In the Lonely Hour

First-timer. Nothing belongs to me except an old Ford and a cat named Larry. All feedback appreciated. Thanks!

*Set in the Enchanted Forest during the missing year.

Chapter One: Wounded Animal

She didn't think she would ever grow accustom to sharing her castle with anyone. When Pan's curse washed over her, she expected to live out the rest of her life in the solitude of her misery, her life without Henry. However, here she was in what was once her castle, sharing it now with everyone from Snow to commoners from nearby villages. The elitist within her threatened to rise every time she ate dinner across from one of them.

Regina had to admit to herself that living in Storybrooke had mellowed her in many ways. She was not as temperamental as she had once been, and with the notion of making Henry proud still lingering within her, the previously unbearable had become bearable. For instance, sitting across from an ineptly named Prince Charming and a common thief during a meal would once have sent her into frenzy. In fact, moments like this brought to mind fleeting thoughts of the many ways she could kill them while not spilling her soup. However, cooler heads always seemed to prevail. She counted it as a daily miracle.

She simply wasn't happy, and while she knew that saving Henry had meant giving him up, Regina was not quite sure how to carry the weight of that grief. She often thought that in comparison, being a prisoner to King Leopold and the once insufferable Snow White was a day at the beach. At least now, she could come and go as she pleased, but with no hope of ever seeing her son again, what was freedom?

In the few days since they had been back she had come to accept that her sanity rested ironically upon current and former enemies. This Wicked Witch presented her with someone to hate, someone to occupy her mind, and someone to plot against. Snow, on the other hand, was ever-present and concerned. Though annoying, Snow was also the strongest connection to Henry that Regina had left. Regina spent most of her time alone, whether in her chambers or in the library. Snow would often seek her out, eventually learning that the Queen preferred silence to chitchat or hope speeches. Regina had given up on the biting comebacks and insults in those moments, knowing that Snow would only stay longer and take those strikes as signs of some kind of emotional turmoil. However true it may have been, Regina didn't want to elongate the visits by any means, so she just accepted that Snow would check on her from time to time.

However, those standards certainly did not extend to anyone else in the castle. Everyone else was fair game for verbal assault. Today was no different, and the meal she was sharing with Snow, Charming, and the rest was becoming more and more excruciating with every syllable. Regina sat at the end of the table with her head resting in her hand as if nursing a headache, staring at her company simply wondering how she had ended up here with these people.

The Prince discussed possible strategies for finding the Wicked Witch between bites of his dinner, eliciting several eye-rolls from Regina's end of the table.

"There must be a way to track her," the thief chimed in. "She cannot vanish into thin air."

Regina cringed every time he spoke. He, more than most, seemed to drive home her archaic beliefs about separation of the classes. She listened, or failed in her attempts to ignore him, for as long as she could before striking, "Look. I'm sure that wherever it is that you come from and whatever it is that you hunt for your table can be tracked through the mud and taken down with a home-spun weapon, but this is a much more sophisticated prey. This witch is above your pay-grade, so I would suggest that you leave it to people who have experience with real enemies."

Regina could feel Snow's eyes glaring at her, disapproving of her statements, but Regina knew that the line between condescending banter and hurling fireballs across the table was thin today. At least condescension did not leave a lasting scar.

The thief quickly rebutted, "As I recall, I eluded you and your Black Knights more times than I believe you would like to discuss, so I would say that your opinion isn't as valid as you'd like everyone to believe, your Majesty." The bite to which he ended his sentence left Regina with a particular distaste for him, and without hesitation, Regina snapped, "This coming from a man who could not save his own wife, much less anyone else."

The knowledge she had gained from their excursion into the castle acted as a weapon in her arsenal. Before she could reveal the satisfied smirk rising on her face, Regina was struck by the quiet at the table. Now, Snow was not the only one glaring at her, and the thief excused himself from the table without another word, bowing out gracefully from their sparring match. Regina felt the urge to follow suit and retreat to somewhere away from the audience, but she knew that leaving would only make her appear remorseful. That is the last thing she wanted most of the people at this table to see.

As they all finished dinner, Snow followed Regina down the hall toward her chambers, and Regina knew that she was going to be patronizingly scolded for her words at the table.

As they made their way through the doors of Regina's chambers, Regina spouted, "I don't want to hear it, Snow. Just leave me be."

"Regina, you should not have spoken to him that way. We all understand that you need to arrogantly strut around the castle and demean anyone within five feet, but what you said to Robin was more than your incessant need to hear yourself talk. It was cruel."

Snow was not just irritated. She was angry, and it had been a long time since Regina had seen her angry. Though it somewhat caught her off guard, she wouldn't have shown it. Regina never turned around to even face Snow. She decided to let her say her piece, then go on about her evening.

"Regina! Do you hear me?" Still, Regina continued about rearranging her dressing table and pulling pins from her hair. "Regina, when we all came back here, I hoped that it would be a fresh start for all of us. In many ways, it is. We are all working together to find this witch, and we are all living here under the same roof without killing one another," Snow paused. "I just think that existing under the same roof isn't going to be enough for you. You have to make at least some effort. I'm not saying that you have to win person of the year around here, but I just want you to give yourself the chance to really have that fresh start." At this point, Snow knew she was being tuned out, but she couldn't help but add, "If someone had used Henry to cut you that deeply, then it would certainly have been the last words they uttered. I can't say I would blame you for that. I just think you owe Robin an apology. He is trying to help us. He is on your side too." With that, Snow left Regina to her rearranging.

Regina heard the door come to a close, and she was suddenly a bit uncomfortable being alone with her thoughts. As quickly as the thoughts rose, she tried to shove them away, but she had reluctantly heard Snow. Deep down, she knew Snow was right. Regina needed to win and arguments with this thief were particularly important to her to win, so she had used whatever was necessary. Now though, she regretted it. The question was how could she fix the mess she created without being friendly or, God forbid, outright apologizing? She was proud of the person she had become for Henry, but moments like this reminded her why being the Evil Queen was much easier than being Regina Mills.