Why?

By CharmedOneForever

Oneshot. Alternate ending to Charmed Again Part II.

Disclaimer: I do not now nor have I ever owned Charmed or any of it's characters.

A/N: This just came to me suddenly and I wrote it on the spur of the moment. I hope you like it :)

The music pounded in my ears as I smiled nervously at my new-found family. There was obviously still some awkwardness between us. None of us really knowing what to say to one another.

I was sitting in P3 with Piper and Phoebe. I'd only really meant to stop by briefly to thank them for saving my life that day but now I was sitting down next to Phoebe trying desperately to make small talk. A very tricky thing to do.

They'd recently lost their oldest sister in a battle with a demon and now here I was, their newly found little sister. I knew it must be a lot for them to handle and didn't want to intrude.

Phoebe leant forward slightly, looking curious, "Can I ask you a question?"

I nodded, "Mm-hmm…"

"Why did you come to Prue's funeral?"

Piper looked at me as Phoebe asked this, clearly curious about my answer. It was the first time this evening she actually looked interested by what I had to say.

"I mean, you never even met her, right?" Phoebe added. A fair question.

I shook my head, "No, I never did." I struggled to think of the best way to put this, "I don't want this to be taken the wrong way… but… I just feel that part of me lost her too." Phoebe smiled kindly giving me the confidence to carry on, "I just… I felt drawn to her. To all you guys. I guess it was just part of me trying to find out who I was."

I watched as Phoebe and Piper exchanged silent glances and my stomach curled itself up into a knot. What were they thinking? I tried my best to keep eye contact as Piper looked back at me.

"Come on. There's something we need to show you."

I smiled at her trying to push away the nervous feeling that was creeping up inside of me, "Show me what?"

"What good magic can do," Phoebe answered, pulling me to my feet.

Back at the manor, I stood and watched, feeling out of place as Phoebe lit a circle of candles and Piper thumbed through the Book of Shadows. I felt uneasy. I wasn't sure what was happening.

Phoebe stood and squeezed my arm reassuringly making me feel slightly better. She walked over to Piper and stood next to her leaving me stood on my own and feeling self conscious.

They both began to read a spell from the Book, "Hear these words, hear my cry, spirit from the other side. Come to me, I summon thee, cross now the great divide."

Before I could question what was happening, a swirl of white lights appeared in the middle of the circle of candles. They materialised into the ghostly form of a woman who I knew I had never met yet seemed so familiar.

"There's someone here we thought you should meet." I heard Phoebe say to the woman.

I watched as the woman's face turned from puzzlement to shock. She stepped forwards slightly, "Paige?"

It clicked.

My face must have mirrored hers as my eyes welled up with tears and I whispered, "Mom?"

She stepped out of the circle and her body solidified. She opened her arms to me but I did the one thing I never thought I'd do. I stepped away from her and shook my head slightly, "No…"

She couldn't have looked more hurt if she'd tried and my heart felt like it was breaking into a thousand tiny pieces. She tried again to embrace me but I shook my head and took another couple of steps back, trying desperately to swallow the lump in my throat. I wouldn't cry. Not in front of them all.

"Paige? What's wrong?" I heard Phoebe ask but her voice seemed so far away.

Our Mom looked concerned and upset, "I'm so sorry, honey."

"Why?" I managed to croak out. I mentally kicked myself for not keeping my emotions in check.

She shook her head sadly, "We had no choice."

"Didn't you want me?" My voice was thick with tears and I swallowed again trying to stay in control.

"More than anything. If we could have kept you we would have but we were afraid of what the Elders might do."

"Wasn't I worth the risk? Couldn't you have tried fighting for me?"

She opened her mouth to speak and I inwardly pleaded with her. Begged her to say something. Anything. If she could just reason with me. Explain why I had to grow up not knowing who I was or where I came from. If she could just try then I would forgive everything there and then. She closed her mouth and shook her head sadly.

Blinded by the tears that were threatening to fall, I stumbled out of the attic and made my way clumsily down the stairs. I could hear Phoebe calling my name but didn't stop.

