Okay, um, this is my very first Dragon Ball Z fic. It might not be very funny to you, and it's a little weird, but it cracked me up. So, any ways...Girl Scout Cookies...I so must have had food on my mind...
Bulma and Vegeta's home
DING DONG!
Vegeta held his breath. The bell rang again. "Bulma, are you gonna get that?"
No answer.
"Dad, mom's out shopping!" Trunks yelled from another room.
Vegeta then smiled evily. "I'll get it then." His throwing skills had improved greatly since last time.
"Dad!" said Trunks; "Mom said you're not allowed to answer the door. Or the phone. Or have any contact with people at all."
"Your mother isn't here kid," Vegeta said, walking down the stairs. Trunks scurried along after him. "Why are you following me?"
"Er, no reason, so you won't er, kill anyone."
"It's not my fault if they can't survive, I don't fling them that far."
"I'm reminded of this book I'm reading called Matilda..."
DING DONG!
The doorbell rang for the last time. Vegeta opened the door, sadistic smirk on hand.
"HI, I'm Laci Macenzie, and I'm in Girl Scout Troop 111112! To support our trip to Mount Hamalugakaizesazu-
"What the Hell?" asked Vegeta.
"Don't say bad words, mommy says it isn't nice and you'll go to hell if you do!" she cautioned.
"Actually, I'm qualified for hell for murdering little brats like you who bother me!"
"Da-ad, you're making her cry!"
"Waaahhh! I went to the house of an evil demon who wants to kill me and now I'll never sell my goal of 2972 boxes and I just wanted to sell you some cookies and now I'll never get to go to Mount Hamalugakaizesazu-
"COOKIES?" yelled both Vegeta and Trunks.
"Let me see that," Vegeta said as he yanked the order form out of her hands.
Trunks watched his dad stare at the pictures of yummy cookies and practically salivate at the mouth. The Girl Scout handed Trunks a pen whispering "You might need this; Girl Scout Cookies have that kind of affect on people." Trunks handed the pen to Vegeta, who was sitting on the front stoop, mulling over all those cookie choices.
"Trunks, look at all those cookie choices," Vegeta whispered, completely mystified.
"Uh, yeah Dad."
"Let's see, we're gonna need a few of those, and some of those, and yeah, a couple of these things..." He began scribbling on the order form furiously.
"Just don't order too many Dad. I'm sure Mom has already ordered some and..." his voice trailed off as he saw the list.
"Gee, I hope Bulma won't be too mad," he said, trying to look innocent, and act which wasn't really working; "I only ordered a few boxes.
"Oh...er...Dad, can you give me the list?"
"Here." Then he directed his speech to the girl. "If we run out can we buy some more?"
"Uh, sure."
"You bought 153 boxes of Samoas?!?" yelled Trunks in shock.
"Yeah, I know it's not a lot. But the brat said we could by more in case we run out," Vegeta reassured him.
"Dad, you ordered 100 Thin Mints, 125 boxes of Tag Alongs, 118 All Abouts, 73 Trefoils, 103 Lemon Coolers, 17 Double Dutch, and...no Doci-Does? Are you prejudice against Doci-Does Dad?"
"OH NO, HOW COULD I BE?" Vegeta yelled in shock. He hurried to fix his mistake. "Give me the order form."
The smart part of Trunks told him not to do it, but the dumb side of him beat it out. "Here."
Vegeta took the form and scribbled a large sum on it, then feeling perfectly satisfied and totally unprejudiced to Girl Scout Cookies; he gave it back to the little girl.
"When do my cookies come in?" he barked towards her.
"Oh, uh, March 6th," she said, smiling her best smile. After all he had bought...a lot a lot of Girl Scout Cookies. But then again, what could you expect from the richest family in the world?
"They better be here by then, got that?"
"Y-yes sir."
He slammed the door shut and felt very pleased with himself. After all, in a few weeks, his cookies would come in. His stomach was growling just thinking about it.
"Dad, you signed the order form Bulma Briefs," Trunks commented; "She's gonna be so mad at you!"
"She's so dumb, she'll probably see her name on the form and think she ordered them herself," Vegeta said fondly.
At Laci Macenzie's house
"Laci honey, how was selling today?"
