A/N: Inspired by the DS KH game and bit from BBS, from the interaction between Axel and Saix, Lea and Isa, and Secret Reports by Axel and Saix. For me, it turned Saix who I thought was just a right hand man to a plotter and someone who actually, I believe, treasures memories. It also turned Axel, who I thought was just missing Roxas, to someone who was actually redeeming himself (more than I thought) for how badly he treated Roxas, and ultimately Saix. Something like that.

Spoilers: If you didn't know that Axel and Saix were once friends, or you don't know that when they joined the Organization that they had a plan of their own, then I guess you may need to reconsider reading this story. Especially since I just told you all of this if you read the above…

There will be spoilers involving Xion, especially as the story gets rolling. Hints of BbS you would only pick it up if you already know it.

Relationships: For the relationship shared between Saix and Axel as well as Lea and Isa, I'm not sure how it will be written for future chapters but the current plan is it will be a friendship that could go further. That's mostly up to how the reader wants to interpret it anyways.

Roxas and Axel: A friend based one. Nothing more. Especially after 358/2. Doesn't mean that Saix might get jealous or assume otherwise. We'll see.

Disclaimer: Characters aren't mine.

This chapter is told from Saix's perspective.

When You Are Empty, There Is Only…

-

Memories

OoooooO

They had arrived here a few days ago, though Saix couldn't remember what the day was like when they arrived. It just felt like one day he woke up in a castle that was so open and hollow, seemly endless with rooms and hallways, instead of a world with life. Everyday life of going to school or work, coming home at the end of the day to enjoy supper and then moving off to bed, only to repeat the previous days events. With maybe even the slightest changes.

There was a transitional phase, as Saix called it, of darkness. Where they had found each other, not remembering or knowing why they were in darkness. Xemnas, the leader of the Organization, found them shortly after. He informed them that they were 'born' without a heart, resulting in a hollow shell-a Nobody-with fragments of your previous life. Becoming a Nobody meant the first little while things-your mental state Saix believed- would get difficult, switching from relying on the heart to learning how to act on memories alone, as Xemnas told them both.

If he was accurate, today would be the fourth day being here. Saix couldn't imagine why he was counting. Xemnas had said that they both could be in this state forever, of balancing on the tightrope of existence above a chasm of nothingness until they fall and truly cease to exist. Unless they were of course, able to cross the tightrope and become complete once more.

Saix closed his eyes against the undecorated white pillow as he lay down on the equally painfully white bed. He knew this wasn't his room. Not this pillow, not this bed. He knew before be stepped in the room, kicked off his boots, and then collapsed on his bed.

"…As for my offer, would you become my Second…?" There was a smirk drawn on Xemnas' face. Saix could feel an almost dull cunningness coming from him. As if he was only acting to be cunning. "I do not expect an answer immediately but I think it would be in your best…interest if you could call it, to accept. You would not have to go on the pawn like missions like the one you were sent out to today. Instead you would be the one to send them out. Traveling along the Corridors of Darkness seems to have left you quite exhausted."

Saix felt it was rather sudden move for Xemnas. He had anticipated the offer but wondered why it was so soon. The meeting Xemnas along with Saix's mission of recruiting for more beings 'lost in darkness' had left him surprisingly strained and tired. Saix looked out the window, which should have been beside the bed but by the desk instead, and found the everlasting night view so very different from before.

Saix knew that at night the sky could feel alive. This view lacked life. But back where they were…

Today was another day after school which Isa would return home. Isa he would always return home to his own home first in case his parents were in a good mood. Today, unfortunately for Isa, was another day which his mother had stayed home 'calling in sick' as she would tell her boss. In reality, she had been drinking and sleeping. Sometimes she would be on the couch or other times in bed. Blinds were always closed. Sunlight was 'too bright'. Bags of food and bottles were scattered across the house beginning in the kitchen and leaving a trail to either the living room or the bedroom. If it was in her room, she wouldn't usually bother to get dressed at all. His father at least went to work far more often, but the same situations would easily arise is he was feeling 'sick'.

Isa had learned painfully that when the house if dark, and the kitchen was a mess, it was time to go to his other 'home' before bringing about some crazed anger or rant from whoever was home.

