explanation "well lets hope you are still mentally intact by morning shall we?" Safari laughed "I shall hope so. Hey you never know we might even be on first name basis by morning" Minerva snickered "I doubt that mans on a first name basis with his mother" Safari bit back a laugh "well I'm going to physically tie myself to a chair and refuse to leave until he tells me all about himself. Or maybe I should tie HIM to the chair" she mused Dumbledore chuckled "have fun Miss Hawthorn" Safari opened the door "oh I will, call me Safari" she waved and started trying to navigate off Dumbledore's map. Dumbledore turned back to the staff who looked expectantly back "shall we see what happens then?" Queried Dumbledore "yes!" The room erupted at once they pulled what seemed to be the glass top of a coffee table out from under one of the lounges and Dumbledore announced in a clear voice "Severus Snape" the surface of the glass glimmered then turned opaque showing a ragged looking Severus Snape in a white button down shirt and plain loose black pants minus his heavy cloak and shoes head resting on his arms hunched over his desk asleep his legs were stuck out from under his desk and the nape of his neck was clearly exposed "well he almost looks relaxed when he's asleep doesn't he?" Minerva said receiving several nods as they watched his figure they could see his back muscles twitching and the sweat was beginning to stick his shirt to his back all his starkly defined muscles and bones showing clearly "good lord Albus he's thin!" Said Poppy loudly Albus gave a sigh "I'm afraid he's under allot of stress. When he does turn up for a meal, witch as you've noticed isn't often, I think he throws it all back up any way" Poppy looked even more worried "what are they doing to him Albus?" Albus sighed sadly again "last time he came back from a meeting he was bleeding from the mouth and nose when I asked him what happened he waved me away and told me it was nothing I'd be willing to bet he's suffering the cruciatus curse on a far to regular basis" the whole room went quite and the small noises Snape was making could be clearly heard they were animalistic and sounded painful his body would shudder then relax then shudder again "well shall we see what young Safari makes of him?". Safari finally turned the corner and came to the door it was only opened a crack she raised her hand to knock when she heard some noise admit from the room it sounded like a animal in pain to her she barged in ready to yell at who ever was torturing the poor thing only to draw up short when she realised the noise was emitting from a very tall skinny man with jaw length black hair, high cheek bones and a well defined nose, well this man certainly didn't fit her cousins "greasy, ugly git" description at all, sure he wasn't drop dead handsome but he was attractive and she'd bet he'd be a good 6'2 or so all tall and wiry, he was very well defined and dark the type of person you never forgot, he was however, at the moment, hunched over a desk and making awful noises her hand flew to her mouth what the hell was wrong with him? She rushed over to him gently touching his back she could feel the wiry muscles jerking under her hand 'be careful the first thing a injured animal will do is strike out even if they don't mean it' her mothers words rung in her ears she gingerly rubbed his back he seemed to relax slightly she grabbed her wand and muttered "accio chair" the chair across the room flew to her and she sat next to him pulling him to her so his head moved from his desk to just above her breast nothing like human heart beat to calm someone down as he genteelly settled and calmed seemingly completely she searched for any signs as to where he slept a well place levitation charm and she'd have him tucked in 'I'm really a motherly type aren't I' she thought wryly, she sighed and grabbed her wand again "revealo" she said the bright yellow light swept the room and run idly over the walls before coming to rest on one particular book on the book shelf over the far wall. Safari quickly checked for wards or alarms and found none she pulled the book and the book case swung forward to reveal a hall she levitated him carefully down the hall into a dullish room with a large bed in the middle covered in grey blankets she pulled back the surprisingly soft blankets and lied him down she reached up and undid a few of the high collared shirts buttons and pulled the blankets over him she sat to watch awhile in case his dreams came back she sat on the edge of the bed, he convulsed suddenly and she started rubbing his arms he seemed to relax but he reached over and pulled her to him she gave a startled squeak and landed next to him he murmured something and pulled her up to his chest she could hear the rumble of his heart and feel his muscles 'score one, he really does have good muscles' , she'd stay there for a few minutes till he settled and leave but either she was very tired or his heart beat lulled her, she somehow fell asleep. Back in the staff room everyone was slightly surprised "well I believe this is the start of a reluctant and overzealous friendship" Albus commented "how do you arrive at that?" Asked Minerva "oh it's rather simple he'll be highly reluctant and she'll try and mother him as best she can" the staff shared sceptical glances. Severus Snape woke up with something warm and heavy on his chest. 