Title: Beautiful
Fandom: Bionicle
Genre: Angst
Rating: T
Summary: "You were always beautiful. Always." WARNING. Contains mentions of an eating disorder. Inspired by Saya Moonshadow's 'Tahu's Concrete Angel'.
A/N: Not necessarily Bionicle centric, but does feature a prominent character from Bionicle. Please review and/or favourite.
Clean it all, it must be cleaned.
She's bent over the porcelain toilet, finger down her throat as she attempts to activate her gag reflex, so she can hurl the remnants of her dinner down the toilet.
'So I can't get fat.' She reasons. 'So I can be beautiful.'
She can feel his magenta eyes on her as he watches her back.
He's beyond protesting now.
He's given up.
But that doesn't mean he won't judge her.
The first time she had done it, he had told her everything and anything in a desperate attempt to make her stop. He had even shouted at her. He NEVER shouted at her before that.
Her body finally gives in and the waste hits the water, purging her stomach of its contents. She gasps for breath and can feel him wince behind her, but he doesn't even dare touch her and it makes her heart sink all that much lower.
Clean it all, it must be cleaned.
As she washes her hands under the sink, rubbing soap into the calluses beginning to form on her knuckles, he finally speaks.
"Why do you do this to yourself?"
She finally looks over her shoulder at him. "What?" She questions in a small voice.
He stares hard. "Why do you do this to yourself?" The tone is challenging, but not aggressive.
She pauses then looks back down at her hands, washing away the soap and the bubbles, washing away the evidence. "Don't start again."
"Start what again?" He asks all too innocently, but the magenta eyes behind the red mask are smug as fuck.
She snaps and screams at him. "You don't know what it's LIKE! You're fucking PERFECT!" He winces and the anger inside of her purrs at the sight. "PERFECT no matter what you do!" She snarls.
She's struggling to breathe, her eyes are stinging with tears and she's wishing she'd worn waterproof mascara today but she goes on. "You don't know what it's like!" Her hands are shaking and there's a lump in her throat. "I just want to be beautiful."
". . ."
" . . ."
The silence that follows is maddening, nothing but the sound of running water from the tap. Her eyes sting from tears and mascara but she doesn't look away from his magenta eyes as they look at her, confusion and hurt hidden behind that ruby mask.
His voice is barely above a whisper when he finally speaks and she just catches the words.
"You were always beautiful. Always."
But then she blinks and he's gone, nothing but a figment from a broken mind and a lonely heart.
She turns back to the sink and turns it off, pausing to catch herself from collapsing before she reaches up for a facial wipe and whispers the words of a forgotten enemy.
"Clean it all, it must be cleaned."