This is not a Mary Sue, though it may seem like one before you've read it. Really it's one big comedy (and if you look at it from one point of view, it really makes fun of Mary Sue's). The main characters. Elise and Carrie spend most of their time being hated and accused of being insane than loved and being called perfect (like certain Mary Sue's are). Most of this came to light after drinking case after case of pure sugar (Mountain Dew) and realising some pretty funny things about anime, and animefans. One important things to keep in mind that this is all in good humour, there are a lot of spoilers and swear words and absolutely no plot whatsoever, just a concept of an entire school being overrun by anime characters (and the odd celebrity).
Juuban High - Day 1
Story by: Elise Haskell and Carrie Rose
Written by: Carrie Rose
Edited by: Elise Haskell
The first day of school has never been 'good', but this year... well let's just say it was a little... different than normal. Yes, different than normal sounds like a good way to describe it. You know it's going to be a year to remember when you get a sense of déja-vu walking in. The high school my friend Elise and I transferred to is called Juuban High School. You may be wondering how we got a sense of déja-vu from that? Well, easy. It's the school in Sailor Moon. As if that isn't weird enough, the teachers and the students were all pretty wacky as well.
We whipped out our schedules - all the same classes, of course, and we see that the teacher's last names are all a little too familiar.
Period 1 - Computers - Yuy
Period 2 - Drama - Maxwell
Period 3 - Science - Albatou
Period 4 - Math - Vegeta
"It's just a coincidence," Elise says, and practically drags me down the stairs to the computer lab. Walking in, I see familiar unruly brown hair, and a glimpse of Persian blue eyes.
"Holy shit!" I whisper to Elise, eyes wide. The teacher was definitely Heero Yuy. Why was he teaching? Isn't he a Gundam pilot?
"Um, Mr. Yuy, sir?" Elise asked.
Heero looked up at us with those intense eyes that I could get lost in... oh right! Back to the story! "Aren't you a Gundam pilot?" Elise questioned him.
"No. Omae o kurosu." He pulled out his gun, pointed it at her, and put it down on the desk for all to see.
Elise sat down, knowing that she was out of harm's way. After all, if he threatens someone, you know he isn't going to live up to that threat. I took the seat beside her, which happened to be in front of his desk. Now I wonder how THAT happened? The bell rang and the kids took their seats.
"Okay, class, my name is Mr. Yuy, and I'm going to teach you some basic computer skills that you WILL need, like hacking. I just have three simple rules. 1: Shut up. 2: Leave me alone. 3: This gun is here for a reason. Disobey me, and I will use it. Got it?" The kids all nodded, no one saying a word. Talk about intimidation.
The class went pretty well, come to think of it. No one talked too much, and Heero didn't even have to use his gun! We were just getting used to the class when the bell rang and it was off to our favourite class - drama. Elise had gotten very optimistic. After all, if Yuy was Heero, then Maxwell must be Duo, right? We were about to find out that she was right.
We walked into the drama studio and as I put down my bags, I noticed something very wrong with Elise. She was standing on the riser, eyes wide, and mouth hanging open. Following her gaze to the teachers desk, I saw a long braid, a baseball hat, and a cross hanging around his neck. She moved a chair over to beside the desk, and started rambling on to him.
"Is your name Duo Maxwell? Your Deathscythe is the coolest thing I've ever seen and your hair is so nice, can I touch it? I love your hair. In fact I love you. Marry me!"
Duo just looked at her, speechless.
"Now Elise, see what you did? You rendered him speechless! I'm sorry about her, Mr. Maxwell - can I call you Duo? Okay, anyway, she's just a little crazy. Ignore her and she'll be fine. Really." I slapped Elise upside the head and she snapped out of it, giving me one of her famous death glares. I was used to it, so I just sat down beside her, keeping her in line. If I weren't there, she most likely would have glomped on poor Duo and that definitely wouldn't have turned out good.
The bell rang, and a boy sat down beside Elise. "Hi, I'm Youji."
Elise smiled, I think she was getting used to all the anime characters walking around. "Hi! I'm Elise."
They started talking and that's when I tuned out. Duo stood at the front of the class and started introducing the rules. "I only have one rule in this class, and that's that you can do whatever you'd like, as long as you don't interrupt me. Understood? I only have a little bit to say..." That little bit ended up taking the whole period. He started out talking about what to expect of the class, and then he started talking about why we would like drama, and then he started talking about himself and his life. He just wouldn't shut up. I had a feeling that all his classes would end up like this. Oh well, I guess if we listened attentively, we'd get A's easily. Nothing's wrong with that, right?
The bell rang and it was time for lunch. Duo was the first person out of the class, and he ran down the hall to the caf. I guess he was hungry. Elise, Youji and I walked into the caf where we saw the janitor. Now I have to admit, I was scared. He was wearing an orange gi, and he was eating the table he was sitting at. Immediately, we knew it was Goku. Obviously his brains had gotten him far in life.
"You know, I don't know if I want to find out who the lunch lady is here..." I said, looking at the cafeteria door with fear.
"Oh, she's really nice sometimes, but other times she can be a real bitch. Just look at how her hair is. If it's down, it's her nice personality. If it's in two buns, it's her mean personality." Youji explained casually.Elise and I exchanged a look and said "Lady Une?" in unison.
