Against My Will

by kayayeteferturtle

Set a few years before the attack at Shiganshina Emory is thrown forcefully into the Scout regimen. Emory isn't the conventional soldier however, and pushes the buttons of everyone. When Emory comes toe-to-toe with Levi she passes him off as another order obeying drone, but there is an undeniable connection between the two. Will her past effect her building feelings towards Levi?

1. Chapter 1

I can't lie I have done some awful things in my life, but getting arrested for stealing an apple for a starving girl was not how I thought I would get incarcerated. I've always been a rebel, or at least a hard headed girl with nothing to lose, but I do have a soft spot for those who have are going through the same struggles as I have. I grew up on the metaphorical "south side" of everywhere. I've never really had a home, but I guess I could say that my life started in the northern region of Wall Maria. As I sit here in my small, dingy, moldy prison cell I can't help but go over my life and all the rather stupid decisions I've made that landed me here. The might have been stupid decision, but I can proudly say that I don't regret them. I don't even regret stealing that apple. I, and believe it or not many others live by a certain code, but I'll get to that later, right now I hear a few guards heading my way.

"Good morning, or is it evening yet? Eh, either way, hello pigs." I announced rather loudly letting it echoed through the prison hall

I heard hoops and hollers from my fellow prisoners as my words bounced their way to them.

"Get up inmate it's time to put your skill to the test." A tall and thin man announced as he began to unlock my cell door

"You two finally going to take me up on my offer? Even without my trusted swords I can take you both down." I laughed as I stood in front of my cell door

"Oh no sweetheart, we are going to finally let you try and bring down a titan. You've been talking all this shit about how you can do it without ODM gear, well now is your chance." The second man who was significantly shorter than the first boasted

"What happens when I live up to all the hype? Let's make a wager, I win I walk free, and if I lose, well of course that means I die. I see it as a win, win." I mocked

"Freedom, sure what could it hurt." The second man sneered and had an evil glint in his eyes.

I narrowed my eyes at him wary to a possible hidden motive, or him being in of something that could end badly for me even if I win. The door was finally opened and I stepped out to allow them to hand cuff me and escort me to the battling arena.

"I said I'll do it without ODM gear, but at least allow me my swords, and not those piece of shit swords the military uses, I want my swords." I protested as we walked through the corridors

"Don't worry that pretty head of yours; we got all of your stuff waiting for you. We figured that fighting without ODM gear was going to be hard enough, so we've allowed you all the weaponry you can carry. That includes your precious swords." The tall man laughed down to me like I was a joke

The two men laughed and slapped each other on the back, and I felt a hand firmly grip the toned muscles of my ass. My body went ridged as dark memories broke the flood gates. A painful past came flashing before my eyes. My back burned as hundreds of scars grew sensitive to the fabric of my shirt rubbing against them. Visions of being tied down, blood, ropes, whips, and pain, so much pain flashed over and over again before my eyes.

"You better remove your hand sir or you'll be the first person I find when I'm free." I snarled

The man's grip got tighter for a second before he released and place his hand back on my mid-back, "When you're free." The man laughed

"Here we are." They announced and opened a door that leads into their armory.

The forcefully shoved me inside and stepped in behind me. I scanned the room uninterested by the weapons; I was looking for two things in particular. I scanned over and over again and then I saw a familiar glimmer hidden behind canisters of ODM gear gas.

"Trying to hide them from me? We have a bond that neither of you could understand. Take off my cuffs so I can get them." I snapped

"Damn it. I owe you 5 bucks." The taller one sighed to the shorter one as he un-cuffed my shackles

I rubbed my wrists and approached my beloved swords. I kicked the canisters away and grabbed the double edged, bastard swords. Their scabbards laid hidden behind them and I began to strap it on to its rightful place at my back. I slide both swords behind me in their scabbards and walked back to where my keepers waited.

"Come on boys, I have a date with a titan." I announced happily as I walked out of the room

"Wait! That is really all you are going to take?" The short one asked confused

In the blink of an eye I withdrew on sword and held the sharp pointed tip millimeters from his Adam's apple, "Don't question my abilities with these swords."

