Hello! This is my first time writing. It centers around Kagome and Sesshomaru it'll be a slow build up. Somewhat dark themed since Kagome has gone through a lot. I'll make the chapters somewhat long.

Sexual parts, death and violence.

I do not own Inuyasha.

Chapter 1

Nothing was supposed to be this way. Everything they worked so hard for, though completed, couldn't bring back the happiness they felt. And it wasn't coming that much was certain.

Kagome stood there, eyes hollowed staring at the markings. Inuyasha would scold her for coming here so often, saying it wasn't good for her, but that also stopped. There were no hard feelings since after all, he too was mourning. Though he never had proper time before considering their on going fight with Naraku, it was hitting him hard now. So often she'd eat alone, or wake up and he wasn't in the village. Knowing where he was, it was okay, he needed to let it out she knew.

But now, there was no one. No Shippo. No Sango. No Miroku. No one to distract her from the pain of not only Kikiyos death still haunting Inuyasha, but no one to help her properly mourn her now dead friends.

She dropped to her knees in a sobbing fit, pathetically reaching to trace her fingers along the tombstone. It wasn't right. Shippo was only a child. Sango was supposed to be married to the man she loved, whom she laid her life down for and was ready to die with. And here she was still standing. Why was she so scared? Why was she always so goddamn scared. The thought plunged through her brain a thousand times and she couldn't answer it.

Time and time again her friends had bailed her out of death. Yet there was no doing the same for them.

She grabbed the sides of her head and started wailing louder, allowing guilt to consume her.

With the death of Sango and Shippo, Miroku left them. It all became too much. She'd find him, pale and freezing from the night air, yet feeling nothing. Showing nothing, as he stared at his loves grave.

Kagome knew he didn't hold her accountable, but he still couldn't look at her in the eyes yet. And that hurt. For weeks she'd try bringing him food or a blanket, but he wouldn't eat or take it. He'd only give her a slight smile and nod, eyes showing absolutely nothing. Until one day, he told Inuyasha he was leaving. He didn't argue with the Monk, as he lay flowers one last time and flew away on Kirara.

That's what hurt more than anything, that he said goodbyes to Inuyasha but not her. Not even a note. It only made her guilt worse since sleep decided to also leave her side.

She heard a shuffle behind her followed by footsteps.

"You know, you should probably go home for a bit Kagome. Take a break. I know you're upset, but I can't keep watching you like this in case a demon comes again."

Inuyashas words cut deep inside her. Though he was right, it wasn't the point. He'd rarely visit. She was understanding, but it still stung her that he'd be so nervy considering all his time was spent at the dead priestess grave. A demon could attack at any time and she was always alone.

"Well, you're one to talk Inuyasha. Don't you think you could use a break as well? Besides, I'm always alone nowadays anyways in case a demon attacks.," her voice came out in a whisper.

He looked at her somewhat annoyed. Though true he did spend a lot of unhealthy time at Kikiyos grave, he wasn't screaming all the damn time for the whole village to hear. Not to mention, his own demon ears. He felt awful for Kagome but any pity has reached its limits since for the past weeks this village has reaked of sadness. And her scent was the most potent.

"Whatever Kagome, where I go isn't any of your damn business. I'm just saying what everyone else is thinking, you're driving us nugs. I'm not the one howling at the damn moon all the time. So if you want to mourn, go home and do it.," He spat. The words sounded harsher than he intended. It was followed by awkward tension.

He was expecting her to at least say something. Or a glare. But nothing.

She slowly rose to her feet, turning to face him. Her eyes were as bare as Mirokus and it tore him up.

She began walking. As he went to grab at her to apologize, she started to run. Fast as she could go until she reached the well and thrusted herself down. He was right. And she was alone.

Her hair stuck to her clamy skin, sweat soaking her clothes. There was nothing left for her in the past, but that truth wasn't an easy one to face. So much time, so much energy and love put in just for it to be spat back in her face. Inuyasha always was one for harshness that he didn't mean, but it hurt ever so slightly.

She had to leave though, at least his presence for now. If not things wouldn't have been pretty. She didn't want to fight with him, but he became a cold resentment that replayed in her head lately. They're friends. They're friends deserved better than what he had been doing. She just couldn't understand how he could stand to mourn Kikiyo, but not even give Sango and Shippo the same respect. But then again, she knew there was no answer. Because another thing, he was also one for excuses.