Author's Note: This is just some pointless fluff I've had planned for a while. I figure that since I'm usually sort of a downer fic-wise, I'd do a little something funny, for my sanity and yours. ^^; Also, this is quite possibly the stupidest thing I've ever written. Just putting that out there.

Warnings: If boys in dresses disturb you, you should probably just turn around and we'll never speak of this again. Also, a hint of implied Max/Ray. But mostly? It's just stupid. Really, really stupid.

Obligatory Disclaimer: I do not own Rune Factory. And that's probably for the best. XD

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Girls Are Weird

Ray always enjoyed visiting the manor for a few rounds of chess with Max, and he particularly enjoyed winning. What he didn't enjoy was the aftermath, or at least that was his train of thought as he dashed up the stairs, narrowly avoiding the Queen flying towards him. Max, on the other hand, seemed to be having a rather bitter sort of fun. Ever the sore loser, he was eager to overtake Ray in something that afternoon, especially if it involved throwing and running, making a terrible racket on the hard floors, sending echoes through the whole house. As he reached the top of the staircase, Ray was knocked off-balance by a Pawn to the side of the head. He was starting to think that Max might be a bit highly-strung. Before he had any time to reflect on this, he found himself flat on his face in the upstairs hallway, staring at two particularly fancy sets of feet.

The feet in question belonged to Rosalind and Julia, triggering a horrible sinking feeling. Every time I stumble in to them like this, he thought, I end up being used in some kind of horrible experiment. In Ray's experience, this was true. After all, there had been the Homemade Cold Medicine Thing, the Bread Mold Thing, the New Perfume Formula thing, the Ice Water Thing, and countless dubious pastries. He'd been poked, prodded, sickened, and asked battery after battery of uncomfortable questions. It all left him somewhat wary, especially when Julia looked at him with that one particular look on her face and said-

"…Raaay?"

Yes, that's it all right.

All feelings of vague dread aside, he had always considered himself a good sport. Embarrassment was guaranteed at this point, but they'd never done anything too horrible to him. At very least, he was in one piece.

"Oh… Julia… Something you need? Or you, Rosalind…?"

Rosalind was staring right through him, in her usual way, and cut him off before he could finish.

"Cecilia needs you. We've been working on something and you're just the person we need right now."

Ray swallowed, then nodded. The two girls each took an arm and hauled him to his feet.

"…Do you have him?"

It was Cecilia. Julia turned to respond.

"Yes! We'll be bringing him in now!"

By this time, Max had arrived at the top of the stairs, brandishing a Knight, his coat pockets jammed with chess pieces. Almost as though choreographed, Cecilia padded down the hall.

"…Max, haven't I told you not to run, in the house!? If you break something, who do you think will have to clean- Have you been throwing chess pieces again?"

Max jammed his hands in to his pockets.

"I have no idea what you are talking about."

An awkward silence fell over the group. Cecilia shook her head briskly.

"…Anyway, could you come back here for a bit?"

Ray started to follow, but before he could, he found himself being dragged along by a pair of snickering girls. Max, never being one to tolerate boredom or exclusion, trailed behind them.

Arriving at what he realized was Rosalind's room, Ray examined his surroundings. No bottles, no weird smells, no step ladders, no cakes. He sighed with relief. This isn't going to be so bad. But before he could relax completely, his eyes wandered and fixed on a dress form, complete with dress. He didn't recall having seen it in the room before. I can see where this is going.

Cecilia was positively beaming.

"Isn't it pretty?"

"It… What?"

"I just finished it. Isn't it pretty? It…

Rosalind interrupted.

"It's for me, Ray. And I'd like to see how it works on a live person before I wear it out of the house."

If Ray hadn't seen it coming before, he sure did now.

"…So, what do you want me for?"

Julia piped up.

"…Because you've got a similar build! See, Rosalind, I told you he'd work perfectly!"

Rosalind grabbed Ray by the shoulders and positioned him next to her, examining herself and then him in the mirror.

"Why, yes, I suppose you were right. I'll have to give you that one, I guess."

