Shots between the St. Berry scenes shown in the Prom episode.
Disclaimer: Own nothing but a serious love for St Berry and Jon Groff.
Title comes from the song " I Dreamed A Dance" from the Broadway Musical Next To Normal
Rachel stared into the mirror grinning brightly. Pushing away the feeling that she needed anyone for tonight. Least of all Finn. He wasn't there for her when she needed him, was he? If he could forgive a cheater and all that baby drama, Rachel was certainly allowed to forgive a few scrambled eggs.
The door bell rung and she adjusted her pony tail quickly, wondering why she was filled with strange butterflies. She pushed the thoughts of actually enjoying the evening out of her mind. But it was her prom, after all. She would have fun, she would have a blast. Broken hearts and shattered egg shells and glee drama wouldn't matter- not today.
"Coming" she hollered down from her room. She was ready, but she wanted that entrance. The moment where she would walk down the stairs and all eyes would be on her. His face would light up and the moment would be perfect. Couldn't she have just that after all the trouble she had gone through in the last two years? Even if it was with Jesse?
She heard the front door click open and mumbled voices of her fathers exchanging words with Jesse. She opened her door to hear them talking about his studies.
"OK, READY" she shouted. She deserved her star entrance after all. This was her moment, wasn't every girl supposed to have this perfect moment? They needed to be silent, for her.
She glided down the stairs in the perfect dress, walking elegantly in her heels, stopping on the last step in front of her audience. Jesse's mouth gaped open, his breathing stopped.
"Wow" he breathed out, blinking at her as if she was a vision that would disappear in any moment. He took a breath in and smiled. He knew he didn't deserve this and they were no where close to being back where they had been. No I love yous or kisses to share, but still in that moment, Jesse could swear his heart sped up and he couldn't think about anything but winning her back. He wanted to be the guy that deserved her, wanted to make her smile and feel safe. He had to be that guy for her.
He started in a soft voice, a slow, romantic tempo. The song in his head the minute he saw her. He was surprised he could even breathe, let along sing in this moment.
I've just seen a face,
I can't forget the time or place
That we'd just met, she's just the girl for me
And I want all the world to see we've met
Na na na na na na
Had it been another day
I might have looked the other way
But I had never been aware
And as it is I'll dream of her tonight
Na na na na na na
Falling, yes I am falling
And she keeps calling me back again
I have never known
The likes of this, I've been alone
And I have missed things and kept out of sight
But other girls were never quite like this
Na na na na na na
Falling, yes I am falling
And she keeps calling me back again
He finished with a weak smile, extending the small gift to her. As If it could start to make up for the things he had done. She smiled back to him, trying to keep down the tears.
"You look absolutely stunning" Jesse choked out.
Rachel nodded with a small smile before taking the gift and opening it. It was a simple corsage, a yellow ribbon with a pink flower and she let him tie in on her. She gazed into his eyes, catching her breath for a second. She leaned in, almost as if she wanted to kiss him, as if nothing mattered but the perfect harmony of their voices and how perfect they could be to each other. He blinked back shock and breathed in heavily, inching closer to her, leaning his head towards her. Not for once believing that she could forgive him enough to kiss him in this moment. Perhaps it was the romance in the air or the idea of prom, but whatever it was, he couldn't stop his racing heart. His hands still held one of hers, after having tied the corsage. His eyes were fluttering close, his heart racing, he was sure she could hear it.
An explosion of sound erupted, ruining the moment. Rachel retreated, and suddenly she was gone. He blinked his eyes open, confused. Registering the noise as her ring tone. Which she had run upstairs to get. She came down the stairs seconds later, on the phone.
"Yes, no, we're heading out now" she was saying, glancing to Jesse for an instant before walking past him. He followed silently, waving bye to her parents before shutting the door behind him.
When she was off the phone, she became silent. She glanced over at him occasionally, as if in disbelief that she had almost kissed him. She told herself it was the allure of the moment. She promised herself that it did nothing to her heart. Deep down, she knew that was a lie.
His heart couldn't help but break as she sang on that stage. The whole night a fantastic blur of color and lights and laughter. He was where he needed to be. She was his home. She was the thing that kept him grounded and decent. But he knew she didn't need him as much as he needed her. He couldn't help but follow her gaze to Finn during the song. Though the words didn't match, she seemed to be singing to Finn. He wished for an instant he could take back everything or move past the wanting and winning her back. He needed to hold her in his arms and whisper sweet words in her ear. He needed her back.
"How was it?" she asked, fishing for a compliment with a smile, coming towards her. He laughed lightly in response, taking her hand in his, wondering if she would resist. She seemed fine with it, but a part of him thought it was for Finn. Perhaps he was a pawn to make Finn jealous. Even that didn't bother him. As long as he got one moment, one night with her, everything would be alright again. He could find himself again. He could stop being scared, lost, terrified of the future and of his stupidity. It wouldn't matter that he had the voice of an angel or a horrible GPA, or even that he had a scarf he had bought at a flea market in an attempt to be more trendy. All that mattered was her. He had to make her happy, even if just for a moment.
"You were perfect" he whispered in her ear, pulling her closer, his fingers tracing up her forearms to pull her into a dance. "Would you dance with me?" he murmured, as if he needed reassurance that this was actually happening.
If one thing could make Jesse St James lose his natural confidence, his ability to face anything, it was Rachel Berry.
"We are dancing" she muttered with a laugh.
He was whispering jokes in her ear, telling her anecdotes, mostly of his failure and she was laughing. She was lighting up and smiling at him and looking at him as if he was the world. He wanted to whisper something that would make up it all. For her to understand how much he had missed her. How much he had really wanted her. To explain everything. The words were on his tongue.
If there was one time to say I love you- wasn't it prom?
He leaned in close, placing a soft kiss on her neck.
"Rachel, I lo-" he leaned to her ear, hearing the words, they throbbed in his head. He had to say it, he was ready to say it. It was what he always knew and somehow he knew that she would see he meant it. She would be able to read him. Not an act, not Jesse St James, just really see him for who he was.
Suddenly Finn was in his face, shoving him. Perhaps Jesse was shoving him back because he lost the moment. Maybe because he wanted to prove he deserved her. She didn't deserve this moment. This horrible massacre at her prom. She deserved romance and someone who wouldn't make a scene unless it was a dramatic melody sung at an ear splitting volume that encapsulated a confession of love. Not a brutal scene that surely would ruin everything. He hated Finn for that. He hated Finn for somehow being the one to protect her. He fought against Finn for his own hate at himself, for having left her like he did. For being so full of himself and his fucking talent that he had given up on love and run. Sure, he had told her it was for the 4th national win. But he had been afraid of loving her so much. That had made him run. He had broken his own heart so she wouldn't. Then when she had haunted him in the last year, he knew he had to come back. No trying on LA or auditioning for the Hollywood Bowl or studying, all he needed was her. Fame and glory would have to come after love this time.