TITLE: The Way They Are
AUTHOR: RaeAnne
RATING: PG…maybe PG-13, but there is not much there to be considered that.
SPOILERS: A Lost Son, um nothing much else really, there is a scene in this story that is like one in a previous episode, I can't remember the title off hand, but not an important plot scene.
DISCLAIMER: CSI Miami isn't mine, or so I've been informed, I'm still in denial. Don't sue, though if you wanted to trade something for Horatio Caine, offers will be reviewed. The song is by Lesley Gore, not mine either. Don't sue.
AUTHO'S NOTE: Hey :-) Well this is my second CSI:M story, I have one I am in the middle of now (When She Became The Target) but the idea came to me and since I've got most of my other story written I couldn't help but write this one. It's kind of a 'song fic', the song inspired it. This story is kind of out of character in places, forgive me.
Hope you enjoy it and leave lots of feedback! Thank You! –RaeAnne
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THE WAY THEY ARE
"Calleigh… Calleigh!" Horatio taped her arm.
"What?" she snapped sitting up quickly.
"You slept here again didn't you?" he stated arms folded as he took in her disheveled appearance, hair tousled.
"Yeah, so?" she glared pulling straight, as best she could her crumpled clothes and patted down her wayward blond locks.
"Wake up on the wrong side of that couch, Duquesne?" Eric grinned entering the break room.
"Keep your comments to yourself, Delko," she threw back feeling her head pound and her eyes sting from the sun streaming in.
"It's going to be a long day," Horatio muttered lowly as he came from around the counter a cup of coffee in hand.
"You've got fifteen minutes to get yourself together and meet me at the car, we've—got a scene to go back over," he handed her the cup and walked briskly out of the room.
"Tough case?" Eric leaned against the counter peeling an orange.
"You could say that. We've been trying to get blood from a stone it seems. It's a mess, I've been on ballistics, I haven't breathed fresh air since about this time yesterday!" she groaned stretching numb, tight muscles.
"When did you go to sleep?"
"About three I'd guess, it's all a blur at the moment," she headed towards the door. "Sorry about snapping at you Eric," she paused in the doorway and gave him a small smile. He nodded watching her go.
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"Ready?" Horatio asked as she approached his silver Hummer. She came towards him wearing a light colored skirt shit, looking better and more alert, chrome CI kit in hand.
"Always," she said in her familiar Southern drawl.
"Good," he nodded moving from where he had been waiting against the drivers door.
"I can't believe you remembered how I take my coffee, you must have a plethora of useless information," Calleigh mused slipping on her sunglasses.
"Not everything is as useless as it may first appear," Horatio tipped his head towards her. She couldn't see his eyes through his dark glasses, but she was sure there was a twinkle hidden there in his blue depths.
"Let's go catch the bad guys," she smiled brightly.
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"The bodies were found here…" Calleigh placed a scene reconstruction dummy, "and here…and here."
"Actually he was a little more to the left," a sweet accent broke in. The hair on the back of Calleigh's neck stood on end, as she cringed.
"Aww, Yelina, glad you could join us," Calleigh felt her mouth go dry.
"Good morning, Calleigh," Yelina's greeting was stiffly formal. "Horatio," she sent him a seductive 'come hither' glance, as she brushed up against him.
Horatio stood next to the Hummer, hands positioned on his hips, holding back the dark black jacket of his suit, revealing a perfect fitting deep ocean blue dress shirt, gun and badge glinting in the warm bright sun. "Yelina," he nodded looking her up and down, blessing her with a rare full fledged smile, as he looked her up and down.
Calleigh tried to ignore them and go on with work, but the red haired lieutenant kept her attention askew. "Why does he have to stare at her like he does! For Pete's sake Horatio…" she thought helplessly as Horatio spoke in low tones to Yelina who smiled devilishly.
"Head back home, Ray Jr. will be home soon, he'll want you there," Horatio nodded to her, then folding his arms over his chest as he watched her go. He watched every movement as she walked away. She didn't look once.
verse one
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"Calleigh, wake up," Horatio's harsh voice made her bolt upright.