Julia flashed a self-satisfied grin at her friend. Ray just stood there looking generally mortified. He had, after all, just been told that he looked like a girl and should wear a dress. At least that's what he got out of it.

Cecilia carefully took the dress and held it before him. It was pink. It was frilly. Its construction had probably caused a widespread ribbon shortage. He wasn't even sure that Rosalind could wear it with her dignity intact, let alone him.

"Do I… Have to wear this?"

"Rosalind would appreciate it."

Julia chimed in again.

"We all would!"

Both her and Rosalind broke in to mad giggles, then suddenly went very quiet. Ray's eyes darted from them, to the stern pointy-eared seamstress in front of him, to Max, who was perched backward on his sister's vanity chair, looking uncannily smug for someone sitting on a girly piece of miniature furniture. Ray fought back one of the his rare urges to just punch him in the mouth and be done with it. Julia and Rosalind came to stand on either side of Cecilia, the three of them looking equally grave. Rosalind blinked.

"Oh, you will wear it, Ray."

"Can't you just try it on?"

"Nonsense. Seeing something on someone else isn't the same as looking in the mirror. For one thing, everything gets all reversed."

"Yes, but…"

"…Julia! Closet!"

At Rosalind's command, Julia snatched the dress, directed Ray in to the closet, tossed the dress in after him, and shut the door. He jiggled the handle, but it was useless. One of them must have been holding on to it. He heard muffled laughter outside, some of which obviously belonged to Max. Stupid bored rich idiot. The laughter died down, and Julia's voice reached him from the outside.

"We're not letting you out until you've changed!"

Ray was starting to get irritated. Well, it's not like I can live back here for the rest of my natural life. With an exasperated sigh, he shed his normal clothes in favor of the humiliating dress.

"Ok… I'm ready."

Julia nearly ripped the door off the hinges, her face sparkling with a perverse excitement. Then the whole room erupted in laughter. Julia yanked him out of the closet and shoved him in front of the mirror.

"Ray, you're absolutely adorable!"

Rosalind came to stand next to him so he was sandwiched between the two of them.

"I could not agree more!"

Cecilia faked at being indignant.

"What, no compliments on my work?"

Rosalind beamed back at her.

"It's positively wonderful, and I can now say that I'll wear it with pride!"

The laughter began again, Max being the worst offender. Ray didn't feel so much adorable as ridiculous. He saw himself in the mirror, pink, fluffy, slouching, and stunned.

"I look…"

"Horrible" was coming to mind. "Foolish" was probably more descriptive. And, as much as he wanted to smack the laughter clean out of Max, "hilarious" just might have worked. But he didn't even have time to decide which one of those to use, much less actually say it. Julia wouldn't allow that.

"Well, if you're having any problems with the way you look, it's probably that posture! You should really straighten up!"

She place one hand on his shoulder, the other on the small of his back, and physically yanked him in to a better position.

"…And don't make a habit of that! You could freeze that way and then you'll never look quite right again. Also, I think it can hurt or something."

Ray looked at himself again. Not much better, but he supposed he looked a bit less comical. Rosalind was eating the whole thing up, sitting on the bed with the self-important look of someone being entertained. It dawned on him that none of this was about seeing how she'd look in the thing. I guess she was just bored and cooked this scheme up with the other girls. And maybe, he thought to himself, I don't look that bad.

He jumped at the sound of Julia's voice.

"Hey, let's go back to my place! I've got lots of things we could put in his hair!"

The three of them darted from the room, leaving the door open behind them. Ray fell back on the bed. Well, as humiliation goes, that wasn't bad. At least I wasn't in my underpants like I was for the day with the ice water. Max came to sit next to him.

"You know, I wasn't really laughing at you. Just the way you were acting."

"…The difference being?"

"It's just…" He started laughing again. "…The look on your face!"

Ray frowned. Max collected himself.

"But in all seriousness, I really think you look nice."

Ray remembered thinking that this hadn't been too embarrassing, and thought maybe that he'd been a bit too hasty to declare that.

"Max, you… Well, you're just plain weird sometimes."

Max grinned slyly.

"…Probably."