A/N: This was going to be a part of my Tokotober one shots, but this kept growing. Please Enjoy and let me know what you think. Very funny
Get Laid
"There are only two rules for tonight," Hawks said as he finished buttoning the cuffs on his shirt. "One, don't talk to the Eagle. Two, don't associate with anyone with any robin features."
Tokoyami stared at his mentor as he buttoned his dark grey vest over his red shirt. He rolled his sleeves up to his elbows. Dark Shadow poked through the dark vest. "You look fancy. Are we going to a party?"
"I'm not sure," Tokoyami thought. "Hawks just told me to get dressed and meet him out here."
"You should ask," Dark Shadow insisted.
Tokoyami agreed. "Where are we going?" he asked Hawks.
"We are going to Get Laid," Hawks practically shouted.
Tokoyami paused mid-button. "What?"
"Fuck yeah!"
Hawks laughed. "Not like that. Well, we can be hopeful. No, it's a club."
Tokoyami's eyes widened. The echoing sounds of Iida's voice lecturing the entire class on the consistent need to properly represent U.A. "This doesn't sound like a place that someone with such heroic stature should be associating with."
Hawks turned to his pupil with an exasperated expression. "Look, Tokoyami. As a hero you are going to be representing a subgroup of people. Your goth thing is cute, but you are going to want to reach a larger audience. Why not look for the largest group? The birds!"
"So is this some sort of bird people only club?" Tokoyami asked.
Hawks just smirked and dragged Tokoyami to the window. "You will see. Now hold on! We are arriving in style." Hawks wrapped his arms around Tokoyami and soared into the night.
"I hate this form of travel," Tokoyami groaned in his head.
"Oh, come on. Don't be grumpy just because we are going out to have fun."
"What part of fun is a club, Dark Shadow?"
"It's dark. There is loud music. You can try to learn to dance."
"All of that sounds like a misuse of time."
"Come on, Fumikage. What if there is a cute girl? You are certainly not making any headway on your crush on Tsuyu."
Tokoyami rolled his eyes. "Do you always have to bring that up? Besides, we need to become heroes first. Relationships are trivial compared to the long goal of life."
Dark Shadow scoffed. "You can't just be lonely and brooding with just me. I need someone else to talk to as well."
"We are almost there!" Hawks called to Tokoyami. "Just follow my lead, and act cool."
The pair landed in the far side of the city. The streets were filled with a plethora of persons. Each individual was unique. There was something odd about this part of town. Tokoyami's eyes grew wide.
"Everyone has some sort of bird quirk." Tokoyami realized.
Hawks turned to Tokoyami and smiled when he saw his shocked expression. "Welcome to the Nest, Kid. Home of eighty percent of all the bird people. Everyone out here has something bird related. When you are here you don't stand out, you fit in.
"I had no idea this place existed," Tokoyami said.
Hawks smiled and placed an arm around the teen. "We are going to get you in touch with your people."
He escorted Tokoyami down the street. The young teen couldn't help but gawk at the flocks of people with variety of bird features. Even Dark Shadow was animated by the amount of other bird people that were out and about.
Hawks led them to a tall building where two men with vulture heads were standing in large suits. They were blocking a line of people, checking their I.D.s, looking through bags for contraband, and tying bright neon wristbands around patrons wrists.
"Hey, boys!" Hawks said, cutting the entire line and patting one of them on the shoulder.
"Hey, Hawks! Long time no see." The vulture eyed Tokoyami. "Is he with you?"
"You bet! He's one of my new little sidekicks." Hawks placed an arm around Tokoyami.
The bouncer leaned in close to Hawks. "Is he old enough?"
"Does it really matter?" Hawks asked with a smirk. "C'mon. He's with me." The pro hero grabbed the teen by the wrist and extended it towards the bouncer. The vulture snorted, rolled his eyes, and quickly placed a band around Tokoyami's wrist before Hawks.
Tokoyami stared at the band. In bold letters it read 20 and Up. Tokoyami gulped, as he felt Dark Shadow bounce inside him. "Hawks is sneaking you in somewhere!"
"But where is it that we are going that requires me to be at least twenty?" Tokoyami thought to Dark Shadow.