"I am so, so, sorry Horatio! I was up late last night, I've been looking at the same bullets for hours…I…" she stumbled over her words as she wiped the sleep from her eyes.
"Don't let it happen again," he stated firmly, moving from the table he had been leaning against. Calleigh wondered how long she had been asleep, and how long he had been standing there.
"There you are H, Yelina was by looking for you," Eric pointed towards the reception area, Horatio didn't answer him just headed that way.
"What's got H, in such a huff?" Eric shuddered watching Horatio move with purpose out of sight.
"I don't know, I wish I did though. He was acting odd at the crime scene earlier, totally ignoring me and the scene, and you know he never over looks a thing," she sighed trying to again focus on the entrance wounds displayed on the screen.
"I don't know, he's been wrapped up with something…anyway why I came by, ran a trace on that print you sent over, clear match. A Mrs. Alice Brenner, got her address right here," he handed her a sheet of paper.
"Thanks, I just want to get this case over and done with, maybe get away from Horatio for a while, let things mellow out!" Calleigh put the paper in her pocket.
"Save the drama for your momma, right Cal?" Eric grinned, "Just hang in there, everything will come together, he'll see the light one of these days," he put a comforting hand on her shoulder.
"Maybe, but lets just hope the rest of us don't go blind in the process," she laughed starting out of the lab.
"Where are you going?"
Calleigh stopped in her tracks and turned on her heel, his tone was low, gritty and angry.
"To do my job," she didn't try to bite back her contempt.
"Okay—but you still didn't answer my question," he locked his eyes on her unmoving, head tipped just slightly to the side, arms folded.
"I've got a hit on the print we lifted from the gun, I'm going to talk to her," she finally said, offering him the paper with one hand, while the other positioned its self on her hip, the stare down wasn't going to get to a clear winner today.
He looked over the paper calmly and slowly, Calleigh glanced at her watch ready to scream.
"Well what are you waiting for?" Horatio asked blankly.
Calleigh's mouth fell open, the nerve! She would have slapped him right then, but shock paralyzed her, but then a smile began to crack, just a small one, pulling just at the corners of his mouth.
"Let's go shall we?" he pushed the elevator button.
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"You don't understand…Charlie is my world, why would I help you send him to jail?" Alice Brenner waved her arms in unbelief. The tall thin brunette was a little on the crazy side, Calleigh had come to think.
"Ma'am, we have a warrant to search your things because its your fingerprint on the murder weapon. Why are you so worried about Charlie?" Calleigh questioned.
"Because he did it…it was my gun but he did it," Mrs. Brenner raved.
"Excuse me?" Calleigh shook her head not grasping why the woman was so willing to declare her husbands guilt.
"Honey listen to me, when you've got a guy like Charlie…you get jealous real easy, see, want him to prove he loves you…and he does that by doing certain things see? Like taking care of someone who gives you a hard time…" Alice paused eyeing Horatio in the next room going through the gun safe.
"It's like your guy over there. Handsome, smart, cute butt…" Alice leaned in for another look, "Mmm, hmm…anyway it's obvious he's ga-ga over you, but I bet you still see red, and I don't just mean his hair," Alice paused to laugh at her own thought to be witty comment, "when he looks at another woman right?"
"What? He's not 'my guy' he's my boss!" Calleigh was quick to correct.
"Okay, what-ever, all I know is he has been watching you the whole time you guys have been here, and it wasn't no 'boss' eye' either! But if you are the one supposed to get the evidence to convict my Charlie, I'm going to say no more and ask for an attorney because it's clear you guys aren't very aware!" Alice laughed, leaning back against her chair inspecting her bright red nails, smacking her gum.
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"Well as stimulating as this case has been, I've not felt a real bed in ages, so I'm going to call it a night," Calleigh announced as she and Horatio returned to the crime lab.
