Choking On Your Alibis
It's never really easy, is it?
Author's Note: Eh. Um, it's just something I wrote down. I don't even know why. Read and review anyway, please. x (I'm going to be British someday. Anyway, continuing on...)
It started with the fire escape. Their fire escape.
It's never easy hiding a secret. Especially when the secret you want to tell is the biggest secret you could possibly ever have and the one person you want to tell it to, you can't, because you're afraid to say it. And you're afraid of what they'll say.
It's funny how life works sometimes.
Once upon a time, Sam and Freddie were just...them. Sam and Freddie. They bickered, they fought, they made threats, made bets, and no regrets. And somewhere along the way, they stopped, looked, and reflected. This wasn't right. There had to be a reason for why their relationship had to be the way it was.
Sam, who was far too proud to even hint she had the slightest soft spot for Freddie, was the one who suggested they should share their first kisses with each other that night. It was also Sam who had basically told the whole world that Freddie had never kissed a girl. Life is funny that way.
Freddie, ever the oh-so-practical one, agreed. But it was to "get it over with," not because he had feelings for Sam, but because he would feel a lot better once it happened and he would never have to worry about it again.
They were sitting on the fire escape. Fourteen, inexperienced. He really had never kissed a girl before. And then he did. The girl was Sam.
~x~
Then there was the breezeway. Their breezeway. With all the hesitations and complications, Sam Puckett was a mess...an emotionally wrecked mess.
She was in love.
Not that she said it to anyone. She wasn't one to express her feelings openly, especially something like being in love with someone.
It was Freddie who had confronted her about her feelings. He was the one who said "You never know what might happen if you don't-"
That's when Sam initiated their second kiss. Grabbing him by the shoulders, she closed her eyes, and didn't look back as she impulsively kissed him, shocking Freddie and causing emotion after emotion to go through his mind.
Then Sam lost hers.
~x~
Sam thought checking herself into a mental institution might solve everything. She avoided Freddie after the breezeway kiss. She even avoided Carly, her best friend. She avoided thinking and feeling and even more thinking by throwing herself into a room and focusing on the most simplest thing, "finger painting."
"Can we talk about the kiss?" Freddie asked, once Carly had left the room upon their arrival and finally finding her.
No.
"I hate you," is all she said. She was supposed to. It was the only thing she allowed herself to do when it came to Freddie. She was not supposed to have feelings for him, nor be love in him. But here she was, and he knew, so there was no point in denying it anymore.
"Then why'd you kiss me?" he asked confusedly.
"Because...I like you." It was out. More pronounced this time.
"So you hate me...and you like me?"
Better believe it, Benson.
...
"It's important how Sam feels," Freddie said to the camera much later, while in the middle of iCarly. At the mental institution, not their regular choice of venue. "But how I feel's important too."
The iCarly trio had heard the thoughts of their fans who had wanted Sam and Freddie to be together, and it was no doubt that their fans cared about the couple (-to-be).
That's all he needs. Ammunition to embarrass me on the internet, for the world to see.
But he didn't embarrass her. Instead, he went straight up to her, pulled her close, and kissed her for the world (and the patients) to see. He wants me...ME. What seemed like forever only lasted a minute as he opened his eyes and pulled away, his hands still on her waist.
"You mean that?" she simply asked.
He just nodded, smiled, and said, "Mm-hmm."
Their mental institution. Maybe they were both insane.
She liked the sound of that.
~x~
FIN