A/N – It's been a week since the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary and my heart continues to ache and break a little more every day. This may be wildly inappropriate but as a mother, and a daughter, and a sister, and a wife I cannot even fathom what the victim's families are going through every day as they mourn the loss of their loved ones. So I write this as a memorial to them and will hopefully be able to deal with my own feelings.
Disclaimer: A sensitive topic that's real and evil and cuts and hurts – also, mentions of religion and prayer. – You have been warned.
Pairing – Klaus & Caroline
Summary: And I will shed twenty-six tears, and will light twenty-six candles, and I will never understand. / Caroline discusses evil with a man who disguises himself as the Devil.
and you're beautiful like diamonds in the sky
Caroline had arrived at The Grille early that morning to help set up for the fundraiser that would be occurring later on that night. It was eleven days before Christmas and she was starting to feel like everything was going to be perfect. Caroline was busy stringing up white lights around the bar when suddenly her attention got pulled to the flat screen TV that hung on the wall.
"We're receiving reports of a shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown CT…."
Caroline paused and took in a deep breath as Lester Holt gave the dreadful news and graphic details that were slowly being pieced together. Her body began to tremble as he spoke with different correspondents and psychologists as they tried to figure out why and how something like this could have happened. She felt bile rise up in her throat when they showed images of scared and crying little children being led out of a place they thought would always be safe. She wrapped her arms tightly around herself and nervously began picking at the thread of her cashmere sweater as she realized that their innocence had been ripped away from them and they would forever be shaped by this tragic event. Caroline didn't hear the jingle of the bell as someone entered The Grille and approached her carrying a large painting of a snowflake.
"Good morning Love. I thought I might find you here. Where would you like me to place this?" Klaus asked cheerfully, but Caroline didn't move, didn't blink, she just continued to stare at the TV. Klaus frowned slightly as he placed the painting on top of the bar and moved his eyes to the TV, noticing the large banner across the TV that read "Tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary."
"How could someone do this?" Caroline asked quietly, still not looking at Klaus. Klaus remained silent for a few moments as he stood next to Caroline and listened to the reports of the evil that struck a small town in Connecticut.
"There are many different kinds of evil in the world Caroline," Klaus said softly as he observed the weight of the tragedy lay heavily on her heart. He was a man who had been around for millennia, who had seen many faces of evil, who was often evil himself. But he realized as he looked at Caroline that even though she was destined to live an eternity she was still just a sheltered child who believed in good and love and miracles and peace.
"This is the worst kind," Caroline said thickly. Klaus nodded as he moved his eyes back to the TV.
"Yes it is," he said solemnly.
"It's so close to Christmas," Caroline said, her voice beginning to shake as a tear slipped down her cheek. "They were probably writing letters to Santa and decorating their Christmas trees, baking cookies…." Caroline took in a shaky breath as her words faded. Finally she turned and looked at Klaus. "Do you believe in Heaven and Hell?" she asked, her eyes pleading as she struggled to come to grip with the events that were unfolding before her.
"Yes," Klaus answered definitively as he looked into Caroline's eyes. Caroline nodded slightly as she wrapped her arms a little more tightly around herself.
"Hell is too kind of a place for that man," Caroline said bitterly, moving her eyes back to the TV. Klaus frowned as he began to lightly rub her back, feeling the softness of the cashmere against the roughness of his palm.
"It's ok to feel that way Caroline," he said softly. "And just as I believe there is a Hell there is also Heaven, and those children are in Heaven now. They're with God. They're at peace." Caroline felt more hot tears fall down her cheeks as Klaus' words rung true to her aching heart.
"They should be here, with their parents," Caroline choked out, the images on the TV becoming blurry as new tears threatened to escape. "How is it even fair? You and I, we'll be here forever, and they're gone, they barely lived at all."
"It's not fair," Klaus agreed as Caroline wiped the tears off of her flushed cheeks, her body aching with anger and grief. "Come with me Caroline," Klaus said softly but with conviction as he gently took her hand. "I want to show you something."
Caroline let Klaus lead her out of The Grille and down the eerily quiet Main Street. She could hear the snow crunch under their footsteps and she took a deep breath in, letting the cold crisp air fill her lungs until it hurt. She felt her tears freeze to her skin as the cold wind whipped around her, causing her hair to lose its curl while it flailed wildly around her face in what was now just a mess of waves. Klaus stopped when they reached the local church and squeezing her hand he asked Caroline, "Would you like to go in?" Caroline nodded and Klaus took her inside the old brick building, leading her down the long aisle until they were at the altar. Caroline kneeled and Klaus followed, keeping his head raised as Caroline bowed hers and honored the Holy Trinity, swiftly moving her fingers over her chest as she praised the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. After a brief pause Caroline slowly stood and moved to a large display of unlit vigil lights. Klaus once again followed silently and watched as Caroline lit two matches.
"Will you help me?" Caroline asked quietly. Klaus nodded as he took the offered match and silently they lit twenty-six candles. When they were finally done Caroline took in a shaky breath before beginning The Lord's Prayer. After a moment Klaus quietly joined in.
Our Father who art in Heaven,
Hallowed be thy name,
Thy Kingdom come,
Thy will be done on Earth, as it is in Heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
As we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from Evil:
For thine is the Kingdom,
And the power,
And the glory, Forever.
Amen
Caroline turned and smiled at Klaus who she had always thought was the Devil, but turned out to be more human than she had ever thought was possible.
"Thank you," she whispered quietly and Klaus once again took her hand.
"I'll take you home."
And on the trek home, Caroline looked up at the night sky, and noticed the stars, shining brighter than she had ever remembered before, and she thought quietly to herself that they looked like beautiful diamonds in the sky.