Jake pressed his warm cheek against the top of my hair.

If I turned my face to the side-if I pressed my lips against his bare shoulder... I knew without

any doubt what would follow. It would be very easy. There would be no need for

explanations tonight.

But could I do it? Could I betray my absent heart to save my pathetic life?

Butterflies assaulted my stomach as I thought of turning my head.

And then, as clearly as if I were in immediate danger, Edward's velvet voice whispered in my

ear.

"Be happy," he told me.

I froze.

Jacob felt me stiffen and released me automatically, reaching for the door.

Wait, I wanted to say. Just a minute. But I was still locked in place, listening to the echo of

Edward's voice in my head.

Storm-cooled air blew through the cab of the truck.

"Let's get you inside Bells," Jake held his hand out for me glumly.

"Okay," I whispered, I had lost my chance. For now.

We made it to the front door and had locked ourselves inside within moments.

"We're going to stay inside while the pack tries to find Victoria, I will be here to bodyguard you if she tries to show up here," Jake said quietly.

I nodded and went to the kitchen for some leftovers. Tuesday's casserole was in the fridge and would easily feed both of us. I pulled it out and started heating it in the oven before grabbing a large glass of ice water. My throat was still burning a bit and slightly raw, but I figured that would go away with a little bit of time and rest. I put a couple of plates on the table and silver wear before turning to look at Jacob, fully, for the first time since I walked in the door. He was standing awkwardly by the counter like he didn't know what to do with himself or what to say.

"What's wrong, Jake?"

"Nothing, Bells," He answered automatically, with a hollow look in his eyes.

I could feel the tension in the room, he was giving up. My Jake was giving up on me, I could feel it. I excused myself and raced upstairs to the bathroom. I gripped the sides of the sink and tried to breathe evenly, I didn't want my Jacob seeing me cry. It took me a moment to realize that seeing him starting to give up on me was breaking my heart. I leaned against the wall and slid to the floor as I fought the tears, I lost. I couldn't keep them from coming. It took less than a minute for me to get mad. I was tired of being weak little Isabella Swan. No more. I was done. I wiped furiously at my eyes to rid my face of tears because that's what I was, furious. I was upset about the way I had been acting and feeling since the Cullen's had left but now I was going to do something about it. I stood up and looked in the mirror. I needed to clean up but that was going to take more time.

"Jake," I cracked the door, "Can you watch the casserole, the timer is on the stove, I need a shower," my voice was doing a little better.

"Sure, sure." Jake agreed

I started the water and stepped in as soon as it was hot. I decided this shower was going to be symbolic, I was going to wash away all of the loneliness I had allowed myself to feel, all of the despair, anger, regret, and, most of all, the inadequacy. I started from the bottom and went up scrubbing, shaving, shampooing, and conditioning. While thinking over what all my day had consisted of.

I had grown tired of waiting for Jacob to take me cliff diving and decided I would go by myself. I parked my truck and stumbled my way through the trees to the forest. When I finally came out I was at the very top of the cliff, I had intended to jump from lower down, it was the smarter reckless thing to do. I didn't want to try to find my way back down but then I started thinking of Charlie and what would happen if I jumped from here and actually got hurt. What about my Jacob? Would he miss me? Of course, he would, I couldn't do that to him after everything we had been through, mostly what he had been through. He was my own personal sun and I needed to try to be something for him. I didn't have a claim to Jake, yet I wanted one. Sure, he was my best friend, but he was better than any other best friend I had ever had. I stood at the edge making up my mind before taking a few steps back. I turned around and walked away. I stumbled through the trees again looking for the path that would lead me to the jump further down. When I finally found it, I stood at the edge for a moment contemplating if I could really jump by myself. I realized, when I hesitated, that I was, really, only wanting to jump with Jacob, he made me feel safer when I did crazy things. Looking back on the last several months I realized that I always felt safe with Jake around, because he was around, and I knew he would always protect me. I sighed heavily and decided I would come back when Jacob could, too. I backed up and turned around to go back to my truck and ran into something solid. I gasped before looking up to see Jacob.

"What do you think you are doing?" He had asked me

"I wanted to jump but I couldn't do it without you," I had told him.

"That's the smarter move," He had smirked at me. "Are you ready?" He held his hand out to me.

