Intro:: Well believe it or not this was a dream Tubs had and we decided to share. Yes, she really is that obsessed.
Summary: One-shot. James takes Sirius on a day trip to London, but he can't stop buying useless things (like six toasters and a box of Pritt Sticks). An even bigger problem arises when he discovers matches... This story is a load of rubbish, but it's really funny and has proper grammer.
Sirius' Trip To London
James decided to take Sirius to Muggle London for the day. Three hours in he was deeply regretting it as they passed yet another shop and Sirius exclaimed
"Wow! Look at all the cool things in the window! Can we go in?"
James sighed, "Not again…why this one too? We've already been in the last four, or was it five?"
"Who cares!! It's got flashing things!"
Nevertheless they entered the shop with James muttering "Flashing things… you're a wizard for goodness sake."
They went upstairs and Sirius picked up a box of matches.
"Wow," he breathed. "What do THESE do?"
James glanced over. "They're just common matches Sirius. Put them down."
Sirius continues to turn over the matchbox, examining it closely.
"Fine, I'll go and wait outside. Just don't buy anything else. You have enough useless stuff."
"Like what?"
"Well, six toasters, a vacuum, a blue frying pan and a box of Pritt Sticks that you will NEVER use…"
Sirius looked away as James made his way back downstairs to wait outside.
Half an hour later, Sirius emerged from the shop with a guilty face.
"What kept you?" exclaimed James as they set off down the street.
"Nothing, just looking…"
They made it along the rest of the street with Sirius being unusually quiet. James was about to ask why when he caught an unusual smell in the air.
"Sirius…" he began slowly. "Do you smell something burning?"
Sirius looked up quickly, "No."
"No really. Do you think something's on fire?"
"Well," said Sirius, bringing the rear of his shirt round into view. "It might be my shirt."
Sure enough, bright hot flames were licking his back. James jumped back in alarm.
"Sirius, you're on FIRE!!"
"Ohh, is it REAL fire? I thought it might be special muggle fire."
With a great sigh of exasperation, James grabbed him and pulled him down the nearest alleyway, conjured up a water spell and extinguished the flames.
"Now don't do anything like that again!"
But, only ten paces down the road James turned to him again.
"Sirius…" he began, threateningly.
"I- I don't know how it happened…"Sirius said sheepishly as he pulled round the once again alight shirt.
Once more James dragged him down the alleyway and put out the fire.
"Now, Sirius. What did you do?" James demanded, hands on hips.
Sirius calmly took a match from the box he produced from his pocket, swiped it against the side and set it against his now badly singed shirt.
"That's all!" he cried. "I swear!"
James was staring at him with a look of sheer incredulity on his face. His jaw moved silently as words failed him. When he regained control of his voice he hurriedly extinguished Sirius once more and arched him back into the street.
"Give me the matches," he demanded.
Reluctantly, Sirius handed them over.
"Now I want no more of this setting yourself on fire, do you hear?"
Just then, from across the street rushed a short girl with green and yellow hair.
"Excuse me!" she exclaimed breathlessly. "But I've been watching you and I have to ask…why on EARTH do you keep setting yourself on fire?!"
Sirius and James glanced at each other.
"Umm," James began (while conjuring up a bottle of water), and Sirius finished for him-
"It's my first time in London!"
Heather: Yay! Please review, even if it's just "I loved it" or "I printed out this story to line my cat's litter tray" We want to know!
Tubs: hi! so did you enjoy?? this really was my dream, with small additions, ie blue frying pan, i hope you found it as funny as Orlin,
Orlin: review please hmm yes, i didnt habve much toi do with this fict becoz heather and tubs are mad at my awful writiung skills so please review its the least i casn do fore them is to sucure reviews (my english isnt that bad is it now?)