The spirit scoffed at his worry. "Why would Hawks lead you down the wrong path? He's clearly trying to teach how to be social!"
"He is the number two hero. People enjoy his charisma. Perhaps this is how he maintains it." Tokoyami thought about his hypothesis as he followed Hawks into the building. The pounding base vibrated through Tokoyami's chest. A sinking feeling fell through his stomach. He had never been in a club before.
Hawks must have noticed his expression. He pulled Tokoyami close to him. "Tokoyami, you need to just relax. We are here to have fun. I just want you to mingle and get to know your other birds."
Tokoyami nodded and they walked down the stairs. Tokoyami began to imagine what he would be seeing. Perhaps a large floor packed with people dancing? Maybe there would be a place to sit? He was trying to think about scenes from the movies Mina had forced the entire class to watch. Little did he know how unprepared he would be for this event.
Hawks and Tokoyami reached a large velvet door. A nicely dressed man with black penguin skin covering his hands like gloves bowed. "Mr. Hawks. It is wonderful to see you again. Welcome to Get Laid."
The door opened, and Tokoyami's jaw dropped. Lights were flashing all over in a variety of colors. The doorway led straight into a large room. Stairs led down to a lower area where plush chairs and cushions surrounded tables with poles. They were on the upper balcony area, which was lined with chairs. A large stage was against the back wall. Several dancers in a variety of costumes were moving on the stage under large spotlights. Scantily dressed waiters walked around in speedos and bow ties. The most eye catching thing where the male men with Parrot feather wings and tails dancing in cages hanging from the ceiling.
Dark Shadow spoke to Tokoyami before Tokoyami could figure out how to react. "Did Hawks take us to a gay bird club?"
"Come on!" Hawks motioned to Tokoyami down the stairs. "I have someone I want you to meet."
"I am afraid of who this person may be," Tokoyami said to Dark Shadow as he followed Hawks.
Hawks dragged the teen down the stairs. "Hey! Peon!" Hawks shouted towards a table. "Here is the kid!"
A tall, muscular man wearing with dark blue hair turned. He wear a bright blue speedo with gems covering the front. Tokoyami's eyes widened with fear as the man rushed over to him and grabbed Tokoyami's face and planted a passionate kiss on his beak.
"Shit!" Dark Shadow said. "That was your first kiss."
"Oh, Hawks! He's even more divine than you described! He's," a giant blue peacock tail unfolded from the man's back, "FABULOUS!"
Hawks laughed. "Yes, he's just great!"
"You must come join me at my table!" The peacock grabbed Tokoyami by the hand and dragged him to a table. Hawks followed. The table had a round loveseat booth circling it. At the table there was a well built man with large, bright yellow eyes and a hooked nose. There was also a man with a bright white cockatoo feathers instead of hair. The man's feathers stood up tall in the front and the fell long feathers draped over his shoulders.
They both squealed when they saw Tokoyami. "Who is this cutie?" Asked the cockatoo man.
"Sit him between us," the yellow eyed man said patting the seat next to him. "I want to get an up close look at this one."
"Please no," Tokoyami thought as he was dragged to the table.
Peon pushed Tokoyami in the booth first, pressing him right up against the yellow eyed man. "I'm Fal," the falcon said. He pointed to the person beside him. "This is Titi."
"Hello," Titi said reaching to grab Tokoyami's hand.
Tokoyami was speechless. This was way too close to such strange, half naked men. "What do I do?"
"Just introduce yourself," Dark Shadow thought. "They seem friendly."
"Need I remind you that we are underage. These are adult men!"
"Just say hi," Dark Shadow said. "You aren't in any position to not."
"I'm Tokoyami," Tokoyami said as the cockatoo took his hand. Titi kissed the teen's knuckles.
Tokoyami was so lost for words that all he could was react to the awkward situation. All the feather's on the back of his head ruffled as he was gingerly kissed on the hand. The three bird men laughed.
"How cute, you made him ruffle," Fal said.
"Ruffles seems like a good name for him," Titi winked.
Peon ran his fingers through the back of Tokoyami's head. "Oh you're just so adorable! I could preen you all day. Hawks, how did you get such an adorable intern?"