"Our home is also your home," Lea's mother had told him when these situations had begun to occur. Since then, Isa had wished it really was his home. He had a key to their home in case Lea's mother was out. It would be rare when he would have to use it, since she was at home usually by the time Isa would arrive. Lea went to a different school which had a later end time that Isa's, so Isa was always the first to arrive out of the two. Isa would do his best to put on a small happy smile, to at least show his appreciation when she would greet him at the door. He figured it never really worked because he would see a hint of sadness in her green eyes framed by dark brown locks. Sometimes they would talk briefly, and if Isa hungry then she would get him just a little something so he would still be hungry enough for supper. Sometimes all he told her was he needed a little rest and then would precede straight upstairs.

Isa arrive upstairs, stumbling into Lea's room. Sunlight poured from the open window across the room, filling the room up with warmth and a soft glow. Lea's room wasn't a terrible mess, but it wasn't also the tidiest. He would have no books on the floor, but they weren't stored nicely in the bookcase nor piled neatly on the desk. His closet would have clothes 'hanging up' but sometimes a t-shirt would be hanging through a hanger rather than on it. A pair of Frisbees hung on small bedposts at the foot of the bed. At least by the window, where Lea's bed was, was always free of clutter. The large blanket that covered it had a deep ocean blue background bordered with red, orange and yellow swirling patterns which Isa and Lea had believed the design to be fiery. Lea told him that when his mother made the blanket, she had thought of the life of the sky and ocean as the sunlight would dance around on it. Neither of them understood what she meant, so they settled on fire. After all, the sun itself was a huge ball of fire, radiating heat all day. The bed, being by the window, always had sunlight on it as long as the sun was out.

Isa would drop his bag by Lea's bookcase which was by the doorway and close the door, only leaving open a small gap. He would sit on the bed and feel the warmth from the setting sun on his skin for a moment before lying down. Even as Isa would close his eyes, he would still feel heat and even see the sunlight through his closed eyes.

Here is was dark outside; always. Light only came from the castle. Typically it was quiet too. Only being here a few days Saix had found it unnaturally quiet. The Castle That Never Was…only habitants were eight Nobodies including himself. Not one of them Saix could feel any life coming from them. Not one he found he could trust.

Except maybe the one he had come here with.

Saix heard footsteps in the hallway. They stopped in front of the door. The door opened and the footsteps started a bit, and then the door closed. The steps started again, coming into the room, and then halted. Saix chose not to turn to face him as he was probably wondering why-

Usually Isa would feel Lea's presence as Lea would enter the room. Even if Isa had fallen asleep, he would feel something faint at the back of his mind, making him slightly more conscious than asleep. Isa would begin to feel the faded warmth of the sunlight was it slowly disappeared from the town. Lea would always find the need to wake Isa. Lea was never sure how badly things had gone for his friend, and so Lea would cautiously approach the bed and sit down quietly.

Then Lea would reach out his hand and put it on Isa's shoulder, giving a quick shake, "Hey, um, Isa do you-"

"-Saix? What's with you?" There is suspicion in his voice. There is no weight on the bed. Saix pushes himself up, bringing the pillow onto his lap, feeling even more worn down. "This isn't your room. I'm sure that you would have realized that, no matter how exhausted you are."

Saix turns to face the man that looks so very much like Lea. The same red hair with dark roots. The same green eyes that matched his mother's. Same strangely slender body. But upon a closer comparison with Saix's memories, he sees the man in front of him isn't Lea. The eyes aren't full of a lively spirit like a fiery bonfire. Instead they seem to hold an empty cavern with a small fire, barely burning. The black coat of the Organization gives his face a darker, hollow look that could vanish into darkness instantly, and seems to pronounce how unusually slender his body is that Saix was sure that is never was that unusual. No, the man beside the bed, crossed arms and waiting an answer is not Lea. He can't be Lea.

He is known as Axel; the hollow shell that Lea has become.

"Axel…" Saix still finds the name strange to say. He doesn't know where to begin. What does Axel remember?

Axel sits down on the bed facing Saix, "Yeah I remember, bad day right? But c'mon, you only did this when we were little kids! You would say something like, 'grow up and act like an adult'!" Axel smiled and gave Saix a little push on the shoulder. Saix shifted slightly and frowned. Axel cocked his head to the side and waited. Saix remained quiet. Axel stopped grinning. "So- are you going to tell me soon? I'm pretty tired from this long day-"

"Xemnas," Saix said quietly. Saix doesn't find himself feeling sadden that Axel didn't remember how long their 'tradition' had lasted for. Instead he feels a memory rise up- a memory of when Lea had forgotten his birthday for some silly reason- rather than an actual feeling. Perhaps he didn't remember because it had begun to happen more often as they got older. He practically moved in. Then when they moved out they-

"What did he want with you? Surely you hadn't messed up that badly already?"

