Never Let Me Go
The sky above burst open. An explosion of water fell to the earth from the dull clouds above in the form of tiny droplets. As it fell, it covered everything in its path, no corner of Shizume City was left dry. Certainly not the open-aired football stadium just outside the city. The pitch was left drenched and water-logged to the point where it resembled a bog more that it did a football pitch. The grey sky that opened up reflected the mood in the stadium as the two boys trudged through the muck, back towards the subway, in complete silence. They were up to their ankles in mud and on more than one occasion they had to stop in order to tug their feet out of the sinking ground. Although the conversation had ended on a lighter note than was expected, it very quickly deflated when reality sunk in for Shiro.
Cold, wet and shivering, Kuroh refused to stand under the umbrella, insisting that the rain was "cleansing for the soul", in the words of Master Ichigen. His white shirt clung wrinkled to his chest and his lose hair was plastered to his face. His jacket hung loosely on his shoulders, rain water dripping off the cuffs and collar. His pants were covered in mud to his mid-calf, just like the other boy. He furrowed his eyebrows and kept his head down against the wind as the walked down the sidewalk. However, his poor physical condition was nothing compared to his companion's mental state.
Shiro, at a first glance, was in much better condition than his elder. Under his umbrella he remained almost completely dry from the waist up. His hair was the same mop of tousled white hair, not at all affected by the extreme weather conditions. His uniform was its usual slightly messy state, yet dry and keeping him warm. The only fault that could be seen was the frown on his usually cheerful face.
Everything, all of his doubts and worries, they had all been confirmed. Although over the past few days he had the nagging feeling that something was not quite right, that every time he protested his innocence he felt as if he was lying, having it clarified to him was worse than he could have imagined. At least before he had something to cling on to. Now he knew for certain. He was not Isana Yashiro. He was not a typical 17 year-old student. He was not plain and boring and normal. He was someone else entirely. Someone with no family, no friends. He could be anyone. Kuroh was right - he had been lying, though he hadn't even known it. He was truly alone in the world. And although Kuroh had promised him to not let the final curtain fall just yet, Shiro had never felt so lonely.
The two boys climbed the steps onto the subway without uttering a word. Their carriage was completely deserted, a rare occurrence in the busy Shizume City. Shiro slowly bent to sit on the empty bench, dropping his umbrella at his feet. Kuroh, forever being the awkward one, decided to stand, holding onto one of the handles suspended from the ceiling of the carriage, facing out towards the window behind Shiro's back. He frowned down at the young boy as he stared right infront of him, his face a mask of stone. He showed no emotion, yet another rare occurrence in Shizume City. Kuroh was always able to read this boy's face like a book. He seemed unable to cover up his emotions, be they good or bad. This new Shiro, serious Shiro, was more than disturbing. It was unnatural.
Neither said anything during the entire trip home. Shiro seemed too consumed with his inner thoughts to make his usual effort for light conversation. Kuroh was unable to think of anything to say to cheer him up. He doubted he would get a response anyway, no matter what he said. So by the time Kuroh did manage to choke out a few words when they returned to the dorm room, they came out low a croaked from lack of use. "Would you prefer sushi or hot-pot for dinner?" As expected there was no response. The boy merely walked straight to the bathroom, picking up a towel from the back of a chair as he went. The door locked behind him.
With a sigh Kuroh rummaged through his bag to find some clothes to change into. He quickly stripped off, throwing his drenched garments into the basket in the kitchen before climbing into his fresh clothes. He reached into Shrio's wardrobe to get him some dry clothes before carefully folding and placing them onto his bed. Squeezing out the rainwater from his ponytail, he headed back to the kitchen to pop his apron over his head. He took a moment to examine the contents of the cupboards before setting off to work. After a moment he heard the sound of running water from next door, which continued for another fifteen minutes as he prepared their meal. Finally, after forty minutes, the bathroom door swung open just as the timer on the oven beeped.
Shiro emerged with the same blank expression on his face and only a towel wrapped loosely around his waist. He had another in his hand, slowly drying his tangled hair. "The hot-pot is nearly ready, give me a mome-" Kuroh cut his sentence short when he poked his head around the kitchen door, taking in the image of the younger man standing half naked in the middle of the room. He caught himself, averted his eyes as he felt red heat crawl up his neck to rest on his cheeks. "I- I lay out some of your clothes on your bed. I didn't think you would mind..." He took a deep breath, making his best attempt at cooling down his cheeks. Shiro glanced over to the neatly folded pile of clothes on his bed and to Kuroh's surprise he said quietly "Thanks." Again, Kuroh's cheeks flushed a pale pink colour.
He retreated back to the kitchen, avoiding the awkwardness of being in the same room as his companion while he got changed. He served up their meal with pristine presentation, careful to keep some for Neko when she would return from who knows where she was. Shiro was just tugging a white shirt over his head as Kuroh came in with their food. He got a quick glimpse of a thin band of the pale flesh of his abdomen. He cleared his throat and placed the bowls on the table. The two boys sat cross-legged on the floor facing one another, bowing their heads before starting to eat. About halfway through his bowl, Kuroh looked up to see that Shiro had barely touched his meal, merely pushing chunks of pork from one side to the other. The older boy sighed put down his spoon, staring across the table at Shiro, who's face was covered by his mop of white hair.
