Disclaimer; I do not own harry potter or any of the characters. I tried to get Draco, but I lost the case.(sigh) Oh well.

Onto a brighter note, I hope you like this fic.

Called 'Hermione blonde' for lack of a better title.

Without further ado, I Princess Beeduru present to you the first chapter of Hermione, blonde.

'Hermione, Hermione.' He nudged with added urgency.

'What is it Ronald?' Annoyance plainly etched into every word.

She had a right to be angry. A very big right indeed! Her friends had turned against her, and were telling her to do the impossible.

It all started with the Order meeting last week. The Order was trying to round up remaining death eaters who could be a possible threat to wizarding society today.

Voldemort had been defeated last year. It seemed that the world wasn't ready for him to take over it at that point in time and so he failed miserably in his effort to do so. Harry of course was the one who incanted a well placed 'AVADA KEDAVRA', while Hermione and Ron helped strategize and helped the Order infiltrate Voldemort's lair. This proved very helpful as they managed to find the weaknesses of the Death Eaters residing there as well as the Dark Lord's.

So far the Order, whose ranks had swollen dramatically had rounded up the very lethal death eaters and were now looking for those who had any inclination to the dark side.

On that list was the name, Draco Malfoy. The last thing known about him was that he was currently in his native homeland, France. He had disappeared off the face of the Earth after his failure of assassinating Albus Dumbledore and it was only due to a very fortunate tip that they heard that Malfoy was in fact ... well and alive. He had been spotted near the south of France.

This is where the Golden trio stepped in. It had fallen upon their shoulders to get him into their clutches. Two of them were going to be in the background while one person would actually have to make an acquaintance with him…as in become his …friend!

What an idea! Hermione scoffed. It was completely preposterous! The idea of Draco Malfoy and them being friends was as possible as Snape on a high and hugging Harry Potter.

It was at Harry's apartment where Hermione's life took a drastic turn. They were going to draw straws and whoever was chosen would be the one who would have to (gulp) court Malfoy.

Obviously the fates were having a party with lots of alcohol when they assigned Hermione to this task.

There had been a lot of head banging, death threats and crying not to mention screaming.

Till this day Harry's and Rons' ears hadn't resumed functioning properly

Now, here she was in the hot summer sun, in Marseille scoping out Draco Malfoy.

Ron was nudging her and finally, she snapped.

'Ron, what the hell is wrong with you? Stop acting like a bloody child and tell me what you want instead of manhandling my body!'

At this outburst, all the occupants of the small town looked at her.

Feeling abashed, she mumbled a feeble, 'sorry'. Trust Ron to anger me and then I'm the one who gets humiliated. How exactly does that work out?

But that question wasn't about to be answered because at this moment she saw why Ron was trying to get her attention.

There, in the shop across the street, a platinum blonde head could clearly be seen. Harry called them over to the side.

' Obviously you've seen what I've seen Ron. Now, Hermione are you ready?'

What a stupid question! ' If I say no, could we do this another day?'

Two glares were her answer. 'I'll take that as a no then.'

'Okay Hermione, now remember we need a disguise for you. We'll turn your hair…Ron, what colour should we make it?' he asked while changing direction.

'Well, it can't remain brown, and I don't think Hermione'll suit red.'

'Yeah, already have too many red heads in my life.' Harry said with a chuckle. ' Hey, how about black?' while pointing at his own hair.

'No I don't think so mate. It'll look too freaky. I mean she'll look like... weird. No offence, I mean it suits you and all but on her... I'm not so sure.'

'How about blonde?'

'Yeah, now that's good! Blonde. After all she needs to attract Malfoy's attention and hey, what better way to do that. I mean they could possibly bond over the similarity of their hair colours or something.' He said with an encouraging nod towards Hermione.

She tried very hard not to roll her eyes, but alas, she failed!

' Oh come on Mione, you'll look good as a blonde.' Ron flinched as she shot him a killer icy look.

'I'm only doing this because this is a good cause and I am part of this cause. I am going to turn Malferret in and then get on with my life as if nothing ever happened. Got that!'

With that morale booster she got up and pointed her wand at herself. Immediately her brown hair started fading as it turned lighter and lighter, until it was as blonde as can be.

'Okay, see Mione. Now that wasn't that bad. All we have to do now is change your appearance and find you a name, an alias, a pseudonym, a…..'

'Okay Ron, we get the picture.'

'Right, sorry hehe, got a little carried away there.'

'Nah, you don't say.'

'Hermione stop it. Lets think of a name and get this done and over with.' Came the wise voice of Harry.

'I know. How about Flora?'

'Flora?' Hermione asked incredulously. 'No way am I going to be named after a fairy dealing with flowers.'

'Oh come on Mione, no one will know its you. Besides it will help your image, your act, your pretense, your…ahem. Sorry about that. So you are now officially christened, Flora…Durmwood. Yes that's it, Flora Durmwood.'

'Oh goody.' She hissed.

'Now for the image.' Said Ron.

'What? I'm perfectly fine as it is thank you very much. I'm blonde already, I don't need to change anymore than I already have.'

'Come on Mione, I'm not trying to be rude, but Malfoy hardly looks at girls like you. He likes them skimpy and all made up, you know…' the quelling look that was shot at him would have made a lesser man cower in fear, but Harry wasn't a lesser man and was determined to carry on.

'Remember Hermione, its just an act, a façade. You know you're not like that and we know you're not like that, but that git in there,' while pointing over his shoulder, 'does not know that. The quicker you get him to start liking you the quicker we can get back to our lives.'

'Don't you dare Harry Potter. Not The puppy dog look, no I will not fall for it… I repeat I will not… ALRIGHT! Stop, I'll do it okay! I'll look like a stupid whore and get him to like me, just don't look at me like that!'

'Gets her everytime' Harry sniggered to himself. Ron was looking over at him with a look of awe saying, you-have-to-tell-me-how-to-do-that-man.

Mumbling incoherently, Hermione started altering her clothes. Every centimeter she shortened her skirt she glared at the two boys. She grudgingly made her top shorter as well, showing off her flat stomach.

The final touch was putting on make up. She secretly thanked Ginny for telling her about these tips. She applied sparkly lipgloss and a neutral eye shadow that would bring out her eye colour (or so Ginny had said)

When she was finished she turned around to show her boys the result. Ron became very red and his ears started burning up. Harry wasn't faring much different either. His mouth had been open for the past three minutes already.

When four minutes had passed, it was the final straw. Hermione stopped tapping her foot impatiently and whacked the boys with her handbag.

What was more infuriating was the fact that they didn't even look remotely abashed for openly ogling their best friend of ten years.

The nerve of them! She huffed.

While she was muttering to herself about the idiocy of the opposite sex, she missed the interaction going on between Harry and Ron.

(A.N- NOOOO. Not that sort of interaction)

She was unaware of Harry and Ron dragging her to the local grocery shop. She was unaware of them pushing the door open, and most importantly, she was unaware that she had just bumped headfirst into none other than Draco Malfoy!

Outside the shop, Harry and Ron were laughing their heads off. The look on Mione's face was enough to send even Voldemort into hysterics.

After gaining his breath he gasped out before relapsing into laughter, 'Wow, Hermione, blonde. Who would have thought?'

A.N- Who would have thought indeed.

And that folks is the first chapter! Tell me how you liked it by pressing the little button in the corner. I'll only update, if I get reviews alright. So my beautiful people, start reviewing. Till next time, see ya!