Title: One Bullet

Author: lildreamer

Rating: T, just to be safe. This fic's pretty dark.

Pairings: None.

Spoilers: Rampage, One of Our Own, and S4 premiere

Summary: He's seen too much death. Lost too many he cared for. And it's more than he can bear.

Disclaimer: I don't own CSI: Miami or any of its characters.

A/N: This fic's filled with angst. Don't like? Don't read.

All right, on with the story…
One bullet.

That was all it would take.

That was all he needed.

That was all he had left…

He'd lost everything else. He'd seen too much death. Lost too many he cared for. And it was more than he could bear. The dark, metallic object stared back at him from the table. Beckoning him. Tempting him. He ran his hands over his face.

He'd finally come to the end of his rope. Like a watch that had been wound too tightly, he broke. In one year, he'd lost everything he ever cared about. He'd lost his wife to the malice of a bunch of gangsters. And those same gangsters took his brother from him soon after. He had nothing left to live for.

"I'll keep taking everything you love!"

He reached for the small object on the table, wrapping trembling fingers around the cool metal. He picked it up and shook the chamber open. Six slots, one bullet. He took a deep, quavering breath and spun the chamber. He quickly slammed it back in before it could stop spinning. He pressed the cool metal to his chest as a single tear escaped from his eye.

The haunting images returned. Images he could not erase from his mind. Memories. There she was, lying in that hospital bed. Underneath the bandages, stitches, and tubes was the beautiful woman he'd fallen in love with. He wanted to tell her that everything would be all right, that she'd get better. But he couldn't speak. Nothing he felt could be put into words. As he watched her fight for her life, he found himself wishing that he could make it all go away. All the hurt. And the pain. Everything. He wanted to give her the world, but he could only hold her hand.

"You aren't planning to stand me up, are you…"

He closed his eyes, swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat. He clutched the small object tighter. His life was a mess. And it couldn't be fixed.

He let out a shaky breath and opened his eyes wearily, beholding invisible horrors. His brother lay there. Beaten beyond recognition. He knelt by his side and supported his brother's silent head in his lap. The older glanced briefly at the younger, gently smiling his last goodbye. Then his eyes fluttered, as he was gone.

A tear fell quietly from the younger brother's eyes.

"I love you…"

The tears continued to come as he sat there, a broken man. Tears of sorrow, guilt, and regret. He would have to live with this horrible past until the day he died.

He thrust the end of the object hard against his chest as he heard it cock.

One single thought crossed his mind, sealing his resolve. "No matter what I do, no matter hard I try…the ones I love will always be the ones who pay."

His hands shook as he tried to keep the object steady, his finger hovering over the trigger. He bit his lip and squeezed his eyes shut, preparing himself for what he was about to do.

He didn't know what else to do anymore. He was lost. His last shred of hope died with his brother.

He squeezed the small object tighter, his finger inching closer and closer to ending it all. The sorrow. The heartache. All of it. It would all be gone with a pull of the—

"NO!"

He felt a hand on top of his and jerked his head up. His haunted, pale blue eyes met with soft ones that were filled with concern.

"Ca—Calleigh?"

She'd gone to his place to update him on their most recent case and was greeted by a horrifying sight. Her best friend was holding a gun to his chest, ready to take his own life.

"Horatio, please…give me the gun," the blonde CSI pleaded, her hand moving to the gun.

"I don't…I—I can't."

"Yes, you can. Don't do this."

"It's the only way! I—I couldn't save them…I lost everything!"

"No, you haven't." Calleigh's eyes glistened with tears. "Please, Horatio. I don't want to lose you. I don't want you to die…"

Horatio looked up into his friend's eyes and saw nothing but love and understanding. His grip loosened and Calleigh slid the gun from his hands. She expertly uncocked it and set it back down on the table. She then turned to her broken friend and gathered him into her arms. The man who'd been so strong these past few years with all he'd been through was falling apart before her eyes.

"You're not alone," she whispered in his ear as tears began to stream down her own face. "You were never alone."

With those words, Horatio finally realized that even in his despair, his friends had been with him all along. He hadn't lost everything. He still had his team, his friends. He didn't have to go through this alone. The realization of what he had almost done suddenly hit him, hard. And he broke down in his best friend's arms.

"I'm sorry…I'm so sorry…"

They held each other, tears falling freely. Finding the comfort they both desperately needed in each other.

Sad, huh? But it does have a happy ending, sort of. Anyway, I was inspired to write this because a friend recently lost a loved one to suicide.

This fic is dedicated to them.

Reveiws welcome!