I lowered the sword and gracefully put it back behind me. The two blink several times trying to collect their thoughts and process what had just happened before following several paces behind me. I stopped in front of a set of think wooden doors. I could hear the roar and cheering of a crowd clearly behind them. My keepers didn't say a word on what to do next so I pushed both doors open with ease and stepped out into the arena. The roar of the crowd grew louder as I entered and fan began to chant "Blood Bath" as they took notice to the lack of ODM gear. I slowly turned around looking at the thousands of face staring down at me, cheering for my death. Since when did this become a sport watching so called criminals die battling them. Every face I saw looked of glee and excitement as I continued to slowly turn around except one. A man, he had short black hair and it looked like it had been buzzed into a more stylish bowl cut. He looked annoyed, or uninterested by this so called sport, or he just had resting bitch face. He sat smack in the middle of the sitting area. He was wearing the Scout's Wings of Freedom on his tan jacket, but a white shirt with a ruffled ascot tucked neatly into the neck. Now that I was really observing it looked like several of other men from the Scout regimen was sitting next to and around him.

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE!" a loud voice came booming through the arena

Close to the Scouts was a stage where a short portly man waddled his way to the center. He was dressed in lavish and brightly colored clothes of purples and yellows. He had a clean shaved face and graying red hair.

"As you can see here we have a challenger who thinks they can take on a titan without proper training…"

"I guess proper is a good way to put it, but trust me pot roast I have training… my life has been nothing but training." I rolled my eyes and thought to myself

"But to give it even more of a challenge this young lady here has decided to take on a titan without ODM gear." The man exclaimed and the cheering in the crowd grew so loud that I covered my ears to dull it down

"The woman you see down there before you is a criminal! She has been caught stealing food from a respectable vendor! Since being imprisoned she has done nothing but boast about her sword wielding abilities and how she could take down a titan better than any of our well trained Scouts." The man said with a flourish that cause the already rowdy crowd to become almost mob like.

"Let's get to this! Release the beast!" The man yelled barely audible over the crowd

A large door slowly began to lift upward. I turned to face the where my opponent would be entering. Once half way up a 7 meter titan came stumbling out with an ear to ear grin. The idiot beast looked like he was almost giddy to be here, but you couldn't blame the ugly son-of-a-bitch, a good fight was something to behold. I took a steading breath and slowly grew both of my well trusted swords from behind me. The light hit them and the sent a blinding light into the crowd; I heard a chorus of "oh's and awe's" from the crowd. The titan quickly took notice to the shiny swords and began to run at me full speed. I smiled, more like a snarled, and ran full tilt towards him. The titan got down on all fours and I began to watch his gait analyzing it for the perfect moment. Once I saw my opportunity available I jumped stepping hard on the titans pointed nose. I leapt straight up and allowed the titan to move a few steps ahead before falling back down and stabbing one of my bastard swords deep into his shoulder. The crowd went crazy and everyone was on their feet. I relished the feeling of being cheered on and if fueled my fire. The titan screamed out in pain as the double edge sword dug deep into his skin. The bastard stood up and temporarily threw me off balance. I balanced myself on the one sword stuck in the titans should and used the second one to give me another place to hang on to. The titan began to swing its long arms trying to swat me off, but I was prepared. Once he brought both arms back and hugged himself I removed my swords and used his arms as a platform and jumped prepared to strike the nap of his neck. I swung my mighty swords slicing out a large chuck of his neck. The titan stilled and slowly began to fall forward. I rode the fall calmly and proudly as the beast came crashing to the ground. The crowd with dead silent, but once the dust settled and the saw my standing with blood steaming off my swords, the roar returned louder than ever.

"Would you all look at that! She-She actually did it." The pot roast man exclaimed baffled.

The titan began to steam underneath me causing it to get uncomfortably hot. I jumped down and waved to my adoring fans, but I took notice to the Scouts leaving in an orderly fashion.

"Good show inmate, but now it's time to go." The tall man was walking towards me holding out a set of shackles.

