With Wesley's cross scaring the vampire away, Cordelia's mind kicked into gear again.
"Willow," she says softly, her thoughts reeling.
Willow's dead.
Willow Rosenberg is dead.
Willow Rosenberg is dead and is now a vampire.
"They got Willow," she finishes lamely.
No matter how many times she thought about it, she just couldn't deal. Later, it would have to be later. She wasn't going to break down in front of Wesley. He was a classy enough guy, but not someone she felt comfortable with at all.
She'd deal with it later.
Clamping down hard on her emotions she turned to Wesley, plastering her bright and cheery mask on her face.
"So, are you doing anything tonight?"
As expected, he's shocked into silence, and then eventually says he'll be going to speak to Mr. Giles.
Cordelia puts on her disappointed mask and settles for having Wesley escort her to her car before she drives off home.
An hour later, she's laying in her bed staring miserably at the ceiling with tear-stained eyes. She'd stopped crying a while ago, but still it hurt to know that Willow was gone.
Sure Willow had taken Xander from her, but Cordelia could understand that. Since diapers it had been Willow and Xander, Cordelia had always known that eventually they'd get together.
Cordelia had been hurt and angry, but she was always planning on forgiving them both eventually. They were her friends even if Xander wasn't going to be her boyfriend.
But now she would never get a chance to tell Willow she'd forgiven her. The strange thing was that after her talk with the vampire tonight she had actually forgiven her. As Cordelia had ranted and raved at the redhead locked in the cage, she'd felt a weight being lifted from her. Getting it out of her system had been the final step.
As Cordelia thought about Willow and Xander, she was struck by how sorry she felt for him. Cordelia was hurting enough over Willow's death. Xander must nearly be destroyed.
She reached for the phone and dialled Xander's number.
"Harris Residence," came Xander's tired response.
"Xander?"
Cordelia could hear the surprise in Xander's voice, "Cordy is that you?"
"Yeah."
"Are you alright?" Xander couldn't imagine anything bad enough for Cordelia to phone him.
"That's what I was going to ask you," Cordelia replied. "I know about Willow, and I kind of figured that you'd be hurting and I wondered if maybe you wanted to talk."
Xander let out a small chuckle. Cordelia sat back in shock. "You're laughing? Willow's dead and you're laughing?"
"Willow's not dead."
"I saw…"
"You saw Evil Twin Willow. Our Willow's still alive, but there was a vampire that looked like her around as well."
"Thank God," Cordelia said in relief. Willow's still alive.
"How did you see her?" Xander asked surprised.
"She was at the library when I went there."
"Oh right, that's how she got out."
"I'm sorry, Xander. I just.. well.. it was Willow."
"Well it's all worked out now. Evil Twin Willow has gone now, back wherever she came from. There's only our Will left."
"Good," Cordelia said slowly. Now everything was right in the world again, she figured it was time to stop pandering to Xander. "In that case Xander. I'll say goodnight."
"Goodnight," Xander said sadly as Cordelia hung up. He hated the way that every now and again, Cordelia would remind him that she could actually be a nice person. That she'd remind him of what he'd thrown away.
Willow answered the phone groggily.
"Willow is that you?" Cordelia asked.
"Yeah, Cordy. What do you want?" Willow answered wearily. She couldn't cope with Cordelia at this time of night. Besides what was Cordelia phoning for anyway?
"Is that really you, not vamp you or anything?"
"Figures", Willow muttered. "Yeah, it's me. Vamp Willow has gone home."
"And you're okay?" Cordelia pressed.
Willow was surprised at the apparent sincere concern in Cordelia's voice.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Cordy what's wrong?"
"Nothing now, I was just checking you know. I met the other you tonight and I thought it was you and I thought you were dead and a vampire. Xander said there was another you around but I wanted to make sure."
"Okay," Willow answered slowly, still confused by why Cordelia actually cared.
"And I wanted to tell you that I forgive you for kissing Xander."
"What?"
"When I thought you'd died, I realised how much I missed having you as my friend. I didn't want to think that you'd gone and I never got a chance to forgive you. I was really hurt, but I didn't want it to end that way." Cordelia was nearly crying at the other end of the line.
"It's okay," Willow said soothingly. "I understand. I really am sorry about everything, and I'd love to be your friend again if you'd let me…"
"That would be good," Cordelia said quietly. "I've missed you."
"I missed you too. I'll see you at school tomorrow?" Willow's voice was hopeful.
"Sure. See you then. Goodnight Will."
"'Night Cordy," Willow answered before hanging up the phone.
Cordelia put down the handset and turned her gaze back to the ceiling. She'd come so close to losing one of her friends tonight. It had ended alright, but she knew that she couldn't count on it.
Tomorrow she'd have to start making peace with Buffy, and even with Xander.
The End.