Disclaimer: Nope, don't own Naruto.
This takes place either before Deidara's attack and after the Part 1 Naruto, OR RIGHT after the Ichibi/Shukaku was *spoiler* extracted from Gaara. This is a family/humor one-shot that seems...not quite like that at first...
This does have a little cussing. If you like the Sabaku Siblings acting like a "family" and like a little boys-being-boys, then this is for you. Enjoy!
"Alright, Gaara. Be on your guard. Our lives are on the line. If we're caught, then we have a high risk of certain death. Stay silent. Follow my orders. We must enter without being noticed, or the entire plan is a failure. This is an S-Class mission. From here on, it will be referred to as Operation: Undetected. Are you ready?" He paused, waiting. "Gaara...? Gaara, I asked if you're ready? ...Gaara! What's your position?!"
His brother was just staring at him. "I am right next to you."
Kankurou gave him a weird look. "No, I couldn't tell that...," he muttered sarcastically. "Now ready yourself. This is a delicate matter, so we cannot afford to mess up."
"Why am I here again?"
"Because this is important and if you don't come I'll tell the entire village of Suna that you own a teddy bear."
Gaara narrowed his black-ringed eyes in slightly visible confusion. "But I don't."
"That's the point," Kankurou grinned, peering around the corner for signs of combat. "Now hurry. Now is our chance!"
After a quick blink of the eyes, the Kazekage followed his sibling, growing steadily closer to the heart of the enemy territory. The puppet-master, clean of his war paint for once and looking ever so intimidating in a dark t-shirt and casual pants, rolled his body expertly over an obstacle, landing on his feet in a crouching fashion. Gaara appeared next to him, even more terrifying in his white tee and faded jeans. Both gave each other a tiny nod and pressed onward.
Skirting potential hazards and stepping over objects that could make noise proved quite difficult. It wasn't the most tidy location. But being train shinobi, they accomplished it without mistake. Kankurou, balanced on his right knee and checking his surroundings, waved a hand. This indicated it was safe. Gaara frowned deeper and joined his side.
Operation: Undetected was progressing flawlessly. Step 1 consisted of entering the area of danger without being heard. This had been the easy part. As it was becoming more and more troublesome as time stretched longer, Kankurou was now apprehensive. This formidable quest was too extensive, and it was going to be too late soon. Even if they were just minutes off the required moment, the entire process would be for nothing. And as unfortunate yet proud ninjas, they would most likely...die...
Luckily, both were prepared as Step 2 arrived.
In their own way, of course.
"Let's go!" Kankurou whispered harshly, leaping across the room and stopping next to the entrance of the headquarters. Gaara hung his head and focused his chakraat his sock-covered feet. He then jumped and stood on the ceiling, hanging upside-down. From there, he had a good look of what lay ahead. Movement catching his attention, the young man ran toward the left noiselessly.
"As expected," Gaara murmured as he dropped next to his brother, still with a bored expression. "There is only one."
"Heh," Kankurou clenched a fist, his tone still low so they weren't noted. "This will be simple. You remember the plan?"
He sighed. "Yes."
"Then let's get this show on the road," the brown-haired member of the Sabaku family smirked. "Gaara...I want to say something before we do this..."
"..."
"It was a pleasure knowing you. That is, if we fail. Which we probably will. I can only hope we don't lose our lives too brutally and mercilessly..."
The Kazekage scowled at him. "Your shinobi team must adore you and your inspirational speeches."
"Yeah," he smiled.
With Kankurou still in the lead because he was much more enthusiastic about 'certain death', the brothers crept through the opening and kept themselves as concealed as possible. Neither spoke, but both could hear the soft bangs as someone rustled around ahead. Time was of the essence. As was their secrecy.
And then the enemy was right in front of them.
Female. Approximately 165 centimeters tall and 47.9 kg. Hair: blonde. Rank: appearing to be Jounin. Age: perhaps 19...? What? It's not like they kept track of such things like age.
Her back was turned to them while she hummed some sort of 'war song'. In her hand was a type of deadly tool. The surface next to her was lined with similar weapons. Kankurou's eyes became slitted as he tensed his muscles, keen for the right instant. Gaara just crossed his arms, ready for the signal when it came. He was still a bit stressed about Kankurou's threat... Though he refused to show that outwardly.