"I'm just lucky," Hawks said, sitting on the other side of Peon. "Hey, you all want any drinks? I'm a little thirsty. And since you all are just so kind to my intern, this first round is on me."
"Oh, such a gentleman," Titi swooned.
"You normally don't offer unless you're up to something," Fal said with a wink.
Hawks shrugged. "What can I say? I'm feeling generous."
"Get us something as sweet as ruffles," Peon said wrapping his arms around Tokoyami.
"I'm on it." Hawks walked away leaving Tokoyami alone with three strangers.
Fal laid his elbow on the table and rested his chin on his fist. "Tell us, Ruffles, is Hawks treating you right?"
"Wait what?" Both Tokoyami and Dark Shadow said at the same time.
"You can trust us," Peon said, pulling Tokoyami into his bare chest. "We know how much work he makes all his interns do. You're always picking up after him as he just flies ahead into more exciting action. Then he makes snarky jokes around you. You are awfully quiet. We just want to know, is he really being a good Mentor to you?"
"Phew, that's what they mean," Tokoyami thought. He cleared his throat. "Hawks is an excellent mentor. He has helped me see my strengths and improve upon them. I can say I have only improved under his tutelage."
"Awe! Tokoyami, I didn't know you felt that way."
Tokoyami looked up to see Hawks sitting back in his seat. There was a genuine soft look on his face. He was surprised to see his mentor's look. Hawks was smiling, but his eyes were glossed with melancholy.
"Oh, Ruffles! You made Hawks emotional!" Titi teased.
Lucky for Hawks, a Toucan billed man arrived with a tray of five drinks. Each trunk was brite green. There was an apple slice garnish on each drink. "Enjoy," the waiter said with a wink as he placed one of the glasses infringed of Tokoyami.
"What did you get us?" Fal asked, taking a sip.
"It's something Apple flavored," Hawks explained. "Kid likes apples, so I thought that we could all enjoy this."
"Okay, maybe Hawks is not the best influence," Dark Shadow said to Tokoyami.
"Cheers!" Peón said, and the group clinked their glasses. Everyone except Tokoyami took a drink.
"What's wrong, Ruffles?" Titi asked.
"I just didn't expect there to be drinking," Tokoyami said.
Titi got a shocked look before staring at Hawks. "You didn't tell him where you were taking him, did you?"
"No wonder he is quiet. He didn't expect all of this," Titi coed.
Fal started to eye Tokoyami up and down. "You seem young. How old are you?" He asked.
Before Tokoyami could respond, a tall, well built man with flamingo legs appeared before them. He was wearing a pair of short suspenders, a black vest, and knee high boots. "Hey, boys," he said. "I heard it was somebody's birthday?"
Tokoyami sank as far down as he could into the seat. He looked to Hawks, who was wearing a giant smile, and he knew what Hawks had done.
Fal's face lit up. "Oh my goodness! What a sweet birthday surprise! Hawks, you devil! We could have helped you!
"Didn't you?" Hawks said.
"Here's your birthday boy!" Peon patted Tokoyami on the back.
Tokoyami jumped. He was taking out his phone as secretly as possible. "I don't think I can get out of this alone. I need help."
Tokoyami felt a bare foot push up under his beak. "The show is up here," the dancer said. They were standing on the table on one leg while the other pushed against the teens face. Their shoes were now in Hawks' hands.
"Dark Shadow," Tokoyami thought.
"I'm finishing the text don't worry. Someone will come. Why did Hawks say it was your birthday?"
The dancer spun on their one leg before dropping to their knees facing the other way. The dancers butt twerked in beat with the music. It slowly moved closer and closer to Tokoyami.
This is not what Tokoyami wanted. If he had been interested in this sort of thing, maybe… in a few years. This was the sort of event Shoji would enjoy. Not Tokoyami. He squeezed his eyes shut as the man's ass pushed against his body. The others at his table whooped and cheered.
"Don't think the fun stops here," the dancer said flirtatiously. He whistled and a group of large, men with swan heads and wings appeared behind the dancer. "You're coming with us."
Hawks pushed Tokoyami's drink towards him. "You really should drink this before you go."