"Do you remember when we first…received our names? From Xemnas?" Saix asked. Axel looked up to the ceiling, remembering. He nodded. "You also remember that you 'stepped out of line'?"

Axel flinched and looked back at Saix. He had a look of hurt on his face, "Look, this whole new naming thing may seem fine to you, but I think he's brainwashing all of us, Isa."

"That is not my name, Axel." Saix closed his eyes. "The person you knew, 'Isa', is dead." If reincarnations existed, then that is what Isa felt like to Saix. Another life. Just like Lea. We are not them.

"That's not true! Look Is-," he cut off as Saix's eyes snapped opened, pupils dilated, shoulders tensed. Axel gathered his breath then continued on, "Look. Xemnas is just trying to trick us! You must see that! I don't know what he's told you but we can't trust him," he said as he brought his fist down on the space between the two on the bed.

"I know." Saix paused. "That wasn't the focus of the meeting. As he phrased it, when you 'stepped of line' and I 'corrected' your behaviour, he thought it would be appropriate that I become his Second."

"Just from…that?" Axel's eyes widened.

Xemnas had found them lost in the Corridor of Darkness. There, he had assigned them names. Number VII, Saix. Number VIII, Axel. Isa and Lea are no longer and the memories are all that's left. "The memories will remind you what it was like to have a heart." That's what they were told.

They were brought to a room with high chairs which resembled thrones. Xemnas sat on the highest, and five chairs were filled with Nobodies cloaked in black just like them. Saix and Axel stood on the ground searching the faces of the six Nobodies, trying to find emotion that wasn't hollowed or fake. For some reason, those faces seemed familiar.

"We welcome two new members- number VII, Saix along with-"

"Hold it!" Axel shouted. Xemnas stopped and frowned. Saix noticed the others returned Axel's interruption with amusement.

One with a scar and eye patch pointed at Axel and laughed, "Look at that! This one still has some fresh memories!" The others laughed or chuckled. Except Xemnas.

"Won't last long." A younger one replied.

"If you wouldn't mind," one with longer lighter hair directed his words towards Xemnas. There was a twisted danger to his smile and excitement in his eyes, "I would be honoured if I could experiment how long it would-"

Axel shook, only making the group more amused. "That's not-!" His voice echoing around the room then drowning amongst the mocking laughs leaving a whisper, "It's-it's Isa.."

Xemnas was ticked. No doubt he hadn't expected Axel's outburst. Before wanting anything else to go terribly off course, Saix took a step forward, feeling strangely calm. Or empty.

The others stopped talking and focused on Saix. They looked expectantly at him-probably wondering what amusing event would come next.

"Is-"

"I am," Saix spoke loudly, interrupting Axel, "Number VII, Saix. The Luna Diviner. And this, Nobody, is Number VIII, Axel. The Flurry of Dancing Flames."

The others grumbled. Xemnas' frown disappeared. Saix saw a hint of approval on his face.

"But-"

Saix turned to face him, lowering his voice, "And that is final, Axel." His green eyes widened.

"He believed that I wouldn't rely on my memories. Even though you were a friend that wouldn't…hinder my judgement." Saix continued. He stared as blankly at the pillow as the pillow itself was in his hands. He knew he should have felt something for stopping Axel. Irritated, like when Lea would refuse to apologize for something that was his fault. It wasn't right. But then why should he feel anything for this man's rude behaviour? After all, Axel isn't Lea.

But that didn't seem right either.

"So what makes him think that you weren't your usual short tempered self? Like you are when you're hungry and you can smell some food but you can't have any? Remember?" Axel fell back onto the bed grinning at some memory fitting that description. He dangled his feet off the bed, knocking some dirt off his boots onto the floor and the side of the bed. Saix could remember just how short tempered he was without food. There was easily more than one situation it had happen. The cause was usually Lea's. But Axel was a different being entirely.

And so was Saix. "Xemnas was right. I didn't see you."

"You're not making any sense."

"I saw a man…no, a being standing in front of me. His misbehaviour was causing unrest in the room. I felt I had a need to settle it. Once the other Nobodies started talking, I didn't even think about who it was. And Xemnas noticed that." Axel stared back with his mouth open. Saix felt uncertain, because the next words didn't feel right in his mind, which only meant they wouldn't come out any better. "Because of that I felt, as close as I can, like I should have felt something. Not nothing. I didn't feel much of anything in that room or lately…since we came here. I suppose what I want is my heart back. So I don't feel so empty. That way I can feel again." Saix felt like he didn't say much of anything. There still wasn't something right with what he said. If Axel asked to have it repeated again, Saix didn't know if he could do any better.

