----------------------------------------------------------------------
TITLE: An Empty Mind
AUTHOR: Nadia Frey (driver@natakucar.net)
SERIES: Saiyuki (Minekura Kazuya)
DISCLAIMER: All materials are property of their creators, and are
used without permission for no profit. No offence or
infringement intended.
WARNINGS: Yaoi, Kougaiji/Sanzo. NC. Citrus. (Rated R)
ARCHIVE: Chuuburu no Anime, GSFA, FFNet
QUICK DESCRIPTION: Abstract Smutfic featuring a brainwashed Kougaiji.
NOTES: Spoiler warning: You've have to have read through, what is
it, Volume 8 of the manga. Roughly.
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An empty mind.
A cold, white room filled with a piercing light, bright enough to
blind my sight and blind my soul. Not a warm light; a cold, hard
pillar of pain that fills the room, fills my mind, pushing out
thoughts and memories and leaving nothing but cool, smooth walls on
all sides.
Not even loved ones - my most beloved, my most precious, my most
coveted - could breech these walls. I see them like the ghosts of
strangers, passing by outside with saddened and faraway looks. Why
should I be surprised that my enemy could not enter either? Even as I
clipped my fist towards his chin, and my eyes saw him hit the ground
in pain, the room remained empty. In fact, the void seems to grow, the
light becoming stronger.
I feel my arms move on their own, sliding each finger under warm
leather. The muscles underneath are tense, twitching and resisting.
My weight pins him down, and like a trained soldier I go through the
movements, coldly staring into the face of heat and passion and anger,
and like a machine I find my rhythm, living to move and functioning
without personal purpose, over and over, until the blue-hot
electricity is there to tell me I'm here and I'm alive.
Perhaps I did it to open the door to the room.
But even as the blue and the sparks in my vision fade, a part of me
realizes that he is like me - his body is no longer his own.
And after all, the light has only grown more intense, flooding my mind
and soul, overflowing into the base of my heart - it cries, but the
sound is drowned in silence under wave after wave of bright beautiful
light.
My nose twitches as it fills the smell of blood and chilled sweat. In
my ears is the sound of a pant, a whimper, and a cry. In my skin
tingles a cold from the salty drips sliding down what were once my
cheeks.
And in my mind is a cold, white, and empty room.
- Fin -
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TYPED: March 5, 2003. fnord.
TITLE: An Empty Mind
AUTHOR: Nadia Frey (driver@natakucar.net)
SERIES: Saiyuki (Minekura Kazuya)
DISCLAIMER: All materials are property of their creators, and are
used without permission for no profit. No offence or
infringement intended.
WARNINGS: Yaoi, Kougaiji/Sanzo. NC. Citrus. (Rated R)
ARCHIVE: Chuuburu no Anime, GSFA, FFNet
QUICK DESCRIPTION: Abstract Smutfic featuring a brainwashed Kougaiji.
NOTES: Spoiler warning: You've have to have read through, what is
it, Volume 8 of the manga. Roughly.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
An empty mind.
A cold, white room filled with a piercing light, bright enough to
blind my sight and blind my soul. Not a warm light; a cold, hard
pillar of pain that fills the room, fills my mind, pushing out
thoughts and memories and leaving nothing but cool, smooth walls on
all sides.
Not even loved ones - my most beloved, my most precious, my most
coveted - could breech these walls. I see them like the ghosts of
strangers, passing by outside with saddened and faraway looks. Why
should I be surprised that my enemy could not enter either? Even as I
clipped my fist towards his chin, and my eyes saw him hit the ground
in pain, the room remained empty. In fact, the void seems to grow, the
light becoming stronger.
I feel my arms move on their own, sliding each finger under warm
leather. The muscles underneath are tense, twitching and resisting.
My weight pins him down, and like a trained soldier I go through the
movements, coldly staring into the face of heat and passion and anger,
and like a machine I find my rhythm, living to move and functioning
without personal purpose, over and over, until the blue-hot
electricity is there to tell me I'm here and I'm alive.
Perhaps I did it to open the door to the room.
But even as the blue and the sparks in my vision fade, a part of me
realizes that he is like me - his body is no longer his own.
And after all, the light has only grown more intense, flooding my mind
and soul, overflowing into the base of my heart - it cries, but the
sound is drowned in silence under wave after wave of bright beautiful
light.
My nose twitches as it fills the smell of blood and chilled sweat. In
my ears is the sound of a pant, a whimper, and a cry. In my skin
tingles a cold from the salty drips sliding down what were once my
cheeks.
And in my mind is a cold, white, and empty room.
- Fin -
----------------------------------------------------------------------
TYPED: March 5, 2003. fnord.