Tokoyami stared at the green beverage. Dark Shadow could hear the teens anxiety ringing in his ears. "It's the only smart thing Hawks has suggested tonight."
Tokoyami grabbed the drink and chugged it. He hoped it would kick in soon. All the dancers cheered, and the group of swan men grabbed him and carried him off the front of the club on the large stage.
The music began to play at a louder and more rapid pace. Tokoyami did not like where this was going. "I can't put up with much more," he told Dark Shadow.
"Alrighty!" A large duck billed DJ stood off to the side. We were informed that there was a birthday boy in the house! We at Get Laid want to make sure your night is one to remember.
As the music started, the group of swan men began dancing in sync around Tokoyami. Somehow, a chair made its way up on stage. Tokoyami was sat down in it, and one at a time each white feathered man presented a mating dance to him. The moves were impressive, but the context disturbing. Tokoyami and Dark Shadow both were frozen as the group of men flaunted their physiques.
After what felt like an eternity, all the swan men stood in a line and the DJ called out. "Alright! As your present from all of us at Get Laid, you get to spend seven minutes in heaven with anyone one of our fine dancers!
Tokoyami's head shot towards Hawks. Hawks, too, looked extremely concerned.
"Let's get some of the crowds opinion." The DJ decided. He placed a spot light on a single dancer. "Who thinks it should be this fine man?"
Tokoyami looked out into the crowd. Way off in the back he saw a large man with eagle head. The eagle stared back at him. He was surrounded by several red feathered men.
"What will it be?" The DJ walked up to Tokoyami. He placed the microphone up to the teens mouth. Tokoyami stared into the crowd. His mind suddenly became fuzzy, and a warm shil rushed down Tokoyami's spine.
"None. I want none of this."
The crowd gasped. The DJ stuttered. "You mean all of them, right? You have to choose one. Eagle is watching."
"I don't want any of this. I didn't choose to come here. I was brought here." Tokoyami stared at Hawks. "Are you happy, Hawks? Am I entertaining you enough?" Tokoyami jumped off the stage and began to walk away. He stumbled, as he made his way past the tables.
Hawks walked up to Tokoyami and tried to grab his arm. "We need to leave."
Tokoyami pulled his arm away from Hawks. "Oh, now we need to leave. Fuck off! I'll find my own way back."
"Tokoyami, I'm being serious. What you did I definitely going to upset the eagle." Hawks began to nervously look around.
"What I did?" Tokoyami stopped and pushed Hawks in the chest. "This is all your doing."
Tokoyami stormed off. Dark Shadow poked it's self out of Tokoyami back. He flipped Hawks the bird before retreating back into his host.
Hawks took a few steps to follow but something grabbed his shoulder. Hawks turned to see three red breasted men standing behind him. They were each holding a wooden club. "You have made a mockery of this club for the last time," the front most one said.
"God damnit. I'll deal with you quickly, then i will find the kid." Haks pulled out two large feathers and they hardened into sword like states. All three robins gulped.
Tokoyami stumbled up the darkened stairs. Dark Shadow caught the teen as he fell and prevented him from hitting the ground. "Fumikage, perhaps you should sit? I think that drink is starting to affect you."
"You are right," Tokoyami sighed. He sat down on on the stairs and leaned against the railing. The room began to spin. Colors were popping all around the room. Dots speckled across hi vision. "I think I need to lie down, Dark Shadow."
"Fumikage! What's going on!"
As the room continued to spin a brite blue bulge came towards Tokoyami. "There you are, Ruffles"
Tokoyami felt himself be pulled up to his feet. The blue person next to him was chuckling. "Man, that absinthe really got to you. Let's go sit down, and I will get you some water."
Dark Shadow sighed from with in Tokoyami. "Peacock is probably the best person we've met tonight."
For a Friday evening at the U.A. dorms, it was a rather quiet night. A few students were out on their internships, but those who remained in the dorms had agreed to get together. Kirishima had brought "the greatest movie ever," and the remainder of class 1-A had spent the night watching.
The movie was an emotional roller coaster. Everyone, including Bakugou and Todoroki, shed a tear by the end of the movie. As the credits rolled, the group controlled each other.