"I dunno Mommy, this guy yelled at me but then he ordered a lot a lot of Girl Scout Cookies. I couldn't count them all up, could you?"
Laci's Mommy just stared at the list in shock.
About, uh... three weeks later (the Briefs house)
The doorbell rang.
"Bulma, are you gonna get that?"
"Okay," she yelled as she hurried downstairs. "Lazy bum," she mummered under her breath.
She opened the door to see a smiley-faced little girl. And a truck with four people unloading cases of the Girl Scout cookies. "We brought your cases of cookies!" she said happily.
"Uh sweetie, I didn't order any cookies. The men in my house eat so much there's really no point."
"Yes, you did."
"No, I didn't."
"Yes, you did."
"No, I didn't." Bulma was starting to get very peeved. So was the happy-go- lucky Girl Scout.
"LOOK," said Laci, showing her the form; "Your name's right here."
Bulma looked. And screamed. "VEGEEEETAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" she yelled so half the block heard. "OH my gosh, I am going to kill him. I told him he wasn't allowed to answer the door." She sighed while the girl looked on. "Oh, how much do I owe you?"
"2367 dollars," she said
Bulma grimaced, and wrote out a check. "Here ya go."
"Thank you for supporting our Girl Scout trip to Mount Hamalugakaizesazu-
"Okay, whatever."
After the boxes of cookies had been lugged into her house, she began to think of a punishment for Vegeta.
And she thought.
And she thought.
And she thought.
And then... "Vegetaaaa!" bellowed Bulma; "get your ass down here now!"
About an hour and a half later Vegeta was downstairs (he had taken the long route) with Trunks closely in tow.
"Bulma, you needed me?"
"Yes Vegeta dear, I did."
Vegeta glanced around until his eyes fell upon the cases of cookies. "Oh shit."
"Vegeta you answered the door and bought cookies! When I told you no! How dare you! You will face..." she paused.
"W-what? What are you going to do?" he asked, terror in his voice.
"NO Bulma, you can't make me eat another box."
"Don't worry, you've only got 336 more boxes to go before you can call it quits for tonight."
"What did I do to deserve this?"
Okay, it's over. Fine it was a little boring, but the general idea's funny. Ah well. Adios, Apllo21.
Amen
Bulma and Vegeta's home
DING DONG!
Vegeta held his breath. The bell rang again. "Bulma, are you gonna get that?"
No answer.
"Dad, mom's out shopping!" Trunks yelled from another room.
Vegeta then smiled evily. "I'll get it then." His throwing skills had improved greatly since last time.
"Dad!" said Trunks; "Mom said you're not allowed to answer the door. Or the phone. Or have any contact with people at all."
"Your mother isn't here kid," Vegeta said, walking down the stairs. Trunks scurried along after him. "Why are you following me?"
"Er, no reason, so you won't er, kill anyone."
"It's not my fault if they can't survive, I don't fling them that far."
"I'm reminded of this book I'm reading called Matilda..."
DING DONG!
The doorbell rang for the last time. Vegeta opened the door, sadistic smirk on hand.
"HI, I'm Laci Macenzie, and I'm in Girl Scout Troop 111112! To support our trip to Mount Hamalugakaizesazu-
"What the Hell?" asked Vegeta.
"Don't say bad words, mommy says it isn't nice and you'll go to hell if you do!" she cautioned.
"Actually, I'm qualified for hell for murdering little brats like you who bother me!"
"Da-ad, you're making her cry!"
"Waaahhh! I went to the house of an evil demon who wants to kill me and now I'll never sell my goal of 2972 boxes and I just wanted to sell you some cookies and now I'll never get to go to Mount Hamalugakaizesazu-
"COOKIES?" yelled both Vegeta and Trunks.
"Let me see that," Vegeta said as he yanked the order form out of her hands.
Trunks watched his dad stare at the pictures of yummy cookies and practically salivate at the mouth. The Girl Scout handed Trunks a pen whispering "You might need this; Girl Scout Cookies have that kind of affect on people." Trunks handed the pen to Vegeta, who was sitting on the front stoop, mulling over all those cookie choices.
"Trunks, look at all those cookie choices," Vegeta whispered, completely mystified.
"Uh, yeah Dad."