I didn't even take a moment to think. I just grabbed Jake's hand. We took a running start, Jake tried to stop at the last second but there was no way to do so. My human senses were slower and less keen than his, I didn't know the danger that was, suddenly, lurking below. As we plummeted towards the water Jake phased on the fly and let out a howl. I knew something was wrong and I panicked. When I hit the water, I sucked in a lungful of water. Jake nudged me a couple times until I got the hint, and I grabbed on to his back. By the time we surfaced, Jake was almost back at the shore and the pack was in sight. I turned, coughing, to see Victoria out in the water. We locked eyes and my stomach dropped. The last thing I wanted was for my boys to be out in the water with a monster that didn't need to breathe. If I hadn't already been choking on the water I had inhaled I would have been choking on air. The pack surrounded me and moments later they were heading Victoria off when she tried to come in to shore. Jake was off like a rocket, with me still holding on to his back. When we got to my truck he put me in the driver's side and crawled in behind me, before driving me home.

When I stepped out I felt better already, to the point I even remembered to put on an after-shower lotion. I stepped into my room and found a pair of pink and gray plaid pajama bottoms with a matching gray V-neck and put it on. I was going to start putting effort back into life starting from the time I stepped in the shower on. I might be wearing pajamas, but they were cute, and I didn't look homeless anymore. I could smell the casserole on the way to the kitchen and my stomach knotted with hunger.

"Took you long enough," Jake said before turning around in his seat.

"I know, I was giving myself time to clear my head. I needed to lose some baggage and I think I've finally washed it away." I finally felt like I could breathe properly, for the first time in months. "If you want to grab a shower I can find you some clothes for after," I offered.

"No worries, Bells, one of the boys are going to stop by with a bag for me any minute."

Jake seemed to be trying to be himself, but he was still off. I sat down and ate a small portion while Jake finished eating and when we were done I started cleaning up. While I was recovering the casserole, there was a loud knock. I spun quickly to look at Jake.

"Hey, it's me, Quil."

"I'm coming," Jake called to him on his way to let him in. Jake closed the door quickly behind him. "Thanks for bringing me some stuff, I appreciate it."

"Just know I wasn't the one who packed it," Quil barked with laughter.

"What's that insinuating?" Jake asked.

"Nothing, just don't blame me. I better hurry up and get back out there, we've caught her scent a couple more times, I think we're closing in on her. I'll see you later, if you need anything just phase and let us know, we'll call if we need to let you know anything," Quill waved and headed out

"I'm gonna go ahead and grab a shower if you're okay with that?" Jake looked at me.

"Yeah, I know you will keep an ear out for me."

I tried to act like I wasn't worried, like being alone didn't terrify me, like I really was a 'new' Bella.

"I will, I'll be quick, though," Jake promised me.

"I'll hold you to it."

I smiled, a real smile, not one of those half-arsed ones that I had been forcing but a genuine, reaching up to my eyes, smile. I was glad to know that Jake was willing to cut a relaxing shower short just to help keep me calm. Jake took his duffle bag and climbed the stairs as I put the casserole on the stove, in case Charlie came home while it was still warm. When I turned to see the empty kitchen, my smile faltered a bit, I was still scared that Victoria would show up unannounced and unwelcomed. I checked the doors, they were locked. I took deep breaths and paced, put my hands up in the air and reached down to touch my toes, I tried to recite Shakespeare in my head. I was still nervous. I picked out a movie and got it ready, when Jake was done with his shower he wasn't going to leave my sight again. I went upstairs and pulled all my pillows out of my room and tossed them down the stairs, my comforter went next along with a few other blankets the I could find. I heard the water shut off as I was heading back downstairs. By the time I moved the coffee table out of the way, pulled the cushions off the couch, and set up a large pallet on the floor, I could hear Jacob thudding down the stairs. My breath caught, he was beautiful. I couldn't help staring at him and realized he looked rather disgruntled.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Nothing," he growled back.

"Jacob Black, don't you dare speak to me like that," I warned him with my hands. Instantly, on my hips.

"I think they purposefully packed clothes that don't fit or match," he sighed running a hand down his face.

"Why would they do that?" I asked skeptically.

"No telling, Quil did tell me not to blame him, remember?"

"What do you have that fits?"

"The shorts I'm wearing," Jake tugged on them.

"What about what doesn't match?" I raised my eyebrow.

"I have one shirt that is purple that was only a little too small but I haven't worn it since I phased, the first time, so it probably doesn't fit at all now that I think of it," Jake mused.

"So, you're saying that you're annoyed at them packing clothes that don't fit even though you're the one keeping them in your room?" Maybe I was nagging but maybe I was being a stronger Bella as well.

"I've been throwing all of my old clothes in a box in the corner as I come across what doesn't fit, it's labeled 'too small' half of the clothes they packed were from that box," Jacob protested.

"Are you sure?"
"Positive."

"Then I guess you'll have to figure out why they did that and get even if you need to," I told him. "For now, we have a movie to watch, though."

