In the Name of Love
This story was inspired by the song "If It Hadn't been for Love" by Adele. I love the pairing of Robin and Dean but for some reason every fiber of my being was screaming to write this so I listened and this is what I came up with.
"What are you in for?" My new cellmate asked me as I walked into the cold 6x6 room.
"Love for a man who really didn't love me the way that I thought he did." I responded.
"What's your name?" she asked
"Robin. Robin Scorpio." I told her.
"Well I'm Lorena. Robin welcome to the only home you are going to have until you die." She laughed in a raspy tone.
As I sat down on my bed two words kept going around in my head: Dean. Winchester. He was the reason I was in here wishing that I was free. It all started when he rolled into town and he flashed me that smile. The one that I was willing to kill over, I guess I actually did. I was just 17 when I met him and he promised the world and everything in it and now look at me I am in the this cold place with a stranger not with my Uncle Mac or my little brother Ethan or my little sisters Maxie and Georgie, I'm not even in Port Charles, New York I'm in Baton Rouge, Louisiana a long ways from home. He did this to me; he took away everything that was dear to me.
We were together for a year, the best year of my life. Everyone said that I shouldn't trust him because he was a stranger, a con man, a loner, and that's what you call a recipe for trouble. I was a girl who fell for the bad boys first Stone, then Jason, and finally Dean. Dean was worst of all because he was a master of disguise and a master manipulator. Ahhhhh! I'm so angry with myself, I am the daughter of Anna Devane and Robert Scorpio, I was supposed to be smarter than this and see that he was no good for me. I guess that's what I get for seeing the best in people, I end up ignoring all the bad and end up with all the hurt and pain.
Even though I hate him, I still love him. I remember it like yesterday when he came into the Outback and he sat at a table in the back.
*Flashback*
"Hello welcome to the Outback, what can I get you?" I asked him.
"A glass of water and your name." he replied.
"I'm Robin. Would you like anything else?" I asked.
"Care to join me?" he asked.
"As nice as that sounds I have other customers to tend to so I'll get you that glass of water. Feel free to look over the menu so you can decide what you want and I'll be back." I said.
"I already know what I want and it's not on the menu." He said as he intently looked at me.
"Excuse me, sir." I said quietly.
"Dean. My name is Dean." He replied.
"Okay well excuse me Dean." I said and hurried away from the table and placed his order.
*End of Flashback*
I remember he order a plate of spaghetti and he watched me the whole night and waited until I was off before he would leave. I remember Uncle was about to blow a gasket until Felecia calmed him down and he went home. I should have known that that was going to be the beginning of the end; I guess that I'm not as smart as I thought I was.
After that day he kept coming back to the Outback and he would stay for my whole shift and then he would take me for walks and he would let me babble on and on about my day. He was sweet. Sometimes we would go to the park or the docks and just talk for hours about everything and about nothing. After six months of dating he invited me to live with him. I was so overjoyed.
*Flashback*
"Robin there's something that I want to ask you." He said.
"Okay what is it?" I asked confused.
"Will you move in with me?" he asked.
"What? Are you serious?" I questioned him.
"Yes. These six months have been the best six months of my life. I can't even remember a time I have smiled more, except when my mother was alive. Please tell me you will say yes? I need you like I need air. I love you so much Robin." He pleaded.
"Okay. I will move in with you. I love you too." I replied.
*End of Flashback*
I think that those two lines set my heart on fire. He made me feel loved. It was different from what I had with Stone or Jason. I could his love and passion for me radiating from him. Sometimes I like to think that that way he felt in that moment was the way that he always felt for me, even to the bitter end.
We were happy those six months, weren't we? At least that's what I thought but I guess he had other thoughts. He left me two weeks after my birthday. I cried everyday for 3 weeks straight to Brenda and Lois. Then one day I stopped crying for myself, I stopped pitying myself and decided to do the only thing that I thought was logical at that time; I tracked him down. I found out he was in Louisiana, so that's where I was headed.