'Wait a minute!' His mind yelled he slowly opened one eye sneer firmly in place it flittered right of his face when he caught sight of a flash of red hair "Lily?" The girl stirred turning her head slightly letting him catch her profile she had dark auburn eyebrows darker then her hair, a pretty feminie nose, a fullish mouth, large eyes and long eyelashes, high cheekbones, from where he was she had a slight cleft in her chin and a creamy complexion, no freckles not like most redheads but the biggest question of all was, what on gods earth was she doing here! Safari woke to being gently shaken by two strong hands "wha..." she looked up in to the eyes of Severus Snape they were just like the rest of him dark, alluring and unforgettable, her mouth formed a surprised 'o' as she stared straight back. He looked at her surprised eyes and felt very naked "look you silly girl what are you doing here? Wait I don't really care, just get out!" she stared back with her navy velvet eyes and said right back "aren't you going to offer me some coffee? No? My names Safari" she stuck her hand out and Severus grabbed it irritability "all well and good I'm Severus. Would you go now I don't have time for this" she watched him and he wanted to run away she looked at him like Albus all sad and sorry "I won't go unless you come to breakfast" he gave her a death glare, he'd had enough "OUT! NOW! GO!" she swung off the bed "bye" she smiled "OUT!" she broke into a run and Severus threw himself moodily back on the bed 'I really don't need this' he thought sourly, Severus was the first to admit his nerves were frayed beyond all belief and what was worst the children were coming back in three weeks, he knew exactly where he was heading, he'd seen so many before him do the same, there was a mental break down with his name on it any day now and what's more he just wished that Voldemont would stop using him as entertainment and finish him off already, his dark mark ached constantly and the dark lord was using the cructis curse more often and for longer, last time he had been summoned the dark lord had given him one of his own potions one that caused the spell that was cast(in this case the cractius) to stay in the system and randomly repeat there wasn't an antidote yet he doubted with the cructius, however mild it was, plaguing his system and randomly causing his muscles to spasm in unbelievable pain, that he would be making one soon. He sighed sadly and reached for his bed side table pulling out a bag of white powder and a needle muggles only had one thing that was better than potions and this was it, heroine they called it, he didn't take it very often maybe once or twice a week, the last thing he needed was an addiction he'd taken a potion to stop the physical addiction but the way it made his mind feel free he didn't doubt for a moment that he could become reliant. As the wonderful white liquid pulsed though his system his mind went free and he felt the now familiar feeling of flying come and grasp him he gave a gasp of pleasure and surprise it still never failed no matter how many times he'd taken it to make him feel surprised, he didn't know how long he lay there the rest of the world forgotten before it finally started to wear off and still somewhat wrapped in the glow he packed away the evidence of his escape and walked to the great hall. He entered still coming down slowly and sat tiredly next to the head master "morning Severus" Albus announced cheerfully "morning" Severus was still drifting slightly when he felt the start of an attack coming he knew he wouldn't make the door in time so he threw himself to the floor laying on his back awaiting the first real convulsion "what on earth..." Poppy's words died in her throat as Severus's nerve endings blistered he felt some one trying to cast a healing spell before he heard Poppy's worried voice say "get his shirt off, it's restricting his breathing" he tried to turn away to stop them from seeing his track marks from the needles but some one was straddling his lower stomach and before he could get away his shirt come off, the tremors slowly started to fade he was still shaking and he could feel the sweat sticking his hair to his face, he tried to sit but the person siting on him was still there he groaned as his muscles screamed in protest, his eyes came into focus and he saw all the staffs worried faces hovering above him and a very angry looking Safari sitting astride him he groaned again "let me up women" he growled her thigh muscles just clamped around him tighter "no. What have you been shooting up? Don't look at me like that I worked in a hospital I know you've been taking some thing so just tell me" he desperately tried