Written for the Shipping Week at the Caesar's Palace forum. Prompt: Flamingo

WC: 419

I'm trash bye

"Hey, you up?"

Victor's voice jolted Yuuri right awake, and he'd been having a pleasant dream about having a single day of peace at the ice rink, too. "Now I am," he muttered, twisting around in bed after a glance at the clock.

The street lights illuminated Victor's face, and his expression was one he only had when he was about to say something really groundbreaking, like, "Starting today, I'm your coach."

So, of course Yuuri paid attention.

"Have you ever seen a flamingo switch legs?"

Yuuri stared blankly. "Victor. It's four in the morning."

"No, really," Victor continued. "They stand on one leg and I've never seen one of them switch their standing leg. It's insane. They have amazing stamina."

"Maybe you should learn something from them, then," Yuuri said without missing a beat.

"Listen," Victor pressed, earnestly grasping Yuuri's hand. "I just had a dream about. I think it could be a breakthrough in my choreographing Yurio's short program."

Yuuri raised an eyebrow, hoping that Victor would be able to see his skepticism in the dark. Years of marriage with that man had instilled in him a very strong sense of sass.

Victor paid no heed and continued to talk in his hushed tone. "My idea is going to revolutionize the sport by introducing femininity and masculine assholery to the sport. Are you on board?"

A pause. "Um, not if Yuri's not."

"He will be. I'm his coach, so he has to do what I say."

Yuuri raised his other eyebrow for maximum skepticism levels. "Like you ever listened to Yakov."

Victor pursed his lips. "Touche. Anyway, first I'm thinking we get Yurio in a pink costume with lots of feathers. And then we get a flamenco track."

"I see where you're going with this and I don't like it."

"The ISU loves it when he does single-footed step sequences!"

"And they also probably like it when our Yuri doesn't look like an angry bird." Yuuri patted Victor's cheek. "You're an idiot. Goodnight."

Yuuri turned back over and settled into back into being the little spoon. Perhaps a minute passed before he turned back around, only to find Victor still staring pensively into the distance.

"What did you mean by masculine assholery?" Yuuri asked curiously.

"Flamingos are assholes. I say this through personal experience."

"Is there any chance that you might've had a nightmare about flamingos, Vitya?"

Victor was strangely silent for too long. "I please the fifth."

"Plead the fifth."

"I plead the fifth. Goodnight, Yuuri."