Write-In
;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;
"You know that you're supposed to be the most popular write-in candidate, right?"
Steve Rogers promptly choked on his water, sputtering as he stared at the billionaire. "I'm what?"
Tony Stark nodded sagely, tipping back in his chair and setting his feet on the holotable, disrupting the projection of his newest suit. "Yup, preliminary polls suggest that you'll get the most write-in votes this election, coming in ahead of Mickey Mouse and Elvis Presley."
"Who's beating the King?" Clint demanded, coming through the door with the silent tread of a sneak thief and deftly stealing Stark's drink before the billionaire could react. He'd been gone for ten days on a SHIELD assignment, and his boots were still muddy.
"Steve is," Bruce answered for his friend, since Tony was too busy trying to get his mug back. "They're saying he and Mickey Mouse are supposed to be the two most popular write-in candidates during the upcoming election."
"But I'm not even running for office," Steve protested helplessly. "Why would they vote for me?"
Tony gave up on his drink with a regretful shrug and a dirty scowl at the oblivious archer. "Um, I don't know - because people under age thirty think you're cute, and people over age sixty grew up reading your comic books. Why wouldn't they vote for you?"
Natasha leaned over Clint's shoulder to sniff at the mug in his hand before straightening and eyeing it with distaste. "Ugh, Stark - that's strong enough to double as gasoline. And I think the better question is 'what kind of person would vote for Mickey Mouse instead of Steve Rogers?'"
"I would!" Clint blinked over the rim of his stolen mug. "Mickey Mouse is awesome," he concluded solemnly, taking a large gulp. Apparently the archer was either low on sleep or high on caffeine - or both.
"So nobody's voting for you, Stark?" Natasha teased, perching on the counter and snapping her bubble gum.
Tony eyed his former drink longingly. "I'm right behind Elvis," he admitted. "Which is fine, because I think Pepper might actually resign if I passed him. She's got this thing for old music."
Clint took another swallow. "I bet you'll vote for Steve," he decided, eyes twinkling over the edge of his mug. "Admit it, Stark. Uncle Sam wants you - to vote for Captain America."
Steve huffed a laugh at that, and even Bruce ducked his head and smiled. Tony remained surprisingly unruffled, lacing his fingers behind his neck and leaning back a little further.
"Nope," he announced, grinning. "Not voting for Cap. Or Mickey Mouse. Both too old for me."
"You are going to vote though, right?" Steve had that completely earnest Captain-America-wants-you-to-do-your-civil-duty look on his face.
"Of course I am." A wicked grin crept across the billionaire's face, and he shot a sideways glance at his best science buddy. "I'm going to write Bruce in."
Surprised eyes blinked wide open, and the doctor hesitated before going on with his work. "Tony, no."
"Tony, yes." Stark's expression was growing brighter and more interested as he thought about the topic. "You'd be great – patient, quiet, don't even need a bodyguard. Just what the doctor ordered."
"I already trashed half of New York - let me at the government and I'd probably break it too." Bruce frowned at a strand of DNA, obviously done with the conversation. Steve hid a smile against his fist, raising his eyebrows with interest.
Tony was incorrigible. "Government could use a little shaking up. We should spread the word. Your rage monster would be perfect." He spread his hands theatrically, framing an invisible sign in the air. "I can see the posters now: 'Smash the Opposition – Vote for Bruce Banner.'"
For a moment, Bruce honestly looked a little tempted. Perhaps it was the idea of being in charge of the forces who had so often tried to take him down. Then he shook his head wryly. "Not going to happen, Tony."
Clint interrupted the banter with a very loud snore. The archer had stretched out across one of the workbenches, hand still tight around the handle of his stolen mug. With a tolerant sigh Natasha pried it out of his fingers and patiently slung him over her shoulder in a fireman's carry, stalking toward the exit.
"Mmm," he mumbled in sleepy protest, and she shook her head in mock disgust.
"You're all children," she announced, stressing her Russian accent for all it was worth, and disappeared through the far door.
Steve still looked a little uncertain about the whole idea of people writing him in.
"I wouldn't mind running for a county level position sometime," he pointed out. "Maybe state, eventually. But it's a big responsibility, and I don't look old enough for anybody to take me seriously yet."
Tony snorted inelegantly.
"Believe me, Cap," he managed when he could speak again. "Your looks would not be a problem."
;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;
The topic didn't come up again, but that didn't mean anybody had forgotten about it. Three days later, a series of bright green 'Smash the Opposition - Vote for Bruce Banner' signs appeared in the Stark Tower elevators. Somebody else, possibly Clint, countered quickly by plastering up an opposing set of red, white and blue posters decorated with Steve's old USO publicity photographs. 'The Star Spangled Man - He Has a Plan!'
Steve laughed a little when he saw them. Bruce huffed with faint amusement and a good deal of embarrassment and then retreated to his lab.
The whole situation never would have made it out of the tower if someone - everybody suspected Natasha - hadn't secretly snapped a candid shot of Steve looking particularly good in a suit, standing beside one of the posters with an earnest expression on his face. She sent it to Maria Hill, who promptly circulated it around SHIELD's private email list as a joke.
Word was that Fury had actually smiled when he saw it, and everybody knew Phil Coulson had a copy taped to the inside of his office door – and set as his desktop background – and as his cell phone's lock screen.
;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;
"You do realize," Hill told Pepper one afternoon as they settled down for their weekly lunch meeting, "that if we leak that photo to social media, Steve could very well get elected through a write-in campaign? I could push the paperwork through, get him on the ballot before election day."
Pepper chewed her lip, clearly wavering. Maria grinned and flipped open her laptop, but then the CEO shook her head with a sigh.
"We can't," she pointed out. "He's still coming to grips with current political issues, and it wouldn't be fair to push him into it like that. Besides, he does his best work on a personal level, not necessarily a national one."
Reluctantly Maria gave in, pushing her computer away. Then she paused, fixing her friend with a calculating gaze. "But if he had you as his running mate…"
Pepper reached across the table and pulled her friend's computer further out of reach.
"No," she said firmly, and they both went back to their salads, pretending to ignore the clear temptation in Pepper's eyes.
"So," said Maria a half hour and much irrelevant conversation later, tucking a tip beneath the edge of her empty plate and brushing the crumbs off her skirt. "You're still sure you don't want to run? If you can handle Tony Stark, you can certainly take on a government, representatives, and an extremely patriotic super soldier with one hand tied behind your back."
Pepper hesitated for a very long minute, playing with her fork. When she looked up, her cheeks were pink.
"Not this year," she hedged. "We've got the big company merger to handle, and the new building is taking a lot of my time. But maybe - maybe some other year."
Maria nodded decidedly. "Good," she said. "Let's talk Steve into it - because if he ever runs for anything, I'd vote for him in a heartbeat."
Pepper tilted her head to the side and smiled a little, thinking of their humble friend with the enormous heart and strong convictions. "So would I," she agreed, and laid her fork down with a final click.
;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;
Sorry about this. I was working on my other stories and this just - happened. There's a very, very large part of me that loves the idea of Steve Rogers running for office with Pepper Potts as his running mate. :)
FYI: In America if you want to vote for somebody who isn't on the ballot, you can usually write their name in, depending on the rules of your state. Usually people write in folks they respect or candidates who have been eliminated earlier in the voting process, but there's always a couple jokers who decide to write in gag candidates.
By the way, please don't read this and go vote for Captain America or Mickey Mouse. Writing in a fictitious character is tough on the ballot counters, and I'd hate to think my story made their lives harder.
Voting is a privilege - exercise it conscientiously.
