I Could Have Been Yours
"Is it Merlin again?"
"What?" Mordred gasped, surprised by Leon's sudden appearance.
That made Leon chuckle for a moment before giving him a small slap on the back.
"I think a blind man could see that you're always turning to him the same way a puppy would turn to its master, always waiting for praise or a kind word."
That made Mordred blush. He was no puppy, and certainly not Merlin's puppy.
"It's alright" Leon said, clearly much more comfortable than he was. "We all know that winning over Merlin is the best way to conquer the King – not that you need that. No, you seek Merlin's attention because you like him."
Mordred shrugged, ashamed of being too transparent.
"It's not like that…" he started.
"Gwaine was much the same" Leon confided, a understanding smile on his mouth.
"What?"
"He used to be like you – always walking around Merlin, waiting for some attention or some sign of… Honestly, I don't know what of – one hardly knows with Gwaine. Do you even know what you want from him?"
Mordred had to look down. As much as he tried, he couldn't control himself.
"I don't know what I've done to him – he doesn't trust me. Every time I try and be nice to him, he shuns me away. I just want him to see me as a friend."
"Merlin just… He's just so filled with Arthur, Arthur's needs and Arthur's wishes, that he sometimes forgets everyone else. It has always been like that." He smiled, sadly. "But that doesn't mean he doesn't see you as a friend."
Mordred nodded, only to make the other knight go away. Leon would never understand. No one would – except Merlin. And Merlin didn't want to.