In Your Arms (I Can Sleep)
Truth was, Morgana couldn't remember the first time she had been woken by a nightmare — too many years ago. Gaius had given her potions, a midwife had given her a necklace, and every one seemed to have an opinion on how it could be solved; but nothing truly worked. Sleep was hard coming and fast in disappearing, leaving her awake and scared with her own dreams.
Then, Gwen had shown up. She had been just a girl, a normal, adorable girl, but it had changed everything.
The potions did not become more efficient. The necklace had been tossed away long time ago. All advices had been tested time and time again only to end in nothing. And yet — it got better, somewhat.
Although she had her own house, upon discovering about the nightmares, Gwen had taken to sleeping in the servant quarters. Morgana hated it — she knew her screaming must stop the girl from resting as she should from all the hard work she did during the day; but as much as she tried to tell the girl to leave, it was no use. Gwen was the perfect servant for her because she was as headstrong as her mistress, even if she hid it with sweetness instead of bare steel.
Morgana would wake up yelling, crying, and Gwen would come out of the her small bedroom — soft and solicitous, ready to calm her down. She would bring warm drinks, and be free with her hugs. She would use her fingers to comb her messy hair, and lead her back to sleep. While Morgana was awake, so was she — always waiting until she was sure sleep had come again before leaving.
It was only natural that, on day, she would sleep before her mistress.
Morgana knew she should tell her to go back to bed, but it was so difficult to let go - Gwen was reclined on her bed, her hand still buried inside her hair when her breathing became steadier, heavier. Morgana thought about calling her, but she was so warm — so soft — and just curling up against her, forehead pressed against her maid's tights, seemed like the best thing in the world.
Gwen had apologized profusely and continuously the following day.
Morgana hadn't minded.
The following night she made a point of putting her head on Gwen's lap as she woke in the middle of the night.
The following morning, Gwen merely smiled and blushed.
It all happened naturally after that.
Gwen couldn't be around all nights, but when she was, she would no longer move to her servant's room. She allowed Morgana to pull her into the big, royal bed and held her close until she slept. Sometimes, Morgana, too, would hold her close and count her breathing as it guided her to sleep. It was soothing — Gwen's smell, the heat of her body, the rhythm of her breathing. It allowed her to relax, it grounded her where she was, chasing the nightmares away.
In Gwen's arms, she could finally sleep again.
(And as they grew apart, they returned — stronger, more bitter, more despairing and there was no comfort to be had anywhere).