Drifting in the darkness
it was painful waking up in the middle of the night to find the bed cold beside you. Thor is gone...again
it has been an occurrence lately sometimes he will come really late or like today he will just vanish in the middle of the night
i pretend to not notice i pretend to believe the excuse that he was working but i know
Jane foster
i first thought it was a one night stand but no more he meets her every time not just sex but he had courted her he seemed so enchanted with her. it downed on me that he has fallen for her
does she know he is dating someone... a male lover to bout did he bother to mention me. am i being left behind for a female. he always have been straight i thought he loved me for real that he didn't care that i was even a man. and i know he is too kind, afraid to hurt me that he doesn't even want to dump me and i just want to exploit that so that he stays with me to chain him to me... but it hurts
should i act oblivious
should i just leave
i never knew this cowardly part of me but i love him still i dont want to leave him maybe he will get tired of her ..
"Loki you awake?" i could hear apprehension in his voice
"...yeah." my voice trembled i felt weak , pathetic
"Loki..." he started to say as he sat beside me "its okay... i just woke up " i pulled myself up
hoping,
praying, but for what
i was sure he can see the tremble of my shoulders "where were you Thor "
silence first then the words that made everything crash down the bitter truth said in a soft whisper "you know where i was " i closed my eyes as tears fell freely ...ah how much it hurts
"Loki..."
"please..." it came so soft that the only indication that he had heard me was the silence that followed
-fin-