Resolution
Season: 8/9
Spoilers: Threads, hint of Season 9.
Genre: Romance, fluff. SJ.
Disclaimer: I don't own it. Never have, never will.
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Notes: My attempt at the typical post-Threads cabin romance scene. You know, it beats me why I write fluff (and this is as fluffy as they come). I cringe every time I re-read what I've done. It's just pure sap. Please don't drown in it.
He sat on the dock in the mid-afternoon sun. He wasn't fishing. His pole sat beside him as he stared pensively into the water, a frown creasing his forehead and his arms crossed in front of him. Daniel and Teal'c had gone into town in order to buy more groceries and of course, more beer. Sam was inside taking a much-needed nap.
Sam. His frown deepened and he scrubbed one hand tiredly over his face before re-crossing his arms over his chest. He was worried about her. She seemed to have taken the death of her father and the break up with Pete awfully well. Too well. After the funeral and everything had settled down, the four of them had come to Jack's cabin for some much needed rest and relaxation. He and Sam had fallen into a relaxed bond with each other, peaceful and calm with a hint of the banter that had been more prevalent in the beginning of their friendship. He'd been surprised but he'd gone with it, figuring that she needed this as a means of coping with her loss. He'd even welcomed it. The tension that had featured so strongly in their interactions as of late was seemingly gone. They were comfortable with each other.
But he was certain that it wouldn't last. She needed to talk about her feelings rather than bottle them up inside. He himself was living proof that that particular course of action didn't turn out well. He sighed. He didn't want to bring the good times to an end. But he owed it to her to help her come to terms with her loss and move on. He cared about her. He loved her.
He could admit it now. He loved her. It seemed as though he always had. And he was determined to do something about it. Not now. It was all too recent at the moment but at some point in the future he was determined to address the nebulous something that floated between them and occasionally coalesced into something tangible. It seemed to him that, though a twisted cliché, all roads in his life led to Sam. And he was determined not to let her go without a fight.
Scenarios rolled through his mind. Retirement. Transfers. Hell, he could even quit. But it wasn't going to be entirely his decision. If Sam didn't want him, there was no point in retirement. Retirement with only his fish (or lack thereof) would make him stir-crazy in a matter of weeks. No, it was Sam's choice, all in good time. He could wait. He'd already waited a long time.
He heard the back door of the cabin close gently. He turned his head slightly and saw Sam coming down the dock towards him, dressed in jeans and a knitted top. He turned back to the water. He heard her light footsteps coming closer and felt her come to a halt just behind him over his left shoulder. He acted nonchalant, still glancing into the water of his pond. 'Hi Carter,' he said. 'Nice nap?'
Sam stood there silently, analysing his posture for any clue of what he'd been thinking about for so long. She'd been watching him from the cabin, trying to gather the courage to come and talk to him. With the boys gone, now was the perfect opportunity. They needed to talk. She knew that it was necessary as well as inevitable, because he most certainly was not going to let it go. She also knew that if left to him, it would take another eight years for him to actually initiate the conversation. In some ways he was just too considerate of her feelings. So she decided to take matters into her own hands.
She put her hand on his shoulder and slid sideways onto his lap before he could react. Reflexively his hands slid to her waist as he looked at her with a shocked expression. 'Carter?'
'Sam,' she corrected firmly. They most definitely had to have this conversation on first name terms.
He stared at her in surprise. His eyes travelled from her face down her body to where his hands rested gently at her waist. 'What are we doing?' He enquired.
'Talking,' she calmly replied, angling her body so that she could more easily look him in the eye. 'We need to talk.'
'I know.' His response was characteristically succinct, without being curt. 'Are you sure you want to do this now?' He asked, keeping his eyes fixed on her face, rather than letting them wander over her body. His hands still curled lightly around her waist, fingers moving lightly against the wool of her top.
'Definitely,' Sam said, determined to get everything out in the open and clear the air between them. Her hands fidgeted where they lay in her lap in an uncharacteristic display of nervousness. She knew this was going to be painful, like ripping off a bandaid or pulling a tooth. She allowed herself a small smile at the use of the clichés.
'Any particular reason for the…location?' He enquired, removing one hand from her waist to gesture loosely at her position, comfortably ensconced in his lap. He replaced his hand on her waist, slightly lower than before.
'I needed your attention,' was her simple reply.
'Well, you certainly got that,' he answered, a faint grin curling the edges of his mouth upwards.
Sam smiled slightly in response before becoming serious again. 'Look Jack, we do have to talk. You know it. And if I left it to you, we wouldn't talk until it was too late to make the effort worthwhile. So here I am.' She gazed determinedly at him, their eyes locked, not letting him look away.
'Right. What do you want to talk about?' He asked, unwilling to initiate their discussion.
'My dad said some things to me before he died,' Sam said, her eyes growing sad at the memory of her father. 'Things that I already knew but didn't want to admit to myself. He said some things that I never imagined that I would hear my father say, about disregarding rules in order to be happy.' She paused, taking a deep breath. 'That I could have everything that I wanted.'
Jack closed his eyes briefly. He hadn't expected this conversation to be so soon. He tried for a slightly up-beat demeanour, 'Well if anyone is capable of getting what they want, it's you. I was always glad that you were on our side. You just have to work out what you do want.'