"So if I can get you're heart back, that'll make you Isa again. This whole adding an 'X' thing to our names is just pointless…"

"No…they're gone. Even if we get our hearts back, we'll be Saix and Axel. The time for Isa and Lea is gone."

Axel snatched the pillow from Saix, "If you truly believe they are dead, then why the hell are you in my room? You've acting on the very memories you are trying to deny!" He sat up quickly and whacked Saix on the head, causing his blue hair to become more ruffled than usual.

Lea pulled the pillow away harshly from Isa and used both hands to hold one end of the pillow to knock Isa over onto the bed. As Isa was hit backwards he had a look of shock on his face which quickly turned into a devious grin. Using his momentum he lifted his leg and kicked Lea in the elbow, causing Lea to let go of the pillow-

Saix almost fell backwards onto the bed from being caught off guard. He wacked Axel's elbow with a fisted hand as he regained his balance, causing Axel to roll backwards and at the same time allowing the pillow to fall from Axel's grasp-

-then Isa swung forward and grabbed the pillow before it reached the bed, stretched his arm back, and flung the pillow forward to hit Lea in the face.

-which Saix reached forward and caught the pillow before it hit the bed. He swiftly rose above Axel with the pillow raised above his head, ready to throw it downwards at full force-

"That hurt Isa-!"

"If you would stop attacking me with pillows, Lea…"

He stopped mid-swing. Instead, Saix dropped the pillow onto Axel. It landed with a soft plop. Saix sat back down.

"That- Hey!" Axel removed the pillow from his face. He rubbed his elbow. "You didn't throw the pillow like you're supposed to! That kinda hurt actually…"

"That was when I was eight years old. I'm not a kid anymore." Saix looked away from Axel. That memory…

"Ah-ha! See?! You are living in your memories. Lea and Isa are not gone!" he sat up, a smug smile on his face, arms crossed. "Case and point."

"But that was in the past-they are people who we need to base ourselves off of now to-"

"Doesn't that bother you?"

"What-?" Saix was stunned. He stared back at Axel.

"I'm sure if it's been bothering me, it must be bothering you. I have not been feeling emotions but the actual memories that cause emotions. I feel like I'm reacting based on Lea, not on what would be my heart," He took a breath, and with a triumphant look on his face, he continued, "The reason why I want my heart back is so I can be a being that has a heart. I don't want to be based on Lea. I want to be Lea. I want to hang out with my buddy Isa again. Not someone who looks like Isa and can be like Isa."

Saix blinked a few times, and then closed his eyes. Why would it be when Lea was right, he would hit the nail on the head and break the board beneath it? Almost defeating the purpose of nailing the board in the first place.

He meant Axel. Lea was…

"Unfortunately, Xemnas is telling the truth about having no hearts, only memories," Axel said interrupting Saix's thoughts, "I believe that Xemnas is not lying about Kingdom Hearts- its completion will bring back our hearts. But I don't believe, not for a moment, that is his only goal. I think there's something else he wants and he's not telling us…"

"…Which means it can't all be that good…" Saix muttered.

"…For us," Axel was lying on the pillow, grinning, as Saix opened his eyes. There was still that annoying glint that would catch in the fire in his eyes whenever Lea-or Axel-was right.

Lea was still there. "You have a plan, don't you?" Just because Lea always had a plan, didn't mean it was well thought out.

"'Course I do! Sort of…" Axel looked out the window. Hesitation. At least he's showing it. "It's rather risky for both of us…"

"Since when have any of your grand plans never been dangerous?"

"Good point." Axel thought for a moment. "Actually, there was this one time…wait. I don't remember." He frowned, looking back at Saix. "Were they always this dangerous…?"

"Axel, you can tell me later when you do remember. Just tell me the plan." The sooner the better. The longer it would stew in his mind unattended, the greater the chance it would boil over and cause something poisonous to mutate.

"I think you should accept his offer." Saix raised an eyebrow. "Not just because he asked you to. I think, if you can get closer to him and his plans, you can figure out what's really going on in the higher circles. Then, we can plan around him and then knock him off this castle! Then you can take charge. That way, we can get out hearts back without worrying about whether Xemnas will get rid of us before then."