"Sorry, you got to take another shift, we got a match on the gun from the Brenner case, homicide from six months ago," Horatio handed her a file from a briefcase.
"Horatio, I've had less then five hours sleep, I'm not trying to complain here, but pretty soon I'm not going to be able to stand up! This is insane, Charlie and Alice are in custody, as is the gun, they are not going to re-offend, at least not tonight! Let me get some sleep please!" she snapped angrily glaring at him.
"Sorry, you said you didn't want to complain, so don't. I'll be down in twenty minutes to give you a hand, I've got some things I need to take care of," he didn't seem to listen to what she said, just turned and headed up to his office, leaving Calleigh hurt and a temper on fire.
"Why does he just shut me out like that? Doesn't even put up a decent attempt at a real fight! Just answers and walks away! Grrr!" she thought face flush with new fury. She hated being so attracted to him but at the same time ready to ring his neck, it really put a dysfunctional aspect to things. "It's not fair that all I can do is silently want him, stand by as he puts all his hopes and affections into a woman whose feelings don't go beyond platonic flirtation!" Calleigh cursed herself, and him, as she looked up into the window of Horatio's office.
two
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"Hey Alexx, you needed me?" Calleigh appeared in the door of the morgue.
"Yeah, honey, got some tool marks for you to look at," Alexx beckoned her over.
Calleigh stood beside the body peering at medium, equally spaced circular puncture marks on a female caucasian's neck.
"Donna Wright, 35, found at a cemetery," Alexx read from her chart. "Poor dear, went to visit her mother…never saw it coming."
"Well…almost looks like they came from a hand rake, like you use to gardening," Calleigh observed probing the wounds.
"They knew where to aim, that's for sure, hit the jugular, bled out quickly," Alexx sighed.
"Did they find any weapons at the scene?" Calleigh questioned removing her latex gloves.
"No, they didn't—and I thought I had you on a different case," a deep, mellow, gritty, masculine voice filled the air.
"If I didn't know better I'd think the Man Upstairs was getting on to you" Alexx grinned before she turned her back away, busying herself with something else.
"I'm helping Alexx, when I'm done, I'll work on the Brenner case," she stated coolly, turning to look into the viewing theater.
"Fine, my office, ten minutes," Horatio's voice filled the room, wrapping around Calleigh, make her cringe. Calleigh turned to ask Alexx if that would be long enough.
"It'll have to be, angel," Alexx laughed.
"Fine, I'll be…" Calleigh turned to answer him, he was gone.
"That's the way boys are…" Alexx smiled.
"What way? Rude, condescending, demeaning, and trite? Boys will be boys? What kind of cop out is that? Humph, there is no excuse for the way Horatio has been treating me or the way he has been acting period, none, zero, zip!" Calleigh folded her arms anger coming on again.
"Calleigh what is today?" Alexx asked absently engrossed in her work.
"It's…it's Tuesday…" Calleigh hung her head as realization dawned on her.
"He's waiting for you," Alexx smiled.
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"Knock, knock," Calleigh tapped on the ajar door.
"Come in," he beckoned her.
"You wanted to see me?"
"I did," Horatio folded his hands unmoving.
"And?" she felt nerves threatening to stain her cheeks pink as he took in every detail of her from the floor up.
"And I've seen you, so you can go back to work," he dipped his chin, picking up a folder.
Calleigh just stared, "What? You have got to be kidding. You treat me like you hardly know I'm there, you insult me, treat me like some errand girl, running me like a greyhound and then you have the audacity to call me here and pull a stunt like this? Where do you get off?" she charged his desk.
He didn't flinch, most men would, but he didn't. Jut met her tic for tat, "Then why do you stay, if you hate it so bad?"
"What?" she was taken aback.
"Why do you put up with me? This job? This job is not easy, why do you subject yourself to it?" he locked onto her gaze unwilling to let it go.
"Are we talking about me…or you?" she dropped her voice, his intent gaze making her fidget.