Never would've hitchhiked to Birmingham
If it hadn't been for love
Never would've caught the train Louisiana
If it hadn't been for love
Never would've run through the blinding rain
Without one dollar to my name
If it hadn't been, if it hadn't been love
Against everyone's pleads I went late at night and I hitchhiked. I figured if I took my car then someone would report it stolen and I would be watched like a hawk or if I took a plane or bus the same thing would happen. At the time all that I thought was I have to get to Dean never about my safety. I could have been killed hitchhiking but I didn't care. Dean always had that affect on me, I always was so cautious before him and while I was with him I took so many risks and chances with my life, you would think that I would be dead by now, I guess I am. The people I was travelling with stopped in Birmingham so I caught a train to Louisiana and it was raining when I got there. I rain around trying to find shelter, I end up in some kind of run down motel and I waited out and came up with a plan that involved my .44 ,that my dad gave me on my 13th birthday, that I brought along.
Never would've seen the trouble that I'm in
If it hadn't been for love
Would've been gone like a wayward wind
If it hadn't been for love
Nobody knows it better than me
I wouldn't be wishing I was free
If it hadn't been, if it hadn't been love
I never thought rationally when it came to Dean. I just will never understand how one man had that much power over me. In my mind I said that I just wanted to talk to him and find out why he left me, but in my heart I knew that I was going to kill him. Now I'm wishing that I could turn back the hands of time and should have just stayed in Port Charles. I wish that Uncle Sean or Frisco could save me but they have no clue just like Uncle Mac and the rest of Port Charles. There was no trail. A barroom full of people saw what I did. I just wish that I was still in Port Charles crying on Brenda and Lois' shoulders eating Chocolate ice cream and Chocolate cake in my pajamas, but instead am I with here with Lorena a bunch of other females eating something I wouldn't give a pig. I wish I was free.
Four cold walls against my will
At least I know he's lying still
Four cold walls without parole
Lord have mercy on my soul
Never would've gone on that side of town
If it hadn't been for love
Never would've took a mind to track him down
If it hadn't been love
Never would've loaded up a .44 and
Put myself behind a jail house door
If it hadn't been, if it hadn't been for love
I walked into that seedy bar and I called out his name, he was startled. He was talking to some redhead with messed up teeth and a scar above her eye. He left me for her. I would have laughed and walked away if I wasn't so angry with him.
*Flashback*
"Dean!" I yelled.
"Robin?" he turned around confused.
"Who were you expecting the boogeyman?" I sarcastically asked.
"What are you doing here?" he demanded once the shock wore off.
"I'm here to ask you a question." I coolly responded.
"Yeah, what's that?" he inquired of me.
"Would you like to die a slow painful death or a quick painless one?" I asked coldly.
"What?" he looked at me confused.
"Too late you hesitated." I said and shot him two times in the heart with my .44. I felt no regret, but I felt avenged.
I walked out of the bar and back to my hotel room where the cops eventually found me. No guilt, no remorse, no struggle. I knew what I did and why I did it, too back it sunk in later. Actually sunk in when those bars clanked together. I knew then that my life was over and that I would be hoping and wishing for a miracle, but unfortunately that is never going to happen no matter how much I want it to.
Four cold walls against my will
At least I know he's lying still
Four cold walls without parole
Lord have mercy on my soul
Never would've hitchhiked to Birmingham
If it hadn't been for love
Never would've caught a train to Louisiana
If it hadn't been for love
Never would've loaded up a .44 and
Put myself behind a jail house door
If it hadn't been, if it hadn't been for love
If it hadn't been, if it hadn't been for love
If it hadn't been, if it hadn't been for love
I did all of this in the name of love now here I am away from my family and friends wishing that I was free, wishing that I never met him. But I guess that's all that I have are wishes and prayers. Maybe he will hear on of my prayers and grant one. I am 18 years old and I will be behind this jail house door until I die. Was it worth it? Do I wish that I can do all over again? Was love the motivator or lack thereof? Why am I torturing myself by thinking about Dean and could've, would've, should've? This is my life because of a man who never really deserved me. I guess that he learned that the old adage was true "Hell Hath No Fury like a Woman Scorned".