Disclaimer & what not: I dun own 'em, only own me copy of the first season and my Radiohead cd which for some odd reason inspired me to write this. O_o'''

Arnold J. Rimmer, former soft-light, now hard-light hologram couldn't get enough of…well…anything. It had been a week since the Legion incident, but he still found new things to remind him that he could touch and taste. But sadly, none of it was what he really wanted…

The hologram stared at Lister's empty bunk, muttering something about drunk smeg-headed gits. But it was an affectionate sort of muttered insult, if that's possible. Rimmer found himself running his hands over the curry and lager stained sheets of the younger man's bed. He paused, feeling something hard under the mass of blankets, tilting his head in curiosity. Carefully, he moved the blankets to the side to pull out a rather tattered and dog-eared notebook.

His diary? He flipped through the book, finding that most of it was ramblings about Kotchanski and how Rimmer was a smeghead and how much he wished he could get home, back to earth. Boring. Then something ridiculous caught his eye. Taking up an entire page, was a very…interesting drawing, or rather, sketch. It wasn't interesting in a sexual way, as the word as been commonly used to indicate or hint at such things, but instead, it was just…odd. Strange even.

"What the HELL?!" Rimmer stared at the dancing chibis, labled in an almost child-like print "Rimmer and Me." At the bottom of the page were the words "dance with me." He read the title aloud and blinked rapidly. "Just what the smeg is his problem?!" Lister, gay? Dave Lister, the man who lusted over Krissy Kotchanski daily, gay? Rimmer did a double take. It had been a while since Lister mentioned Kotchanski at all, so he couldn't say daily…But Listy? Gay?

"Maybe he's bi…" Rimmer didn't realize how hopeful he sounded until a few seconds later.

"Who's bi?" Lister's voice shook Rimmer from his thoughts.

"Ah! Listy!" He dropped the notebook and quickly shoved it under his own mattress. "No one. Must go, I think Kryten needs me to ah…help do that…thing…" The flustered hologram mumbled, quickly making his escape.

"Nutcase," Lister muttered and grabbed the pack of cigarettes he had come for and walked back to the bar for another drink. He sat down and buried his head in his arms. He thought that Rimmer getting a hardlight body would be a good thing, but instead, it was even more of a reminder of what he could never have. He was past the point of denial, he had given up and accepted it. There were worse people to like…maybe…

"Listy?"

Lister looked up. "R-Rimmer?" His eyes widened and then traveled to the hand resting on his shoulder.

"You…er…wanna…um…dance?" The older man looked adorably shy in Lister's eyes.

"…." His mind was reeling This was Rimmer, Arnold Rimmer asking him to dance.

"Not cos I like you or anything…" Rimmer said defensively. "You just look lonely, you gimboid."

"Calm down, will ya?" Lister chuckled. " 'Course I will, don't look so shocked about it, you asked, no backing out now!" He stood up and pulled the stunned Rimmer out onto the dance floor.

"You smeg-head," the hologram muttered, putting his arms around Lister's waist. Lister reached up and wrapped his arms around Rimmer's neck. He was pleasantly surprised to discover how lifelike and warm Rimmer's skin was.

"Goal-post head." He replied, letting everything but Rimmer slip away from his current state of reality. He hardly even heard the song, all he saw, heard, felt was Rimmer.

The hologram smiled softly at the other man, proud of what he did.

"Rimmer?" Lister asked once the song had ended.

"Hm?"

"Thanks." He kissed Rimmer and slowly pulled away. "See you around, Rimsy." He left the other man standing there in the middle of the floor with a smile on his face.

"You're welcome…" the hologram murmered, watching him leave.