"No, no, I was promised my freedom." I began to back up ready to run

"Oh don't worry we aren't taking you back to your cell. Just come peacefully and you'll be out of here in no time." The man said snidely

"I'll come peacefully, but only if I can go without the handcuffs." I snapped back

A tall blonde man with unmistakable eyebrow began to approach us, "It's fine, you don't need to shackle her."

"Yes Commander Erwin." The guard bowed

I followed the man who must be Erwin out of the arena and through another corridor. We took several turns and then stopped in front door. The Commander opened the door and I quickly noticed the same Scouts that were sitting in the crowd. The Commander took a seat behind an old and dusty desk and motioned for me to take a seat in front of him.

"I'd rather stand." I grumbled

"If you wish." Erwin took out a file of papers and opened them up in front of him, "Is your name Emory Jensen?"

"It's just Em." I corrected

"And it says here you have brown hair and green eyes, distinct scars on your back, and are approximately 5ft 2in tall." Erwin stated but it sounded almost like a question.

There was an awkward silence in the room for a few moments and then Erwin looked up to me expecting an answer. I looked around the room to all of those present, but no one answered.

"Umm… are you blind?" I retorted

"Just answer me." Erwin said through gritted teeth

"Yes I am a short brunette with green eyes. I weigh 130 pounds, I'm 23 years old, have no allergies to speak of, I enjoy long walks by water, and my favorite food is surprisingly not apples." I replied sarcastically

I heard a few muffled laughs from the other men in the room and I smiled to myself proudly.

"There is no need for the attitude, Emory." Erwin arched a rather large eyebrow

"It's Em." I mumbled and rolled my eyes, "Is this a part of the release process or something? I'd really like start enjoying my freedom."

"You will be leaving soon, but keep in mind you aren't completely free." Erwin straightened the folder and closed it.

"No, got something wrong here. See I was promised if I win I get to walk out of here a free woman, and I get to go back to my slum dog life roaming the land." I corrected Erwin

"No the deal was if you win and I like you join the military. You won, but I starting to not like you. I can't deny that you have abilities that could be useful in the field." Erwin sighed, "You are coming with us so you can be a part of the Scout regiment."

"No." I said sternly

"Excuse me?" Erwin asked shocked

"You heard me, no. I don't like people, especially people like all of you, I don't play well with others, and I have a life to go live outside of here." I said casually

"What going back to thieving and criminal mischief?" I deep smooth voice said somewhere close to me

I turned to follow the voice and met the un-amused eyes of the man from the crowd you caught my attention.

"Possibly, but what's it to you? You're not the military police, and by the look on your face you don't want to be here anyways." I sneered

The man stood and I was shocked to see that he almost at eye level with me. He was maybe a few inches taller than me, if that. He circled around me several times inspecting my body, my posture, and making me incredibly uncomfortable. The flood gates opened again and my dark past came flashing in front of my eyes again. I silently prayed that he wouldn't touch me, or that this wasn't going to way that it usually goes when a man slowly circles around me.

"What is it Captain Levi?" Erwin asked intrigued

"She's replaceable, really there isn't anything special about her other than her abilities, but guaranteed we can find another with the same abilities and less lip. Possibly one that's been through the cadet camp." Levi replied with a monotone voice

"You're one to judge, what are you 5' 4" barely bigger than me. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black." I replied angrily

"Prove it then." Levi looked me straight in the eyes

"Reverse psychology? I'm not stupid." I narrowed my eyes

"If you don't accept this offer you go back into the dungeon." Erwin narrowed his eyes

I took my attention away from Levi and directed it back to Erwin where I weighted my options, but there wasn't much to consider. If I ever wanted to see the light of day again I would have to accept their offer, but that meant spending my life following someone directions and having to work with people I could care less about. It could be possible to sneak away and continue my normal life with the only family I have left, but I would live constantly looking behind my back waiting to get caught. It was either literally be alone in a cell, or either be metaphorically alone surround around people that will only see me as a criminal. I stared at Erwin without actually seeing him as I ran all the scenarios I could think over through my head.

"Fine, I'll join." I said coldly and I swear I saw both Erwin and Levi smile, "But you get what you get. I don't do so well with authority; just asked dumb and dumber over there."

The two guard's heads suddenly snapped to attention as the Scouts looked to them. They both blushed being caught not completely paying attention and I laughed silently.