"I know…I…I" Calleigh fought for the right words, "Horatio, I know it's the anniversary of your brother's death…I know that you still struggle with it every day, you are a good man who cares about his family, I know even though you try and convince everybody you don't, you still fight it, you don't have to go through it alone…" she trailed.
"How do you know what I am or am not going through?" he remained calm though his hardened eyes told other wise.
"I know that you've spent the entire day, ignoring me, pushing me…pushing me away. I didn't realize it at first, but you have pushing me away for far longer then just today. Don't tell me it's not your way of alleviating yourself of guilt because I know it is. Horatio Caine, the man who doesn't have a soul, why is it you try and make people believe that? Why do you push everyone away like you need no one?" she pleaded hands resting on his desk.
"You stand there, acting like you know me—you don't. My life is my work, my soul has been sold to this building of brick and glass. Today was the anniversary of Ray's death…but I am not haunted by that just today, your right, I am every—single—day! Then there is Speed, Tim Speedle, my CSI, my friend. I couldn't stop it with my brother and I couldn't stop it with Tim. The people in my life in my family and in my job are always taken. It's something I understand, and its why I wake up everyday knowing that I can't change the past I am responsible for…I will not let another innocent life fall because of me ," Horatio didn't raise his voice, it just grew colder and darker.
"I pushed you hard today, more so then I should have, but in this job you can't afford to let emotions get in the way. I was there the day you told Hagen you were walking my road, I have felt guilt every day since. You don't have to be like me, you don't have to sell your soul…for this," he gestured to his stark office. There was no sadness in his voice, no tangible emotion.
"Sorry, Horatio, doesn't work like that," Calleigh sat in one of the chairs, leaning across the desk. "You don't get to be the lone martyr here. I do know you, I know you, I know—I—know—you. I know you feel responsible for your brothers death, and now you feel responsible for the welfare of you sister-in-law and nephew. I know that you feel guilty about Speed, it was not your fault! But with all of this the thing is, you are a better CSI because of it. Horatio I watch you work and I am in awe. If this world had more people like you it would be a safer place, people would know the depth, the desire of single vision passion, but it would also be an empty place. You've fought for justice, for truth…for peace of mind, all these things you offer to Miami. You have a soul, you have a heart and I know that it all hasn't been sold out. I don't know why you can't see it, or why you wont, but it's there, you just have to find it. I am walking this road with you because its my road too. Your destination is mine, and the funny thing is you don't even know or care that I am always right there…" Calleigh stood moving for the door, tears ready to fall.
"Find your soul Horatio, it's not a building, it's not a job…it's what keeps you breathing, keeps you going, keeps you alive, not just being!" she bit her lip and quickly left.
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Quiet, everybody is finally gone. Calleigh stares at the rain hitting the window of her small lab corner. Night shift would be arriving soon, but now caught in limbo she cried, praying time would stop, that time would cease and she could remain in these moments never going back, never moving forward.
"I love him and he'll never know, never care," she chastised herself for wallowing, but she missed him, missed the talks, the banter, knowing somehow that it would be all gone from now on.
A loud knock made her turn. Her heart was about to explode, she blinked, he still remained. She slowly stood damning her eyes she knew would be red and puffy. She slowly unlocked the lab door not being able to look at his face.
"You told me to find my soul…" Horatio paused his voice so low, so deep and gravelly it made Calleigh shiver.
"I found it," Horatio finished. Calleigh didn't realize what was happening at first, all she felt was pressure. Pressure from his hands, one tilting her head towards him, the other pressing her into the door jam, pressure of firm, warm, tender lips pressing onto hers. She gasp against his mouth, realizing he meant her, she kissed him back with all the fever, passion, anger and joy she had, wrapping her arms around his neck, she pressed herself as close as humanly possible.
three
"I am sorry, sorry for closing you out, for not seeing. You are my opposite, you are my equal. You balance me out. I didn't realize how bad I needed you. I didn't realize that after Speed dying you were the one at the end of the day I needed comfort from, I didn't realize that when Ray died that you were there—just waiting for me to see you. You were my soul when I didn't have one, you are my soul, my heart now when I need one the most. I need you Calleigh—I just need—you," he whispered into her neck as he hugged her close.