I was, actually, a bit nervous, Jake was gorgeous, not wearing a shirt and fixing to be sitting beside me in the dark, under a blanket. I knew my feelings weren't exactly where Jakes were but the more I let my mind clear of Edward the more I realized that This man, in front of me, could very well make me happy and could be my future. Earlier, at First Beach, I had even thought of the pack as 'my boys' I could feel my face flush a bit at the other thoughts flowing through my head. Jacob cocked his head to the side and I froze, my heart dropped, and my breath caught. Was Victoria outside, was the pack safe? My eyes searched quickly to meet Jake's and I stopped breathing for a moment.

"Are you okay?" Jake asked me.

"What?"

"Are you okay, your heart is beating irradicably," Jake told me.

"I thought you were listening for Victoria or something," I breathed an audible sigh of relief before realizing that he heard my heart speed up when I had been thinking about him without his shirt on.

"No, I just heard your heart speed up and was trying to make sure you were okay. Are you sure you don't need to see a doctor?"

"I'm sure," I reassured him quickly. "I'm fine, really."
"What about some pain medicine for your throat, it will help you sleep," Jake was persistent.

"If it will make you feel better." I conceded rolling my eyes.

"Don't you roll your eyes at me, young lady," Jake growled at me.

I couldn't help the laugh that bubbled out, but it quickly turned to a strangled groan when pain

surged through my throat. I grabbed my throat to no avail. Closing my eyes, I really focused on not moving or swallowing so the pain could recede. It really wasn't as bad as it could be but breathing in salt water still hurt. Jake grabbed me and held me to his chest, tucking me under his chin.

"Is there something for you to take in the cabinet upstairs?" he asked quietly.

When I nodded Jake let me go and told me to go get whatever I wanted, and he would make us something to drink. I rummaged through the cabinet until I found something that I thought would work and headed back downstairs. Jacob was in the process of making hot tea on the stove, in a pot.

"I couldn't find a kettle," Jake smiled, holding his arms out for me to come to him.

"We don't have one," I told him snuggling into his chest.

"I make it in a pot at home, anyway," Jake squeezed me tightly against him and kissed the top of my head.

When the tea was boiled, Jake poured some into two mugs and added honey to them before carrying them to the living room and putting them on the coffee table to cool off a bit. I sat down leaving room for him to sit by the coffee table. When I was snuggled in and comfortable Jake shut off the living room light and sat down beside me putting his arm on the couch around me. I could see him because the kitchen light was still on, he had a small smile playing at his lips like he was glad to be here, but it still looked a bit plastered on. I grabbed the remote and started the movie waiting for Jake to catch the joke. It didn't take long for him to realize that 'Blood and Chocolate' was put in for a laugh.

"Are you really going to make me watch this?" Jake asked, laughing.

"I mean you could pick something else, if you like, if you think you could do better," I told him.

"I can," Jake promised.

A few minutes later Jake was putting a different movie before he came and sat back by me, pulling me into him, relaxing back into his old habits. He skipped through the trailers and started the movie. He had gone with one that was a bit newer, Herbie, of course, he would pick a movie about a car. I couldn't help the smile that played over my face.

I leaned back on the pillows and scooted down until I was mostly comfortable. I kept stealing glances at Jake to make sure he was okay. I didn't think he noticed but less than halfway through the movie he moved his arm from behind me and pulled me to his chest. I held him back and breathed him in. It was a bit weird to smell my soap on him, but I could still smell my Jacob underneath.

I woke up to a loud thud, the credits were playing so I couldn't have been asleep too long.

"Jake, Charlie's home," I reached out to shake him.

"Yeah," Jake said looking around.

"Jake?" I could hear my pitch getting high. "Is something wrong?"

"Just relax for a momen-" Jake was cut off by a large crashing sound.

I jumped and grabbed Jake, practically crawling onto his lap. It sounded like a car had plowed into a tree. I couldn't help being scared, not knowing what was going on.

"Jake, is Victoria out there?" I asked, not sure I really wanted the answer.

"Yeah, she is."

"Where's Charlie?" I don't really know why I expected him to know.

"Bells, I'm gonna have to phase but these are my only shorts. Either turn around or don't but you've been warned."

I turned around for a moment before I could feel Jake nudge me with his nose.

"Do you know if Charlie is alright?" I asked. Jake nodded. "Are they close to getting her?" Jake bounced his head from his left shoulder to his right. "Does that mean kind of?" He nodded. "Will we know if they catc-"

There was what could only be described as a loud metal on metal screeching sound and another huge, ground shaking crash. Jake cocked his head to the side and froze. I didn't know what to do so I just threw the cushions back onto the couch and sat down quietly out of the way, while I watched Jake. He seemed to stop breathing for a moment before suddenly he was phasing back to his human form. I closed my eyes quickly and slapped my hand over my eyes so that I wouldn't get any ideas about peaking.