"One condition though." I turned back to Erwin

"Continue." Erwin shook his head

"I use my swords not your shitty excuse for cutlery." I placed a hand on one of the hilts behind me

"I think that is manageable, anything else?" Erwin asked surprisingly understanding

"Well if you're asking; I'm not starting has someone's page girl, I don't do errands or scutt work. I'm not going to your stupid cadet school; I already know all the same things they do, and I'm guaranteed better at swordsmanship than they are. Lastly, I'm not going to be the just one of the newbies; I'm not going to be their friend, or room with them, I told you I don't play well with others and I meant it. I want a respectable place in your squad or whatever you call it." I listed out sternly

"I'll make it work. Now we should get going before the sunsets. I assume you know how to ride a horse?" Erwin still was surprisingly cavalier about my demands

"Yes, of course." I replied warily, suspicious of his calm composure

Erwin shook his head and everyone stood and saluted the Commander with right hand in a fist across their body and resting on their heart, and their left behind them on the opposite side. I looked around confused on what I was supposed to do so I swung my head around looking for any hint of what to come next. Once the Commander left the room everyone stopped saluting and followed behind. I fell in behind them and blindly followed them through the corridors until we found the exit. The sun was blinding and I shielded my eyes with an arm. I wasn't sure how long I had been underground in the dungeons, but if I had to guess it was at least a month, which meant that I hadn't seen sunlight in a month give or take. The soldiers started mounting their steeds and I looked for a spare horse.

"You'll ride with me." A low voice said

"Joy, Captain Excitement." I rolled my eyes as I turned to see Levi sitting on a horse extending a hand

I sighed and took his hand and jumped up onto the horse behind him. I was surprised by how soft and gentle his touch was, and the quick embrace sent goose bumps up my arm. We began through the town at a walk and I took the relaxed moment to let the sun wash over my face and warm my skin. I closed my eyes and stretched my head up towards the sky preventing any shadow from not allowing any precious light to go to waste.

"Enjoying the nice weather back there?" Levi asked sarcastically

"Not that you care, but yes." I replied not allowing his tone to ruin my moment

"You might want to hang on its going to get a little rough." Levi nearly laughed

"Wha-" I was cut short when the horse was kicked into a gallop

Out of surprised reaction I wrapped my arms around Levi's waist, and the momentum pushed my chest into his back. I couldn't tell by the flowy shirt that Levi was cut and defined. It took me by surprised by the muscles, and I could feel them tighten and contract and he matched the rhythm of the horses' gait. With my head centimeter from his shoulder I could smell the faint smells of sweat, pine needles, and… cleaning products? Now that I was unusually close to him I noticed how clean and well put together he was especially being in the military.

"We're here." Levi announced but didn't mention how I grabbed on to him

I looked past his shoulder and saw an old castle that must have belonged to a king thousands of years ago.

"I never thought I would be in a place like this." I whispered to no one in particular

"It dirty and run down so don't get excited." Levi ruined my moment

"Well I promise my room will be spotless." I said proudly

Levi turned his head slightly to look back at me, and I could see the corner of his lips turn upward slightly. From what I could tell from the little I knew about Levi, he wasn't someone who smiled often.

"You should try smiling more. It makes your eyes a little less depressed looking." I jested

The smile fell and Levi's almost permanent scowl took its place again. Levi turn back to face forward and we walked through a draw bridge like gate.

"Oh come one captain lighten up. You're going to have to get used to my humor seeing as though I'm going to be around for a little while… against my will. I'm trying to make the best of this. You know finding the happiness where ever I can." I laughed

Levi pulled back the reigns and the horse stopped immediately throwing me back against Levi's back.

"Get down." Levi commanded sternly

I slide down off the horse and Levi kicked the horse back into a walk and away they went.