"Oh Horatio, I need you too, I want you," she trailed smiling into his shoulder, savoring him.
"Do you want to go to my office so we can talk?" she asked softly, running his hand through her hair. She pulled away, looking into his face and said with a playful smile, "Sure, but do we have to talk?"
Horatio couldn't hold back the small laugh, "We can do whatever you like Beautiful," he grinned kissing her lips quickly and lightly.
"Beautiful?" she breathed eyes large.
He dipped his chin and looked at her lovely face, trying to hide the grin he felt coming on, "No? Okay, how about Gorgeous?" He kissed the corner of her mouth.
She was speechless.
"Let's go talk shall we?" he took her hand and pulled her towards his office.
"Ya, know Lt. Caine I've always had a fantasy about this office of yours…that desk, it's large isn't it?" she breathed her voice sexy and low, tantalizing Horatio's senses. She turned to face him pausing in front of the closed door.
"Really?" he arched an eyebrow, an arm snacking around her waist pulling her near as his lips crashed on hers.
"What are you doing she?" she gasped feeling her feet leave the ground, she grabbed hold of his neck out of reaction.
"I have my own fantasy Miss Duquesne—or should I say Jane?" he grinned throwing open the door.
"Let me guess, you Tarzan, me Jane?" she cooed into his ear before her tongue traced its outline.
"Mmm, and this is our tree house," he said.
"I can deal with that, Handsome," she purred.
A loud crash could be heard throughout the lab, followed by a girlish giggle…and a roar?
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"That shirt is almost the color of the one H, was wearing yesterday," Eric looked Calleigh up and down as she stood behind the break room counter filling the coffee pot.
"Really?" she had to struggle to keep a straight face.
"That is the shirt Horatio, was wearing yesterday," the statement came from a woman, a dark haired woman.
"Yelina! How nice to see you this morning,' Calleigh sung sweetly, a bright smile flashing.
"Where is Horatio?" she nearly spat.
"Well, I'm really not sure, he was in his office, but I'm not sure now. Isn't a divine day?" Calleigh shrugged. Yelina stalked out of the room tossing back an irritated glance. Eric just stared at Calleigh, she was acting even more chipper then usual.
"Is it Horatio's shirt?" Eric gulped.
"Hmm? Yes, Horatio and were playing Twister last night…" she begun.
"Twister?" Delko's eyes grew large.
"You know figuratively speaking, lots of paper work…desk—work, anyway, I ended up getting ink all over the back of mine so Horatio lent me his, no big deal," she beamed.
"Huh, okay, well that color really makes your eyes look bright," Eric shrugged not understanding her explanation, but oh well. That shirt did make her eyes glow, wow the difference a shirt can make! He left shaking his head.
Calleigh smiled to herself running a hand down her, well Horatio's, shirt at her waist, and her cream colored skirt, humming quietly.
"Somehow, I don't think it's just the shirt that is making your eyes bright this morning," a deep voice let her know that he was there.
"No, Lieutenant, I don't think it is," she smiled seductively, voice playful. She turned back to pouring the coffee. She heard his footsteps move, then stop behind her.
"You know, it's a shame about your shirt, next time we'll make sure the desk is cleared off all the way before we do our paperwork. But for the record Duquesne, you look good in my shirt," he grinned pulling back her hair, starting to run kisses up and down her neck.
"Come on Tarzan, back to work," she smiled, turning around in his arms which had been placed on either side of her on the counter, keeping her entrapped between them. His coffee cup between them. He eyed the cup, then her. He sighed took the cup and stole a kiss and turned away.
four
She watched him go, he turned and gave her a small wink, she memorized his strong, perfect back and closed her eyes and sighed, "What a man!"
"Twister, my foot!" Eric muttered watching Horatio go by.
That's the way boys are…
The End
(the happily ever after kind)