"Let's see, we're gonna need a few of those, and some of those, and yeah, a couple of these things..." He began scribbling on the order form furiously.
"Just don't order too many Dad. I'm sure Mom has already ordered some and..." his voice trailed off as he saw the list.
"Gee, I hope Bulma won't be too mad," he said, trying to look innocent, and act which wasn't really working; "I only ordered a few boxes.
"Oh...er...Dad, can you give me the list?"
"Here." Then he directed his speech to the girl. "If we run out can we buy some more?"
"Uh, sure."
"You bought 153 boxes of Samoas?!?" yelled Trunks in shock.
"Yeah, I know it's not a lot. But the brat said we could by more in case we run out," Vegeta reassured him.
"Dad, you ordered 100 Thin Mints, 125 boxes of Tag Alongs, 118 All Abouts, 73 Trefoils, 103 Lemon Coolers, 17 Double Dutch, and...no Doci-Does? Are you prejudice against Doci-Does Dad?"
"OH NO, HOW COULD I BE?" Vegeta yelled in shock. He hurried to fix his mistake. "Give me the order form."
The smart part of Trunks told him not to do it, but the dumb side of him beat it out. "Here."
Vegeta took the form and scribbled a large sum on it, then feeling perfectly satisfied and totally unprejudiced to Girl Scout Cookies; he gave it back to the little girl.
"When do my cookies come in?" he barked towards her.
"Oh, uh, March 6th," she said, smiling her best smile. After all he had bought...a lot a lot of Girl Scout Cookies. But then again, what could you expect from the richest family in the world?
"They better be here by then, got that?"
"Y-yes sir."
He slammed the door shut and felt very pleased with himself. After all, in a few weeks, his cookies would come in. His stomach was growling just thinking about it.
"Dad, you signed the order form Bulma Briefs," Trunks commented; "She's gonna be so mad at you!"
"She's so dumb, she'll probably see her name on the form and think she ordered them herself," Vegeta said fondly.
At Laci Macenzie's house
"Laci honey, how was selling today?"
"I dunno Mommy, this guy yelled at me but then he ordered a lot a lot of Girl Scout Cookies. I couldn't count them all up, could you?"
Laci's Mommy just stared at the list in shock.
About, uh... three weeks later (the Briefs house)
The doorbell rang.
"Bulma, are you gonna get that?"
"Okay," she yelled as she hurried downstairs. "Lazy bum," she mummered under her breath.
She opened the door to see a smiley-faced little girl. And a truck with four people unloading cases of the Girl Scout cookies. "We brought your cases of cookies!" she said happily.
"Uh sweetie, I didn't order any cookies. The men in my house eat so much there's really no point."
"Yes, you did."
"No, I didn't."
"Yes, you did."
"No, I didn't." Bulma was starting to get very peeved. So was the happy-go- lucky Girl Scout.
"LOOK," said Laci, showing her the form; "Your name's right here."
Bulma looked. And screamed. "VEGEEEETAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" she yelled so half the block heard. "OH my gosh, I am going to kill him. I told him he wasn't allowed to answer the door." She sighed while the girl looked on. "Oh, how much do I owe you?"
"2367 dollars," she said
Bulma grimaced, and wrote out a check. "Here ya go."
"Thank you for supporting our Girl Scout trip to Mount Hamalugakaizesazu-
"Okay, whatever."
After the boxes of cookies had been lugged into her house, she began to think of a punishment for Vegeta.
And she thought.
And she thought.
And she thought.
And then... "Vegetaaaa!" bellowed Bulma; "get your ass down here now!"
About an hour and a half later Vegeta was downstairs (he had taken the long route) with Trunks closely in tow.
"Bulma, you needed me?"
"Yes Vegeta dear, I did."
Vegeta glanced around until his eyes fell upon the cases of cookies. "Oh shit."
"Vegeta you answered the door and bought cookies! When I told you no! How dare you! You will face..." she paused.
"W-what? What are you going to do?" he asked, terror in his voice.
"NO Bulma, you can't make me eat another box."
"Don't worry, you've only got 336 more boxes to go before you can call it quits for tonight."
"What did I do to deserve this?"
Okay, it's over. Fine it was a little boring, but the general idea's funny. Ah well. Adios, Apllo21.
Amen