"That dog," Bakugou whispered.
"I know! I told you it was super intense," Kirishima said.
"Great choice in movie, Kirishima," Iida commended.
"Um, guys," Everyone turned to Tsuyu, who was looking at her phone. "I think something bad happened to Tokoyami."
"Shouldn't he be on his internship?" Momo said.
Each member of the class pulled out their phone. All reacted to the text that they saw.
Tokoyami: Help! They have me and I can't escape!
"Is it villains?" Iida asked.
"Poor Tokoyami!" cried Mina. "This was sent two hours ago!"
"Did anyone check out the location he sent?" Shoji asked.
"Yes," said Jiro. "It is a club."
"It's a gay club," Mineta stated. Everyone turned their eyes to Mineta. The purple balled boy was scrolling on his phone. "I went to their website. Its for gay birds."
"Is Tokoyami gay?" Sero asked.
"Why else would he be at a gay club, idiot?" spat Bakugou.
"Tokoyami isn't gay," Shoji said. "He likes Tsu."
"Shoji!" Koda yelled.
Tsuyu blushed. "Ribbit. This is awkward."
"Guys, you're missing the point," said Midoriya. "Tokoyami is in danger. He and Hawks could have been responding to fight over there!"
"And he called for backup and none of us saw," Kaminari muttered.
All the students stood at once. "We need Aizawa sensei!"
Tokoyami was quite grateful for the water. Peon had proven themselves to be quite the caring individual. "You need to stay awake, Ruffles, honey," the peacock said. "Hawks will come soon to take you home."
"I don't want to go back with that ass," Tokoyami slurred.
"Oh, come on, surely you don't mean that."
Tokoyami nodded his head. "I do. I really do. He can be such a great teacher, but he is an ass. Why did he bring me here?"
"He probably wanted you to know it's okay to be a bird and gay," Peon said.
"But I'm not gay," Tokoyami practically shouted. "If Hawks wanted to know my sexuality he could have just asked."
"Oh my," Peon gasped. "No wonder you were so uncomfortable."
"I was really excited to see so many other birds," Tokoyami sighed. "I guess this what happens when you just follow Hawks."
"You can't always be follower. You need to lead yourself first."
"Wise words, Peon," Tokoyami said and he took a drink of water.
Hawks flew up the stairs and straight to Peon and Tokoyami. "There you are, kid!"
"Oh, now you are concerned." Tokoyami rolled his eyes.
"Hawks, did you just assume Ruffles' sexuality?" Peon asked.
"No," Hawks rubbed the back of his neck. "He's always talking about some frog chick or treat Shoji guy. I just wanted him to come meet other birds."
"So you take him here," a voice from behind Hawks said.
Hawks turned around to reveal Aizawa. Tokoyami sighed with relief. "Aizawa sensei!"
Aizawa looked at Tokoyami. "What the hell happened?"
"Ruffles here had a rough night," Peon responded.
"I just want to go back to the dorms and forget tonight," Tokoyami said staring at the ground.
Aizawa's hair began to float. He tossed his restraint scarf at Hawks and pulled him in close. "You dragged one of my students to an adult club and you got him drunk! What else did you do?"
"I had my reasons, I swear!" Hawks gave Aizawa a cheesy smile.
"How the hell am I supposed to trust my students to heroes when the number two hero pulls shit like this?"
"Exactly," Hawks responds cooly. "Perhaps you will need to meet with all the heroes that offer your students internships beforehand. You may even need to do some sort of internal processing or screening before allowing your students to go with such an irresponsible adult."
Aizawa released his restraints and stared at Hawks. "Are you fucking kidding me?"
"What? What do I have to kid about?"
Aizawa gritted his teeth. "You could have just called if you thought something was up."
"But would I have gotten the results?" Hawks smiled and began to walk out the door. "See you later, Tokoyami."
Aizawa released an exasperated sigh before grabbing ahold of Tokoyami's arm. "Come on, Tokoyami. Let's get you back to the dorms. You're going to need some space to recuperate from this."
"Goodbye, Ruffles!" Peon waved goodbye.
Dark Shadow poked out of Tokoyami's back. "Goodbye Peacock!"