Visions
Undiluted schmaltz, including babyfic. Read with an insulin syringe at hand.
After several days at the Lake George cabin, Chakotay felt comfortable enough to settle himself at the end of the dock with his medicine bundle. There were other cabins on the lake, but the residents kept to themselves. It was possible to imagine that he was completely alone, suspended over the water. He closed his eyes, spoke the words of invocation, and allowed the vision to unfold. His animal guide was present but watchful, waiting. He heard approaching footsteps. The only person who had ever appeared to him in his meditations was his father, so he faced the sound with eagerness, waiting for the beloved face to appear around the large boulder that blocked his view.
The man who appeared was not his father. He was roughly the same age, but he wore closely trimmed gray hair over an obsolete Starfleet uniform. Chakotay had never met him, but there was only one person he could be, and the face was familiar from old photographs. His rank, at least, was obvious from the insignia.
"Admiral… Janeway?" he breathed.
"That's right, son." The older man stopped well short of Chakotay's position in the clearing and saluted.
Automatically, Chakotay snapped to attention and returned the salute. He let his hand fall slowly and looked around. His animal guide had hidden herself. He felt profoundly disoriented, something that had never happened to him in meditation. "Can I… help you?" he asked finally.
The admiral took in the scene, then looked Chakotay up and down as if inspecting troops. His face fell a little. "I always thought I'd be there to give my girls away," he said. "I understood the risks, but I wish I'd had longer."
Chakotay took in Janeway's expression of regret. It was hard to imagine Kathryn being someone's little girl, but here he was, her daddy. She spoke of him only rarely, but in tones of great fondness. "She was the most beautiful bride," he said, taking a small step toward his father-in-law.
"I know," Janeway answered with a small smile. "We can't see everything from the other side, but something of that importance… well, suffice it to say, I was there, right beside her."
"I'm glad to know that. She loved you very much," Chakotay said with a small smile, remembering the scene as Kathryn walked up the aisle on Tuvok's arm.
The admiral swallowed hard. "I love her. She will always be precious to me." He fixed Chakotay with the same glare Kathryn wielded so powerfully. Chakotay straightened unconsciously. "And she is precious to you too, I take it?"
Chakotay paused to find the words to satisfy this powerful spirit, who had come to find him across time, distance, and death. "She is my very heart and soul," he answered at last, in a low voice.
Janeway called off the glare and looked appeased. "She has something to tell you," he said.
"Something to tell me?" Chakotay replied, alarmed. "That you knew about first?" He looked around him, suddenly feeling a sense of urgency to leave his meditative state and return to Kathryn where she sat wrapped in a blanket on the couch back at the cabin, nursing some sort of flu. "Is she okay?"
"She's fine, fine," Janeway reassured, showing Chakotay his palms in a calming gesture. "I knew first because here on the other side, we meet the new souls before they enter your world. This one," Janeway showed his teeth to Chakotay for the first time, alarming the younger man further, only to collapse into ringing laughter, "this one will show you a good time. She's a fireball."
"New souls?" Chakotay repeated. "You mean that – " his words failed him as he stared at his deceased father-in-law, feeling dry-mouthed and a little dizzy. Even for a vision, this was surreal.
Janeway nodded. "That's right. She hasn't told you yet. If I know my Katie, she's convinced that this is the end of the world. She can face down any enemy, but she always overdramatizes the personal."
"That's for sure," Chakotay muttered. He glanced up at Janeway and was relieved that the admiral seemed not to have heard him.
"Go to her," Janeway ordered. "Tell her everything will be fine. And make her eat something."
Chakotay rubbed his face with both hands. "I will. I'll go right now."
The admiral fixed him with an appraising eye, one brow raised. "First, tell me how you feel about my grandchild. Be honest. I'll know if you're not."
Chakotay blinked. Everything about this scene was completely beyond any vision quest or meditative experience he'd ever had. He could almost believe that this was the alien who'd tried to lure Kathryn into his matrix, if the circumstances and the message hadn't been so different. No, this was her father all right. Nobody else would calmly order, threaten, and laugh out loud as part of a beyond the grave get-to-know-you conversation with his new son-in-law. Finally, he met Janeway's eyes. "This is the second best news I've ever had, sir."
"And the first?" Janeway demanded.
Chakotay couldn't help but grin. "When Kathryn told me she was taking me home with her after debriefings."
Janeway nodded. "Figures. That's all right then."
Chakotay turned to go.
"Wait! One more thing," Janeway commanded.
"Yes sir?"
"Name her Mabel. After my great-aunt. Katie will know why." Janeway saluted again and made an abrupt 180 degree pivot to march away.
Chakotay opened his eyes to brilliant summer evening light glowing on the surface of the lake. He turned his head to see the cabin, tucked into the trees above him, almost invisible in the cool shade. Quickly he rolled his medicine bundle and took off at a jog for the cabin.
Kathryn was sipping herbal tea and reading some old bound book she'd found earlier on a shelf, when Chakotay burst in the screen door from the deck. He stood in the doorframe, panting, bundle stuffed under one arm.
"What in the world is after you?" Kathryn exclaimed from her comfortable post on the couch, resting her mug on the coffee table. "You look like you'd seen a ghost."
He stepped inside and laid the medicine bundle on a low chair whose upholstery was wearing through. "Something like that," he said. He came around the table to perch on the far end of the couch and take her feet in his hands under the light cotton blanket that covered her knees. "Is there something you'd like to tell me, Kathryn?"
Her pink cheeks turned pale. "How did you know?"
He shook his head. "I'll tell you later. How far along?"
"Only a few weeks," she said, looking up at him with an uncomfortable stare. "I wouldn't have had any idea if it weren't for this flu. I've never been sick like this, so I – I scanned myself."
"When?"
"Three days ago," she admitted, wrapping her arms around her middle.
"Why didn't you tell me right away?" he asked, moving his hands up her calves, inching closer.
"It's so absurd!" she said with an exaggerated sigh. "Who gets pregnant on their honeymoon at age 45? We have so many plans! What are we going to do?"
He reached around her knees to grab her hands. "I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to cut off a big hunk of that fallen willow uphill from the cabin and carve a cradle. And you – you are going to let me take care of you for a change."
She clung to his hands. "That won't be much of a change," she said with a smile and a little head shake. "Chakotay, I don't know the first damn thing about being a mother. I didn't plan this. I'm not prepared. What if I'm terrible at it?" She looked genuinely terrorized as she searched his amused brown eyes for answers.
He lifted her right hand to his lips. "You will not be terrible. And even if you are, you'll get better. Nobody will be grading you. And I'll be there. I grew up surrounded by babies."
She leaned back, pulling Chakotay with her until he was beside her on the couch, holding her against him. "You know what I wish?" she asked. He shook his head. "I wish my dad were still around. He would have made the most wonderful grandfather."
Chakotay pulled her snug under his arm and kissed her forehead. "I have a feeling he's here, Kathryn," he said. "A strong feeling." He hesitated only a second before asking, "What do you think of the name Mabel?"
Her keen blue eyes, when they raised up fast to meet his, were filled with wonder.