"What's going on, Jacob?"

"You can look, I need a lighter!" Jake sounded jubilant and I hardly wanted to even consider that they could have actually caught Victoria. All the same, I jumped up and ran to get all of the lighters I could find.

"Quil will be here in just a moment to get these," Jake told me with a huge grin.

"Don't look too excited, something could happen," I didn't want to be a negative Nancy, I wanted to be a positive Patty, but I couldn't get my hopes up for when something went wrong. Something always went wrong.

Quil knocked and Jake went to hand him the lighters. It was less than five minutes later when Quil was back to tell us that she was gone. Victoria was finally dead.

I went numb, the world was spinning, and I felt like I was going to fly off. I felt my shaky knees giving out and started to fall to the floor as my vision went black. I opened my eyes feeling warm and fuzzy, I was laying on the couch and I could feel Jake holding my hand as he told Quil to fill my mug up with tea and throw it in the microwave to heat it back up, quickly. I tightened my grip to let him know that I was awake. When he turned to me I pulled him down into a hug.

"Please, tell me that wasn't just a dream," I begged him quietly.

"It wasn't, Bells, she's gone, you don't have to worry about her anymore," He squeezed me tightly. "Why are you crying?"

"I'm so relieved but I'm also really sad because you don't have any reason to be here, anymore."

"What are you talking about, I have every reason to be here, Bells," Jake looked angry

"What about tonight?" I asked him.

"I don't know, what about it?" Jake looked genuinely confused.

"You've looked like you haven't wanted to be here, tonight, I thought you were giving up on me."

"I'm sorry Bells, I was torn. I wanted to be out there hunting but I also didn't want to leave you. I wanted to be the one to personally protect you because I know that I would give my life for you without a second thought, but I also wanted to be the one to finally kill her, I settled for both. I got to be the one to watch you and I got to hand the lighters to Quil, without them it wouldn't have been possible to kill her. Which means we were actually able to kill her all because of you," Jacob smiled his bright, sunny, smile and it put me at ease. "I will never give up on you, Bells."

"Jake, you know you're my Jacob, right?"

"Always, Bells, you can't get rid of me," Jacob told me, wiping my tears away.

"We have a bit of a mess outside that we need to get started on," Quil said coming into the living room. "There are a couple of things that can't wait."

"What could be that bad?" I asked getting up to go look out in the dark. I couldn't see anything with the porch light so I went and got a spotlight. My truck looked like it might be ruined. There was a huge dent in one side and the other side was shoved into a tree.

"I really don't see a way of hiding this from Charlie," Sam came up behind us.

"What if we say we heard something and I came out to find this?" I asked. "Do you think he would believe it was a hit and run? We would have to make ruts up to it and then away from it like someone hit it and then backed out and left. I mean it's not really dented that bad so it'll probably be fine and it looks like she only broke one window. So it could be kinda feasible, I think…" I trailed off when everyone was gapping at me. "Never mind that was apparently stupid," I conceded.

"No, Bella, I think that's a perfect excuse, the dent on this side is big enough that it could have been a vehicle and it slid like it would have if it had gotten hit. I will be right back with a vehicle to make the marks, I know someone," Sam took off at a sprint.

"I think we should get a few vehicles from the res here, I'll call Emily and have her bring Sam's truck over so that it'll look like we're trying to fix it by the time Charlie gets here," Jacob told me.

A few minutes later he was hanging up and Sam was already back with a Truck to make the marks. In less than a minute he was done and said that he was going to return the truck after running through a carwash.

"Emily is on her way and she heard that Charlie should be headed this way before too much longer,"

"I think I'm going to start some homemade Chicken noodle soup, real fast," I told him. "We can all head inside until Emily gets here. Don't forget your shoes at the door," I told them as I raced to get an old, brown, towel to leave the muddy shoes on.

It wasn't long before I had a house full of people and the kitchen started smelling like soup. Soon, Emily and Sam showed up. Emily hung out in the kitchen with me for a bit before Jacob came in to join us.

"Just the person I was looking for, Jake I need to talk to you," Sam came in.

"What's up?"

"Do you want to go outside for a moment?" Same asked him.

"If that would make you more comfortable," Jake said.

"Is everything alright?" I asked Emily after the boys went out on the porch to talk.

"Yeah, I think so," Emily smiled.

After a few minutes, Charlie's headlights flashed across the kitchen window as he pulled in the drive. I was suddenly a bit nervous about if the plan would work or not. Emily gave me a reassuring smile.