to get away but more restraining hands were placed on his arms "let me up" he twisted and the hand of panic finally took over he struggled with all he had oblivious to the protesting muscles he pushed and plunged and finally got free, Safari tumbling onto the floor, trying to jump to his feet but Hagrid chose this moment to step in and easily pushed Severus back down, holding his shoulders Safari climbed on him once more "keep still your making it worse" he stopped struggling and willed himself to black out but as usual his body wouldn't obey "I'll say it again what. Have .You. Been. Taking?" he looked into her eyes silently begging her to free him but she stayed put he sighed in defeat "heroine, not much just once or twice a week. If I don't take it I sometimes cut myself. So now you all feel suitably sorry for me, can I go?" he looked madly from face to concerned face feeling very claustrophobic "that's not all though is it?" she looked at him sadly "no" he said sourly "it isn't. What do you want a life history" she sighed settling her full weight on him "no just how you got these scars" as she talked she pulled up his arm and traced the scars on his inner wrist, he shuddered he remembered how he got them all right "I tried to kill myself. Happy?" she sighed and rolled off him "I think it's safe to say your extremely mentally unstable. I think you should be supervised at all times, I have nursing experience but maybe Poppy would be better suited?" Severus was reeling he didn't even try to get up "what? There's no way I'll let any of you invade my space like that!" Safari gave him hard look "shut up and act your age! I'll do whatever the fuck I want!" he promptly shut his mouth turning his fate to the hopefully kind Albus, he was wrong "Safari I think your best suited Poppy is much to busy to supervise him" Safari gave Albus a kind look "am I not here? Do I have a say?" Safari turned on him so fast it made his head spin "no you don't have a say! Now get moving we're going to get rid of any heroine you have left and organise a routine" Severus snorted "a routine? Ha you must be joking I'm on call from booth sides" Safari grabbed his bare arm and jerked him off the floor and started towards the door he opened his mouth to protest she cut him off "if you say anything I'll stun you so fast you won't know what hit you" he meekly followed her out the door like a particularly sad dog.
Safari smiled to herself as she read the letter again, Dear Safari, We request your presence as soon as possible at Hogwarts school of witch craft and wizardry as your excellent reputation as both teacher and defence against the dark arts professor proceeds you, you have been recommended for the defence against dark arts position here by one of my most reliable friends in your field, Remus Lupin, we eagerly await your reply, Albus Dumbledore Safari had replied almost the same day it had come, she couldn't believe she had got the job! She was only 19 and hadn't even attend Hogwarts she'd been home schooled she couldn't believe her luck at being asked to teach at the best school (in her opinion) in the world. She fiddled nervously with her dark auburn hair as the carriage she was in swayed along towards Hogwarts her hair fell in her face again and she wondered why she kept it so long she sighed and looked out the window again and caught sight of the castle and gasped 'wow!' she thought 'it's, well, wow' she thought again as the carriage got closer the castle almost seemed to loom up from the ground stretching to meet the sky 'great I'm going to get lost or fired for sure' looking over the huge castle she could only imagine the amount of rooms and stairs and well whatever else you found in huge, imposing castles to get lost in. The carriage stopped and she clambered out her jeans snagging on the step of the carriage "oh, bugger!" She swore reaching down to un-in tangle herself "oh, hello there" a kind voice reached her ears "I can only assume your Miss Hawthorn, I mean" the voice continued "how many Australian accented red heads do you see in one day?" Safari looked up there was a kind looking long white bearded man standing on the front steps of the castle smiling down at her, he was the kind of person you just wanted to trust right away so, automatically Safari became suspicious of him "g'day you must be headmaster Dumbledore" as she addressed him her gaze found his eyes and her suspicions went right out the window along with her voice, 'what amazing eyes' she didn't know how long they both looked at one and other but finally he seemed satisfied with what he saw "quite correct my dear" he said in that wonderful voice "would you care to meet the rest of the staff?" She smiled at him smoothing her white polo neck down and checking her loose fitting dark blue jeans "sure I'd love to but what about my...." As she turned to view her luggage it was gone "err never mind hey?" She smiled at him again and he returned it full force "now my dear follow me, I'll give you a run down as we walk" she followed his long strides