"Nice to you see you're working hard too." Saix put his elbow on his knee, resting his head on the palm of his hand. Some blue hair fell past his shoulders, dangling beside his arm. He felt his eyes bore into Axel's. There was still something else the fire was scheming.

"Don't bother thinking about who has the more dangerous job-we both do." The torch was still burning.

"Do tell. I'm afraid I don't quite see what you have to do." It flickered.

"I don't…really know either." Axel admitted quietly. "I mean, if you get closer to Xemnas, and give orders out, I know I'll be like the others; a tool to be used. We can't be friendly with each other when the others are around. If Xemnas sees you not relying on memories he may being to doubt you. You're our best shot of finding out what's really going on. I know you can pretend to dislike me, I mean you did it fine before but I…" Axel trailed off.

So Axel was afraid of messing up Saix's position. Lea did always say what was on his mind. But it looks like Axel is the same way. "It'll get easier over time." Axel nodded. "I'll just treat you harsher if you do step out of line again." Saix smirked. Axel looked a bit uneasy. There was still something else. The torch wasn't burning so bright anymore.

"You won't forget though? No matter how harshly you may treat me…" Axel rolled over, legs hanging awkwardly off the bed, back facing Saix. "…That we're friends. You got that memorized?"

Is that what he was afraid of? "Of course not. You know how powerful memories are. I would have to have no memories for that to happen."

"Of course. Then we'll do it." Axel didn't turn around. Saix sighed and crawled forward on the bed to lean over Axel, finding his green eyes staring back up at him with curiosity. "What?"

"You don't believe me," Saix stated. He put a hand down on the bed beside Axel to steady himself. Some strands of blue spilled down from his shoulders, tips brushing against Axel's body.

"I'm afraid," Axel exaggerated and rolled his eyes, "That you'll become so power hungry and get lost in Xemnas' other plans, causing you to forget about returning to a complete person." He smiled weakly up at Saix.

Saix didn't smile back nor did he frown. Axel was hiding something. The fire wasn't even real this time. It was…

"Have you seen those electric fires?" Lea's mom. "I know you really want a fireplace for our home but I can afford having a chimney being built in…" Isa was sitting at the top of the stairs. Guilty.

"It's not warm," Lea pouted. "It's not real."

Electric?

He felt a tug and a slight tighten of fabric around his neck. Axel was twirling one of the silver drawstrings of his black outfit with his hand absentmindedly. "Axel?" His eyes snapped back. A lighter was lit. Saix smiled, though his voice held a warning note, "Are you trying to…choke me?"

"Well, if you weren't going to move," Axel smirked, "I might have to kill you so I can move your dead body."

Saix moved away from Axel, the silver string slipping from his fingers. "How nice of you. I don't know if I want to bother working with you." He could feel a small smile on his face.

"It'll be worth it. I know you want Lea back. So until then, you have Axel to deal with. And I'll have to deal with a Saix." He faked a pout. "I dunno if I can," Axel said sitting up. Then suddenly his eyes lit up, fire burning like…

A forest fire. Wild and growing. Burning down any trees of logic that had grown in his mind however brief they may have lived. The trees would grow back, only to be burned down by that same illogical fire. Saix wasn't sure if he could survive another one of Lea's strange, ridiculous speeches that he would-

"So Saix…the hollow shell of Isa, who holds Isa's memories, I vow to work with you so I can once again be Lea," waving his arm, pointing to himself, "And so you can once again be Isa." Pointing to Saix, almost poking his eye, "So that neither one of us have to deal with just the hollow shells that haunt our memories of each other. Do you accept?"

Only Axel could make a speech as strange like the idiot Lea can be.

Saix felt his memories surfacing when Axel spoke that strange, but familiar speech. The words were not something Axel or Lea had said before. It was style of the speech he had before from someone else, and directed to someone other than him. The words were lingering and pulling at the threads where his memory was clipped.

He wonders if Axel remembers where he had heard those words, and why. He thinks about asking Axel, but then it might not be better to know. After all, he may not remember either.

Saix tilts his head to the side, feeling amused if he could call it. It didn't really matter where or why he heard the words anymore-the memory made him feel warm and even…happy. Being a Nobody may complicate things, but it also simplifies things too.

"I do…accept your offer."

OoooooO

A/N: Even though I said there were future chapters, this may feel like it ends here. That's because when I began to write this chapter, it was as a one-shot told from Saix. After some thought, I believed it should continue so I can keep the same past between the two without explaining it again in 'another story' of Axel and Saix.

So if you notice a bit…or a lot…of a style change, part way through the story, that's why.