"Now," he hissed, darting across the No Man's Land. Gaara watched in exasperated amazement as Kankurou slipped as his socks hit tile.
The younger brother performed a quick seal, making sure his words were barely audible. From his gourd he'd left behind by his bed, a small amount of sand broke free and shot around the maze of halls, clamping around Kankurou's waist. The rest piled down to the ground, catching him midair. Well, except for the one foot that had managed to stay on the flooring. He peeked over his shoulder, sheepishly shrugging and mouthing a 'thanks'. Slowly and silently, the sand moved away and Kankurou regained his composure.
Once Gaara was sure the sand he'd called on was long gone and back where it belonged, he pursued the 'Team Leader'. Running on soundless steps, the Kazekage joined the puppeteer's side once again.
They were so, so close! Back pressed tightly against the barrier and breathing thick yet soft breaths, they exchanged glances. Kankurou grinned, Gaara glared. "You almost blew it," he whispered.
The other lifted his shoulders in embarrassment. "Sorry. I'm not used to this style of battle," he replied, hushed.
The enemy still hadn't taken notice of them, which was a complete miracle. Or a fluke, one or the other. The point was, they were winning in the race for survival. And they might as well go for it...it was too late to turn back now anyway.
Kankurou turned to his partner. "Ready?" Gaara merely nodded slightly. "Good. Step 3 commences."
Gaara stared at him as Kankurou tapped his fingers against his arm, waiting impatiently. The red-haired of the two huffed. "That uses too much chakra for a situation like this."
"...Please?"
Well...they had come this far...damn Kankurou's puppy eyes.
In bitter silence, Kankurou brightened a little as Gaara crisscrossed his legs and rapidly formed a patter of seals. He then lifted his hand to his face to close one of his eyes. Off to the side, by the end of the barrier, a third eye of sand materialized. Had it not been Gaara, Kankurou may have hugged him. But instead, he began to muster up his own energy for his turn to shine.
Gaara leaned to the side and said quietly, "She's not looking."
"Good," Kankurou muffled, spinning on his heels and sitting up. He lifted his head slyly to peek over the counter-top. The enemy had her back to him, arms folded as she observed the oven. Lifting his hand so it was level with his peeping face, five familiar thin, blue chakra strings flashed into view and attached themselves onto the ideal target. "Step 4...," he murmured to himself, "retrieve the item..."
"Hurry," Gaara stated monotone from his right in a shushed voice.
Kankurou dipped his head in acknowledgement, twitching his fingers to move the strings. Faintly, the tray lifted an inch or two above the granite surface. A bead of sweat trickled down his cheek as Kankurou urged the metallic plate towards them.
Great Kami, they smelled good!
Gaara was already holding out the plastic baggie he'd kept in his pocket when Kankurou sat back down, hidden once again. He dumped the batch of fresh cookies into it and closed it. He lifted the bag into the air in joy. "Ya-tah~!"
"Idiot!" Gaara put a hand to his forehead.
"KANKUROU!"
The boy froze, lowering the bag back behind the counter. "Oops...shit..."
"Give those back!" Temari ordered loudly. "I said you could have some after dinner, baka!"
"Gaara, run for it!" he shouted, scrambling to his feet and taking his brother's arm. Both headed for the open window. Kankurou jumped out on the porch first, disappearing onto the roof.
Gaara paused before doing the same, seeing that Temari had her spatula in one hand, small hand-fan in the other. Her eyes were blazing as she put on a fake, dangerously calm smile. "Gaara...get your sorry self back over here right now..."
Not really liking that idea, the Kazekage saluted her briefly and leapt after Kankurou, grateful he'd left his gourd back in his bedroom. Less weight to carry.
Two men, clad in their war uniforms of t-shirts and jeans, fleeing from their S-Class mission, made their way across the village of Suna. Behind them chased the enemy, now armed with her large iron fan of death. Pedestrians' jaws dropped. From the window of the office building, Baki shook his head and groaned. A few elders chuckled. Some kids ran alongside below as not to miss the action.
Kankurou screamed, "I'm so sorry~!"
Gaara rolled his eyes again, but kept pace with his brother at top speed.
Temari yelled back that she didn't want excuses.
But needless to say, every person in Sunagakure was wondering the same thing: Again?
~Finish~