"Do you intend on remaining silent for the rest of the evening or are you going to tell me what is wrong?" He furrowed his eyebrows, determined to get an answer from the other boy. If he had to be harsh about it, then so be it. But what Shiro did next nearly knocked him off his feet. He lifted his head, his hair falling back to reveal his tear-streamed face. Shiro's lip quivered as more fat tears rolled down his cheeks. The boy looked up at Kuroh with such sorrow in his eyes that he himself felt his own tearing up just at the sight of him. He took a shaky breath, the first genuine noise he had made since they arrived home, looking down in shame. "I'm sorry, Kuro-san. I know I shouldn't cry and I know it makes you uncomfortable but..." He lifted his gaze up from the floor to see the other man watching him from across the table, eyebrows knitted together in what looked like mild irritation. Shiro brushed the tears from his cheeks hastily and tried to calm himself down. The last thing he needed was to scare off the only person left in the world who he had left. "I'm fine, just a long day is all. Don't mind m-" he was cut off when the taller man stood up and grabbed him by the shoulders, led him over to his bed and pushed him down onto it in a sitting position. He sat down next to Shiro and placed a hand gently on his shoulder. "Talk to me, Isana Yashiro," he said quietly in a soothing voice.
Shiro blinked in confusion, not at all expecting this reaction from the usually deadpan warrior. His eyes met with those of his pale comerade as his own began to fill with tears yet again. Maybe it was this unusual gesture, the simple act of someone sitting with him, ready to listen to him, was what made Shiro break down. He hung his head in his hands, not even bothering to try to stop the hot tears streaking down his face.
"I don't know what to do, Kuro. I thought that everything was going to be alright. I thought I had proven my innocence to you and that, for some reason, I was just being framed. I thought we were going to be able to put this behind us, let the Red and Blue Clansmen find who really killed Totsuka. But now... I don't even know. I'm not who I thought I was. I'm not Isana Yashiro and there's a good chance I'm not innocent. Kuroh, I could have killed a man, and not even know it! And I know this sounds selfish but... Kuroh I have no one. I have no family, all of my so-called friends don't remember me, my whole life these past few weeks have been a sham and I'm just... just so scared of being alone."
His shoulders shook uncontrollably as he wept, his eyes never seeming to stop producing tears. He heard Kuroh shush him softly and felt an arm wrap around his shoulders, drawing him closer to the other man. He lay his head on his chest, drawing his legs up towards himself and allowed Kuroh to rock him gently back and forth. Neither of them seemed to take any notice of the strange situation they were in, both merely acted on instinct. When Kuroh saw Shiro break down it pulled on his heartstrings and all he wanted to do was make his pain go away. He always strived to be composed and unemotional on the outside, it was the best way of protecting one's self. But on very rare occasions he would allow himself the let down the wall he had up, for only a few choice people. Before he thought he could only be so open with his late Master. But now it seemed that this young boy had begun to fill the space that Ichigen's death had left empty. He could relate to Shiro's situation, the feeling of being completely alone, more than he would ever know.
Kuroh lay his hand on Shiro's head, stroking his hair slowly in an effort to soothe him. It seemed to be working, as Shiro's sobs subsided and turned to sniffles after a few minutes of rocking and shushing. Kuroh placed his thumb and index finger on his chin and pulled his head up to look him in the eye. "Isana Yashiro. I meant what I said earlier this evening. It is my duty to judge you, and I intend on doing so. But I will not leave your side until I am certain of who you are. We will figure this out." He wiped away the tears on his cheek as Shiro clung to his shirt, listening intently. "Together." Shiro inhaled sharply, air warm from Kuroh's breath. Their eyes met and only then did either finally realise how intimate their current position was. They were sitting on a bed, Shiro curled up on Kuroh's lap, his hand twisted into his shirt and his head resting on his chest while the older man rocked him gently, stroking his cheek. The two began to blush, quickly looking away from one another. Shiro drew back, chuckling awkwardly to himself while scratching the back of his head. Seeing the look on Kuroh's face, and not wanting to make him uncomfortable, Shiro regretfully made to withdraw from him completely. He was stopped by a hand gripping his wrist, pulling him back to where he had been.
"Kuroh?" He looked at the raven with mild confusion. Kuroh took a deep breath, not saying anything for a moment before lifting his gaze to meet Shiro's eyes. "I would like to let you know that for as long as I am here, you will never be alone." Shiro blinked at him, his eyes tired and stinging from the crying. He sat back down on Kuroh's lap and lifted a tentative hand to his face. He carefully let his fingertips run across his smooth skin, slowly enough to allow the older man pull back if he wished. He didn't. He traced the line of his jaw, the bridge of his nose, finally his lips. Kuroh's eyes closed while he relished at the feel of Shiro's touch. He soaked up the attention his face was getting and when he felt fingertips on his lips he opened his eyes again. They were met with amber orbs mere inches from his face. He reached up to place a hand at the back of Shiro's head, another settling on his hip. He wasn't entirely sure of what he was doing but for once he let his mind shut off and did what felt right.