effortlessly 'ah the pleasures of being 5'8' and he began talking again "now you'll get along well with every one I trust but I'm warning you now Severus Snape, the potions teacher and master doesn't like or get along with anyone so your foolish to try and make 'friends' with him, unless of course your up to a challenge or incredibly stupid" She pulled a small face "surely he can't be that bad?" Dumbledore looked at her again "oh he is. But maybe you'll try a bit harder then usual to get to know him?" She considered this a second "well I always have been one for complex people, I'm often told I'm complicated so we might just get along" his lips twitched "who am I to say?" she got the distinct impression he knew some thing she didn't. The door of the staff room swung open before Safari and she stepped in and reviewed the faces before her, she could tell Severus wasn't among them, after all her cousin had given her a detailed description of him, one was a tall severe looking women who immediately smiled ruining her severe face and looking more like a mother than anything else "hello there child it's a pleasure to meet you" said the women "likewise." The rest of the staff smiled introduced themselves and laughed at her jokes and began discussing the missing potions master "where could he be?" The tiny professor Flickwit queried Minerva replied "no doubt he's sulking about something" Dumbledore looked amused "I can quite assure you that he is neither sulking or avoiding Miss Hawthorn he's just being insufferable as always" no one looked more happy at this revolution by the headmaster so Safari decided to do her usual meet and greet quiz witch consisted of a list of questions that they could answer randomly or pass she explained this quietly before starting "does anyone here have a pet?" A few professors waved their hands and she continued "has anyone here ever been arrested?" No one put his or her hand in the air "no? Okay then has anyone here got a tattoo?" Again no one waved their hand she continued for a while before becoming bored after asking for the way to her rooms she suggested they retire "professor Dumbledore may I have the instructions on how to get to Snape's quarters?" It seemed the whole room paused and stilled waiting for the answer "of course" Dumbledore started scratching down some directions on some paper "may I be so bold as to ask why?" Safari wouldn't let them know but it stung just a bit that he hadn't turned up to meet her "well he can try to avoid me but I will purposely seek him out the more he does so. So I'm going to pay him a 'hi it's nice to meet you too' visit" everyone seemed to smile at this explanation "well lets hope you are still mentally intact by morning shall we?" Safari laughed "I shall hope so. Hey you never know we might even be on first name basis by morning" Minerva snickered "I doubt that mans on a first name basis with his mother" Safari bit back a laugh "well I'm going to physically tie myself to a chair and refuse to leave until he tells me all about himself. Or maybe I should tie HIM to the chair" she mused Dumbledore chuckled "have fun Miss Hawthorn" Safari opened the door "oh I will, call me Safari" she waved and started trying to navigate off Dumbledore's map. Dumbledore turned back to the staff who looked expectantly back "shall we see what happens then?" Queried Dumbledore "yes!" The room erupted at once they pulled what seemed to be the glass top of a coffee table out from under one of the lounges and Dumbledore announced in a clear voice "Severus Snape" the surface of the glass glimmered then turned opaque showing a ragged looking Severus Snape in a white button down shirt and plain loose black pants minus his heavy cloak and shoes head resting on his arms hunched over his desk asleep his legs were stuck out from under his desk and the nape of his neck was clearly exposed "well he almost looks relaxed when he's asleep doesn't he?" Minerva said receiving several nods as they watched his figure they could see his back muscles twitching and the sweat was beginning to stick his shirt to his back all his starkly defined muscles and bones showing clearly "good lord Albus he's thin!" Said Poppy loudly Albus gave a sigh "I'm afraid he's under allot of stress. When he does turn up for a meal, witch as you've noticed isn't often, I think he throws it all back up any way" Poppy looked even more worried "what are they doing to him Albus?" Albus sighed sadly again "last time he came back from a meeting he was bleeding from the mouth and nose when I asked him what happened he waved me away and told me it was nothing I'd be willing to bet he's suffering the cruciatus curse on a far to regular basis" the whole room went quite and the small noises Snape was making could be clearly heard they were animalistic and sounded painful his body would shudder then relax then shudder again "well shall we see what young Safari makes of him?". Safari finally turned the corner and came to the door it was only opened a crack she raised her hand to knock when she heard some