Staggering out of the front door I half ran to my car that was parked out front and got in, slamming my door and pushing the lock down with my elbow. I revved the engine and screeched off into the night.

I shivered slightly as I sat on the grassy bank staring up at the stars, the thin material of my dress doing little to protect me from the cool night. I remembered back to when my parents and I used to picnic here and felt a pang of longing for them. What I wouldn't give to be in their arms now.

I pulled my knees up to my chin and rested my arms on top, seeing goose pimples slowly rising up over my skin. I could feel a cold dampness soaking into my dress but I didn't care. My mind was spinning from the events of the day. It had certainly been an interesting one.

I thought back to what had happened in the attic. I hadn't meant to run out like that. I was just so overwhelmed with everything. Why couldn't she have said something? All I wanted was a valid reason for why they gave me up. Okay, so they were worried about the Elders but I was their daughter. They should have fought for me.

I could feel the tears starting to well up again and brushed them away stubbornly. My chest burned with the need to cry but I refused to let myself. If I broke down now then I'd never be able to stop.

A flash of headlights caught my attention as a car slowly pulled up next to where I'd parked mine. I looked away and rested my chin on my arms knowing that I should have expected it really.

Phoebe clambered out of the car, holding her dress off the floor slightly and making her way over to me quickly. She looked concerned and it was killing me. I couldn't take their pity right now. Piper climbed out of the drivers side and walked towards me slowly. I couldn't read her expression.

As Phoebe reached me, she knelt down and brushed my hair back away from my face, "We were so worried. Are you okay?"

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak.

"I'm so sorry, Paige. We should have thought it through. It wasn't fair to thrust her on you like that."

"It's okay. Honestly. I shouldn't have been so melodramatic."

Phoebe shook her head and took my hand in hers, "You weren't being melodramatic at all. You had a lifetimes worth of hurt and confusion suddenly thrown at you. We should have been more considerate."

Piper had finally reached us now and stood a little way away watching us silently.

"How did you find me?"

"Ah, that'd be telling," Phoebe said with a smile but when I looked at her she could tell that I wasn't in the mood to be playing games, "We scryed for you."

"I didn't mean to run off like that. I'm sorry."

She shook her head again and squeezed my hand slightly, "You don't need to apologise at all. You did nothing wrong." She shifted position slightly so that she could drape her arm round my shoulders.

"I just don't understand. I get why she had to give me up. I really do. But why did they do it without a fight? Why couldn't they try to make it work?"

"I don't know sweetie. I wish I did."

"I lost years, Phoebe. Always wondering who my parents were and why they didn't want me. Always asking myself what I did that was so wrong," My voice wobbled a bit as the tears threatened to fall but this time I did nothing to stop them, "And then when I finally meet her…" I shook my head as the tears broke free and trickled down my face.

"I know," Phoebe whispered as she pulled me into a hug, "I know…"

"She loves you, Paige," Piper said unexpectedly making us both look up at her, "They had to make the hardest choice of their lives when they gave you up. I don't think any of us could ever imagine what they went through. But at the end of the day they did it to protect you. They had to lose you to save you. They never did it to hurt you."

I nodded miserably, "Yeah. I know. It's just hard."

Phoebe reached up and wiped my tears from my face gently, "Do you want to speak to Mom again?"

I thought about it for a minute and then reluctantly shook my head, "No." I knew they were disappointed with my answer. "I can't speak to her about it today. I'm too emotionally drained. I need some time to get my feelings together first. But I will. One day."

Phoebe nodded, accepting my answer and got to her feet with some difficulty. She offered me her hand, which I took gratefully, and helped me to my feet.

Piper stepped towards me and put her warm hand on my cold shoulder. She smiled at me. No words were needed.

A/N: Well, there you have it folks, I hope you liked it. Please leave a review either way even if it's to tell me how much it sucked. Bed time for me now, it's my little brother's 10th birthday today so I need all the sleep I can get!