He pulled Shiro's face closer to his and gently pressed his lips to those of the white-haired boy, the lightest and most simple of kisses. The two remained very still, both terrified of making a wrong move and ruining the whole moment. Neither had any experience in romance department and both were shy about the new experience. Shiro, feeling brave, placed his hand on Kuroh's chest where he could feel his heartbeat hammering, just like his own. The two pulled apart, cheeks a faint pink colour. Kuroh looked down, and began "I-I apologise.. I-" His sentence was smothered by a pair of lips, pressed harder now than the last time. There was a brief pause, not kknowing exactly what to do next. Then, Shiro knotted his hand into his companion's long hair, pulling his face closer to his. Kuroh responded by wrapping his arms around Shiro's waist, dragging him completely onto his lap as he deepened their kiss. The two fought hard to gain dominence over the other, tongues tying and teeth bashing. In the end Kuroh won - he decided to be adventurous and nibbled Shiro's lips softly, licking and tugging it slightly before pulling back.
He wanted to comfort Shiro. He wanted to show him that he was not alone and that someone out there did care about him. He wanted to show him how much he wanted, needed him and it was now his mission to make the boy feel loved. They sat up, Shiro still in Kuroh's lap with his legs wrapped around his waist, the two clinging on to one another for dear life. Shiro pushed the ebony hair back from the raven's face, staring openly at him. "You really are beautiful, Kuro-kun," he whispered while the other man merely smiled. He placed his hands on Shiro's shoulders and gently pushed him down onto the bed. Shiro's eyes widened as Kuroh hovered over him, his ponytail and strands of loose hair tickling his face. He leaned down and placed feather-light kissed along his jaw line, his hand reaching under his shirt and beginning to explore his chest. Shiro's back arched up to the touch, trying to get more contact. He gasped as Kuroh became more rough, sucking at his neck and nibbling on it, leaving a mark before kissing away the slight throb of pain. Shiro groaned, toes curling at the excitement of all of these new sensations.
After a few moments Shiro grew impatient, tugging Kuroh's hair to remove his lips from his neck, only to devour them again with his own. It was his turn to bite the Black Dog, his tongue exploring the other man's mouth while he made a low, growling noise in the back of his throat. As he pulled away, panting, Kuroh made his most bold and dangerous move yet. He sat back on his heels, still straddling Shiro's hips and slowly began to remove his jacket, all the while staring down into those amber eyes. Shiro began to blush, yet spurred on my his partner's enthusiasm he reached up to undo his messy tie and the buttons of his shirt. Kuroh shrugged his shirt off his shoulders and threw it in a heap in the corner of the room. Shiro sat up, hands running over the velvety smooth skin of his chest. It was perfect, not too toned but flat and firm. He looked up into those silver eyes as he bent forward to press a soft kiss to his collarbone. Kuroh rested his hand on the small of Shiro's back, eyes closing yet again while he kissed, licked and nibbled at his flesh. Shiro made his way down to his abdomen, where he paused for a moment, not sure what to do next. He did what he thought was a logical move and undid the button and zipper of his partner's pants. Kuroh shrugged them off and they soon joined his other clothes on the floor. He made quick work of Shiro's shirt and cotton pants, repeating Shiro's earlier motions himself. He ran his hands over his partner's milky-white chest, nibbling softly at his earlobe. He felt Shiro's thigh rise up between his legs as he bit down hard on his collarbone. Both let out a gasp of surprise, then looking up to meet eachother's gaze. A silent message passed between them and they nodded at one another, pulses racing in their ears. After giving their silent consent, Kuroh leaned down to capture Shiro's lips in his.
...
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...
Still trembling, Shiro clung to Kuroh's chest as the raven flopped down onto the matress, limbs weak and wobbly. He brushed back the damp white hair from the younger man's face and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. Shiro reached down to pull the blanket to cover them before resting his head on the other man's shoulder, turning his head to place lazy kisses on it. The two lay like that, arms and legs tangled, while trying to steady their breathing. After a few minuites, Kuroh turned his head to look down at the boy. "I love you," he whispered, his thumb stroking his arm. Shiro's head jerked upwards, a pink glow on his cheeks. He smiled sheepishly and whispered back, "I love you, too." They smiled at one another, Kuroh kissed the mop of messy hair by his side before the two settled down to sleep, the storm continuing outside the window. But none of that mattered. No matter what happened now, no matter what new clues they discovered, Shiro and Kuroh were in it together. Shiro would never have to worry about being alone again.
But for that night, Kuroh made sure he held onto his lover just that little bit tighter.
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Author's Note: Wow guys! Thank you so much for reading, reviewing and favouriting my other stories. You don't know how much that means to me. You're all awesome! This was my first attempt at a semi-lemon (I'm sorry, some of you wanted a full lemon but I'm not quite ready for that yet :D Maybe the next one...? :D ) Anyway I hope you liked it, please review and stuff! Feel free to send me prompts for other Kuroh/Shiro stories, I'll do my best! I love you all 3