"Wait! Where do I go?" I asked confused

"Just wait there." Levi said without raising his voice

"I don't trust him to come back." I grumbled as I looked around and tried to figure out where to go

I saw a group of people and figured I'd follow them because it was either they would go inside or lead me to food. I jogged to catch up and then began blend into the crowd so I wouldn't look like a confused civilian. I stood out, however, I was in ripped black pants, and baggy ill-fitting tunic, and ragged riding boots. I kept my head down and moved along with the flow of the soldiers. I got a few side eyes glances, but ignored them. As we moved closer towards the large castle doors I could smell bread baking and my stomach rumbled painfully reminding me that I hadn't eaten in days. Once we entered the castle I broke way and followed my nose to where I though the bread would be. I moved blindly through the halls and eventually lost my trail of yeasty goodness. Now I was just lost in a strange castle where I didn't know anyone except Levi and Erwin, and I they were the last people I wanted to run into.

"Are you lost." A now familiar deep voice came echoing through the hall

"Damn it." I whispered and turned around, "Yes, I am. I smelled food and now I'm lost and starving."

"First things first; I have your new clothes." Levi held out a bundle of neatly folded clothes

"I guess it beats these old rags, even if I now look like the rest of you sheep." I shrugged and approached Levi

"My chambers are just up here; you can change there and then I'll show you to the dining hall." Levi said coldly and walked past me without handing me the clothes

I was taken aback by his action, but I turned on my heels and followed behind. Levi pushed open a door with one hand and stepped inside holding it open for me to follow behind. When I was completely inside the first thing I noticed was how pristine everything was; the bed was made without a single crease, there was hardly anything on the desk in front of the window, but what was there has laying straight and spaced evenly from each other, and there wasn't a speck a dust anywhere to be seen. Levi closed the door and walked over to the bed where he placed the clothing. I began to take off my old rags and shoes when Levi turned around. I saw his cheeks blush a subtle pink as he looked at my slender, toned, scar riddled body.

"Have you ever seen a girl in her underwear before?" I asked in a serious tone

Levi didn't turn around but cast his gaze down to a spot in front of him.

I laughed through my nose and walked past him to where my new clothes were waiting. I stood side by side with Levi and I could see him looking at my back through my peripherals. My scars were not subtle what-so-ever; many of them were raise and ridge, others were pale and long, and I had a few that were still healing. My scars were not something I felt like discussing ever and definitely didn't want to talk about them with Levi. I unbuckled my scabbards and slide them off my shoulders so I could place them on top the bed. I slid the creamy white tunic over my head and it fit much better than the previous shirt I had been wearing. Next I put on the stark white pants on and had to jump a few times to get them over my ass. They were skin tight against my thighs and butt, but I figured that it was for the ODM straps and gear. The pants had a leather skirt-like piece sown on to it that was scalloped on top of one another in the front. I grabbed my scabbard and buckled it back on to my back before putting on the tan leather jacket on top. The tilts stuck up and they were not hindered by the collar of the coat. I reached back with both hands and pretended to draw the swords a few times.

"I'll have to make some adjustments, but this isn't too bad and comfortable so that is a plus." I said running my hands over my new clothes.

I hadn't noticed that Levi had turned back around and was watching my pretend with my swords.

"Can we eat now?" I asked holding my stomach as it growled

Levi shook his head and went back to the door and opened it allowing me to go out first. I waited for him to exit so I didn't get lost again. Levi walked past me and down the hall without saying anything, and I had to jog to catch up with him. We walked for what like miles before I could smell food again. Levi pushed open another door and the aroma of food filled my nose and caused my mouth to salivate. Levi hadn't lead me to the dining hall but instead directly into the kitchen. He grabbed two trays and began to fill them up, and I was on his heels so he didn't get far away with my food. Once he had loaded each plate with a variety of food he exited through a different door and into a large hall filled with hundreds of other soldiers dressed identically. There was a sea of tan, blue, and white from the coats and the wings of freedom on their sleeves. I continued to stay close behind Levi as he navigated through the dining hall. Eventually he stopped at a table full of other people eating. Everyone looked up or stopped their conversation when Levi placed the trays down. Everyone greeted Levi warmly and then noticed as I stood behind him confused as to what was going and who they were.

"Emory this is my team, and now you're a part of it too. This is Emory Jensen." Levi said monotonously and sat down

I was greeted just as warmly as Levi had, "It's just Em"

I sat down across from Levi and began to shovel food into my mouth.