noise admit from the room it sounded like a animal in pain to her she barged in ready to yell at who ever was torturing the poor thing only to draw up short when she realised the noise was emitting from a very tall skinny man with jaw length black hair, high cheek bones and a well defined nose, well this man certainly didn't fit her cousins "greasy, ugly git" description at all, sure he wasn't drop dead handsome but he was attractive and she'd bet he'd be a good 6'2 or so all tall and wiry, he was very well defined and dark the type of person you never forgot, he was however, at the moment, hunched over a desk and making awful noises her hand flew to her mouth what the hell was wrong with him? She rushed over to him gently touching his back she could feel the wiry muscles jerking under her hand 'be careful the first thing a injured animal will do is strike out even if they don't mean it' her mothers words rung in her ears she gingerly rubbed his back he seemed to relax slightly she grabbed her wand and muttered "accio chair" the chair across the room flew to her and she sat next to him pulling him to her so his head moved from his desk to just above her breast nothing like human heart beat to calm someone down as he genteelly settled and calmed seemingly completely she searched for any signs as to where he slept a well place levitation charm and she'd have him tucked in 'I'm really a motherly type aren't I' she thought wryly, she sighed and grabbed her wand again "revealo" she said the bright yellow light swept the room and run idly over the walls before coming to rest on one particular book on the book shelf over the far wall. Safari quickly checked for wards or alarms and found none she pulled the book and the book case swung forward to reveal a hall she levitated him carefully down the hall into a dullish room with a large bed in the middle covered in grey blankets she pulled back the surprisingly soft blankets and lied him down she reached up and undid a few of the high collared shirts buttons and pulled the blankets over him she sat to watch awhile in case his dreams came back she sat on the edge of the bed, he convulsed suddenly and she started rubbing his arms he seemed to relax but he reached over and pulled her to him she gave a startled squeak and landed next to him he murmured something and pulled her up to his chest she could hear the rumble of his heart and feel his muscles 'score one, he really does have good muscles' , she'd stay there for a few minutes till he settled and leave but either she was very tired or his heart beat lulled her, she somehow fell asleep. Back in the staff room everyone was slightly surprised "well I believe this is the start of a reluctant and overzealous friendship" Albus commented "how do you arrive at that?" Asked Minerva "oh it's rather simple he'll be highly reluctant and she'll try and mother him as best she can" the staff shared sceptical glances. Severus Snape woke up with something warm and heavy on his chest. 'Wait a minute!' His mind yelled he slowly opened one eye sneer firmly in place it flittered right of his face when he caught sight of a flash of red hair "Lily?" The girl stirred turning her head slightly letting him catch her profile she had dark auburn eyebrows darker then her hair, a pretty feminie nose, a fullish mouth, large eyes and long eyelashes, high cheekbones, from where he was she had a slight cleft in her chin and a creamy complexion, no freckles not like most redheads but the biggest question of all was, what on gods earth was she doing here! Safari woke to being gently shaken by two strong hands "wha..." she looked up in to the eyes of Severus Snape they were just like the rest of him dark, alluring and unforgettable, her mouth formed a surprised 'o' as she stared straight back. He looked at her surprised eyes and felt very naked "look you silly girl what are you doing here? Wait I don't really care, just get out!" she stared back with her navy velvet eyes and said right back "aren't you going to offer me some coffee? No? My names Safari" she stuck her hand out and Severus grabbed it irritability "all well and good I'm Severus. Would you go now I don't have time for this" she watched him and he wanted to run away she looked at him like Albus all sad and sorry "I won't go unless you come to breakfast" he gave her a death glare, he'd had enough "OUT! NOW! GO!" she swung off the bed "bye" she smiled "OUT!" she broke into a run and Severus threw himself moodily back on the bed 'I really don't need this' he thought sourly, Severus was the first to admit his nerves were frayed beyond all belief and what was worst the children were coming back in three weeks, he knew exactly where he was heading, he'd seen so many before him do the same, there was a mental break down with his name on it any day now and what's more he just wished that Voldemont would stop using him as entertainment and finish him off already, his dark mark ached constantly and the dark lord was using the cructis curse more often and for longer, last time he had