"Yep, how did you guess?"
"Um... just a stab in the dark!" Elise answered.
Slowly we entered the cafeteria and bought fries.
"Why hello dear! Here are your fries!" Lunch Lady Une said to Elise.
Elise smiled politely, "thank you," as she did not want to get on Lady Une's bad side. When it was my turn, I got a "TAKE YOUR FOOD AND GO!!" from her. I did as I was told, scared out of my wits. Lady Une is a very scary lady, even scarier in person.
Elise undid her white uniform shirt, as she was wearing a black tank top underneath. Suddenly the vice principal came up to her, in SD form. He was about three feet tall in this form and was wearing a cute triangular hat thing. "Uniform infraction, no da! Do up your shirt, no da!"
"Chichiri!" I smiled and did my best not to hug him and take him home with me. Elise grumbled, but did up her shirt part way.
"All the way, or you will see the principal, no da!" Chichiri said as he transformed into his full size."Um... okay." Elise said nonchalantly and did up the rest of her shirt.
Another vice principal happened to walk by and we all recognized the ponytail he wore. "Quick! Does anyone have cold water?" Elise said, looking frantic.
Youji passed her a water bottle that he had just pulled from his bag. "Why do you need it?" He questioned.
"Oh, you'll see... Mr. Saotome!" Elise called the other vice principal over.
Mr. Saotome came over. "What?"
Elise opened the bottle of water and splashed it at him. In front of our eyes the VP transformed from a male into a female. Everyone had learned Ranma's secret.
"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone that you're a cross-dresser." She said, an evil smile playing across the features of her face.
"IT'S NOT CROSS DRESSING!" Ranma yelled, stamping her feet. "It's a curse I can't get rid of!"
"Sure, that's what they all say." She said, getting up to leave. Youji and I followed her, laughing hysterically at the scene that had just went down.
"What do we have now?" I questioned, getting up the narrow stairs to the main floor.
"Science," Elise answered. We parted with Youji as he didn't have any more classes with us and went up to the science wing. A teacher with grey hair and reddish eyes greeted the class.
Elise sat down right in front of Mr. Albatou's desk, giddy with glee at the fact that her science teacher was Dilandau.
"Okay class, our first experiment will be one involving fire." He said, and started lighting a match. "Moero! MOERO!!! MWA HAHAHAHAHA!!" He screamed, adding the insane laughter at the end, which also gradually got louder. The class looked on in fear, but Elise was mesmerized. He continued playing with the fire, and occasionally saying "MOERO, FANEL VAN!!" which of course, only made the kids a little wearier of him, but not Elise, who still stared at him, her eyes glazed over. Even after the bell rang, she still sat there and stared. I had to forcibly drag her out of the class.
She sighed, and looked back at the science class door. "I think I'm in love," she stated.
"That's nice," I said, knowing she would say that all day. It just wasn't fair that two of her favourite guys were her teachers, whereas I only had one of my favourite guys as my teacher. Ah well, I'd live.
We walked into math and got a huge shock. It wasn't unexpected, yet it was in a weird way. We didn't think that our math teacher would actually be Vegeta! It HAD to be, the spiky hair, the armour, and the way he sat: back straight, arms crossed, eyes closed, head down... there was no one else it could have been.
When everyone was seated, Vegeta stood up and began to speak. "Now, I don't want you little brats getting in my way. I don't want to be here, you don't want to be here, so leave me alone and I'll leave you alone. Am I making myself clear?"
Everyone nodded. "Hey, teacher, you have a receding hairline." some smart-ass kid called out. I think that was the biggest mistake of the kid's life, because right after he said that, he was being hit with an energy blast.
"Does anyone else want to make any smart comments, or will we all get down to work? Oh right, the rules. 1. Leave me the hell alone. 2. I don't like you. Don't ask for help. And 3. Don't bug me. I will give you an energy blast. Do not tempt me."
"Wow... can you turn super saiyan?" Some other kid asked.
"Yes, and no I will not do it."
"We should all have a fivesome." Elise said, very dazed.
Vegeta raised an eyebrow and blinked at her, a huge reaction for him, but didn't say anything.
"Is that a yes?" Elise questioned. She got no answer, and took it as a yes anyway. I shook my head and raised my hand.
"Since you're here... is your really hot son here too?"
Vegeta glared at me and I sunk back down in my chair, but meekly asked the same thing Elise did, "is that a yes?"
"Yes. Now piss off, woman."
I grinned. That would be my mission tomorrow: to find Trunks!
Elise was still talking about the fivesome, and got some very confused looks from Vegeta and the rest of the class stared at her like she was out of her mind. Her eyes glazed over and she simply stared at Vegeta. "Since when did school get so good? Since when did teachers become so hot? I think I'm really going to like this place..." With that, the bell rang, and everyone left. While going to our lockers, we saw a very strange site. The other vice principal, Ryouga Habiki, walking around, obviously lost.
"Where are you Ranma Saotome? I WILL GET REVENGE!" He said and with that, proceeded to walk the wrong way, right into the staff bathroom. We didn't see him come out. Maybe he got lost in there...
For more Juuban High fun, got to: geocities dot com slash juubanhigh1