'I know what I want, Jack. I want you. And I'm sick of waiting around and putting my life on hold.' Sam took another calming breath and paused. Jack remained silent, waiting to hear what she had to say. Her feelings seemed to be corresponding with his wildest dreams.
'I feel so bad for how I treated Pete. He deserved so much better. I guess I deluded myself into thinking that I was normal and that I needed a normal life; that this war we were in wasn't going to end. I wanted some chance of happiness, even if it wasn't with you.'
'And then everything happened at once. The end of the war, Daniel dying and coming back again, Dad dying…it helped me realise some things, get everything straight in my mind. I knew I needed to talk to you, to try and explain myself, to say how sorry I am.' Tears began to fall silently from her eyes, sliding down her cheeks. 'Can you forgive me for how I treated you?'
Jack put his arms around her shoulders and pulled her to his chest, holding her against him and whispering in her ear. 'Sam. Sam, it's alright. It's my fault too, and probably more than it is yours. I was too much of a coward to do anything about us. And I knew there was an us. I didn't request a transfer, I didn't retire, I didn't do anything on any of the opportunities you gave me.' He fell silent after his uncharacteristic speech, revealing so much of his feelings.
He placed his chin over her shoulder, held her tightly and said, 'its okay, we'll fix it. We'll make it all better.' She slowly calmed, and he gently rubbed her back in small circles. Eventually she pulled away from him slightly wiping her tears away with the back of her hand.
'God, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to fall apart like that.' She searched her pockets for a tissue. As she dabbed at her face she asked, 'how are we going to fix it?'
'Don't worry, I have some ideas.' He kissed her on the forehead and lifted her to her feet. He put his arm around her waist and led her towards the cabin. 'But first, let's get you all cleaned up so the boys don't think I've been upsetting you when they get back.' She gave a weak chuckle. 'Then we'll sit down and I'll tell you all about it.'
He opened the back door and let her go through first. He headed for the small kitchen area to find something to drink. Sam went off to the bathroom. When she came back, face washed and tear-free, he was sitting on the sofa holding two beers. She sat down close beside him, feeling slightly ashamed of her earlier outburst. He handed her a beer and put his arm comfortingly around her shoulders.
'I could retire,' he said simply. It's something I've been meaning to do for years but there's been too much going on.'
Sam snuggled slightly into his side. 'I don't want you to retire,' she said quietly, 'and I don't think they'd let you anyway. You're "too valuable to the program," just like me.' A slight bitterness tinged her tone.
Jack shrugged noncommittally. 'Maybe. I could transfer?'
'Where would they transfer you to?' Sam replied, 'I don't think they'd let you do that either.'
'We could try? General Hammond's been mentioning retirement for a while now.' Jack was still calm. He knew they were determined to make this work. They'd find a way.
Sam looked at him. 'I have an idea. I've had it for a while, ever since we beat the Replicators in fact. Teal'c's going to want to rejoin the Jaffa and Daniel will want to go to Atlantis. You don't have a genuine excuse to keep him here anymore.' She smiled. 'And if General Hammond retires and you get appointed to take his place, you'll leave too. I wouldn't want to stay there without all of you. I was thinking of going to Area 51.'
'With all the geeks?' Asked Jack, a teasing grin on his face. He could imagine Sam having a ball at '51.
Sam grinned back at him. 'Yes, with all the geeks. I am a geek you know.' She bravely rested her head on Jack's shoulder. 'I need a break from front-line action. And I've always wanted to have more time to analyse all the technology that we've brought back through the gate. It really is an ideal opportunity.'
'You really seem to have thought it through,' Jack answered. 'But what if I get transferred to Washington? We'll be back in the same chain of command.'
Sam thought for a moment. 'If I put a request for transfer on your desk as soon as we get back, hopefully it will go through before there's an opportunity for you to get transferred. That way there would be a period of time when I wasn't under your command. We could … take advantage of that.' Sam hesitated.
'Marry me.' Jack's response was swift and decisive, revealing none of the trepidation he felt. He put his beer down, took Sam's away from her and held both her hands, looking into her eyes. He could see shock reflected in hers.
'What?' She asked, temporarily breathless.
'Marry me. If your plan works out, and let's face it, they pretty much always do, we might only have that small window to work something out before it all goes to hell again. I don't want to ruin your career and you won't let me retire, so we'd be back to square one. If we're married, we're exempt from the frat. regs. So … marry me?' He was on tender hooks.
'That…' Sam was trying to grasp the situation, 'that's a brilliant idea.' She gave one of her brilliant smiles. Her blue eyes widened in realisation, 'did you just ask me to marry you?'
'Yup,' Jack grinned smugly. He could see that she wasn't against the idea. 'So?'
Sam hugged him tightly, 'Yes. Yes, of course I will!'
Jack hugged her back and then gently disengaged her arms from around his neck. He kissed her on the forehead and once chastely on the lips. 'No more until it's legal,' he teased.
'Agreed,' Sam said as she burrowed her way happily into his side, wrapping her hands around his middle. Jack put his arm back around her shoulders. Sam sighed contentedly. 'I love you, Jack.'
Jack smiled and rested his chin on the top of her head.
'Always.'
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A/N: I seem to mentally gag every time I get to Sam's acceptance…