been summoned the dark lord had given him one of his own potions one that caused the spell that was cast(in this case the cractius) to stay in the system and randomly repeat there wasn't an antidote yet he doubted with the cructius, however mild it was, plaguing his system and randomly causing his muscles to spasm in unbelievable pain, that he would be making one soon. He sighed sadly and reached for his bed side table pulling out a bag of white powder and a needle muggles only had one thing that was better than potions and this was it, heroine they called it, he didn't take it very often maybe once or twice a week, the last thing he needed was an addiction he'd taken a potion to stop the physical addiction but the way it made his mind feel free he didn't doubt for a moment that he could become reliant. As the wonderful white liquid pulsed though his system his mind went free and he felt the now familiar feeling of flying come and grasp him he gave a gasp of pleasure and surprise it still never failed no matter how many times he'd taken it to make him feel surprised, he didn't know how long he lay there the rest of the world forgotten before it finally started to wear off and still somewhat wrapped in the glow he packed away the evidence of his escape and walked to the great hall. He entered still coming down slowly and sat tiredly next to the head master "morning Severus" Albus announced cheerfully "morning" Severus was still drifting slightly when he felt the start of an attack coming he knew he wouldn't make the door in time so he threw himself to the floor laying on his back awaiting the first real convulsion "what on earth..." Poppy's words died in her throat as Severus's nerve endings blistered he felt some one trying to cast a healing spell before he heard Poppy's worried voice say "get his shirt off, it's restricting his breathing" he tried to turn away to stop them from seeing his track marks from the needles but some one was straddling his lower stomach and before he could get away his shirt come off, the tremors slowly started to fade he was still shaking and he could feel the sweat sticking his hair to his face, he tried to sit but the person siting on him was still there he groaned as his muscles screamed in protest, his eyes came into focus and he saw all the staffs worried faces hovering above him and a very angry looking Safari sitting astride him he groaned again "let me up women" he growled her thigh muscles just clamped around him tighter "no. What have you been shooting up? Don't look at me like that I worked in a hospital I know you've been taking some thing so just tell me" he desperately tried to get away but more restraining hands were placed on his arms "let me up" he twisted and the hand of panic finally took over he struggled with all he had oblivious to the protesting muscles he pushed and plunged and finally got free, Safari tumbling onto the floor, trying to jump to his feet but Hagrid chose this moment to step in and easily pushed Severus back down, holding his shoulders Safari climbed on him once more "keep still your making it worse" he stopped struggling and willed himself to black out but as usual his body wouldn't obey "I'll say it again what. Have .You. Been. Taking?" he looked into her eyes silently begging her to free him but she stayed put he sighed in defeat "heroine, not much just once or twice a week. If I don't take it I sometimes cut myself. So now you all feel suitably sorry for me, can I go?" he looked madly from face to concerned face feeling very claustrophobic "that's not all though is it?" she looked at him sadly "no" he said sourly "it isn't. What do you want a life history" she sighed settling her full weight on him "no just how you got these scars" as she talked she pulled up his arm and traced the scars on his inner wrist, he shuddered he remembered how he got them all right "I tried to kill myself. Happy?" she sighed and rolled off him "I think it's safe to say your extremely mentally unstable. I think you should be supervised at all times, I have nursing experience but maybe Poppy would be better suited?" Severus was reeling he didn't even try to get up "what? There's no way I'll let any of you invade my space like that!" Safari gave him hard look "shut up and act your age! I'll do whatever the fuck I want!" he promptly shut his mouth turning his fate to the hopefully kind Albus, he was wrong "Safari I think your best suited Poppy is much to busy to supervise him" Safari gave Albus a kind look "am I not here? Do I have a say?" Safari turned on him so fast it made his head spin "no you don't have a say! Now get moving we're going to get rid of any heroine you have left and organise a routine" Severus snorted "a routine? Ha you must be joking I'm on call from booth sides" Safari grabbed his bare arm and jerked him off the floor and started towards the door he opened his mouth to protest she cut him off "if you say anything I'll stun you so fast you won't know what hit you" he meekly followed her out the door like a particularly sad dog.