"What the heck happened to Bella's truck!" Charlie was having a rough day and it was already showing the kind of stress he was under.

"Hey dad, someone did a hit and run, Jake and I heard it and went out and found it. Sam and the boys are gonna get it pulled off the tree and we'll see what we can do later."

"And what was Jake doing over here?" Charlie growled.

"I was gonna stay over until you got home, just in case. I don't like the idea of her being here by herself at night with the stuff that's been going on, lately," Jacob answered quickly.

"Thanks, Jake, I expect you to buy a few shirts if you're gonna be around here, though," Charlie halfway grinned.

"Alright, Chief."

I was stirring the soup and couldn't help the snort that escaped me.

"Supper's ready," I called before anything else could be added.

Emily had set out all of the bowls we would need so I filled them up and handed them to Emily one at a time to pass out to Charlie and the boys. By the time Emily and I sat down at the table with Charlie, the boys were finishing up.

"Just throw the bowls in the sink and I will wash them later," I told them.

"We're gonna get that truck out and then we'll see what to do from there," Sam told me.

"Sounds good, I appreciate all of the help."

"I swear, I've never seen boys eat so fast," Charlie laughed half-heartedly.

"They're always like that, you should see them when they invade my house, I've never seen so much food disappear so fast," Emily said fondly.

"I think I'll go help them out and see what we need to do," Charlie had finished eating.

"No, you won't, head up and get a shower if you need one and get to bed. I'm sure once it's off the tree we'll probably just leave it for the morning. You need to get some rest."

"I'll go grab a shower and then come back and check on you again," Charlie gave in.

By the time Charlie had finished his shower the boys were coming back in, they had moved the truck and put a tarp over it. In case it rained, they didn't want to risk it having a leak.

"I'm gonna head to bed Bella, don't stay up too late."

"I won't, goodnight, I love you, dad," I never told him I love him, or called him dad, but I decided that I needed to start. He had been doing more for me than almost anyone else in my life.

"Goodnight, I love you, too, Bella."

I turned back to the dishes and was surprised to see a pair of russet-colored hands grabbing bowls to rinse.

"Thanks, Jake," I leaned my head against his arm for a second before I continued washing.

"We're gonna head out and we'll come back in the morning to see what we can do," Sam came up behind me and gave me a one-armed side-hug before turning to leave.

"I'll walk you all out, I want to see the truck, anyway," I handed Jake the last bowl before drying my hands. I handed the towel to Jake before grabbing my jacket and following Sam. It really wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be, I would need to find one window to replace and then we would have to make sure the dents hadn't affected the frame, but my tank still looked alright. "I think my baby will still be okay."

Jake walked over and slung an arm around me while looking at the truck.

"I think you're right, I think we'll get her fixed for you."

I looked up while Jake was talking and smiled at him.

"I'd appreciate it, I love this truck and want her to last."

"Uh huh," Jake hummed.

"I guess I should let you all go, I'll fix breakfast in the morning, just call when you're leaving, and I'll start it then," I gave Emily, Quil and Embry hugs before waving at all of the others and thanking them for everything. "I'll see you in the morning, Jake," I turned to give him a hug and realized he looked a bit odd. "Are you feeling okay, Jake?"

"Yeah…" He drew it out

"Jacob, I feel like something is wrong," I grabbed his arm.

"Emily, take everyone home, I'll meet you at the house," Sam opened the door to his truck and grabbed something before kissing Emily goodbye. Moments later Sam was pushing something at Jake. It was a shirt. "Put this on, we need to have a talk."

Jake didn't say anything before putting the shirt on.

"What's wrong, Sam?" I asked nervously.

"Nothing is really wrong, I think, I guess that depends on your perspective. I took Jake outside earlier, I told him, now that Victoria is gone, that I am stepping down as Alpha. Emily Just found out she's pregnant and I have other things that I need to worry about now."

"That's amazing Sam! Congratulations."

"Thank you. What I am trying to tell you is that Jacob is now the alpha, he should have been the rightful alpha, all along, the only reason he didn't take the position is age. I just happened to be older and he didn't want it. I'll be here to help but I'm trying to focus on my family, now. Since Jake came in from our talk when was the first time you looked him in the eyes?"

"I really don't know," I said thinking about it. "I was cooking, served the soup, sat down when you guys went out to the truck, did the dishes…. I didn't look then… Then, I came out here and… Sam, you're not saying what I think you're saying are you?" My voice was rising.

"I am, I think now that Jake is the Alpha, the full wolf that he's supposed to be, I think he imprinted on you."